Cursillo

[Bruised_Reed]

Ours is diocese wide and I’d have been VERY willing to pay more for good food and beverages. If budget was a huge issue, I’d have been more than happy to bring my own food.

Actually I learned some lessons:

1. ALWAYS bring my OWN food with me on any kind of retreat.
2. ALWAYS provide my OWN transportation to any kind of retreat.
3. NEVER give up my watch or phone. I would respect the request not to use the phone. Watch is needed for medications.
4. NEVER EVER allow anyone else control over my meds unless I’m in the hospital and the doc is aware.
5. If I need a break, I will take one. If I am denied time to myself (even just 30 minutes would probably be fine) I will leave.

If I am not allowed the above, then I will turn and run like the devil himself were after me, I would choose to NOT attend any kind of anything that would disallow the above.

I agree with this according to one’s need. For example, I probably wouldn’t need to concern my self with food and I don’t wear a watch. They will have to trust that I won’t use my phone (even for the time ) and no, they don’t get to keep my meds.

I’m angry that you were treated the way you were, especially in the name of Christ.

And share the goal of the weekend, what is the culmination on Sunday supposed to be?

I can’t speak to the other things; I don’t have any Cursillo materials, but ultimately Cursillo is supposed to prepare you to evangelize your neighbor. So whether it’s at work, with the other parents in the playgroup or kids’ sports team, you are ready to share your faith. I don’t know if this is the motto but what I heard was “Make a friend, be a friend, bring a friend to Christ.” People, not projects.

And a lot of people think the weekend is the main event, or sometimes the end of Cursillo when it is the beginning. The most important part of Cursillo are the groupings (as they are called in my area) meeting in small groups. Basically it was Cursillestas in your area (around 6-8 people) would gather regularly to talk about how they were able to share their faith and to pray for and support each other.

Not only that, someone interested in Cursillo should be invited to participate in a small group to see if it is his or her cup of tea because that is where the commitment to Cursillo lies. And just like with any group, religious or otherwise, human beings are involved so there is bound to be someone that does something weird. In my mom’s small group there was a woman who had taken a lot of courses and thought she was ahead of everyone spiritually and theologically and tried to use it for her own agenda by trying to sway the format or monopolize the time. Most people are not like that but when it happens it can change the experience for everyone.

 

[CB_Catholic]

So please, share with us how the menus are planned and what time you are supposed to send everyone to bed and what time you are supposed to wake everyone up. Please share why the people don’t get any time to themselves. Please share why they don’t allow the folks attending the weekend to drive themselves.
And share the goal of the weekend, what is the culmination on Sunday supposed to be?

No. Not because it’s a secret, but because I am thoroughly fed up with these ridiculous accusations. I am sorry you had a bad experience. I am grateful to God for my Cursillo experience, and for how it has enriched my relationship with Him, and how these lovely people have dedicated themselves to evangelizing for Jesus Christ. If you can’t accept that, too bad. I have nothing more to say, and I am unsubscribing from what has turned out to be a nasty and vicious thread. I am not going to contribute any more to this nonsense.

 

[gh4]

No. Not because it’s a secret, but because I am thoroughly fed up with these ridiculous accusations. I am sorry you had a bad experience. I am grateful to God for my Cursillo experience, and for how it has enriched my relationship with Him, and how these lovely people have dedicated themselves to evangelizing for Jesus Christ. If you can’t accept that, too bad. I have nothing more to say, and I am unsubscribing from what has turned out to be a nasty and vicious thread. I am not going to contribute any more to this nonsense.

I’m not being nasty or by any mean vicious, nor have I seen any vicious posts.

BUT, this is the VERY REASON that someone else could be hurt, because someone just like you will say NO when they want to know what goes on and what happens.

I do believe you had a good cursillo and had good people who did it right. I accept that there are good ones and have always said that. I have never made a blanket statement that all cursillos are bad, never.

I am saying that there is the potential there for people who aren’t really familiar with how they are supposed to be doing this to hurt people and that there needs to be much better quality control for these weekends.

People say don’t go if you don’t like this kind of retreat, again, the reason they don’t refrain from going is because they have no clue as to what is going to happen because no one will tell them. You are perpetuating this.

 

[BlueRoses12]

I’m not being nasty or by any mean vicious, nor have I seen any vicious posts.

I agree. Heated, yes – appropriately, imo – but not nasty or vicious.

BUT, this is the VERY REASON that someone else could be hurt, because someone just like you will say NO when they want to know what goes on and what happens. …] People say don’t go if you don’t like this kind of retreat, again, the reason they don’t refrain from going is because they have no clue as to what is going to happen because no one will tell them. You are perpetuating this.

Exactly.

