Do you think Mormonism is a religion of "frenzied activity"?

[Eliza10]

I’d like others’ opinion that this is so (or not). I have noticed this about my good Mormon friend, and as I have observed her life much I can say with authority that her life, which very intertwined with her LDS ward, is one of frenzied activity. She is often exhausted. She does many good things, and is involved in much church service.

I once saw a Mormon on “Design Star”; she was voted off on this particular episode because she exhausted herself so much on her room design that she had to lay down on the floor and be fanned and ministered to by her helping co-workers. She was criticized for not pacing herself. She so much reminded me of my Mormon friend who exhausts herself to a standstill (or, “lay still”) on a regular basis.

And just now I was reading ex-Mormon stories, and this writer tells of his Ecuadorian Mission experience, saying:

"As it has evolved, the Mormon religion is a fully North American invention, and the way it is structured fits the fast-paced type of lifestyle that is fairly typical for most US citizens. Life in Ecuador, and Latin America in general, does not run at that same kind of pace, and does not lend itself well to the sort of frenzied activity that is required by membership in the church. As a result, we as missionaries found ourselves constantly in the position of having to gently (and sometimes not so gently) prod our local converts to action."

I have another thought about this quote, however, I will put it in another thread, since it’s a separate thought.

 

[PaulDupre]

I joined the LDS when I was 21 years old (1975). I left 11 years later. That 11 years was full of non-stop frenzied activity. I was out doing church callings nearly every night. Between work, church meetings and church callings I had no time for my family. I also never had time to reflect or think clearly.

That is one of the techniques that groups like the Mormons use to keep the members in line, They keep you so busy and so involved with other Mormons that you are never exposed to other ways of thinking and never have the chance to reflect and evaluate. And if you do ever get a moment, you are so tired that you only want to sleep.

I liken my years as a Mormon to being a caged hamster on a wheel, running and running and getting nowhere.

 

[Wooly_Wolf]

Thats why they call themselves “busy bees” and why there are so many references to bee’s here in Utah.

 

[Eliza10]

I joined the LDS when I was 21 years old (1975). I left 11 years later. That 11 years was full of non-stop frenzied activity. I was out doing church callings nearly every night. Between work, church meetings and church callings I had no time for my family. I also never had time to reflect or think clearly.

That is one of the techniques that groups like the Mormons use to keep the members in line, They keep you so busy and so involved with other Mormons that you are never exposed to other ways of thinking and never have the chance to reflect and evaluate. And if you do ever get a moment, you are so tired that you only want to sleep…

Wow. Thanks for that witness. I really appreciate it. This reflects what I have seen in my freind. I admire her activity, as many times its servcie - or keeping her home in perfect condition at all times - (is that also a Mormon thing? Between visiting teachers and entertaining missionaries I guess you want to be ready for drop-ins at any time).

You “never had time to think clearly”. I have noticed this about my friend, who thinks extremely clearly when it comes to juggling her packed schedule; however, I’ve known her for quite some time and rarely discuss faith issues, and she has very little attention for it when we do. And she also, when she “gets a moment”, only wants to sleep!

I liken my years as a Mormon to being a caged hamster on a wheel, running and running and getting nowhere.

Wow. That’s sobering. Because it reminds me of my friend.

 

[Eliza10]

Thats why they call themselves “busy bees” and why there are so many references to bee’s here in Utah.

Sometimes I wonder if the military doesn’t favor Mormons when they are making selections, say, for desired spots like Westpoint Acadamy. Because as a culture you could count on them to be be willing to work without question, and accept authority without question, and be blindly loyal.

 

[dianaiad]

Sometimes I wonder if the military doesn’t favor Mormons when they are making selections, say, for desired spots like Westpoint Acadamy. Because as a culture you could count on them to be be willing to work without question, and accept authority without question, and be blindly loyal.

I believe that the military, the FBI and the CIA have historically liked both Mormons and Catholics for a percieved set of attributes: loyalty, patriotism and honesty.

Mormonism is a way of life. We don’t pretend otherwise. We meet for three hours on Sundays, officially, and are constantly encouraged to be of service to others. We have Boy Scouts, and stuff to do during the week that involves helping other members of the ward and other people, period.

I am not going to apologize for that, AT all. One thing, though—if any Mormon claims that he or she 'doesn’t have time for family," then that’s not the church’s fault. Family is first for us, always and forever. Any Mormon who is doing so much ‘other stuff’ that family suffers needs to rethink priorities, and cut out the stuff that is interfering.

I notice that one of the things y’all have failed to mention is that we have one day a week that is sacrosanct TO the family; no outside church work is to be done on Monday nights (or whatever night the family chooses…but we can depend that nobody from the church is going to ask you for anything on Mondays) Family night is for the family, no matter how busy you might be the rest of the week.

Are we a very busy people? Yep.

That’s why we can accomplish all the things we accomplish, and why we sleep well at night.

…and there is nothing at all wrong with that.

 

[Eliza10]

I believe that the military, the FBI and the CIA have historically liked both Mormons and Catholics for a percieved set of attributes: loyalty, patriotism and honesty.

