Confession and obedience to parents

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mymamamary

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Dear forum

I have a question. Am I bound to obey the command of my mom and dad when they have told me confession only once a week. What if I felt I need to go like today? Does a command involving the sacraments, for e.g, not to go, does that still hold for me? If I went, would it be a sin at all?
 
I would ask your confessor. It may be that your parents believe you suffer from scrupulosity?
 
Yes they do, however, I want to know if I am morally obligated to obey them in this situation
 
You are not obligated. However, since you are scrupulous you probably shouldn’t go more than once a week unless you are certain that you have committed a mortal sin.
 
mymamamary said:
Dear forum

I have a question. Am I bound to obey the command of my mom and dad when they have told me confession only once a week. What if I felt I need to go like today? Does a command involving the sacraments, for e.g, not to go, does that still hold for me? If I went, would it be a sin at all?
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You have serious scrupulosity issues, so you need to refer this question to your confessor-- who will probably tell you the same thing-- not to random people on the internet.
 
I dont recall which saint… but there is a saint that was continuously going to confession because he was never sure if his sins were really forgiven… His confessor eventually told him not to come again if its just to repeat the same sins and that they are already forgiven… It’s actually very good to go to confession as much as possible, that way you are keeping yourself clean. Your parents might have a good reason to tell you that… maybe they just feel that you should take more time with them? You are already lucky they alow you to go every week 🙂
 
mymamamary said:
Am I bound to obey the command of my mom and dad
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It depends on age 🙂 After a certain age, we are no longer bound by obedience under pain of sin to our parents.
2217 As long as a child lives at home with his parents, the child should obey his parents in all that they ask of him when it is for his good or that of the family. “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.” Children should also obey the reasonable directions of their teachers and all to whom their parents have entrusted them. But if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so.
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As they grow up, children should continue to respect their parents. They should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
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R_C said:
It depends on age 🙂 After a certain age, we are no longer bound by obedience under pain of sin to our parents.
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The OP is not asking about whether or not he is bound to obey his parents in general. He is asking about whether or not the obligation of obedience applies in regards to the sacraments. The answer of course is no.
 
Ask your confessor, not us random people on the internet. He’ll give you the correct answer.
 
devoutchristian said:
The OP is not asking about whether or not he is bound to obey his parents in general. He is asking about whether or not the obligation of obedience applies in regards to the sacraments. The answer of course is no.
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Good point. However, I do not think a 10-year-old kid who has been told he can’t go to Mass can walk out of his house and do as he pleases. But indeed it’s something to be addressed face-to-face by a priest.
 
mymamamary said:
Dear forum

I have a question. Am I bound to obey the command of my mom and dad when they have told me confession only once a week. What if I felt I need to go like today? Does a command involving the sacraments, for e.g, not to go, does that still hold for me? If I went, would it be a sin at all?
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Let’s take a look at what the Catechism says:
2217 As long as a child lives at home with his parents, the child should obey his parents in all that they ask of him when it is for his good or that of the family. "Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord."22 Children should also obey the reasonable directions of their teachers and all to whom their parents have entrusted them. But if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so.

As they grow up, children should continue to respect their parents. They should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
Here are some thoughts. Are you of the age where you must obey them, or are you an adult living on your own? Are they asking you to do something that is a sin? Are they giving this command with an eye to your own good? Are you causing disruptions in your family or its routine with unnecessarily frequent requests to go or be taken to confession?

In the typical instance it is not a sin to wait until Saturday to go to confession (the typical day for confession in my country).

Your confessor can answer your question.
 
R_C said:
It depends on age 🙂 After a certain age, we are no longer bound by obedience under pain of sin to our parents.
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A bit off topic perhaps, but what would that age be? Is it 21, 18? Or if you’re, I don’t know, 30 and unmarried and still living with your parents should you still obey them in everything? Just out of curiosity, I’ve always wondered this. 😛
 
EverWondering said:
A bit off topic perhaps, but what would that age be? Is it 21, 18? Or if you’re, I don’t know, 30 and unmarried and still living with your parents should you still obey them in everything? Just out of curiosity, I’ve always wondered this. 😛
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🤷 😃 The Catechism isn’t too clear: “Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children: not so respect”. So basically I assume it would be 18 or 21 or older, whenever the child or young adult is considered mature enough. Sometimes, the sorrows of life forces young people to become very mature and responsible at earlier ages. That’s not the case of the average high-schooler that thinks he’s already an adult and knows everything about life, of course.

I personally think it’s that time at which the person can tell his parents he’s considering marriage or consecrated life without being sent to his room with no supper 😛

Afterwards, my understanding is that what we use to give them under obligation of obedience and under pain of sin, we now give them out of the virtue of respect…much like when St. Paul wrote: “you are no longer under the Law, but under grace” 🙂 Of course, everything is a big word…emancipation means the person has his own life to be lived, and he now deserves the respect owed to an adult - a respect that the parent won’t, of course, give to a child, because it’s rooted on responsibility and on lowering the amount of protection and shielding from the world provided by the parent.

Then again, those are just my thoughts :rolleyes:
 
You live at home.

Your mom and dad pay all the bills.

They give you rides because you can’t drive on your own yet.

They buy and cook your food, and do your laundry.

They take you to the doctor when you’re sick, and countersign any forms you can’t sign because you’re not yet an adult.

You do what they tell you.

Sarah x 🙂
 
You live at home.

Your mom and dad pay all the bills.

They give you rides because you can’t drive on your own yet.

They buy and cook your food, and do your laundry.

They take you to the doctor when you’re sick, and countersign any forms you can’t sign because you’re not yet an adult.

You do what they tell you to do. 👍

Sarah x 🙂
 
mymamamary said:
Dear forum

I have a question. Am I bound to obey the command of my mom and dad when they have told me confession only once a week. What if I felt I need to go like today? Does a command involving the sacraments, for e.g, not to go, does that still hold for me? If I went, would it be a sin at all?
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My,

May I commend you for having posted over 1500 posts, in consideration that you are asking this question. This is admirable. I believe that a simple thing for you to do is to speak to your parents. If my child came to me and asked me if it was possible to confess more often then I would want to speak to them about that. Next, I would probably explain, that the Sacrament is usually only available on Saturday so once a week was within the limits of practicality. I would also explain that being concerned about following the commandments was admirable as was the desire to go to Sacrament. I would love this child for their willingness to come to me and speak to me about this.

Have you thought of talking to your parents?
 
My bad. I assumed that he would have had his license since he is 17.
 
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