Disappointed by a party given by Catholics

[JBCatholicRN]

My wife and I do not have friends for this reason. We have yet to find a young couple that practices their faith outside the walls of the Church. The one friend we both shared was a female and my sons Godmother. We ended up leaving her due to her constant requests for a threesome (she was a Catholic also, same parish).
I have found that older people, 60+ are generally better behaved than younger people.

 

[Shadark]

Pfft, being a offered a threesome is a compliment. It shows you’ve still go ‘it’, just don’t take up the offer.

 

[Em_in_FL]

I’m sorry you had this experience…

We have a lot of good friends that are Catholics… no, they’re not all perfect - definitely evidence of failures to follow the faith in their lives, as I’m sure there are signals to them that we are not perfect as well… I’m not - I try, and I completely agree with every aspect of the teachings of the faith and try to be perfect, but I’m not. We’re all human, we’re all sinners.
But, that doesn’t mean we can’t encourage each other in trying to be better. If this group of people made you uncomfortable, then spend less time with them.
Our Catholic friend gatherings are usually quite innocent… not perfect, but definitely not at all what you described - so it’s definitely possible to have Catholic friendships that would bring you more peace…

Pray for your friends… they probably don’t really understand how they made you feel, nor do they really understand what their behavior looks like. Pray for their understanding and growth in holiness…

 

[catharina]

Pfft, being a offered a threesome is a compliment. It shows you’ve still go ‘it’, just don’t take up the offer.

Not even slightly amusing.

 

[KostyaJMJ]

It sounds like it was pretty mild party.

She Wolf is pretty popular right now and it has a woman dancing in a cage. Was that the song they were playing? It is too silly to be sexually provocative and it really does make you want to dance. Maybe the guy who was taking his shirt off felt the infectious beat and simply couldn’t help himself. It sounds like something we might have at a party right before we move on to the Catholic trivia drinking games.

 

[armywife]

If a man is embarrassing himself, I tell him. Back in my single days I have said to a guy, “You know, you’re embarrassing yourself” and even to my husband (but only once in all our marriage).

 

[AnthonytheGreat]

It sounds like it was pretty mild party.

She Wolf is pretty popular right now and it has a woman dancing in a cage. Was that the song they were playing? It is too silly to be sexually provocative and it really does make you want to dance. Maybe the guy who was taking his shirt off felt the infectious beat and simply couldn’t help himself. It sounds like something we might have at a party right before we move on to the Catholic trivia drinking games.

 

[Sierrah]

I finally am happy to be with people who are good to me but… I want to please God more. How do people think if next time I see the hostess of the party I tell her that I really appreciated her friendliness but provacative videos do offend me? My main fear is she won’t realize I am serious and think I am joking.

Any words of wisdom?

Thanks

Your friends need to grow up.

As to the guy asking you that question. My question to you would be why did you answer him? I would have said something to the effect of “It’s none of your business” or “I don’t know you well enough to share that kind of information with you” I wouldn’t have put up with his behavior or the others I’m referring to his pursistant flirting and their reaction. I would have gotten up and left. Friends or no friends. People will only treat you as bad or disrespectful as you let them. Granted I may be older then you and when you get a certain age you cease caring so much what other people think making it a little easier to react. If I were you I would find more mature friends though.

 

[I_Fortuna]

I was invited to a party at a house of a lady I know from my bible group. A lot of people there are part of the group and or go to church regularly. I am happy to finally have friends that are believers.

Some of the men had a few beers but nothing excessive. However, the women decided to watch videos on you tube and screaming at the good looking singers. Most of these women are well over 35 and their husbands were at the party. Is it me or would a husband not feel hurt deep down by that? Then, one man (married) got up to dance and pretended he was going to take his shirt off. All the woman cheered him on. All I could think was ‘is the joke not a bit old?’

Then one woman decided to play a video (not sure who it was) where a scantily clad lady was in a cage moving in a very provacative way. The women all though it was funny. I was humilitated and found it degrading. Expecially since that was the first time I watched a music video in over 15 years I didn’t realize how bad they got.