Mormonism is a way of life. We don’t pretend otherwise. We meet for three hours on Sundays, officially, and are constantly encouraged to be of service to others. We have Boy Scouts, and stuff to do during the week that involves helping other members of the ward and other people, period.

I am not going to apologize for that, AT all. One thing, though—if any Mormon claims that he or she 'doesn’t have time for family," then that’s not the church’s fault. Family is first for us, always and forever. Any Mormon who is doing so much ‘other stuff’ that family suffers needs to rethink priorities, and cut out the stuff that is interfering.

I notice that one of the things y’all have failed to mention is that we have one day a week that is sacrosanct TO the family; no outside church work is to be done on Monday nights (or whatever night the family chooses…but we can depend that nobody from the church is going to ask you for anything on Mondays) Family night is for the family, no matter how busy you might be the rest of the week.

Are we a very busy people? Yep.

That’s why we can accomplish all the things we accomplish, and why we sleep well at night.

…and there is nothing at all wrong with that.

It is a very admirable way of life in many ways, as you attest. And for the large part, I have admired my friends’ way of life. The Monday Family Night is a great practice. But also I have red flags, which I mention here.

Have you never had the feeling you were a hamster on the wheel? At times? I bet my friend does, because she sure looks like it sometimes.

If you mean you sleep well because your conscience is clear (because you feel in your conscience you are in the right religion), then I commend you that.

But do you really always sleep well?? My friend sleeps well sometimes, but frequently she has run herself ragged with her busy schedule and is too overtired and cannot sleep when she very much needs to.

 

[Eliza10]

And before long my friend’s children will be hitting high school and she will be starting many years of driving them across town every single morning of the weekdays to an hour long class - yes, thats before every. single. school. day. – then driving them back across town to school, before she starts her day!

I am expecting to see dark circles under her eyes and lots of grey hair!

 

[dianaiad]

It is a very admirable way of life in many ways, as you attest. And for the large part, I have admired my friends’ way of life. The Monday Family Night is a great practice. But also I have red flags, which I mention here.

Have you never had the feeling you were a hamster on the wheel? At times? I bet my friend does, because she sure looks like it sometimes.

If you mean you sleep well because your conscience is clear (because you feel in your conscience you are in the right religion) than I commend you that.

But do you really always sleep well?? My friend sleeps well sometimes, but frequently she has run herself ragged with her busy schedule and is too overtired and cannot sleep when she very much needs to.

Then your friend needs to prioritize. Your friend has a problem because of her own drives, not because the church ‘makes her.’

On the other hand, I’ve got quite a few non-Mormon friends that I can see are in pretty much the same boat; they have children that they take to soccer games, dance lessons, music lessons, playdates (now there’s a concept that has always boggled my mind…) and tutoring sessions. They work at their own jobs then come home and take care of their families and their homes. They are expected to be perfect mothers, perfect career women, perfect wives, perfect whatever—and their religion doesn’t even enter into it. None of them have time for that.

(shrug)

I think you are taking an American problem and making it a Mormon one. The CHURCH does not demand that we kill ourselves or drive ourselves nuts. It is perfectly acceptable to say 'no, I can’t do this now."

 

[MelanieAnne]

I can see both sides here. While it is true, at least from what I have seen among my Mormon friends, that active membership in the LDS church keeps people very busy, virtually eliminating most other social life, it is also true that there are people who by their nature/personality tend towards what I call “compulsive busy-ness”.

Sometimes this “compulsive busy-ness” is a habit that has its roots in some sort of personal problem, such as grief over a loss that compels one to “stay busy” in order to keep ones mind off the sadness. It can easily evolve into a habit long after the loss is years in the past. Other times it may just be how someone is. I don’t know that you can lay this phenomenon entirely at the door of the LDS church. They DO keep their people very busy, but some of it may just be the choices of the individuals involved too.

 

[Eliza10]

Then your friend needs to prioritize. Your friend has a problem because of her own drives, not because the church ‘makes her.’

Maybe. But I see the pulls of her Church always being there. Like the coming daily morning classes I mentioned. Wow.

On the other hand, I’ve got quite a few non-Mormon friends that I can see are in pretty much the same boat; they have children that they take to soccer games, dance lessons, music lessons, playdates (now there’s a concept that has always boggled my mind…)

LOL! Well I have heard that, as I have an only, and I am a single Mom, divorced. Both create isolatiioon, and I have to be proactive against it, and “playdates” and making sure my child has a social life has been part of my agenda. But I have heard that “boggled mind” reaction before from those of another generation, or from those married with larger families…

… and tutoring sessions. They work at their own jobs then come home and take care of their families and their homes. They are expected to be perfect mothers, perfect career women, perfect wives, perfect whatever—and their religion doesn’t even enter into it. None of them have time for that.

(shrug)

I think you are taking an American problem and making it a Mormon one. The CHURCH does not demand that we kill ourselves or drive ourselves nuts. It is perfectly acceptable to say 'no, I can’t do this now."

