Do you feel offended by people who come to the CC dressed as if they were at a barbeque in their backyard?

[ThereseOfRoses]

I agree. I do not recall anyone in this thread rejecting Church teaching. I hope that my words were not understood to mean that I think otherwise.

I don’t think you were the person they were referring to. I’m thinking that individual is currently suspended from CAF. Also, I don’t think it was anyone “rejecting” Church teaching, but rather presenting their personal opinion as Church teaching and insisting that anyone who didn’t see things their way was in mortal sin…among other things.

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

"We have to pay attention to the Church’s common sense and stop making rules of our own. If we follow the rules of propriety, modesty, and good taste, we’re OK.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF"

I didn’t want to quote the whole post…and I don’t want to derail that thread…but I always learn a lot from your posts.

 

[CMatt25]

Personally…from your post…I think the one poster was right…you are giving traditionalist a bad name. It makes me NOT want to visit a TLM…I sure don’t want to have people looking down their nose at me because I’m wearing pants and don’t have my headcovered. Nor do I want to be responsible for people worried about that instead of focusing on the Mass.

Annabelle Marie, you make a valid point. The Apostle Paul did say somethng about us not being stumbling blocks. So if people are going to be so focused on your pants, I can see where perhaps it is best you not visit TLM and simply continue going to the Mass you do now. That way the folks at TLM can concentrate on Who and what they are there for. And you can be in His presence as well. God bless you and peace.

 

[CMatt25]

I guess I’m just offended by people who care what other people wear. Honestly, its between each person and God. With abortion, genocide, mass rape in the Congo, the priest abuse scandal and how it is causing some parishes to declare bankrupcy, the closure of Catholic schools, hunger, foreclosures, suicides from bullying or from husbands who lose their jobs and can’t provide for their families, and cancer, and euthenasia… how on earth can I have any any offense left for a man wearing flip-flops to church?

And yes, the use of cheap $2 flip-flops for much of the year in order to extend the life of my 2 pairs of leather shoes is a frugal measure. Our Priest wears flip-flops under his vestments. Jesus wore sandals with bare toes exposed but now its a sin to show our toes in the house of the Lord? Please!

I was born lower middle class, and we had many years of a typical corporate semi-affluence, and now after having a child with a disability, we are squarely in the poverty zone, full center. But never, ever did I give a rip what anyone else was wearing at Mass. I have enough motes in my eye, thank you very much.

Well said and God bless you.

 

[MarkThompson]

Annabelle Marie, you make a valid point. The Apostle Paul did say somethng about us not being stumbling blocks. So if people are going to be so focused on your pants, I can see where perhaps it is best you not visit TLM and simply continue going to the Mass you do now. That way the folks at TLM can concentrate on Who and what they are there for. And you can be in His presence as well. God bless you and peace.

Wow Matt, that’s the classiest way I’ve ever seen someone say “Screw off, we don’t want your kind at our precious TLM anyway.”

 

[Layman]

I think the objective should be to tone down personal expression as much as is reasonable. The people in the sanctuary put on a uniform, traditionally. It helps erase their personality. The congregation drawing attention to themselves goes against this aspiration.

Give give us all a respite from each other’s personas while The Holy Sacrifice Of The Mass is in progress.

 

[sovegna_vos]

I’m fairly conservative by instinct, and can appreciate the more traditional approach to what to wear to Mass and feel more comfortable so dressed, but consider it a private matter, rather than anything that should be enforced or censured.

What other people wear is none of my concern imho, and certainly I would consider it far from being my place to criticise or judge other people attending Mass.

Surely its whats in people’s hearts that matters?

 

[jazzbaby1]

I think the objective should be to tone down personal expression as much as is reasonable. The people in the sanctuary put on a uniform, traditionally. It helps erase their personality. The congregation drawing attention to themselves goes against this aspiration.

Give give us all a respite from each other’s personas while The Holy Sacrifice Of The Mass is in progress.

While I appreciate your sentiment here I have to ask…whose uniform do we use? I live in a small city where people are very casual Men who wear suits and ties stick out like a sore thumb in my parish. It’s far more common to see men in chinos and a polo shirt or a button down shirt with a sport coat. Dress for women runs the gamut although looking around mass yesterday (in part because of questions raised in this thread) the current “uniform” appears to be a turtleneck sweater with a quilted, sporty vest over it and women’s trousers or a calf length skirt. It’s cold where I live.

 

[Layman]

You’ll just have to go by the local norm. Dress smartly, to honour God but not to draw attention to yourself.

It’s interesting to me the internal confilict I have about dressing smartly for Mass. Always glad when I make the effort in the end.