Oh, my goodness, it seems to be a pattern – people backing out of a conversation (in which they are factually outgunned) by throwing a hissy fit and claiming we’re all a bunch of meanies. They’d answer our questions easily except we’re too rude, and they won’t stoop to our level. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

I think it was on this thread, months ago, that I made a parting request – asking if anything had happened from the report or query someone was going to make, of the Cursillo establishment. I take it that the resounding silence was the only reply?

I hope you’re doing okay, GH4. Again, I’m so sorry this happened.

 

[Jeremiah1278]

I agree. Heated, yes – appropriately, imo – but not nasty or vicious.

Exactly.

Oh, my goodness, it seems to be a pattern – people backing out of a conversation (in which they are factually outgunned) by throwing a hissy fit and claiming we’re all a bunch of meanies. They’d answer our questions easily except we’re too rude, and they won’t stoop to our level. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

I think it was on this thread, months ago, that I made a parting request – asking if anything had happened from the report or query someone was going to make, of the Cursillo establishment. I take it that the resounding silence was the only reply?

I hope you’re doing okay, GH4. Again, I’m so sorry this happened.

I think it was I who said we should reach out to Cursillo. To be fair—I just never followed through with this.

And people back out of conversations that can get uncomfortable. Or when people are attacking something they love or enjoy. So let’s cut everyone some slack and let’s be charitable.

 

[gh4]

I hope you’re doing okay, GH4. Again, I’m so sorry this happened.

I’m doing well, thank you for asking. I have left the catholic church and plan to never return. I have joined another church and am beyond happy there. The cursillo from heck was the beginning of my eyes being opened about the catholic church. It took another year after the cursillo for me to understand that there was nothing in the catholic church for me.

 

[gh4]

And people back out of conversations that can get uncomfortable. Or when people are attacking something they love or enjoy. So let’s cut everyone some slack and let’s be charitable.

As I have said over and over, I have no doubt that there are GOOD cursillos somewhere, just not here in the area where I live.
I still believe that people should get the basic information before they step foot into the cursillo. They need to understand what the process is and how it will work for them. That’s the ONLY way someone can make an informed decision to attend any kind of retreat like this.

1. You will be driven to the cursillo because we don’t want it to be easy for you to leave.
2. You will have NOT ONE MINUTE alone during the cursillo.
3. You will get up early and go to bed late and you will be deprived of sleep.
4. The food will be carbs, many many carbs. Very little protein, very little fresh veggies or fruits if any. We were not allowed to use real knives or forks, just plastic. Ever try to peel an apple with a plastic knife… what a mess.
5. It’s a touchy feely weekend, if you don’t like to be touched, too bad.
6. It is geared towards the married woman whose husband has attended the cursillo weekend for men.
7. You MUST do childish things like drawing posters and holding them up for all to see and just like you did in the first grade. In my case, the priest that was there 100% of the time will judge the pictures like they do in the olympics, by holding up a card with your score on it. Very humiliating.
8. If you need meds, you may or may not be reminded to take them. Not was my experience.
9. You WILL NOT have your watch or phone or any kind of electronics during the weekend.

This is the minimum that one should know. If I had seen this list above, I would have realized that it wasn’t for me and would never have gone. I spent a LOT of money getting someone to watch my dogs, buying things I needed on the weekend and the fee for the retreat. I could have saved a lot of money and not have been traumatized if I had read the list above.

 

[Jeremiah1278]

As I have said over and over, I have no doubt that there are GOOD cursillos somewhere, just not here in the area where I live.
I still believe that people should get the basic information before they step foot into the cursillo. They need to understand what the process is and how it will work for them. That’s the ONLY way someone can make an informed decision to attend any kind of retreat like this.

1. You will be driven to the cursillo because we don’t want it to be easy for you to leave.
2. You will have NOT ONE MINUTE alone during the cursillo.
3. You will get up early and go to bed late and you will be deprived of sleep.
4. The food will be carbs, many many carbs. Very little protein, very little fresh veggies or fruits if any. We were not allowed to use real knives or forks, just plastic. Ever try to peel an apple with a plastic knife… what a mess.
5. It’s a touchy feely weekend, if you don’t like to be touched, too bad.
6. It is geared towards the married woman whose husband has attended the cursillo weekend for men.
7. You MUST do childish things like drawing posters and holding them up for all to see and just like you did in the first grade. In my case, the priest that was there 100% of the time will judge the pictures like they do in the olympics, by holding up a card with your score on it. Very humiliating.
8. If you need meds, you may or may not be reminded to take them. Not was my experience.
9. You WILL NOT have your watch or phone or any kind of electronics during the weekend.

This is the minimum that one should know. If I had seen this list above, I would have realized that it wasn’t for me and would never have gone. I spent a LOT of money getting someone to watch my dogs, buying things I needed on the weekend and the fee for the retreat. I could have saved a lot of money and not have been traumatized if I had read the list above.

