Defending my decision to convert

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After much consideration, I told the husband that I wanted to cancel the meeting. It’s not that I’m wanting to avoid the issue, but I’d like more time to prepare for this type of conversation. Once I feel more prepared, I’d be willing to sit down with any of them and have a friendly debate. It’s not fair for anybody to expect me to do that this early in the process.

At any rate, I’m relieved. 🙂
 
HeatherWB said:
As a matter of fact, I have read Rome Sweet Home. One of the big differences between them and us is that the hubs is a bit chauvinistic and considers himself the spiritual leader of the home. He has made it clear that he will not participate in any of it with me and that would include reading anything pro-Catholic that I might give him.

Nobody can make me do anything I don’t want to do.
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I’m a former member of the churches of Christ as well. I was finally received into the Church this year as a matter of fact.

I know from my situation how hard it can be. It especially is hard for me to try and be the spiritual leader of my household when my wife and I are on different pages. Stay strong in the faith and, like you said, don’t let anybody make you do something you don’t want to do.

Just know that much of the resistance can come from the fact he may not understand Catholicism or it may seem so completely foreign. We you get down to it, most of the stuff you’re taught at least in conservative Protestant churches is the exact opposite of Catholic teachings. It’s hard to get over that hump. Same thing goes for the elder and his wife I’m sure.

My wife has gradually warmed up to Catholicism and I can tell she is starting to listen when I say things about it rather than just blocking it out. I don’t know what your situation will be like, but keep going to Mass (daily if it’s possible!) and praying the Rosary. You’ll be in my prayers.
 
I think you are wise in your decision to not talk to the elder and his wife just yet. I want to quickly recommend another great book, (I love to read, can you tell?) also by Scott Hahn. It’s called, Reasons to Believe: How to Understand, Explain, and Defend the Catholic Faith. This might help arm you with the correct teachings of our Faith, because the fact is that the majority of things that people take issue with, are due to misunderstandings. I’m reminded of a quote by Archbishop Fulton Sheen: “There are not a hundred people in America who hate the Catholic Church. There are millions of people who hate what they wrongly believe to be the Catholic Church — which is, of course, quite a different thing.”
 
Wow, You so have my sympathy! I just joined the church last April, I came from a long journey that was very conservative protestant.

If they push to do another meeting- which I’m sure they will in time- ask the your RCIA leader or someone good with Church theology to be at the meeting with you. Why go it alone?

It is not impossible for him or them to bring up the “husband is Head of the House” scriptures. If they do, try 1st Peter 3:7 Husbands are commanded to be considerate of their wives & to treat them with respect. Ephesians 5:21 says “you are to submit one to another as unto Christ.” That includes him submitting too! 🙂

Keep in mind there may be more to him not wanting you to join besides it just being a Catholic faith. He may not want to deal with all his peers and family with it- let’s face it, doing battle with one person is easier for him, then dealing with a whole family &/ church family.

Something you might mention to him when timing is good is, that you can’t get accurate information about with the Catholic church teaches from Non- Catholic sources- it is serious conflict of interest and would always be bias. What the church teaches and what the media says and what other churches teach about it are often & usually 3 different things.

Praying for you!
 
Just another update…
I have been emailing back and forth with my RCIA coordinator and she’s invited me totalk with her one-on–one. I’ll be going to see her on Thursday after work.

I definitely believe that at least part of the husband’s problem is that he is quite insecure within himself. He puts too much stock in what other people think of him. In this case, he seems worried that what I’m doing is making him look like an ineffective spiritual leader in the eyes of the church and his family. My family sees right through this and stands by me and my right to make my own decisions regarding my faith (they’ve never been a part of the CofC to begin with).
 
I’m so happy that you have the support of your family. That makes things easier at least. Do you have some family members that are Catholic?
 
