Deacons and Deacons to be

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I know this isn’t the right way to look at a vocation, but it occurs to be over and over again. I mean no offense by this question, but do the Deacons here feel that their ministries are more effective, or beneficial, due to the fact that they are ordained?

Specifically, I have been thinking about becoming a Deacon. As part of my discernment, I decided to sign up for some ministries in our church, like taking Communion to people in the Hospital, and RCIA and so on. Now, I can do those things as a lay person. And if I become a Deacon, I can still do them (and in some cases, that might be more appropriate for a Deacon). But is it better to be done by a Deacon? Beyond the education, or the ability to perform additional parts of the rite (if there are, I honestly haven’t checked), does the ordination itself confer benefits on the people receiving the ministry?

I hope that makes sense. Again, I don’t mean to imply that Deacons aren’t valuable. I think the liturgical aspects of the Deaconate are wonderful, but I’m wondering if Holy Orders carries some change or extra … something … even in ministries or activities open to the laity.

Thanks
 
BenFischer said:
I know this isn’t the right way to look at a vocation, but it occurs to be over and over again. I mean no offense by this question, but do the Deacons here feel that their ministries are more effective, or beneficial, due to the fact that they are ordained?

Specifically, I have been thinking about becoming a Deacon. As part of my discernment, I decided to sign up for some ministries in our church, like taking Communion to people in the Hospital, and RCIA and so on. Now, I can do those things as a lay person. And if I become a Deacon, I can still do them (and in some cases, that might be more appropriate for a Deacon). But is it better to be done by a Deacon? Beyond the education, or the ability to perform additional parts of the rite (if there are, I honestly haven’t checked), does the ordination itself confer benefits on the people receiving the ministry?

I hope that makes sense. Again, I don’t mean to imply that Deacons aren’t valuable. I think the liturgical aspects of the Deaconate are wonderful, but I’m wondering if Holy Orders carries some change or extra … something … even in ministries or activities open to the laity.

Thanks
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Yes, your ministry will be more effective as you will have at ordination the power of orders conferred you. It confers an indellible mark upon your soul. You receive special grace through this sacrament, which if cooperated with, will give you a much more effective ministry. Yes, you can continue bringing Communion to the sick but the difference is that you will be an ordinary minister of the Eucharist instead of an extraordinary minister of the Eucharist. You will be a regular minister of baptize, do weddings and preside at funerals. You will be the minister of the Gospel. Through ordination, you become of the priesthood of Jesus. There are three ranks in Holy Orders, each requiring ordination. The fullness or Holy Orders belongs to the Bishop, who can administer all the sacraments. then comes the priest who can administer the sacraments, except ordain priests and bishops, but who with the bishops permission, can confer confirmation. Then is the deacon. The lowest in Holy Orders. As deacon you have authority to do those things described above. The diaconate is a ministry of service. In fact that is what “diaconi” means in Greek, i.e., servant. t is a most fulfilling vocation.
Prayers & blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
That’s pretty much what we did in Detroit.

The best part about it is you can tell people that you are Certifiably Sane and have the paperwork to prove it :cool:
 
Last night I went to the Chancery to submit my formal application for the class of 2013.
The frustrating part is to get paperwork from Italy in a timely manner. I still need to get the transcripts for my doctor degree. That is an unusual request for the Italian system and try to get the Italian bureaucracy to move fast during the summer. You really have to trust in the Divine Providence.
 
I worry about becoming an absentee dad if ordained. My youngest is 3 and the new diaconate formation isn’t expected to begin until after the current formation are ordained. First we must attend the 2 year program together which will be fun for us. Our oldest will turn 14 in the near future and had it not been for Father we may not have used him to attend RCIA last year.

My wife’s conversion also makes this so much easier and she’s supportive of my vocation too. We are very active in different ways. Since she bacame ill with dizzy spells I had to back off for a little while. But we are in the middle of career changed to teach to give more time off the minitstry. Public school though. Our large population of Hispanics may make this interesting though. Many if not most are Catholic.
 