But the worst is the kids (aged 5 to 9) and there was at least six of them walked into the room and no one batted an eye lash. These woman were screaming and enjoying the video and clapping in front of their children. One woman’s son was tired and resting his head on her lap and she was clapping and singing. Is it me or would most boys deep down not be embarrased to see their mom carry on like that?

Then one man asked me where my husband was to which I responded ‘I don’t have a husband’ Then he said to me ‘Oh you are divorced’ I said ‘no I have never been married’ So then he asked me if I was ‘pure’. I gave him a funny look. Instead of realizing I was offended, he asked again so I said ‘Yes I am’ and he said ‘I don’t believe you’. All night long he kept flirting with me and all night long I kept telling him I had no interested. Everyone though it was funny. The crueller my rejection, the more people laughed.

I finally am happy to be with people who are good to me but… I want to please God more. How do people think if next time I see the hostess of the party I tell her that I really appreciated her friendliness but provacative videos do offend me? My main fear is she won’t realize I am serious and think I am joking.

Any words of wisdom?

Thanks

Boy it sounds more like Salem’s Lot or Children of the Corn to me instead of Catholic behavior. I am appalled. I would speak to my priest and not socialize anymore with that group. They seem very irreligious and I would have been offended too and I am not a prude. This is one of the reasons I left my former Protestant church. There is no excuse for bad behavior in or out of church. It appears very hypocritical.

Shame on them for their indecent behavior. This guy who came on to you is a real creep. What a jerk. Yuck! Don’t be afraid to set boundaries with those who offend you.

In my opinion you have been sexually harrassed. I would not put up with it and make it perfectly clear to the offenders that their behavior is unwelcome.

I have never be exposed to this kind of behavior at my church. You have my permission to show my post to them too.

 

[beckyann2597]

I am a married woman, and I wanted to respond to your concern about the husbands perhaps having hurt feeling over the wife making a big deal about some celebrity. I am sure he is not. If my husband notices a beautiful woman, I know why… She is beautiful. It doesn’t mean he is going to cheat on me. It doesn’t mean he is going to become infatuated with this woman. It means God blessed this woman with incredible beauty and my husband noticed. No sin there. I know he loves me and finds me attractive and is going home with me.

My husband and I joke about our celebrity boyfriends and Girlfriends. For the longest time, My Rockstar Boyfriend was John Mayer and his Girlfriend was Sheryl Crow. At the moment, I have fallen back in “Like” with Bono, and my hubby’s new Girlfriend is Sarah McLaughlin. There is nothing wrong with a little playfulness in a marriage. And that is what they were doing. Playing.

 

[PatriceA]

I am a married woman, and I wanted to respond to your concern about the husbands perhaps having hurt feeling over the wife making a big deal about some celebrity. I am sure he is not. If my husband notices a beautiful woman, I know why… She is beautiful. It doesn’t mean he is going to cheat on me. It doesn’t mean he is going to become infatuated with this woman. It means God blessed this woman with incredible beauty and my husband noticed. No sin there. I know he loves me and finds me attractive and is going home with me.

My husband and I joke about our celebrity boyfriends and Girlfriends. For the longest time, My Rockstar Boyfriend was John Mayer and his Girlfriend was Sheryl Crow. At the moment, I have fallen back in “Like” with Bono, and my hubby’s new Girlfriend is Sarah McLaughlin. There is nothing wrong with a little playfulness in a marriage. And that is what they were doing. Playing.

A playful “joke” between a husband and a wife is quite different from a bunch of women sceaming over a celebrity. When our family attends my husband’s college football games I certainly wouldn’t appreciate it if he suddenly started hollering over the cheerleaders with the rest of the married guys in our little group, especially with my daughter present. And I know he wouldn’t appreciate it if all the women all started making a big deal about the football players and how good their butts look in the spandex.