A
Allegra
Guest
My point is that there is a reason they ask and it’s because daycares are germ factories and infants have not fully developed their immune systems.
- Status
A
Allegra
Guest
Newborns in every country generally sleep a lot. I had no trouble finding time to shower with my first. It was harder when I had my second and I had to keep my first from killing my second every time I looked away for a minute. (And when I say “killing”, I mean loving him to death in an obsessive big sister way.)
C
ConfusedLucy
Guest
I think I must come from a family of bad sleepers.
D
DisorientingSneeze
Guest
All my babies have been bad sleepers and I had to return to work with the first three around 3 months each time. You just function the same way your coworkers with insomnia do… the best you can.
T
TheLittleLady
Guest
Driving while sleep deprived is as dangerous as driving while drunk. Sleep deprivation is used as torture!
Insomnia is a medical condition, a physician can help those people to lead productive lives.
Sleep deprived new parents, please, reach out to family and friends. Let someone come and do baby duty or watching kids duty or housecleaning, something that lets you get some sleep!
Insomnia is a medical condition, a physician can help those people to lead productive lives.
Sleep deprived new parents, please, reach out to family and friends. Let someone come and do baby duty or watching kids duty or housecleaning, something that lets you get some sleep!
It seems that you would prefer to raise your kids by yourself.
Is it possible? And if not, why?
Being a SAHM will cut the home from half the money. But you will save a lot from childcare, worked clothes, formula, or bottle and materials if you will give her your milk, perhaps a second car, gazoline, inassurances, more costy meals…
You will have your own schedules, or no schedules, and baby too. No pression to have your child take this and this food with on this quantities, strict rests times without mommy and her breasts.
It can be a transition too until all your children go to school.
It is possible that you and husband have not think a lot before marriage, or you simply change your mind. It is not a shame to change when the child is here. Nobody can say for sure if she want to come back to work after the baby is put in her arms. It is not something that need to be decided for sure before marriage!
So, what do really do?
What is it possible to do?
What thinks do you accept to sacrified? (there will be in all choices!)
What is your husband’s opinion?
Is it possible? And if not, why?
Being a SAHM will cut the home from half the money. But you will save a lot from childcare, worked clothes, formula, or bottle and materials if you will give her your milk, perhaps a second car, gazoline, inassurances, more costy meals…
You will have your own schedules, or no schedules, and baby too. No pression to have your child take this and this food with on this quantities, strict rests times without mommy and her breasts.
It can be a transition too until all your children go to school.
It is possible that you and husband have not think a lot before marriage, or you simply change your mind. It is not a shame to change when the child is here. Nobody can say for sure if she want to come back to work after the baby is put in her arms. It is not something that need to be decided for sure before marriage!
So, what do really do?
What is it possible to do?
What thinks do you accept to sacrified? (there will be in all choices!)
What is your husband’s opinion?
C
ConfusedLucy
Guest
I really feel for people in that situation, its hard enough when you aren’t working.
It’s interesting that the US has higher breastfeeding than the UK despite not having maternity leave.
It’s interesting that the US has higher breastfeeding than the UK despite not having maternity leave.
J
JanetF
Guest
IIRC, when my daughter was a baby, her dad and I would tag team. She would wake at 5:30, I would feed her, then put her back in her crib, her dad was still home to take care of her while I showered and got ready for work. Once out of the shower, he’d leave for work and then I’d take care of drop off. In the evenings, I’d pick up, bring her home feed her, do limited chores, bed time at 8-9:00. Now I have to admit, she was a great sleeper! Additionally, we only had one child, so that made things easier in some ways.
Caveat: it’s been 20 years so my memory may be a little faulty
Last edited:
J
JanetF
Guest
Just want to add, Working Moms ARE raising their children! They just have a few more people helping them with the task.
C
ConfusedLucy
Guest
I’m guessing some sort of schedule would be needed. I take my hat off to those who managed to go to work while responsible for a small baby.
P
pensmama87
Guest
After my second was born, I was able to bring him to work with me for the first six months or so, which was really helpful. I worked in an office and could do almost everything I needed to while wearing him in a sling or letting him sleep by my desk.
Sounds like what I do at work every day.
Luckily my co-workers are very kind about letting me take my naps… : )
Last edited:
It’s not representative of my experience and of many mothers I know.
Yes, babies sleeps a lot, but many with micro-sleep (for eg after a feeding) but quickly awake.
So, no, no time to shower or any other thing.
A baby is not a good or a bad sleeper. They generally take all the sleep they need!
You said that just because they have not or socialized hours of sleep, which is perfectly normal for a 3 mouths-old.
What is torture is the social injunction for mothers to go to work so early, with so lack of sleep themselves.