Evania said:
I’m so happy that you have the support of your family. That makes things easier at least. Do you have some family members that are Catholic?
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Not anybody in my immediate family. My parents are Presbyterians who are currently attending a Methodist church. 🙂
 
HeatherWB said:
Not anybody in my immediate family. My parents are Presbyterians who are currently attending a Methodist church. 🙂
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My wife would prefer that I attend the mega-church that her and my daughter attend but she knows, that isn’t going to happen. She laments it and is jealous when she sees families going together to her church. It’s a shame that we aren’t on the same page on worship but I’m not willing to sacrifice what I know I need to do.

Having said that, she is at least accepting and supporting of my spiritual journey. For this, I have great thanks.

At this time, I don’t see my calling being an apologist. In my Baptist background, I never felt that God needed defending. He is the truth and all I can do is share the truth. In my current life, as a student of the Catholic Church, I don’t know why she needs defending. As an instrument of the truth, what’s to defend? Frankly, at this time, any defense I would give would be a product of incompetence. I’ve been learning much but it is far from solidly worked out in my mind.

Regardless, I will pray for you. Father, thank you for so many of us making this spiritual journey into the Catholic Church. Thank you for this church that is a beacon of your truth. Please give this woman the strength to persevere through the doubt of family and friends and keep her close so she may gain confidence in your word. Help this woman and her husband have peace in their household as they both long to be closer to you, may it bring them closer to each other. In the name of Jesus,
Amen
 
HeatherWB said:
Recently, I started RCIA classes and I’m really excited about the whole process. Unfortunately, my husband doesn’t share my enthusiasm. We’ve both been active in a Protestant church (Church of Christ) for many years. My husband intends on staying there and I’m OK with that and don’t hold anything against him for it.

Originally we had agreed that I would be the one to let the church know of my departure. He comes home from church today and announces that one of the elders and his wife want to come to our house one night this week to talk about this. The cat is out of the bag. :mad: The husband announced that he had joined one of the church’s small groups and he will resume attending Wednesday night Bible study.

I don’t want to be rude, but frankly I’m not interested in talking to anybody, particularly if I suspect that they want to feed me a bunch of anti-Catholic babble. They don’t have to agree with my decision, but they need to respect my right to make decisions in my own best interest.

Any (name removed by moderator)ut would be much appreciated.
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Welcome & congratulations on your journey home! 🙂
It may be a long & difficult road ahead but it will be very much worth it.
 
HeatherWB said:
As a matter of fact, I have read Rome Sweet Home. One of the big differences between them and us is that the hubs is a bit chauvinistic and considers himself the spiritual leader of the home. He has made it clear that he will not participate in any of it with me and that would include reading anything pro-Catholic that I might give him.

Nobody can make me do anything I don’t want to do.
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I am just observing this thread (that’s not true; I am also praying for your much needed resolution!!!), and to the bolded, I say 👍👍👍

Peace and prayers
 
Dear Heather,

We have dear friends who are CofC. In fact the husband, is the grandson and son of CofC preachers. For years we’ve been studying the Bible with them. I was always conscience of the fact that they were trying to convert us. Then two years ago we announce to them that this Sola Scriptura stuff isnt working for us. Everybody and their grandmother has a different take on Scripture. SS wasnt enough for us, and that we were considering Orthodoxy or Catholicism. They were just floored. The Bible studies since then have taken a ‘mean’ turn, and we’ve been able to ‘softened’ them with quotes from the early church Fathers or what the Church’s tradition has to say about certain passages. The two big stumps for them, trying to show me where in the Bible does it states Sola Scriptura, and who do they think put the Bible together for us. Now we have them thinking.

Pray, be humble, you love your husband, you want the Lord to soften his heart on this issue of seeing where the real Church of Christ is, the One, Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church.
 
