Choir members gang up on ministry leader

[leonie]

Well, Ceil, I don’t know what went on with the choir, but the choir director was a very mediocre singer. And, his music selection was liturgically tied into the readings, but it was often just horrible.

Like during Advent–when we had to sing, “we are going to see the King” over and over. ugh.

And I wasn’t happy that the young adult musicians had to stop playing the traditional hymns I loved and stick to the banal stuff.

So, I wouldn’t call him more traditional than the prior director.

I have mixed emotions about the situation. I am sorry it got ugly. I’m sorry that the poor guy lost his job after only a few months. I’m sorry our dear pastor is upset.

But, I’m really glad that he’s gone. I was dreading the years to come with him as a Choir director. Sometimes, I’d sit in Mass with our liberal associate pastor’s horrible heretical homilies and bored demeanor and listen to the banal uninspiring music, and contemplate flight to the TLM parish downtown…

But, then again, better the evil you know…who knows what is next.

 

[leonie]

I
Try talking to your pastor. Ask what you can do in order to be part of the solution to this problem, rather than part of the problem itself.

I’m guessing that at least part of the answer is going to be prayer and a desire to have an unfailingly humble, positive attitude. There are few things more powerful than prayer and good example.

Another possibility is to frequent the Sacrament of Reconciliation, assuming you don’t already do so. There is nothing for increasing compassion and decreasing hypocrisy like a regular appointment with contrition. You may not be the worst hypocrite in your parish by a longshot, but there is exactly one person’s hypocrisy over which you have any direct influence.

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BTW, Easterjoy, Ceil is very loving, devout, charitable and humble Catholic.

 

[Ceil-1]

Thanks, Leonie. :hug1:

I have given this some thought and prayer. This whole thing may have been a case of giving a friend a job instead of searching for the best qualified person. The man was hired, I think, before the other guy even left.

I have participated in choirs for many years of my life. I have never encountered any as obnoxious as some you have described. I have always looked up to the director as “the boss”, so to speak. I would have submitted to him in the interest of having a better product. I would never have attacked him or had him fired. I am certain the problems could have been ironed out if those involved had been charitable

Well, it is out of my sphere of influence, so I will wait for a good music ministry to arrive, and then join the choir… then I will let them have it… no, just kidding. No, I will pray that everyone involved emerge from this a little bit better.

I am still shocked and scandalized by the incident, but, I am a little more philosophical about it now. The offending choir’s time slot happens to be the one we regularly attend. It could be a lesson in detachment.

 

[peary]

Our music ministry leader lost his job when one of the choirs threatened the pastor they would quit if he didn’t leave. From what I understand, things got quite dicey.

I won’t get into the accusations, but, it was basically a matter of their not liking his personality, choice of music, etc.

I am disturbed about this on many levels. First, how does a handful of people come off demanding anything and get away with it?

Second of all, I am told that the lack of love demonstrated by these people is staggering.

Third of all, what weak leadership, that the pastor would give in to these uncharitable malcontents.

This sort of attitude is rampant also in the SVDP society, the K of C, and many of the other ministries as well. The fists are so tight, you need a crowbar to get them open. I say this on behalf of the poor I try to serve.

Such hypocrisy, experienced in my youth, made me give up all churches as social clubs. Small wonder the church is faltering with this type of behavior.

It makes me not even want to go to Mass because of the ill-will it conjures up. Help.

Believe me, it’s not much better at nonCatholic churches!

 

[EasterJoy]

BTW, Easterjoy, Ceil is very loving, devout, charitable and humble Catholic.

Well, if you have back-biting at your parish, you can’t have too many of those!

I don’t doubt she is very loving, or this wouldn’t upset her so much. Still, it sounds as if there are plenty of issues for her to deal with first-hand in the ministries that she is actually in, without concerning herself with the ones that she isn’t in.

Outside agitation doesn’t usually prove to be very helpful. It is hard to do, but unless someone asks you to take a role, sometimes you have to step back, pray, be supportive where you can, but otherwise let the people involved handle it themselves. It is very difficult to be at peace if you don’t. If you don’t have peace, what do you have to offer anyone else?

 

[EasterJoy]

BTW, Easterjoy, Ceil is very loving, devout, charitable and humble Catholic.

I don’t doubt that she is. The problem is that she is getting so agitated about a problem that doesn’t concern her directly and in which no one has asked her to take a role that she doesn’t want to go to Mass any more! That’s pretty agitated!

Friction within the ministries in which she is personally involved are one thing. Providing support to her friend who is directly involved is also her proper role, of course. Nevertheless, there is a point at which you have to pray for help from the source that can actually provide it, and, if no one has any other ideas for how you can be of service, leave it at that.