What help a lot of mothers is co sleeping, or side-sleeping. Or to have the baby in the same bedroom the night. And rest with baby when they return from their work. It is not something that always planned, but, an empirical decision.
There may be different factors.
First, the social consideration of breatfeding and practical help to mothers since the birth by hospital, professionals and support of direct relatives.
Maternity leave help too, but not enough. In France, we have also maternity leave, but very short. And breastfeeding rate are low too past the first mounth. (but a little better than in UK, I think). A longer one, or the possibility to legally take time off for mounths is more effective.
For workings mothers, the respect on workplaces of the international standards to permits mothers to breatsfeed babies on their workplace, or pump milk in decent manner.
And a lot of stay at home mothers make breatfeeding rate easier, if this feding it is the cultural norm too.
You said that just because they have not or socialized hours of sleep, which is perfectly normal for a 3 mouths-old.
What is torture is the social injunction for mothers to go to work so early, with so lack of sleep themselves.
What help a lot of mothers is co sleeping, or side-sleeping. Or to have the baby in the same bedroom the night. And rest with baby when they return from their work. It is not something that always planned, but, an empirical decision.
Yes…
There may be different factors.
First, the social consideration of breatfeding and practical help to mothers since the birth by hospital, professionals and support of direct relatives.
Maternity leave help too, but not enough. In France, we have also maternity leave, but very short. And breastfeeding rate are low too past the first mounth. (but a little better than in UK, I think). A longer one, or the possibility to legally take time off for mounths is more effective.
For workings mothers, the respect on workplaces of the international standards to permits mothers to breatsfeed babies on their workplace, or pump milk in decent manner.
And a lot of stay at home mothers make breatfeeding rate easier, if this feding it is the cultural norm too.
Last edited:
A
Allegra
Guest
I don’t think anyone was meaning to imply moral culpability when describing an infant as a “good or bad sleeper”. The term “good sleeper” tends to be used to describe a baby who sleeps well and at predictable intervals of time, maybe even for six or more hours at night. No one’s trying to say that such a baby is morally superior to other babies.
What i said, is not moral superior. Just that it is unatural for a small baby to sleep six or more hours at night. Because they need more frequent feedings.
And sorry, on medical language, but when se said that a baby “make his night” (or more exacltly his parent’s night), it’s 5 hours consecutively. And it’s not happen one average before 6 mounths. And for many, they are much more older.
And sorry, on medical language, but when se said that a baby “make his night” (or more exacltly his parent’s night), it’s 5 hours consecutively. And it’s not happen one average before 6 mounths. And for many, they are much more older.
A
Allegra
Guest
I don’t know about “unnatural”, but it certainly is rare for a newborn to sleep six hours at night. Mine usually went for about four at a time, but in between feedings, they slept, especially during the day. Four hours might not be the best night’s sleep, but it’s surely enough to get a quick shower in!
Yes, it is rare, because of “natural reasons”. What I mean by “natural” is reasons that permits them to survive, outside our modern society: they awake to be feed (breastmilk is disgest in less than one hour). And there are others hypothesis that are advanced on antropology, such as they need to be awake to be sure that their mother supervised them, as they are completely hepless versus others mammals. They are not created to let alone many hours in a single bed in a single room.
Contrary to you, my daughter sleep a little time, for eg 20 minutes, between the feedings, but mostly in my arms. When she was little, she cannot sleep more than one hour 30 or 2 hours consecutive. And was in my arms for 1 hour, I think at every feeding…
So, no time, to sleep, and no time to have a shower, or to unravel my hairs.
The only thing that can do, is to make a rest with her, or to take her in a scarf carrier, or I fall asleep when she was in my arms.
If I let her in another person’s arms just to do that, she cried until she is at my breasts.
Contrary to you, my daughter sleep a little time, for eg 20 minutes, between the feedings, but mostly in my arms. When she was little, she cannot sleep more than one hour 30 or 2 hours consecutive. And was in my arms for 1 hour, I think at every feeding…
So, no time, to sleep, and no time to have a shower, or to unravel my hairs.
The only thing that can do, is to make a rest with her, or to take her in a scarf carrier, or I fall asleep when she was in my arms.
If I let her in another person’s arms just to do that, she cried until she is at my breasts.
Last edited:
P
pensmama87
Guest
One of mine was like this, but the other three were not. There are some strategies one can use to improve infant sleep, but they can be hard to learn and implement when you’re already sleep deprived. Having a strong community support system helps a lot, too.
D
dochawk
Guest
All of ours slept through once they hit ten pounds.
And they all probably would have been that at birth but three were five weeks early (including the twins) and the fourth was four weeks early . . . (one of the twins was 6-11 at five weeks early . . .)
hawk
- Status