Dating Advice: Why did God allow me to meet him?

[chevalier]

Cast your net elsewhere. There exist men who are either on the same page with you or ready to respect where you are.

And no, it’s not wrong to be uninterested in casual dating. (Although it would be odd to jump on a fast-track to marriage right away, with big words and big promises that aren’t warranted.)

 

[LoveJesus13]

If he wants to make money and have fun with his mates…so what? He’s not selfish, that’s how he wants to live his life. Furthermore, looking at other women is hardly the mark of a cheater…

As stated in Matthew 6:24, you can’t serve 2 masters. How can you serve God if you’re into putting $$, partying, etc… above God?! I say it’s selfish because a relationship consists of 3: you, your partner/spouse and God- he only had himself. And as far cheating, I was told that in MOST cases, the saying applies that “Once a cheater always a cheater.” That is what I am going by.

 

[EasterJoy]

As stated in Matthew 6:24, you can’t serve 2 masters. How can you serve God if you’re into putting $$, partying, etc… above God?! I say it’s selfish because a relationship consists of 3: you, your partner/spouse and God- he only had himself. And as far cheating, I was told that in MOST cases, the saying applies that “Once a cheater always a cheater.” That is what I am going by.

A fellow who has learned his lesson and amended his life will show it. Until there is something more than lip service, though, you’re right to be wary about whether or not a different mode of operation is a realistic expectation. Past behavior is not an infallible predictor of future behavior, but it is reasonable to expect that it is a good one unless something substantial is changing the path of the past.

I think you want very different things, so it is better to let this fellow go. I hope you find someone who shares your vision of marriage, because there are certainly a lot of Catholic men out there wondering if they’ll ever meet a woman to marry who thinks as you do.

 

[Ruthie_again]

Ruthie and EasterJoy, thanks, I will try to do that. But how do you know God’s will?

I wish I knew. But it starts with doing the things we know are His will – living chastely, going to confession and Mass, doing what we can to care for those less fortunate. Learning what the Church teaches, and living by it. Using the talents we have to serve Him. Having a prayer life. Fighting sin in our selves.

Thank you for the prayers. I was experiencing a “dark night of the soul” and I got help and peace a few days ago. Coincidence? I doubt it! Now, ‘scuse me while I go pray the Divine Mercy chaplet!

 

[Bezant]

And as far cheating, I was told that in MOST cases, the saying applies that “Once a cheater always a cheater.” That is what I am going by.

I think it’s better to look at every case situationally.

As stated in Matthew 6:24, you can’t serve 2 masters. How can you serve God if you’re into putting $$, partying, etc… above God?! I say it’s selfish because a relationship consists of 3: you, your partner/spouse and God- he only had himself.

That’s what you want in a relationship. It’s your job to find someone who already makes time for God.

J had different expectations from yours. He wasn’t “selfish” because he didn’t change his views.

 

[LoveJesus13]

I think it’s better to look at every case situationally.

That’s what you want in a relationship. It’s your job to find someone who already makes time for God.

J had different expectations from yours. He wasn’t “selfish” because he didn’t change his views.

OK Bezant, that’s not an expectation but what scripture says. I think God would agree that if you don’t put Him as a top priority then you’re more self-serving than serving God. Like it says in Matthew: “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.” That’s your opinion and my opinion is to follow scripture.

 

[LoveJesus13]

A fellow who has learned his lesson and amended his life will show it. Until there is something more than lip service, though, you’re right to be wary about whether or not a different mode of operation is a realistic expectation. Past behavior is not an infallible predictor of future behavior, but it is reasonable to expect that it is a good one unless something substantial is changing the path of the past.

I think you want very different things, so it is better to let this fellow go. I hope you find someone who shares your vision of marriage, because there are certainly a lot of Catholic men out there wondering if they’ll ever meet a woman to marry who thinks as you do.

Thank you EasterJoy, you are right his actions would’ve shown otherwise. Please keep me in your prayers as I will do the same for you, God bless

 

[LoveJesus13]

I wish I knew. But it starts with doing the things we know are His will – living chastely, going to confession and Mass, doing what we can to care for those less fortunate. Learning what the Church teaches, and living by it. Using the talents we have to serve Him. Having a prayer life. Fighting sin in our selves.

Thank you for the prayers. I was experiencing a “dark night of the soul” and I got help and peace a few days ago. Coincidence? I doubt it! Now, ‘scuse me while I go pray the Divine Mercy chaplet!

Thanks Ruthie, and Amen to getting peace a few days ago!! I know if we truly trust in the Lord, He will help us OUT of these “dark night of the soul” moments. The Divine Mercy Chaplet is wonderful, I prayed it today too. Take care

And Thank you to ALL for the positive, supportive and encouraging words! You are all helping me move on and keep God as my focus. You have all been in my prayers today when I attended mass. God bless