Ya know… when you claim things like Cursillo doesn’t allow you to use silverware, you only expose how extremely unreasonable and uncharitable you are being in this entire thread. Can’t think of any alternatives? It’s a mental ploy, is it? A secret plastic ware cabal?

Another heads-up: folks check out of conversations when the other participant is totally unreasonable.

 

[maryjk]

Ya know… when you claim things like Cursillo doesn’t allow you to use silverware, you only expose how extremely unreasonable and uncharitable you are being in this entire thread. Can’t think of any alternatives? It’s a mental ploy, is it? A secret plastic ware cabal?

Another heads-up: folks check out of conversations when the other participant is totally unreasonable.

You might what to read what she wrote.

1. The food will be carbs, many many carbs. Very little protein, very little fresh veggies or fruits if any. We were not allowed to use real knives or forks, just plastic. Ever try to peel an apple with a plastic knife… what a mess.

The poster separated the two thoughts into two sentences.

One was about the food at Cursillo. The next was about her specific Cursillo.

Generally, the food will be heavy in carbs. (This might be important to someone like gh4, since she has a medical condition that would require her to limit her carbs.)

In addition, HER Cursillo didn’t use real forks and knives. Only plastic.

 

[gh4]

Ya know… when you claim things like Cursillo doesn’t allow you to use silverware, you only expose how extremely unreasonable and uncharitable you are being in this entire thread. Can’t think of any alternatives? It’s a mental ploy, is it? A secret plastic ware cabal?

Another heads-up: folks check out of conversations when the other participant is totally unreasonable.

I just thought that it was very strange that when I asked for a knife that was sharp enough to peel an apple that I was told that I couldn’t use anything but the plastic knives.

If you think I’m unreasonable, that’s fine. I’m just telling what I think would have been good information for me to have before I spent a lot of time and money going to that cursillo.

I will always answer questions honestly, anyone who asks about cursillo should have their questions answered honestly so that they can make an informed decision about attending. The “I can’t answer that, you simply have to experience that” answer is NOT acceptable. And for any retreat, if you get that answer, run for the hills!

What I will never do is to share the stories and personal information that I heard during the days that I was there.

 

[Matt241]

Ok. Let me tell you a bit about the weekend. Firstly, the talks are not done by people who may have had no training on Church Teaching. Talks aren’t about that (I’m in the process of preparing one at the moment for next year, and I’m certainly not a theologian), they are about how the Layperson lives the Christian life, with the hope of inspiring the hearers to live the same way.

We have a priest spiritual director on hand to hear confessions, read mass and he gives of few of the talks on “Spirituality”. This series of talks on Spirituality and the Sacraments are usually done by priests or religious (ie. people qualified to give talks on theological subjects).

A lot of time is spent praying in Chapel in front of the Blessed Sacrament, or before the tabernacle.

Yes, there IS a lot of “Love bombing”. I didn’t like it much at first, but once you get into the ‘spirit’ of things (yes, I’m not particularly fond of this phrase) but once you’re actually in the movement and read some of the Cursillo literature you’ll begin to see what they are so enthusiastic.

Cursillo is not a cult. It’s a charism. A charism supported by the Holy Father. I know that the present Holy Father isn’t particularly liked in some circles, but the Cursillo movement was formed in the late 1940s, when Catholicism was completely different, and it would have died out if it wasn’t for the fact that Cursillo focuses upon Christ rather than man.

I hope this answers some of your questions. If you have any more, don’t hesitate to ask.

 

[Matt241]

MY initial Cursillo experience was quite a positive one (like most of the others on here), and I am deeply, deeply sorry that you had the experience you did, gh4. I was told to not ask questions and just to trust in Christ, which I did (but, admittedly, thought was a bit strange at the time, but I thought that didn’t deviate from church teaching). I drove up in my own car, although the application form did ask if I needed a lift to the venue (which I thought was very charitable), and also asked if I’d any dietary needs that they needed to take into account (which I thought was quite pastoral and in line with things).

When I got there, they didn’t take my keys or my watch away, but asked politely if we could leave them in our rooms, and explained that the weekends were highly structured so that we needn’t have watches or phones, as they distracted (which they do). If we needed anything such as medication etc., we were to ask the Lay Director, which was alright by me.

Over the next year I joined a local reunion group of six people, and grouped regularly and attended things like Ultreyas and School of Leaders, and met some nice spiritual people. Some of the people in the group I’m in decided that we should meet up with two people who were on the weekend, but were too far away to join a regular group (we meet at the beginning of each month at the meeting rooms in St. Peter and Paul’s, Kiama).

I’ve already been on team once last year, and that was a brilliant faith-building experience, and have been asked to be on team again next year in May and present another rollo.