=HeatherWB;11274194]Recently, I started RCIA classes and I’m really excited about the whole process. Unfortunately, my husband doesn’t share my enthusiasm. We’ve both been active in a Protestant church (Church of Christ) for many years. My husband intends on staying there and I’m OK with that and don’t hold anything against him for it.
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Originally we had agreed that I would be the one to let the church know of my departure. He comes home from church today and announces that one of the elders and his wife want to come to our house one night this week to talk about this. The cat is out of the bag. :mad: The husband announced that he had joined one of the church’s small groups and he will resume attending Wednesday night Bible study.
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I don’t want to be rude, but frankly I’m not interested in talking to anybody, particularly if I suspect that they want to feed me a bunch of anti-Catholic babble. They don’t have to agree with my decision, but they need to respect my right to make decisions in my own best interest.
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Any (name removed by moderator)ut would be much appreciated.
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THEY WILL KNOW WE ARE CHRISTIAN By OUR CHARITY:)

I suggest you listen
Then share that you have come to understand that because their is…

One God [Triune: Mt. 28:18-20]

Can have ONLY One set of Faith beliefs [truth is always singular per defiend issue]

and: God [Yahweh and Christ] always and consistanly choose only “One chosen faith /people”… OT = the Hewbrews NT = The Catholic Church and YES it’s biblically provable.

BUT a cautionary note dear friend:
It WILL BE ESSENTIAL that you agree [and hubby] to raise your children in the Catholic
Faith. [see my PM to you]

Eph. 4:2-8 With all humility and mildness, with patience, supporting one another in charity. Careful to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. [ONLY] One body [Church] and one Spirit; as you are called in one hope of your calling. One Lord, one faith, one baptism. One God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in us all. But to every one of us is given grace, according to the measure of the giving of Christ"

John.10: 16 “And I have other sheep, that are not of this fold; I must bring them also, and they will heed my voice. So there shall be one flock, one shepherd”

Eph. 2:19-20 “So then you are no longer strangers and sojourners, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, [SINGULAR] built upon the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure is joined together and grows into a holy temple in the Lord; in whom you also are built into it for a dwelling place of God in the Spirit.”

Eph. 3: 9-10 “And to make all men see what is the plan of the mystery hidden for ages in God who created all things; that through the church [singular] the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the principalities and powers in the heavenly places. This was according to the eternal purpose which he has realized in Christ Jesus our Lord,"

I shared the Bible for your edification. I doubt it would be beneficial to share it with folks NOT open to God’s singular truths?

God Bless you,
Patrick [PJM]
 
A way to approach it may be to say something like, “I learned …] in the Churches of Christ, and when I investigated it further I realized that the Catholic Church is right about …] because of …]”

Example: “I learned in the Churches of Christ that God loves me and every human being because He created all of us for His eternal love. When I thought it through I realized that since God has never created anyone by accident, but has created every human being on earth on purpose because He loves them, the Catholic Church is right to be opposed to abortion and birth control, since God will never create anyone that He does not love.”

[Expect them to go crazy and start calling you names, but they won’t have a rational rebuttal to this one.]

Or if the topic is the Scriptures, “I learned in the Churches of Christ that the Bible is the Word of God, that it is divinely inspired, and that it is without error. I was curious to know more, so studied about where the Bible came from, and realized that without Pope Damasus and Pope Innocent III, we would have no idea which books belong in the Bible. Since we trust the Catholic Popes to give us the list of books that belong in our Bible, it seems to make sense to trust them to know how to interpret them properly, as well.”

In every case, begin by affirming that you learned many good things in the Churches of Christ, and that it is because they did such a good job of teaching you these good things that now you are seeking to know more, and that you have found the “more” that you seek in the Catholic Church. Don’t make it a game of opposition, but give them the credit they are due, and show them how they are part of your journey of faith.

Depending on the emotions involved, this may or may not be effective in terms of evangelism, but it will at least show them that you have thought this through, and that you have reasons that make good sense for looking into the Catholic Church.
 
jmcrae said:
A way to approach it may be to say something like, “I learned …] in the Churches of Christ, and when I investigated it further I realized that the Catholic Church is right about …] because of …]”

Example: “I learned in the Churches of Christ that God loves me and every human being because He created all of us for His eternal love. When I thought it through I realized that since God has never created anyone by accident, but has created every human being on earth on purpose because He loves them, the Catholic Church is right to be opposed to abortion and birth control, since God will never create anyone that He does not love.”

