Confessing the same sin too often?

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Martin_Venator

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Hello, ladies and gentlemen.

I’m a young guy and am struggling with sexual temptation and the sin that comes with it for about a year now. Although I was baptized as a child and received the confirmation as an adolescent I never really bothered with the church and only started practising the faith about two years ago.

Although I’ve managed to steer clear for it up to a month or more, temptation keeps returning and strikes where I’m most vulnerable, namely in my dreams. I am fully aware of the fact that it’s a mortal sin every time, feel deeply embarassed about it afterwards and have put some techniques in place to combat these tendencies.

Yet every time I sit in the confessional I get the feeling that I am abusing the sacrament because I’ve been carrying this particular sin on me into there for a few times already.

The same goes for other sins like my unending arrogance or lying which I fortunately have largely mitigated thanks to Him, but the major concern here still are sins against my sexuality.

Theologically speaking, is there anything to consider when confessing the same sins multiple times? Does my regret become less genuine according to church teaching? Note that I’m writing up everything I can think of using the confessional aid of a Swiss FSSP father prior to receiving the sacrament.

Since this is my first post, I hope that I didn’t do anything wrong. Also, English is not my native tongue so don’t be surprised if anything is awkwardly worded.

Kindest regards, Martin.
 
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The Morality of Dreams by Fr John Flader
“If in the dream we did something that in a waking state would have been a sin, we are not guilty of a sin, even though we may have a certain sense of shame or remorse for even having dreamed it.”

Sinful Activity in Lucid Dreams
Martin_Venator said:
is there anything to consider when confessing the same sins multiple times?
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Just be humble, truly sorry with a firm purpose of amendment.

Am I a “Catholic failure” because I keep confessing the same sins?

How many times should I confess the same sin?

Twelve Things to Remember If You Keep Falling Into the Same Sin by Fr Richard Heilman
 
It is normal to be confessing the same sins every confession. You struggle with habitual sins and so you need and want to stop these sins. That is good. You do not abuse the sacrament if you are sorry when you go to confession and truly intend to try to stop the sin. From your post you are trying hard to overcome sin. It doesn’t mean you won’t fall again. Going to confession frequently can be a great aide in overcoming habitual sins so make use of it even if it feels like you are confessing the same sins over and over again. A priest can also give you more advice if you need and there are books and resources out there that have good tips for overcoming sexual sins.

Sexual sins especially masturbation are so common and once they become a habit they are harder to stop. It seems like you have made some good progress already which is great. If you commit an act while you are asleep it is possible you are not fully culpable. You could talk about it with a priest and I’m sure they could give you some advice on the matter

Keep up the good fight!
 
You are in good company. I confess most of the same sins each time. What matters is your intention of trying to to better. God sees your heart and your struggles. He knows you are sincere.

Next time you struggle with sexual sins know that you may call upon God and ask for His help, even when you are suuuper close to committing the sin. Call upon our heavenily Father and the Blessed Mother. We are human beings, we can´t make it alone, God knows that, so pray to Him when you are in temptation.

Make sure you don´t give up. It will take some time and some effort of you to get rid of the habit, but when you finally have, with the help of God, it´s going to be better.
 
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Here is a quote which has helped me a lot:

The more persistent the temptation, the clearer it is that you have not given consent to it. “It is a good sign,” says St. Francis de Sales, “when the tempter makes so much noise and commotion outside of the will, for it shows that he is not within.” An enemy does not besiege a fortress that is already in his power, and the more obstinate the attack, the more certain We may be that our resistance continues.​
  1. Your fears lead you to believe you are defeated at the very moment you are gaining the victory. This comes from the fact that you confound feeling with consent, and, mistaking a passive condition of the imagination for an act of the will, you consider that you have yielded to the temptation because you felt it keenly.[/indent]
    From Light and Peace by Fr. Quadrupani
This is a great book and pretty short! And can also be found in audio at Librivox

I sometimes feel that I must have sinned because I was tempted strongly or for a long time. Now I know this is not the case! So in the face of temptation, I pray for help. This is good in two ways, we get help, and the temptations are reduced, because what good is a temptation if it is always met with prayer?
 