The Cursillo experience has given me the confidence to join other groups in my parish, to attend workshops that help me to learn more about my faith and go deeper into the scriptures (I’m currently attending a six week workshop on Exploring St. Luke’s Gospel.)

I think that some of the bad experiences on here come from Cursillos that may have been badly put together, badly organised and (sadly) hosted by people who may not have been schooled in the method that Cursillo uses on the weekends (namely a combination of sociology, psychology and spirituality); a method which, in my experience works quite well if used properly. Cursillo is meant to draw people closer to Christ and closer to each other and I’m genuinely sorry that some of the Cursillos have had the opposite effect.

 

[maryjk]

I think that some of the bad experiences on here come from Cursillos that may have been badly put together, badly organised and (sadly) hosted by people who may not have been schooled in the method that Cursillo uses on the weekends (namely a combination of sociology, psychology and spirituality); a method which, in my experience works quite well if used properly. Cursillo is meant to draw people closer to Christ and closer to each other and I’m genuinely sorry that some of the Cursillos have had the opposite effect.

So you have professional training in sociology? Or psychology? You have actual schooling in those professions? Certainly most people on the “giving team,” aren’t medical professionals.

Don’t you wonder about a group that practices “a combination of sociology, psychology and spirituality,” but uses untrained people to do it?

 

[Matt241]

So you have professional training in sociology? Or psychology? You have actual schooling in those professions? Certainly most people on the “giving team,” aren’t medical professionals.

Don’t you wonder about a group that practices “a combination of sociology, psychology and spirituality,” but uses untrained people to do it?

The groups aren’t trained in any of these things, but most people use their life experiences to give a good weekend, and life skills are more important than any professional training, don’t you think? If a person needs more psychological help, then I’d refer them to a professional, and not try to solve things that are out of my scope. That’s why we have a priest on hand to give spiritual advice of that sort. Cursillo wasn’t and isn’t set up to provide psychological or sociological help, but it does help to know how people interact, and I certainly don’t have any training in these areas, but I’ve life skills, and have seen enough of life to work out how people interact in group situations, and how friendships develop.

As for “giving team” - I haven’t heard this expression before in relation to Cursillo. It may be just a name that that particular Cursillo Team has given themselves, but isn’t in any Cursillo literature I’ve read.

 

[maryjk]

The groups aren’t trained in any of these things, but most people use their life experiences to give a good weekend, and **life skills are more important than any professional training, **don’t you think?

Um, no.

 

[Matt241]

Um, no.

Ok. Then, we should all have requisite training in psychology if a friend comes to us with a problem, training in medicine if our child comes to us with a cut. Do you see the reasoning here? Sometimes problems can be dealt with with a dose of common sense and using your experience. But, solving peoples’ mental problems isn’t what Cursillo is about. It is about drawing people closer to Christ, using a variety of methods that are applicable in a persons everyday life. Just because those methods chosen deal with elements of psychology and other things that MAY be offered professionally, but are available to everyone freely doing the course of one’s life (that’s what I mean by life experience being better than training in psychology), doesn’t mean that those methods aren’t available to people outside those professions.

 

[ExpectsMiracles]

I found a website, Questioning Cursillo (questioningcursillo.com/9.htm). It explains a lot about issues surrounding the movement.

 

[gh4]

I found a website, Questioning Cursillo (questioningcursillo.com/9.htm). It explains a lot about issues surrounding the movement.

I’ve bookmarked it and will go back and read it tomorrow or the next day. Thanks so much for posting the link.

 

[Matt241]

I also have a link to provide:

natl-cursillo.org/resources/learning.pdf

Tells you a bit more about the various lay rollos and the spiritual directors’ rollos, also available in pdf format.

 

[Matt241]

I found a website, Questioning Cursillo (questioningcursillo.com/9.htm). It explains a lot about issues surrounding the movement.

I have a question about this sentence from this website: “Subsequent experiences are not nearly so powerful, and eventually they have little or no emotional impact.” I know a few people who have been in the movement for more than 25 years, and find no evidence of this, of course, I realise this is a very small sample.

And this:

“Cursillo participants are largely wasting their time and their lives, chasing after an elusive emotional experience, when we are called to take up our cross and follow Christ into the serious service of discipleship.”

I’ve found that, since Cursillo, my evangelic efforts have doubled, and I’m speaking more and more about Christ to the people in my workplace, to the people in my church. This isn’t about “grooming” people for weekends, it’s about telling people about the love of God. Exactly the apostolic work to which we all are called.

I still get a “kick” - if you can call it that (and I don’t, hence the quotation marks), out of mass attendance, as a matter-of-fact, it’s helped me increase my faith, and a few of the men on the Cursillo weekend have been approached by their parish priests to become acolytes (I’m already an acolyte, and had been one for a while before being invited along to a Cursillo weekend.)