This reminds me of a time when I was praying silently in the Adoration Chapel of my old parish. It was a warm spring day, and the windows to the small Chapel were open to allow in a cool breeze.
There were some boys outside playing with their skateboards on the Church steps, and all we could hear inside the Chapel was “skkkkkkkkkrash! skkkkkkrash!” as the boys attempted various jumps… and their cheers and boos as they fell or succeeded.
Eventually, when I realized that they weren’t going to go away, I went outside to speak with them.
“Hey guys. It’s a wonderful day out, isn’t it?”
“Yeah.” they agreed, somewhat reluctantly.
“I’m just wondering… is there somewhere else where you could take your skateboards to play? I’m sure you didn’t realize, but there’s a silent Adoration Chapel right there - see the windows open - it’s really small, it gets really hot in there if we close the windows… anyways, it’s really difficult to pray when we can hear you guys having so much fun out here. I’m sure you didn’t mean to be distracting - do you think you could even just move down to the other corner over there?”
“Yeah, sure. sorry about that.”
and the boys left to continue playing.
later, my godmother said “I was ready to really let lose on those kids. you were really nice to them, I couldn’t have done that.”
“Well, I just assumed that they honestly didn’t know any better.”
People don’t come to Mass with the intention of disrespecting Jesus. The choir doesn’t pick music with the intention of dissuading the participation of the congregation, or with the intention of disrespecting Jesus.
So I guess, when I see people suggesting that we chastise others so thoroughly and frequently, I have to wonder why everything is being taken as a personal affront - instead of being looked on as either ignorance, forgetfullness, or even an attempt to better engage oneself in the worship of the Church.
That being said, there are times when correction is needed… for example, when my eight year old little sister came outside, wearing a tube top, to join my mother and I in the front yard - I told her that the shirt she was wearing was disgusting.
My mother intervened, and told me to just wait for her to figure out for herself what is appropriate to wear.
I strongly disagree with this approach to parenting, as it is specifically a mother’s responsibility to instruct her daughters in how to respect their bodies.
When I see young women wearing miniskirts at Mass, I do make an effort to broach the topic of modesty with them. Still, I try to take the assumption of innocence…
When I see someone wearing a pair of jeans and tshirt at Mass, I wonder if maybe that person was busy doing something and ran out of time to get ready for Mass - or if they are just so focused on their desire for the Eucharist that they maybe forgot to pick out a better outfit - or if maybe they just can’t afford a too much nicer outfit, like myself.
I don’t tend to be one of those people who wants to think of themselves as better than the rest… because I’m not. How can I look down on someone who leaves right after communion with God - when I myself have been in communion with the devil himself and not known it for what it was? Surely if one of us is the worse sinner, it is I.
How can I chastise someone for speaking in the back of the Church, when I’ve been known to burst full out in tears during the Consecration? Or when I’ve spoken in the back of the Church before myself, asking someone to guide me through the morning prayer if we’re saying that morning - or passing a compliment to the choir director, or asking for a copy of the bulletin when the last one is gone…
We all forget ourselves some times, we all slip up in our own ways. I trust that many people are trying their best, and that when they go home to examine their conscience - they either know themselves what it is they are doing wrong in their lives - or the Holy Spirit will illumine it for them if they are meant to correct that particular thing at that moment.
Remember that we are all in a struggle with sin, every day. A struggle with complacency - over our own thoughts and deeds - every day. And that God will lead us through it at the pace that is right for each unique person.
(also, many of the things you listed are not liturgical abuses and it would seem arrogant, IMO, to ignore the norms and attempt to force everyone else around you to do things your way)
Pax Christi