 

[PatriceA]

You’ll just have to go by the local norm. Dress smartly, to honour God but not to draw attention to yourself.

It’s interesting to me the internal confilict I have about dressing smartly for Mass. Always glad when I make the effort in the end.

The arguement then goes full circle, because some of us way back on the first few pages were saying we were dressing similarly to other people in the pews, of course in a modest way. The OP was still arguing that women shouldn’t wear pants and should dress up, even though other women in the pews were were not in that attire.

 

[Layman]

Well, just do your best and don’t worry about others. One thing about human beings is that they’re very social. If enough people dress smartly and demurely the rest will get the message.

Some won’t. Foggedaboud 'em. Who knows why they dress that way? You won’t be lecturing them, anyway. Just attend Mass in peace.

We’re having a debate about the issue here, fine, but I doubt anyone is going to remonstrate with others in their church.

 

[Manofvirtue]

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[RuthCatherine]

It seems to me alot of people here are coming up with alot of reasons why they should not dress up for Mass. I’ll admit I don’t think it should have to be a dress for a woman but it sure well ought to modest clothing, pants or dresses. Alot of the pants women wear are not modest. They are way too tight. IMHO I feel Mass is no place for shorts on men or women. I, also, hate seeing a woman show up in sleeveless, short dresses. I’d rather see modest slacks.

The comment alot are saying is that it just matters if I show up, it doesn’t matter how I dress. It is just what is in my heart. That’s like saying, “All right God, just be glad I’m here. I didn’t care how I looked. I didn’t take the time to care. I didn’t feel like dressing up for you, even though you are the reason I am. God, just be glad I’m here.” It sounds all humble and nice but it’s really alot of look at me, see how humble I am. I could only just get here. Pretty proud of being so humble. What is in your heart shows up externally. This will be demonstrated differently by different people but there should be at least some effort added.

Just because there are alot worse problems in the world doesn’t mean there isn’t a problem with the way people dress. I am recently needing to change jobs and one of the first things told to us new employees is dress appropriately. Dress nice. If we are to do that for our human employees, shouldn’t we do that also for our God.

One thing we should always remember, too, is we may never know what is going on in peoples lives and what occured in their lives on the way to Mass. So, all that said, imho, we should always care about how we appear before God but be careful how we judge the dress of others. We are all on a journey and on different parts of the path.

 

[Ashurie]

If you do at some point decide that you need different clothing for Mass (and I’m not trying to be pushy about this at all , you might consider buying one or two items at a thrift store, since you are on a limited budget. I buy most of my skirts, dresses, and blouses at a thrift store, and they last a long time since I only wear them to Mass. I wear pants, otherwise. A nice skirt can be purchased for about $6.00.

Thanks for the idea…it is however going to be interesting for me. I am a 23 year old girl, and not the smallest girl either about AUSize 14. And finding nice stuff my size - and that isn’t “Grandma” style is hard. I have tried LOL!! I have to start job hunting soonish though, and the Job Service Agencies tend to help out in buying nice “work” clothes…so I might get a few outfits and reserve one for Mass and the other for Jobs.

 

[GregoryDracula]

Personally, I like it when people dress up more. Shows a little more inclination to me well dressed for your faith. - BUT- I’m not saying it makes anyone better, or I’d be offended if anyone didn’t. It’s my opinion that people look better well dressed anyway. So for me, I feel it’s a matter of personal opinion. I prefer people to dress well for church.

Another thing to consider if location. Here in Southern California (excepting now, now that it’s very cold again. ), here in SoCal, we usually have warm temperatures, and in Spring and Summer, usually the 78-85 F. range. Often air conditioning gets expensive, or breaks, and comfort levels can be tough to manage, even with open doors and windows. Thus, casual clothing is common here. Many people come in a shirt (often polo for slightly nicer appearance) and pants (at least it’s better than shirt and shorts, which is fairly common, to a degree), but many of the older generation (my parents, and older) typically dress nicer. I like to dress well, myself.

I suppose a few things have to factor in when deciding about your personal opinion on church appropriate wardrobe.

 

[dconklin]

I am not offended by how others dress. Please consider the poor. Should we have special “dumpy” clothes Masses for them? Do the best that you can.

 

[spunjalebi]

It seems to me alot of people here are coming up with alot of reasons why they should not dress up for Mass.

No, a lot of people are explaining why it’s not always feasible all the time, and frankly there is a difference between dressing modestly and dressing for ceremony. Which one does the Church tell us to be concerned with?

