While I agree that the cohabitating situation could have been better handled, it sounds to me as though you’re bringing the light of Christ to many people through your hospitality. I just thought I’d point that out because these threads can sound a little negative sometimes.
Annemariels, are you really serious? Are you surprised that you proudly posted a story of not following Church teaching and inviting a couple into your house and facilitated their fornication, and then got negative responses?
Oooooooohhhh! Okay that makes so much more sense. I don’t know why I did not catch that the question to the apologist and you were two different people! The first thing that was so confusing was the post that stated the couple was married.
You don’t believe that every time a couple sleeps next to each other they have sex, do you? If so, you must be one tired person!! LOL Seriously, there are many nights I sleep next to my husband and we don’t have sex. I’m sure we cannot assume this couple will have sex simply because they shared a bed.
Agreed. And it seems hasty and judgmental to assume that, just because a couple shares a bed or has sex, “their relationship is … solely based on sex and nothing else.” Cohabitation is a sin, but engaging in a sin does not reduce a relationship to “nothing.”
Seriously? My girlfriend and I have stayed with her parents, both in their home and in vacation cabins that they have rented, and we sleep in the same bed. At their request, we have never engaged in more sexual activity under their roof than a kiss goodnight, and it has never bothered us, we just sleep much better with the other there.
It sounds like you handled it graciously and your guests were respectful of your wishes.
Instead, it drives people away. This thread is bringing out the sharks who smell the blood in the water. It reminds me of a feeding frenzy.
I think it’s perfectly reasonable to expect your non-married guests to follow your “rules” about sleeping arrangements IF YOU HAVE MADE THEM AWARE OF THE RULES BEFOREHAND. But I can understand how this might be a source of resentment if you decided to spring this on them after they traveled some distance to get to your home.
This is why I show my guests their rooms as soon as they arrive. I don’t make any explanations. I’ve never had anyone question me. If they did, I would simply say that I don’t believe in sleeping together before marriage. I would hope that we wouldn’t get into an argument or discussion about it. If they did I think I would just repeat that " this is your room and that is his/her room" All I can do is provide the appropriate accommdations. What they do from there is their decision. My guests probably know my beliefs a head of time. All I expect is for them to respect my beliefs while in my home.
Ditto. As a guest in someone’s home, you are obligated to comply with their beliefs (within reason). As a host, you are obligated to warn potential guests about any beliefs that are contrary to popular culture (and, in the interest of politeness, refrain from explaining those beliefs with a holier-than-thou attitude.)I think it was wrong for your friend to not warn you beforehand and to spring it on you late at night at the last minute.
It sounds like your girlfriend was embarrassed and that is why she wanted to leave, rather than the sleeping arrangements not being to her liking in the 11th hour.
How in the world did you come to that conclusion? Embarrassed about what?
No, I doubt that would have been a problem. Like I said, it wasn’t really the sleeping arrangements, but rather the presumptuous, self-righteous, and completely unexpected imposition of her newly discovered standards that was so objectionable.