Dilemma

[Sometimes]

Hello all. I have a problem, and I’d really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice, as I’m not sure myself what to do.

I’m a young woman living in Ireland, I’m currently a university student. I always felts this attraction towards religion, and wanted to learn more about it, though I called myself an atheist. So when I began university, I decided to join the Christian Union society. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it and liked the company of the people there. Later, I told my parents that I joined and at first they were OK with it, but soon they said they were getting worried about me. They thought I was getting mixed up in a group of people that I shouldn’t be. What made things worse, was that I used to suffer from psychosis, and my parents thought it was the ‘psychosis talking’. I stopped attending the meetings, but I really want to go again! I’m not sure whether I should I listen to my parents (after all, they are only looking out for me) or should I just do what I want.

 

[Linusthe2nd]

Hello all. I have a problem, and I’d really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice, as I’m not sure myself what to do.

I’m a young woman living in Ireland, I’m currently a university student. I always felts this attraction towards religion, and wanted to learn more about it, though I called myself an atheist. So when I began university, I decided to join the Christian Union society. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it and liked the company of the people there. Later, I told my parents that I joined and at first they were OK with it, but soon they said they were getting worried about me. They thought I was getting mixed up in a group of people that I shouldn’t be. What made things worse, was that I used to suffer from psychosis, and my parents thought it was the ‘psychosis talking’. I stopped attending the meetings, but I really want to go again! I’m not sure whether I should I listen to my parents (after all, they are only looking out for me) or should I just do what I want.

As long as your parents are supporting you, you are bound in conscience to obey them in all things so long as they are not asking you to do something sinful. God has given them special graces to know what is good for you. So be an obedient daughter and do not add to their worries by disobeying them. Whatever good God has planned for you will not be gained by disobedience. And your parents will see your good will as a sign of growing maturity. Peace always.

 

[Lucky7]

Hello all. I have a problem, and I’d really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice, as I’m not sure myself what to do.

I’m a young woman living in Ireland, I’m currently a university student. I always felts this attraction towards religion, and wanted to learn more about it, though I called myself an atheist. So when I began university, I decided to join the Christian Union society. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it and liked the company of the people there. Later, I told my parents that I joined and at first they were OK with it, but soon they said they were getting worried about me. They thought I was getting mixed up in a group of people that I shouldn’t be. What made things worse, was that I used to suffer from psychosis, and my parents thought it was the ‘psychosis talking’. I stopped attending the meetings, but I really want to go again! I’m not sure whether I should I listen to my parents (after all, they are only looking out for me) or should I just do what I want.

This reminds me of my journey to the Catholic Church. In my journey, I first attended a small, unknown christian church when I told my mother that I had converted. After describing the church to her, she got worried because she said it sounded like a cult. She asked that I look into the mainline, traditional churches. I listened to her, researched/visited a bunch of mainline, Protestant, the Orthodox and the Catholic Church… and I ended up in the Catholic Church.

It sounds like you are being called. I would listen to your parents and continue looking.

 

[sicutincensum]

As long as your parents are supporting you, you are bound in conscience to obey them in all things so long as they are not asking you to do something sinful. God has given them special graces to know what is good for you. So be an obedient daughter and do not add to their worries by disobeying them. Whatever good God has planned for you will not be gained by disobedience. And your parents will see your good will as a sign of growing maturity. Peace always.

I agree with Linus, and would further add: when you’re in doubt whether what they command you to do is a sin or not, you should obey authority, in that case, your parents.

Try to act like a “normal” girl (there’s no such thing as normal in this world, right?), keep calm and respectful in any discussion you may have with your parents, and they will eventually respect your choices as coming from a mature person, indeed, as choices! They currently believe you’re not doing a choice, just being led by your sickness to do something you didn’t actually choose.

 

[robwar]

Hello all. I have a problem, and I’d really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice, as I’m not sure myself what to do.

I’m a young woman living in Ireland, I’m currently a university student. I always felts this attraction towards religion, and wanted to learn more about it, though I called myself an atheist. So when I began university, I decided to join the Christian Union society. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it and liked the company of the people there. Later, I told my parents that I joined and at first they were OK with it, but soon they said they were getting worried about me. They thought I was getting mixed up in a group of people that I shouldn’t be. What made things worse, was that I used to suffer from psychosis, and my parents thought it was the ‘psychosis talking’. I stopped attending the meetings, but I really want to go again! I’m not sure whether I should I listen to my parents (after all, they are only looking out for me) or should I just do what I want.

