My concern is my daughter. At the liberal parish, I’m concerned she might hear some heterodoxy. But I’m aware that I’m ultimately responsible for her faith formation. At the TLM parish, I’m afraid she will be bored out of her mind (she’s 5 yrs old) and will have a dislike for church (especially considering that on the weekends that her grandpa has her he takes her to a protestant service, which obviously is more lively than a TLM and I think kids like things that are more lively).
Okay, I have a couple of insights since I have children in this age group. First, the TLM is no more “boring” for a 5 year old than a Novus Ordo mass. In fact, one could easily argue the TLM is actually more interesting for such a small child, because of the interesting ritual.
I guarantee your 5 year old gets very little out of the contemporary Novus Ordo. So you really shouldn’t look at language as that big of an obstacle.
Now in regards to her grandpa taking her to a Protestant service, only you can fix that. First, of course you make it clear that while grandpa is free to take her to protestant services, he is to make sure that nobody pressures her into choosing between Catholicism and Protestantism. Simply inform him that is way too much pressure for a small child, and that small children view choosing between religions the same as choosing between guardians (grandfather and mother). That’s not fair to the child, and no child should ever feel pressured or forced into that situation. Assure the grandfather you’re not worried about him, it’s the others at his church you would like him to keep an eye on. If she ever feels pressured, it will be just as damaging to her relationship with grandpa as it will with her mom.
Now the rest is again up to you. You’ll have to do some educating with your child about the different Christian faiths. We’re in a similar situation with our children who have grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins who are Evangelicals. What I do is tell my children that Jesus has lots of sheep, and he wants them all in the sheep pen which is his Catholic Church. He wants them there to keep them safe from the storms, but some are not ready to go in yet. I also tell them that Jesus built the Catholic Church on the rock, so when the storms come it will not crumble because it is built on a strong rock, but other churches are not built on that rock so they might crumble in the storms.
These are simplistic illustrations, and of course I do try to explain the meaning of them as I can, and as they are able to understand. But these mental pictures will serve their purpose for the time being. I don’t have a problem with letting my kids go to an Evangelical service once in a while so they can experience it. Nor do I have a problem sending them to Vacation Bible School at a nearby Catholic Church where they will have a similar experience. Likewise, I do put on contemporary Christian music while driving in my car, even though I am a very traditional Catholic and prefer to listen to more traditional music. I do this so my children will get variety, and they will never feel they have to “choose” between what they believe to be “boring” Catholic worship and “exciting” Evangelical prayer and praise services.
I try to explain to them the difference between worship and prayer, as well as worship and praise. I try to explain that worship is not the same as prayer and praise, and that worship involves sacrifice, otherwise it’s not fully worship. Christians are supposed to pray and praise God, but at the same time we need more. We need to worship him too, and that involves the sacrifice of the mass.
So far I’ve not had any problems with my kids on this issue.
Be a light for orthodoxy in your current parish AND expose your daughter to the richness of Catholic tradition.
I long for a Vat 2 parish with Lifeteen and not emphasizing some of the sins the CC defines as mortal.