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I’ve been having problems lately trying to get along with my father. I am worried about him. He overworks himself (far more than a man should at his age), has severe anger issues, and hates God. He doesn’t go to Mass at all or Confession. I know this is due in part because he works so much (and if he didn’t work, would not keep the house), but even if he were semi-retired, I already know he would not make an effort to go to Mass.
He grew up in a somewhat abusive background; his parents would always send him and his sister to church together. The parents never went to church services with their kids (they are Protestant, I think of Baptist background). My father became Catholic when he married my mom and went to Mass with us when we were younger. Basically, he and his sister did not have a happy childhood. They have severe health and mental issues it seems from this unhappy childhood.
I am the only one in my family who tries to regularly attend Mass (I don’t really have a car). My mom comes with me, but she says “God doesn’t do anything for me. I don’t know why I bother coming with you.” Sometimes I feel like I am the only one who has this problem, but I know I don’t. I am trying so hard to get out of the house but I can’t do that because I can’t find a full-time, career-related job yet. I’m stuck at home. I help out the best I can when I don’t work part-time.
I am constantly surrounded by those who are unhappy and extremely angry. I am very different from my father and when he has his anger outbursts, I stay away from him. He really can say hurtful things to people when he is this way. Obviously, I will confront him and counter the things he says to me, sometimes on a level that he doesn’t expect. He claims there is nothing wrong with him (that he doesn’t have anger management issues) and that he is the “sanest person he knows.” This is complete and utter denial to me. He doesn’t go to the doctor ever and doesn’t take medication for his anger outbursts. How can anyone live in complete denial like this?
I guess I just don’t know what to do. I want him to stop hating God and blaming people for his anger issues. It is walking on thin ice whenever I’m around him, so much so that I avoid him whenever I can. I have been praying for him to keep his job (and hope he doesn’t drop dead from overworking himself to death, which I greatly fear) and health, and hope he indeed realizes that there is something wrong with the way he treats people. I don’t know if there is anything else I can do for him.
He grew up in a somewhat abusive background; his parents would always send him and his sister to church together. The parents never went to church services with their kids (they are Protestant, I think of Baptist background). My father became Catholic when he married my mom and went to Mass with us when we were younger. Basically, he and his sister did not have a happy childhood. They have severe health and mental issues it seems from this unhappy childhood.
I am the only one in my family who tries to regularly attend Mass (I don’t really have a car). My mom comes with me, but she says “God doesn’t do anything for me. I don’t know why I bother coming with you.” Sometimes I feel like I am the only one who has this problem, but I know I don’t. I am trying so hard to get out of the house but I can’t do that because I can’t find a full-time, career-related job yet. I’m stuck at home. I help out the best I can when I don’t work part-time.
I am constantly surrounded by those who are unhappy and extremely angry. I am very different from my father and when he has his anger outbursts, I stay away from him. He really can say hurtful things to people when he is this way. Obviously, I will confront him and counter the things he says to me, sometimes on a level that he doesn’t expect. He claims there is nothing wrong with him (that he doesn’t have anger management issues) and that he is the “sanest person he knows.” This is complete and utter denial to me. He doesn’t go to the doctor ever and doesn’t take medication for his anger outbursts. How can anyone live in complete denial like this?
I guess I just don’t know what to do. I want him to stop hating God and blaming people for his anger issues. It is walking on thin ice whenever I’m around him, so much so that I avoid him whenever I can. I have been praying for him to keep his job (and hope he doesn’t drop dead from overworking himself to death, which I greatly fear) and health, and hope he indeed realizes that there is something wrong with the way he treats people. I don’t know if there is anything else I can do for him.