Are you parents worried that you are leaving the Catholic Church or is it based on other fears like psychosis? Do they practice anything any faith at all? Their reasoning which you listed seemed to be fears of Psychosis and not a valid judgement. I disagree with the others that you should not go to obey your parents. Being around others of faith should be very helpful to you. Even though they are supporting you in paying for your education doesn’t give them the authority to micro-manage your social life as a young adult. St. Francis of Assisi broke with his father when his father wanted him to stop helping the poor. Being drawn to others of faith in God should only be helpful to you not hurting you at all.
Seeing changes in you should help their fears of being around people of faith. You can be respectful to them but you are a young adult and after a while you will have to make your own choices and social decisions.

 

[robwar]

Sometimes wants to learn about faith and God. She admits to struggling in the past with psychosis. Being around those who believe in God, give a social outlet and supports will only benefit her. To say as a young adult she needs to blindly obey her parents because they object to this based on unreasonable fears is sad. She will not grow and mature and come into belief in God if she is isolated and alone. Sometimes as a young adult, you need to step out and that may include “disobedience” to one’s parents. Financial support does not mean she has to have her social life micro managed by her parents if attending this is helpful to her, puts her in contact with others and helps her learn and believe in God. A blind type of obedience will only lead Sometimes to more isolation, which does not help someone who has struggled in the past with psychosis.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

Uh, no. I don’t know where everyone is getting the idea that you need to obey your parents. You are an adult and you can make your own choices and stand by them.

 

[Lucky7]

Uh, no. I don’t know where everyone is getting the idea that you need to obey your parents. You are an adult and you can make your own choices and stand by them.

I have not said that she should “obey” them. As an adult, we can also respect our parents when they express a legitmate concern. Part of being an adult is also acknowledging that our parents might just have a good idea or two. I’m not sure I understand what the OP’s parents are concerned with, but I think she should at least check into whatever that is. In my case, my mother’s concern was absolutely on the mark and I am forever grateful to her for her wisdom/insight.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

I have not said that she should “obey” them. As an adult, we can also respect our parents when they express a legitmate concern. Part of being an adult is also acknowledging that our parents might just have a good idea or two. I’m not sure I understand what the OP’s parents are concerned with, but I think she should at least check into whatever that is. In my case, my mother’s concern was absolutely on the mark and I am forever grateful to her for her wisdom/insight.

I wasn’t referring to your post. Read a couple of the ones above yours. Phrases like “bound by conscience to obey in all things” are a bit extreme. It’s one thing to consider what your parents are saying, another to mindlessly follow them.

 

[LilyM]

I don’t see that what you propose to do could in any way be linked to your past psychosis or that your parents’ fears are particularly justified. I realize I don’t know your whole life story of course.

Could you perhaps have a chat with your doctor or counsellor about it - or get your parents to do so? It might reassure all of you enough that you can then proceed.

 

[TimeEntrance]

Hello all. I have a problem, and I’d really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice, as I’m not sure myself what to do.

I’m a young woman living in Ireland, I’m currently a university student. I always felts this attraction towards religion, and wanted to learn more about it, though I called myself an atheist. So when I began university, I decided to join the Christian Union society. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it and liked the company of the people there. Later, I told my parents that I joined and at first they were OK with it, but soon they said they were getting worried about me. They thought I was getting mixed up in a group of people that I shouldn’t be. What made things worse, was that I used to suffer from psychosis, and my parents thought it was the ‘psychosis talking’. I stopped attending the meetings, but I really want to go again! I’m not sure whether I should I listen to my parents (after all, they are only looking out for me) or should I just do what I want.

Parents don’t necessarily “look out” (per guidance) for their children. Parents usually indoctrinate their children with their own beliefs. If the parents are members of the Church of Satan and have given their souls to Satan they make every attempt to ensure the eternal damnation of their children.

My father was miserable about certain things (usually over race) and he wanted me to inherit the same feelings and not be free of them. So, he used to get enraged over certain things, like me hoping the Green Bay Packers win the Superbowl .

