Thinking about it, I can’t tell if I “knew” or not. I “don’t know” if I knew that disobeying my parents was a grave matter.
This, by nature, disqualifies it as a mortal sin. But it sounds like the Holy Spirit is bringing you to grow in faith, and that you have gradually become aware that it is very important to obey your parents.
This means your conscience is becoming more sensitive, which is a sign of spiritual maturity.
Remember also that, when you behave those who are placed in authority over you, even when it is something with which you don’t agree or don’t think is serious, God will richly bless your choice to obey. It shows Him that you can be faithful in small things, and He will make you faithful in bigger things.
Trust that your father made this rule for your benefit, and use it to benefit you as much as you can. Focus your time on doing things that will grow more spiritual fruit in your life.
Honestly, I’m just worried I screwed up with God again and that I’ve been recieving communion for years sinfully.
We are all people in process, and are judged by how much we know and understand. As we mature in the faith, our understanding about morals grows also. There is confession at every mass for venial sins before Eucharist. Make an act of contrition, and stop beating up on yourself!
Trust your soul to a faithful Creator! Ask the Holy Spirit to show you when you miss the mark because you desire with all your heart to please Jesus. Then let the HS do His job, and don’t try to play God for yourself. The HS will show you if you are wrong.
Use an examination of conscience, and if you are not sure, read the catechism, and if you are still worried, speak to a priest or spiritual director.