My archdiocese requires that we put in between 8 to 10 hours a week. That said, we were also instructed that family obligations and duties come first. Most pastors are extremely understanding where family concerns are involved.
Prayers & blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
That’s not nearly as time consuming as I’d expet. Our family life is embedded in parish life. I’d personally like to get involved in marriage preparation classes. They were hoping we’d take over some of the ministry back then. But family issues kept us from entering into that ministry. Our children need to be older since we don’t have family to help watch the kids. Our little ones are really active…hand full.

But teaching would free up more time to be more active in parish life. Keep in mind that I’m giving up engineering as a career and my wife is giving up a legal profession as well but only after coming home for a while first. And we both love working with kids and teach CCD. As a family we are already engaged in several ministries on top of that. Pro-life, EMHC, Altar Serving, Pro-Life, RCIA, Knights, Oratory, Priest Support, Vocation awareness, youth group, and anything we can get into it seems. We’ve started a ministry to the unknown elderly. I’d say mass if Father would let me.😉 That’s an inside joke dealing with our former Protestant faith that I’ll tell you about one day [dumb or rediculous would be better]. I’m getting geared up for helping a friend [priest - from my seminary days - a friend and sparring buddy] out with the next round [201?] at World Youth Day and next summer mission work in Granada hopefully an annual affair. We’re very devoted to lots of prayer time: LOTH, Rosary, nightly bible study kid level, Divine Mercy, personal prayer, oratory. If he doesn’t watch it I may have to move to his diocese.
 
It sounds as though you have an extremely active ministry in front of you right now. You can still be involved with all these as a deacon. The advantage would be that you would have the sacramental grace received through Holy Orders to assist you in all of this. That alone could greatly strengthen your ministry. I too was very active before ordination. While I do not do as much now, I can see a difference in the quality and efficaciousness of what I do as being much greater. After all, sanctifying grace is nothing less than a participation in the divinity of God himself. The sacramental participation is where you will see a difference.
Prayers & Blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
Well, this is a great topic for me…

My story:

I am seventeen. I think I see myself as being a deacon someday. I want to get married and have children. I am new to the whole idea of being a deacon because for the first 14 years of my life, my rural parish never had one. Is it okay to want to be a deacon, but not want to be one until you have gotten married (and possible retired)… so you know, you can consumate and have kids? I want to raise a family so badly! I also want to be able to share my spirituality and Christ’s love to the masses. I love giving speeches and having spiritual conversations (especially with my protestant friends! I’ve gotten three of them to come to mass!). The deaconate seems like the perfect fit for my calling.

Any comments? Guidance?
 
The norms at present are that a man must be at least 34 before he can be ordained a deacon. If he is single when ordained, he cannot get married. He he is married, he lives a normal married life with his wife and family just as does any other married man. If married, both you and your wife will be interviewed and you need her permission to be ordained. If your children are old enough, they too will be interviewed. So, it is perfectly normal and OK to want to be married, have a family and be a deacon. The only change in your married life will be that your wife is now married to a member of the clergy. The spiritual rewards are great. Do not abandon your desire, but pray for its fulfillment. You will remain in my prayers
Prayers & blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
vocatio said:
I worry about becoming an absentee dad if ordained. My youngest is 3 and the new diaconate formation isn’t expected to begin until after the current formation are ordained. First we must attend the 2 year program together which will be fun for us. Our oldest will turn 14 in the near future and had it not been for Father we may not have used him to attend RCIA last year. .
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I’m in formation, so while I’ve not had a Diaconal ministry yet, I have had several of the summer service projects.

My recommendation is to involve the kids as much as possible. My first summer minsitry was nursing home visits. That is a GREAT ministry to have when you have kids. We would make it a family event and stop by and visit the elderly, and they LOVED It.