My mother had certain conceptions of the world she’d get infuriated with if my views contradicted hers. For one, she regarded even the most corrupted in the inner-city misunderstood and benevolent, and for some reason me as close to Satanic as one could get. In part because I knew the dangers and understood the streets hunted me (and all it’s inhabitants) to make me another casualty. Her views have largely changed in her 60’s.

There is a maxim in boxing I shall share with you, as one might considered it transferable to life outside the boxing ring: At all times protect yourself.

 

[Bill_7154]

Hello all. I have a problem, and I’d really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice, as I’m not sure myself what to do.

I’m a young woman living in Ireland, I’m currently a university student. I always felts this attraction towards religion, and wanted to learn more about it, though I called myself an atheist. So when I began university, I decided to join the Christian Union society. To my surprise, I really enjoyed it and liked the company of the people there. Later, I told my parents that I joined and at first they were OK with it, but soon they said they were getting worried about me. They thought I was getting mixed up in a group of people that I shouldn’t be. What made things worse, was that I used to suffer from psychosis, and my parents thought it was the ‘psychosis talking’. I stopped attending the meetings, but I really want to go again! I’m not sure whether I should I listen to my parents (after all, they are only looking out for me) or should I just do what I want.

I vote for do what you want. If you were doing something dangerous or bad that would be a different story. Your doing something good and your enjoying it. This is great. If conversations with your parents about this are troublesome you don’t have to engage in discussions with them about it. And it couldn’t be ‘the psychosis talking’ unless you immagined you went to these meeting and you didn’t, right? It’s not a delusion that you went to these meetings. It’s not a delusion that you enjoyed it, right? So it’s not psychosis talking, plain and simple.

Go back to the meetings. Make friends with the other members. Continue to enjoy the meetings. Consider doing social things with members there outside of the meetings.

Peace,
Bill

 

[robwar]

I wasn’t referring to your post. Read a couple of the ones above yours. Phrases like “bound by conscience to obey in all things” are a bit extreme. It’s one thing to consider what your parents are saying, another to mindlessly follow them.

exactly! Honoring your parents does not mean at all blind obedience in everything they say.
That is not how one can develop and mature. This is a young adult not a 13 year old.

 

[felmus]

It is too hard to tell what the situation is.

Do you want to be Catholic? Are there any Catholic groups you could join?

Also, what are your parents’ objections? Are they Catholic?

Honoring your father and mother doesn’t mean doing whatever they say (especially if it is a sin), but ignoring them on this without having a rational discussion would be mistaken.

 

[mcrow]

It is too hard to tell what the situation is.

Do you want to be Catholic? Are there any Catholic groups you could join?

Also, what are your parents’ objections? Are they Catholic?

Honoring your father and mother doesn’t mean doing whatever they say (especially if it is a sin), but ignoring them on this without having a rational discussion would be mistaken.

I agree it’s sort of difficult to tell the situation. Are the parents religious? If so , Catholic? What exactly about this group is making her parents nervous? Is the group Catholic or something else?

As for those going on about obeying her parents:

It is true we are to obey our parents, particularly as a child. As an adult we should honor our parents and respect their opinions but we are not bound to blindly accept their judgment. Nobody should accept anything from their parents that would separate them from God.

 

[TimeEntrance]

It is true we are to obey our parents, particularly as a child. As an adult we should honor our parents and respect their opinions but we are not bound to blindly accept their judgment. Nobody should accept anything from their parents that would separate them from God.

I have no idea what to exactly conclude about Malachi Martin and some of his claims. I would really hope a number of his claims are wrong. However, he claims to have known people that have given their small children to Satan. In his novel Windswept House which I never finished and hardly read much of, I do recall a part where a Cardinal or Bishop preforming a Black Mass or something had some prominent man bring his little child girl and she was supposed to give herself to Satan or something. I forget exactly her role. But her conscience to her it was wrong and she disobeyed her father.

He can be heard on youtube with some of his former interviews. He’s dead now I believe.

I hope his claim about the Black Mass enthroning Satan inside the Vatican is not true . I know he he claims Satan and the Satanic followers in the Church have not yet gained hold of the Pope or the Papacy - their ultimate goal according to him. But I digress with all that.

amazon.com/Windswept-House-A-Vatican-Novel/dp/0385492316

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51dedLwCkxL.BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA300_SH20_OU01.jpg

FASCINATING! December 31, 1999
By A Customer
Formataperback
In a radio interview, Malachi Martin said this book was about 85% true, and that he changed only the names and certain identifying particulars, for obvious reasons.