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Thank you - all of you - for your advice. I know god’s mercy is inexhaustible, but nevertheless it just doesn’t feel “genuine” to me to march into confession repeatedly with the very same sins on my mind. I’ve previously sinned with the thought “Eh, I can just confess it again” and also mentioned this detail to the father every time this happened. My regret is genuine, but before I sin this thought is often the last stage of “bargaining” which also gets mentioned in one of the links posted, and it makes me afraid my regret might weaken.

I appreciate the useful material you posted, particularly the plethora of links and what St. Francois de Sales has to say on the matter. God bless you.
 
We all are sinners.
Temptation is always out there.
When we sin, we confess and receive absolution.
Then we receive Holy Communion.
It is as simple and glorious at that.
God is great. His mercy endures forever!
God bless you! 🙏🙏🙏
 
Better to confess the same sins than add on new ones, right? I say that only partially in jest - we should be using the confessional somewhat like a workout facility, growing a little stronger and better each time.
 
You are not abusing the sacrament by confessing the same sin over and over. Right now, I am struggling with the exact same thing as your are and I have confessed the same sins over and over and over again. I know it can be frustrating but keep doing it.
 
What do you want, new sins to confess?

Didn’t think so. Welcome to the world of serial sinners.

You’re in good company.
 
awesomecatholic said:
You are not abusing the sacrament by confessing the same sin over and over. Right now, I am struggling with the exact same thing as your are and I have confessed the same sins over and over and over again. I know it can be frustrating but keep doing it.
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The only caveat is not to confess sins already forgiven.
 
On this subject I recall seeing from an old Catechism a line similar to the following:

Q: Why does a person confess the same sins repeatedly?
A: Because they do not have full contrition when they confess.

Now, I’m certainly not advocating that answer to the OP!!!, and fully agree with all the previous, more encouraging answers.

But I am curious about this apparently “traditional” answer. I’ve checked the Baltimore Catechism on Confession and can’t see it there. On the contrary, the catechism seems to say everything about confession which we still advise in CAF. It doesn’t specifically address the question of this thread, and, by omission, is likely to imply acceptance of confessing the same sins regularly.

But, just out of curiousity, does anyone know where that old answer, which I think I saw once, may be found? Or am I imagining things?

Thanks! 😀
As well as the previous encouraging answers, I hold to Bishop Sheen. “Why does God allow us to sin? So that we can forgive others”. I only saw it in a video, so can’t recall the exact quote.
 
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Martin_Venator said:
temptation keeps returning and strikes where I’m most vulnerable
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This life is a constant spiritual war and your enemy never sleeps. Don’t let it stop you from fighting
Martin_Venator said:
I am fully aware of the fact that it’s a mortal sin every time, feel deeply embarassed about it afterwards
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Feeling bad about it shows you’re on the right team, at least. Our Lord Jesus died for all sins, which means when we freely choose to sin again, we put our Lord to the cross over and over again. I’m no saint, but the thought alone of crucifying my Lord again through my willful action has given me strength to resist temptation in the past.
Martin_Venator said:
Yet every time I sit in the confessional I get the feeling that I am abusing the sacrament because I’ve been carrying this particular sin on me into there for a few times already.
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Don’t think that once you confess a sin, you’ll never commit that sin again. We are all sick and the Sacraments are spiritual medicine that we constantly need in this life, not just a one and done vaccine. However, if you get the feeling that you’re abusing the sacrament, maybe its a nudge that you gotta fight harder.

Stay strong!
 
Confessing the Same Sins Over and Over Again

I just watched this awesome video (link above) from Father Mike that talked about this because I had the same thought too. I think he goes into great and relatable detail on why the same sin over and over again may actually not be a bad thing because we know what we need to improve on to become better.
 
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Unfortunately, I can’t quote you. But in reference to saying that you’ll confess the sin later and so going ahead and sinning, I do hope your priest, to whom you wisely mentioned this, explained about the additional sin of presumption?

Wrt your feeling not genuine, you might explore that feeling more. Maybe a part of you is trying to tell you something.

OTOH, it may be a “trick” to get you to stop going to confession.

Maybe try praying when you are tempted?
 
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