Dating & age gaps... old subject, I know!

[Hoosier_Daddy]

Well, I tried to call my girlfriend my “Woman” and she told me that in Mexico when a unmarried man calls his girlfriend his “Mujer” or “Woman” it means that they are having sex. I was not aware of this. I later confirmed this by asking a few other Mexicans (I am Mexican American several generations over so I do not know a lot of things like that about Mexico) So while I kind of think there should be a better word than “Boyfriend or girlfriend” I think I will stick with that because it is safe frankly. “Partner” or “significant other” does sound like a co-habitating or gay couple or something.

Lol. Hey, this is my woman…
Or hey, let me introduce you to my ole lady…

 

[FunkyKikuchiyo]

Ladyfriend is what people in the nursing home would use!!!

I know I’m older than this nice lady, but am I really THAT much older?!

 

[revert_jen]

I’m in my 50’s and if there was a man I was interested in, the first thing I would do is google him. I don’t think it’s creepy at all. Why not utilize a source of information?

For the same reason that I wouldn’t hire a private investigator to vet someone I wanted to date. Because it would be information that I knew about him secretly, that he didn’t know I had, and because if he didn’t do the same to me, it would be an imbalance in the relationship. Because in the same situation, I would like to choose at what point in the relationship I would like to release information about myself, and to allow him to do the same.

But that’s just me–I’m a private person. (So consequently, the only information about me available through google is information that has been gathered and published without my consent by public records search companies.)

–Jen

 

[FunkyKikuchiyo]

For the same reason that I wouldn’t hire a private investigator to vet someone I wanted to date. Because it would be information that I knew about him secretly, that he didn’t know I had, and because if he didn’t do the same to me, it would be an imbalance in the relationship. Because in the same situation, I would like to choose at what point in the relationship I would like to release information about myself, and to allow him to do the same.

But that’s just me–I’m a private person. (So consequently, the only information about me available through google is information that has been gathered and published without my consent by public records search companies.)

–Jen

I see where you’re coming from Jen, but not all online researching is the same. The way I see it, digging deep online is like the private investigator, a quick google to see what social media sites they’re active in (bear in mind that all of that is volunteered information) is more like looking someone up in a phone book. It is readily available information that the person KNOWS is available.

Now, if I had gone to some of the sites that give background checks, court records and so forth, paid the whatever introductory fee, and got big reports on her… super creepy.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

For the same reason that I wouldn’t hire a private investigator to vet someone I wanted to date. Because it would be information that I knew about him secretly, that he didn’t know I had, and because if he didn’t do the same to me, it would be an imbalance in the relationship. Because in the same situation, I would like to choose at what point in the relationship I would like to release information about myself, and to allow him to do the same.

But that’s just me–I’m a private person. (So consequently, the only information about me available through google is information that has been gathered and published without my consent by public records search companies.)

–Jen

A quick Google and a glance at some social media is not finding " private things" In fact it’s foolish and reckless NOT to do!

 

[Zzyzx_Road]

It’s okay to do quick Google searches. On the other hand, I like my privacy so I won’t be found on any social media except LinkedIn and that is just for professional exposure only. So not much will be found about me and it won’t bother me if I find that a date is the same way. Heck I’ll like that about her as it will tell me she isn’t caught up in social media either.

Regarding age gaps: it’s relative and it depends on the couple. 22 and 16 can definitely raise eyebrows, but 27 and 21 is no big deal and this can move wider to some extent for older couples.