Cremation and Mitigating Burial Costs

[bluerose]

We live in a rural area, with my brother-in-law owning a large plot of land with a remote corner which we have designated as our family burial plot. Because it borders Bureau of Land Management land, private property, and Native American tribal land, the only way we could bury our family members there was to have everyone agree to be cremated.

To date, my father-in-law, my brother-in-law’s wife, my husband’s uncle, and my husband’s grandfather are all buried there. All were cremated prior to the funeral Mass (my BIL’s wife died in a hospital in another state, and the logistics of transporting a body across state lines were a nightmare compared to transporting cremains. Ditto for another BIL whose wife passed away in a foreign country.) We had a funeral Mass then the interment was private, just the immediate family, and we did everything from digging the graves to erecting markers. No urns were used, just the box the cremains were packed in when given to the family and the graves were lined with a 5-gallon plastic bucket (room for two boxes of cremains for married couples… yes, my husband and I already have our plot ready.)

My husband’s uncle DID donate his body to medical study, with the understanding that he was to be cremated and returned to the family for burial. We made it clear to the hospital/medical school that he was a Catholic and that we expected his body to be treated with respect and reverence. Apparently, there is a protocol in place for this situation and everything was done appropriately.

 

[catholic47]

For us, even if the expense was not a factor, we would still have done direct cremation and Mass after cremation.

So you would not feel “guilty” for not having the body present for the Funeral Mass, which is considered “ideal” by the church? This is the part that I am wrestling with only because of the cost factor because I have to pay for two people that I was not anticipating - my mom and stepdad.

 

[catholic47]

I wish that funerals were not so expensive, because I’m not very enthusiastic about the newfound popularity of cremation.

I share this sentiment as well. Because I will be responsible for burying two people due to their limited financial needs (self-inflicted) and my frugal nature, I feel I am “forced” into the cremation option even as I believe and will opt for body burial for myself.

 

[catholic47]

But everything about a funeral is expensive. The local Catholic diocese will help pre-arrange funerals and arrange for pre-payment well in advance. They will give itemized cost comparisons for a variety of funeral homes. They will also supply wooden Trappist caskets which are less expensive than the ornate metal ones.

I have found the local Catholic Cemetery & Funeral Center to be more expensive than my local Catholic family run funeral home. The only thing they offer is a 4 year payment option at no interest, but the bottom line is that they are running a business as much as anyone else. For the same size niches, they actual will charges thousands more depending if the niche is located on the top, middle, or bottom for the same niche. So much for “corporate acts of mercy” on pricing.

 

[EnglishTeacher]

I shared this 2018 article a while back on another thread but sharing it again just for information and awareness, because I would like to see this option become more widespread: Catholic Cemeteries to offer ‘natural burial’ option starting in the fall.

This would be a wonderful alternative to cremation and to the expensive embalming-plus-ornate-casket option.

 

[TheLittleLady]

I did not feel guilty, and there were 5 priests presiding at my husband’s funeral, none of them took issue.

 

[ChurchSoldier]

You might want to check and see what the restrictions are on your deed. They may not allow transfer.

As far as selling private plots, you can google them in that cemetery. Generally speaking private sellers are surprised at the discount (meaning low selling price) for unused plots. I checked prices a couple years ago for a local woman and the pricing was dramatically lower.
(Sorry…!!!)

 

[CatholicELATeacher]

They do allow transfer.
As far as the resale price, who knows? I’m not planning on that but if I do, the fact that it’s the only unsold plot in a Catholic cemetery will factor in, I reckon.

 

[Dhc8_Type]

It made my grandpa feel good knowing a little piece of him was buried next to his two grandchildren (my younger siblings) who died in infancy.