[Expect them to go crazy and start calling you names, but they won’t have a rational rebuttal to this one.]

Or if the topic is the Scriptures, “I learned in the Churches of Christ that the Bible is the Word of God, that it is divinely inspired, and that it is without error. I was curious to know more, so studied about where the Bible came from, and realized that without Pope Damasus and Pope Innocent III, we would have no idea which books belong in the Bible. Since we trust the Catholic Popes to give us the list of books that belong in our Bible, it seems to make sense to trust them to know how to interpret them properly, as well.”

In every case, begin by affirming that you learned many good things in the Churches of Christ, and that it is because they did such a good job of teaching you these good things that now you are seeking to know more, and that you have found the “more” that you seek in the Catholic Church. Don’t make it a game of opposition, but give them the credit they are due, and show them how they are part of your journey of faith.

Depending on the emotions involved, this may or may not be effective in terms of evangelism, but it will at least show them that you have thought this through, and that you have reasons that make good sense for looking into the Catholic Church.
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I love this approach!! Thanks for sharing it- being a convert this is so true!!!

mlz
 
jmcrae said:
In every case, begin by affirming that you learned many good things in the Churches of Christ, and that it is because they did such a good job of teaching you these good things that now you are seeking to know more, and that you have found the “more” that you seek in the Catholic Church. Don’t make it a game of opposition, but give them the credit they are due, and show them how they are part of your journey of faith.
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This is absolutely true! I have learned a lot of things in my 20+ year journey with the CofC, especially in the way of Bible truths. They loved me, accepted me for who I was, and helped me become closer to God, for which I am eternally grateful. What I’m doing now is building upon that understanding and filling in the gaps in my knowledge. Nobody should feel threatened by that! 🙂
 
If you must talk to them, ask them why they even need a bible study, if scripture alone is sufficient to understand itself. Why can’t everyone just pick up the bible and understand its meaning without study?

Evangelize them!
 
WD615 said:
Just know that much of the resistance can come from the fact he may not understand Catholicism or it may seem so completely foreign. We you get down to it, most of the stuff you’re taught at least in conservative Protestant churches is the exact opposite of Catholic teachings. It’s hard to get over that hump. Same thing goes for the elder and his wife I’m sure.
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Also remember there is common ground in the values, if you are coming from a conservative protestant tradition.

The theology might be different, but a lot of Catholics/Conservative Protestants are pro-life, pro-traditional marriage, etc.

That’s a real opening to keeping the lines of communication open. (Tho…I’m not too sure given what OP has said about her marriage/church community.)
 
Kal2012 said:
Also remember there is common ground in the values, if you are coming from a conservative protestant tradition.

The theology might be different, but a lot of Catholics/Conservative Protestants are pro-life, pro-traditional marriage, etc.

That’s a real opening to keeping the lines of communication open. (Tho…I’m not too sure given what OP has said about her marriage/church community.)
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This is what made it easier for me with the few relatives who gave me grief. When I pointed out the similarities they stopped fighting a bit, but then of course one pointed out that the “sameness” meant I shouldn’t need to convert. That’s when I explained that this is MY path. Trying to say the Catholic church is the RIGHT church for everyone tends to automatically begin a path of defensiveness…even if you think that’s the correct idea. Saying it’s what path I am choosing to get to “paradise” (Baptist speak), kind of made most of them back off. 🙂
 
God Bless you Heather on Your Journey and Your big swim across the mighty Tiber:)
I will try to pray for you as often as I can. Remember to pray for Mama Mary`s intercession and she will be happy to pray on Your behalf to Our King Jesus.

Please keep me updated on Your Journey of faith.

God Bless!
 
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