(one reviewer)

 

[Sometimes]

First of all, thanks for the replies everyone. They all gave me something to consider.

My parents are Catholic - as in they were born Catholic, but they don’t follow any of the church’s teachings.

The group I was talking about is non denominational Christian group. It is for any University students who want to participate in a group that’s Christian orientated. There are both Protestants and Catholics that attend it.

 

[thewanderer]

First of all, thanks for the replies everyone. They all gave me something to consider.

My parents are Catholic - as in they were born Catholic, but they don’t follow any of the church’s teachings.

The group I was talking about is non denominational Christian group. It is for any University students who want to participate in a group that’s Christian orientated. There are both Protestants and Catholics that attend it.

The fact that they are Catholic, whether practicing or not makes no difference. Honestly, I am reall surprized at some of the responses here.

This is what the Church has to say on the matter

The duties of children

…

2217 As long as a child lives at home with his parents, the child should obey his parents in all that they ask of him when it is for his good or that of the family. "Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord."22 Children should also obey the reasonable directions of their teachers and all to whom their parents have entrusted them. But if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so.
As they grow up, children should continue to respect their parents. They should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.

So, first, you are in college, do you still live at home? If not then you are no longer under any obligation to obey your parents. (you must still, of course, respect them). If you do still live at home should realize that as you get older the family dynamic changes, you are becoming your own person, you need to develop the ability to make deccisions such as these for youself it is in your best interest to do so and it is part of your parents job to help you do so. Whether or not you should follow your parents advice depends both on how good/bad it would be to go to these meetings for you, how good/bad it would be to stay away, and how strongly your parents feel about this issue. It is certainly not good to be a college student who allows your parents to control every/any aspect of your life simply because they said so. However, that said, rebellion against ones parents is also not usually a good thing either. Unfortunately this is an issue without a clear-cut answer as the circumstances involved make all the difference.

 

[robwar]

I have no idea what to exactly conclude about Malachi Martin and some of his claims. I would really hope a number of his claims are wrong. However, he claims to have known people that have given their small children to Satan. In his novel Windswept House which I never finished and hardly read much of, I do recall a part where a Cardinal or Bishop preforming a Black Mass or something had some prominent man bring his little child girl and she was supposed to give herself to Satan or something. I forget exactly her role. But her conscience to her it was wrong and she disobeyed her father.

He can be heard on youtube with some of his former interviews. He’s dead now I believe.

I hope his claim about the Black Mass enthroning Satan inside the Vatican is not true . I know he he claims Satan and the Satanic followers in the Church have not yet gained hold of the Pope or the Papacy - their ultimate goal according to him. But I digress with all that.

amazon.com/Windswept-House-A-Vatican-Novel/dp/0385492316

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51dedLwCkxL.BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA300_SH20_OU01.jpg

(one reviewer)

Sorry but that does not apply to this situation here. Her parent seem to object based on mental illness fears than religious reason because they don’t practice any faith.

 

[robwar]

The fact that they are Catholic, whether practicing or not makes no difference. Honestly, I am reall surprized at some of the responses here.

This is what the Church has to say on the matter

So, first, you are in college, do you still live at home? If not then you are no longer under any obligation to obey your parents. (you must still, of course, respect them). If you do still live at home should realize that as you get older the family dynamic changes, you are becoming your own person, you need to develop the ability to make deccisions such as these for youself it is in your best interest to do so and it is part of your parents job to help you do so. Whether or not you should follow your parents advice depends both on how good/bad it would be to go to these meetings for you, how good/bad it would be to stay away, and how strongly your parents feel about this issue. It is certainly not good to be a college student who allows your parents to control every/any aspect of your life simply because they said so. However, that said, rebellion against ones parents is also not usually a good thing either. Unfortunately this is an issue without a clear-cut answer as the circumstances involved make all the difference.

Whether she lives at home or not, her parents are not motived by religious reason, they are not practicing their faith and the stated reason by Sometimes is they are objecting due to fears of mental illness or a return to it. She is perfectly in her rights to go and gain the benefit of fellowship with others, Protestant and Catholic. She want to have faith in God and get some friendship and help and it is ridiculous to bring up CCC and tell her to obey her parents. Honoring your parents is not blind obedience especially when they don’t want her to go and have faith in God which they seem to equate with mental illness.