Yes, many other Americans have the too busy, too scheduled" problem, and it is just as you describe. But it goes back to my original quote from the ex-Mormon, above, "As it has evolved, the Mormon religion is a fully North American invention, and the way it is structured fits the fast-paced type of lifestyle that is fairly typical for most US citizens"

 

[RebeccaJ]

The Mormons friends I know who are super busy with church stuff, do so out of choice. They’ve accepted what they’re doing and have turned down what they feel they don’t have time for.

 

[Eliza10]

…Sometimes this “compulsive busy-ness” is a habit that has its roots in some sort of personal problem, such as grief over a loss that compels one to “stay busy” in order to keep ones mind off the sadness. It can easily evolve into a habit long after the loss is years in the past. .

Yes, this is very true!

…Other times it may just be how someone is. I don’t know that you can lay this phenomenon entirely at the door of the LDS church. They DO keep their people very busy, but some of it may just be the choices of the individuals involved too.

See the original quote in purple and green. Its just waying that the Mormon culture fits with our American culture (while maybe not with other cultures as well). This is the observation of an ex-Mormon who did his mission in Eucador. His story is very interesting, by the way, if you want to read it, here: exmormon.org/whylft19.htm

 

[Eliza10]

The Mormons friends I know who are super busy with church stuff, do so out of choice. They’ve accepted what they’re doing and have turned down what they feel they don’t have time for.

Then maybe it is, as dianaid says, a matter of prioritizing or time management.

 

[Publisher]

I am always amazed at the “criticisms” others make toward those of another tradition…I must confess…I never read the “you’re too involved in your church” as a criticism of one tradition toward another.

 

[tomarin]

I can see both sides here. While it is true, at least from what I have seen among my Mormon friends, that active membership in the LDS church keeps people very busy, virtually eliminating most other social life, it is also true that there are people who by their nature/personality tend towards what I call “compulsive busy-ness”.

Good point. Some people like being busy. I’m more of a wool-gatherer, myself.

 

[dianaiad]

Maybe. But I see the pulls of her Church always being there. Like the coming daily morning classes I mentioned. Wow.

I missed that. Do you mean she teaches Seminary, or that she has teenagers that she drives there? I’m all for Seminary, for many different reasons. As a former student…because I got scripture study every day, was able to be with friends who shared my values, and was then better able to deal with the very different and stressful atmosphere of a huge California high school. As a Mom doing the driving, I appreciated it for very much the same reason: time with my children, scripture study in quiet on those days when it was my turn to drive the kids to school from Seminary, and a great way to begin the day.

Now that I have a teaching credential, I’m thinking seriously of applying to become a Seminary teacher–for very much the same reasons as stated above.

LOL! Well I have heard that, as I have an only, and I am a single Mom, divorced. Both create isolatiioon, and I have to be proactive against it, and “playdates” and making sure my child has a social life has been part of my agenda. But I have heard that “boggled mind” reaction before from those of another generation, or from those married with larger families…

I was also a single Mom, widowed. Since I am 60, I probably am from a ‘different generation,’ and I do have five kids. Still…well, I guess the question is…who do you arrange your ‘playdates’ with? Kids YOUR kid wants to play with, or kids you want him/her to play with? How in the world do they WORK? Structured games where the adults tell the kids what and how to play?

nevermind. Let’s just leave it as ‘I don’t get it,’ and let it go.

Yes, many other Americans have the too busy, too scheduled" problem, and it is just as you describe. But it goes back to my original quote from the ex-Mormon, above, "As it has evolved, the Mormon religion is a fully North American invention, and the way it is structured fits the fast-paced type of lifestyle that is fairly typical for most US citizens"

OK…and your point is?

Religious faith is part of the culture it inhabits, and the culture it inhabits is a part of it. For instance, Catholic culture is extremely full of symbolism in their parishes and cathedrals. You use statues, candles, liturgical garb, censors, specific wording in the Mass, specific prayers, rosaries, mode of dress for church attendence…all the things that are very much a part of Catholic CULTURE, not scriptural doctrine. None of the things I have mentioned argue against the truths you believe, though, do they?

In fact, they help you deal with and understand the doctrines and precepts of your faith.

In sum, Christianity as a whole was, for longer than the Mormons have been around, specifically a Jewish, then Roman, religion. It grew.

 

[dianaiad]

I am always amazed at the “criticisms” others make toward those of another tradition…I must confess…I never read the “you’re too involved in your church” as a criticism of one tradition toward another.

(grin)

I get that a lot, though.

It’s one of the standards.

 

[MelanieAnne]

(grin)

I get that a lot, though.

It’s one of the standards.

If we keep this up the unusual weather patterns in California are going to make the national news!

 

[PaulDupre]

The Mormons friends I know who are super busy with church stuff, do so out of choice. They’ve accepted what they’re doing and have turned down what they feel they don’t have time for.

I was never told that I had a choice to turn down a calling. Quite the opposite, in fact. We were always told that the leaders were inspired and the calling was directly from God. To turn it down would have been to show a lack of “testimony”.

Maybe with the current mass exodus out the LDS church they are starting to wise up and let up a bit on the pressure. I hope so for the sake of the LDS in my extended family.