I have a son ( 9) and four daughters ( 8, 5, 3, 1.5). One of the ladies there remarked wistfully that she had always wanted a little girl, she had 3 sons and now has 5 grandsons. No girls in the whole bunch. She said that, as a little girl herself, she had imagined having tea parties with her daughters. So the following week, I brought in tea bags, a hot pot, cups and dolls, and my girls had a tea party with her.

My second service ministry was with the poor, at an inner city Catholic run food center. Each week, I brought the kids down to pack up boxes of food for distrubtion, or sort donated clothes by size.

I learned a lot of this from my dad, who is a physician. I see a lot of paralles with the diaconate and the medical profession. My dad worked a lot of hours, including evening hours every Tues and Thurs. Doctors don’t get paid vacation, so we didn’t take many family vacations.

But I was invovled in my dad’s work. When he was on call on the weekends, and had to make rounds at the hospital ( checking on the patients from the practice he shared with several other doctors) he would bring us. He would tell us that Mrs. So-and-so had no one to visit her, so we would spend time visiting with patients while he went on his rounds.

That involved us in my father’s work, made us feel connected to the great work he was doing, and gave me a great example of service.

Now, not all ministries are suited for bringing kids ( berevement ministry, prison work), but a Deacon has some choice in where he adds to the Church.
 
I can understand your delima. As I am in formation as well my wife and I have learned not to make any plans until we find out completely what is in store for us. Our director tells us that deacons must be flexable and when a conflict arrises, to work the problem. Both are good advice with a great deal of truth behind them.
Hang in there.

Peace,
FAB
 
Brendan said:
I’m in formation, so while I’ve not had a Diaconal ministry yet, I have had several of the summer service projects.

My recommendation is to involve the kids as much as possible. My first summer minsitry was nursing home visits. That is a GREAT ministry to have when you have kids. We would make it a family event and stop by and visit the elderly, and they LOVED It.
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We are already doing that. My concerns are just anxiety based. If my wife and I go from our current status to teaching we will have more time for ministry. That’s the plan. My wife started a ministry under Peace and Justice that involves visiting elderly that have no family. I idea is to expose the children to real life. Since my parents have long gone and my wife’s dad passed away in 2004, we only have her mom left who does not travel much and lives out of state. This gives our children to serve and be aroudn elderly folks that teaches them stages of life. It’s rather healthy for them.

I’m planning on a mission trip next summer with a fried, a priest in a different state. I am planning to take my oldest along. As the 2 younger children grow up I plan to do the same. It’s really bazaar. Not one of them will be in undergraduate school at the same time unless something holds one back.

Our pastor told me something in confession which concerns me. He told me that sometimes the Hold Spirit tells us to stand still. That was strange to say to me since he already recommended I consider the diaaconate. I suspect its the family struggle my wife is working through with her mother. Mom doesn’t know we’re Catholic and will flip once she finds out. She already thinks will hellbound for attending a non-denomination church we went to some time back. We never told her of our conversion. My wife’s choice. This is teaching our children charity. Mom is 82 with an 8th grade education. She’s lived a simple life and knows nothing else.

Woohooo! I just received a call from my wife saying that her stressfull on-th-spot visit with her sisters for a week with mom is canceled. We might have a great summer after all. We prefer to visit on Friday and come back Saturday night to avoid the church conflict and 50 questions thing of why we didn’t participate with the “Lord’s Supper” - cracker and grape juice. So far God’s protected her…
 
vocatio said:
We are already doing that. My concerns are just anxiety based. If my wife and I go from our current status to teaching we will have more time for ministry. …
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Dear vocatio:

When your pastor is telling you is good advice, the Holy Spirit is telling you to stand still. The reason is not to discourage you from the Diaconate, but ot be able to listen to what God is calling you to do.
Your life sounds hectic and it will not change if you go into formation. Part of the process is to discern if serving the church as a deacon is for you. It is not done in a vacumn, since your wife is part of the process as well as your children. The church will also look at you closely as well. Many men, once they start the process find that the life of a deacon is not for them. The process, if you enter into it, will change you and the spirit will give you the strength you need to overcome all obstacles, even mom.
There are a number of men in my class who are converts and who have family members that as you said flipped when they went into formation for the diaconate. They pray for their relative but the objections do not deter them from persuing this vocation.
When the young man asked Jesus what he must do to go to heaven, Jesus told him he must give up everthing and follow him. In a very real sense, this has happened to me in formation. Although I haven’t had to sell all my poossessions, I have changed and given up attitudes and held beliefs that would keep me from doing the work of Jesus. The opinions of others that may be against me are of no matter, since I know were my heart is and the Holy Spirt gives me his graces daily. The same I am certain will be the same for you.

Peace,
FAB
 
Hi everyone!

I’m 36 years old, married (happier everyday) for 14 years, with two children aged 13 and 10. I most definitely feel called to the Diaconate, and believe that I would easily obtain the endorsement or sponsorship of my pastor.

My only question right now is one of timing. In our diocese, the formation program is 5 years. That is about perfect as I see it – meaning that by the time I would conceivable be ordained, I would no longer have small children.

Can anyone tell me what kind of time commitment that the formation program presents? I understand that our program requires monthly classes at seminary, but I’m unsure of the time commitment besides that.

Thanks, and God bless you all!
 
FAB said:
Dear vocatio:

When your pastor is telling you is good advice, the Holy Spirit is telling you to stand still. The reason is not to discourage you from the Diaconate, but ot be able to listen to what God is calling you to do.

Your life sounds hectic and it will not change if you go into formation. Part of the process is to discern if serving the church as a deacon is for you. It is not done in a vacumn, since your wife is part of the process as well as your children. The church will also look at you closely as well.
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I took Father’s statement to refer to the fact that my wife’s stressed about making a transition into teaching. We’ve been married for 19 years now and have experience many losses up until now. God has been point towards and opening doors very clearly pointing in this direction. Who am I to deny what God wants from me? I’ve done that already and that’s what lead to the hectic life. Now that I’ve returned to discerning a vocation to the clergy my life has become much less hectic. It’s strange. Having children is always hectic. Making a career change is always hectic. Running from abusive Protestants is hectic. So yes. Life’s bit hectic. But it gets better all the time. I can’t help but wonder if the apostles lives were hectic. I bet they’re lives were very hectic. It’s not the fact that you life is hectic but rather how you handle it. Trusting God is very important.

I’ve been through this process before when I was accepted into the seminary to become a priest. Only now, the process involves my wife and children. Fortunately my wife is used to being scrutinized because she is the daughter of an elder/bishop and sister of 2 preachers. She handles herself well. Her anxiety is more cathartic. There is such a thing as possitive stress. It wipes you out as well, but with time makes things much easiser. That is the stage we’re in right now. She feels like she’s alive now that she’s Catholic. She’s rediscovering herself. She’s writing poetry, singing, teaching, and all the things she used to love. Catholicism fits her well. She’s a very spiritual woman ans spends much time in prayer now. When we first married I shocked her because I knelt at the bed to pray. It startled her.

Since I’m close to a government retirement teaching makes sense. I can carry my retirment to it. I’ve taught. It was what I set out to be but our first son forced me to abandon it to support the family. Teaching’s what I’ve always wanted to do since we married. It would give us time to do more of the things we love to do. Oh the freedom.

We went through RCIA together and really loved beging together through the process. Now, we’re planning of being part of the next stage of ministry that is required before the diacaonte formation but also partly required for certification teaching in CCD. So we have at least 2 more years to see where we’re going. God’s will be done. Either way we will continue to become more involved with time.

Thanks for your response.
 
JoeSchmeau said:
Can anyone tell me what kind of time commitment that the formation program presents? I understand that our program requires monthly classes at seminary, but I’m unsure of the time commitment besides that.
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Most programs I am aware of require weekly, not monthly classes. You may want to check into this further.
Prayers & blessings
Deacon Ed B
 
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