I’ll admit I don’t think it should have to be a dress for a woman but it sure well ought to modest clothing, pants or dresses. Alot of the pants women wear are not modest. They are way too tight. IMHO I feel Mass is no place for shorts on men or women. I, also, hate seeing a woman show up in sleeveless, short dresses. I’d rather see modest slacks.

Honestly I’d like to see where this is all happening. At the churches I’ve attended, it’s been far and in between that I’ve seen women in particular wearing immodest clothing. And most of the time, it’s been young girls to which I place blame on the parents. I also have several pairs of modest pants. They’re not that hard to find!

The comment alot are saying is that it just matters if I show up, it doesn’t matter how I dress. It is just what is in my heart. That’s like saying, “All right God, just be glad I’m here. I didn’t care how I looked. I didn’t take the time to care. I didn’t feel like dressing up for you, even though you are the reason I am. God, just be glad I’m here.” It sounds all humble and nice but it’s really alot of look at me, see how humble I am. I could only just get here. Pretty proud of being so humble. What is in your heart shows up externally. This will be demonstrated differently by different people but there should be at least some effort added.

Like I’ve said, along with what others have said before, if it is not feasible due to schedule, work, etc. it’s just not. My husband has showed up to church in his grungy construction worker clothes in the past. Missing church was not an option, nor was showing up very late. I will also admit, that due to my own schedule if I was able to bring along a nicer top I was, but it ended up being me halfway driving and pulling it over myself Not a safe way to drive, mind you.

Just because there are alot worse problems in the world doesn’t mean there isn’t a problem with the way people dress.

The question being begged is, why are we caring so much? Or even better, if it bothers us to much why don’t we do something positive and charitable about it?

One thing we should always remember, too, is we may never know what is going on in peoples lives and what occured in their lives on the way to Mass. So, all that said, imho, we should always care about how we appear before God but be careful how we judge the dress of others. We are all on a journey and on different parts of the path.

Ditto.

interesting how you cited the pagans as an example how people are dressing today.

Thanks for calling me a pagan-- NOT!

I’ll show up to Mass in my churidar and salwar, just for that comment. Go Indian pants!

 

[JReducation]

We have to be careful to avoid getting silly. You cannot come up with a universal dress code for mass for one simple reason, the Church is universal. That’s why the Church uses terms such as: modest, culturally appropriate, becoming and practical.

Many years ago, I was asked to be a visitator for our order. One of the countries that I visited was Papua New Guinea. Everyone wore shorts and a short-sleeve shirt indigenous clothing. Even the cops wear shorts. The reason was simple. It’s hot as Hades there and very humid. They don’t have central air conditioning, because it’s too expensive. Then I went to visit our houses in Ecuador, South America. Everyone wore long pants. Women wore either pants or skirts. The Native Americans wore indigenous clothing. The difference is that Ecuadorians have a very simple custom. Shorts are for sports and children. Normally, adults do not wear shorts unless they are in the privacy of their homes. In the lowlands, where it’s hot most of the year, people use fans. From there I went to visit our houses in India. The clothing varied from one culture to another. There was one interesting note. Indian women of means wear a very short top with the belly exposed and a sari, usually made of silk or other fine cloth. It’s very elegant and considered to be finery.

The point is that we cannot say that one form of dress is superior to another and impose it on the universal Church. That would not work. You would be imposing a culture that is foreign to some people. Persian and Arabic Catholics wear robes, especially the women. They look very much like the Muslims. However, what American Catholic would feel comfortable dressing that way? We associate these veils and robes with Islam, not with Persia and Arabia. Many of these people associate our way of dress with Western Imperialism, not with Catholicism. Even in Asia, European dress is a form of business attire and the great metro areas, not the dress of the common man and woman who lives in the smaller towns and cities. You’ll find skirts, shirts and ties in Tokyo, Saul, Hong Kong and other large metro areas. These areas are very western in their dress, not other areas. The same is true in South America, Africa, the Middle East, certain parts of Europe and the USA.

I grew up in a small southern town. People wore very sensible clothing to church, but nothing that we would consider dressy by big city standards. Our Sunday best was a pair of slacks or a good pair of jeans with polo or a button-down shirt. We wore boots or Oxford shoes for church and school. Those of us who were Jewish were the only ones who wore suits for worship, but that’s not a common form of dress in Judaism. It was the Hassidic and Sephardic Jews who adopted this form of dress to distinguish us from the Gentiles.

Appropriate dress for church is important. But let us remember that we do not all share the same culture, even if we do share the same faith. The common denominator is to dress appropriately, not identically.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[spunjalebi]

What JReducation said:thumbsup:

 

[Ashurie]

What JReducation said:thumbsup:

Hear Hear!!