Do You Typically Confess To The Same Priest?

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Seamus_L

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I’m comfortable with just about all of the ones I went to in 2010, but I wouldn’t want to go to the same priest every time. I believe last year I went to about 10 or 11. Going to one, I believe would begin to seriously inhibit me.
 
I have been going to the same priest for years. He knows me so well that almost anything I confess doesn’t surprise him. I find the fact that he knows me well outside of the confessional as well, helps him to give me the best advice and counsel.
 
I don’t go that often and when I do - different priest each time. I usually go to the cathedral of the diocese.
 
I had the fear of one a while ago. I just tell myself that it is the lord in there and not the man, and it helps me out.
 
yes, having the same priest as confessor and spiritual director has probably been the most helpful thing I have ever done that has improved my experience with the sacrament of confession. I don’t know what you mean by “inhibited”. Once you get over seeing the priest as an individual and realize every encounter with every priest in confession is an encounter with Christ himself, that difficulty disappears.
 
What does it matter if you go to the same priest every time? I do. Just think of him as our Lord and it will be much easier since He already knows what you’ve done and wants to hear it come out of your mouth. The priest hears confessions all the time and dosn’t (or at least shouldn’t) ever judge someone based on their sins. I will say however that I could never do a face-to-face confession. I like my privacy;)
 
I used to, now he’s retired and we have a new priest. I’ll miss having a priest who ‘knows my story’ but I look forward to sharing with the new guy. Sometimes there are certain people you can really talk to about certain things. And a familiar confessor is just so special. This new guy and I have already chatted outside of the confessional, and we get along, so I’m very optimistic.
 
I nearly always confess to (through) the same Priest; to the same God, who judges and knows everything already. Occasionally, I seek reconciliation at another parish, but that is only if I am running short on time or are in another parish.

Priests will often tell you that their advice can only be very general in nature and cannot be tailored to your spiritual needs unless they are your regular confessor. This is the blessing of having a regular confessor. He is the doctor of your soul, and you only have one primary doctor, right? Why would you go to a different doctor each time - especially for the same illness?

To the OP: please tell your local confessor about your anxiety. He can help, as you are not the first one to mention this to him.
 
I’m blessed with a Catholic community that affords many different opportunities for confession. And I rotate. I try not to go to the same priest more than once every three months.

I know this isn’t recommended practice at CAF, but the last time I went to the same priest frequently enough for him to “get a bead” on me, he ended up feeling confident enough to suggest that I was involved in some sins which I was emphatically not involved in. Suggested, in fact, that what I needed to do was go to confession less often, which was, in my opinion, a grave misreading of my situation. I was so shaken – and angry – that I didn’t go to confession or communion for several months.

Thing is, we confess to God, and God is infallible. But we do confess through a priest, and priests are fallible. They make mistakes all the time right there in the confessional, and those mistakes, at such a vulnerable moment, can have pretty serious effects. I do hope to have a regular confessor someday, but that man is going to be someone I can trust – not just as a minister of the Sacraments, but as a wise counselor and a friend.

Make no mistake, OP: if you can find such a priest, it is a great spiritual boon. But don’t trust yourself to the first priest you happen to bump into in the confessional. That’s my advice, anyway.
 
I don’t always go to the same one, but I keep it within a small number of local priests. Because of the job I have, I know most of the local priests quite well, so they all know my background and story and I have confessed to each of them regularly enough for them to know how to help me.

Once, when I had something I was really embarrassed about to confess, I went to a different priest who was unknown to me. I wouldn’t really reccommend this in general but I do believe it was appropriate for that situation - it was a one-off sin which I would not (please God) be in danger of falling into, or near occasions thereof, as a habit. The only other time I had something I was that embarrassed about, I went to one of my regular confessors and said it right at the beginning, then went on with the rest of my confession. The priest obviously knew it had been a big deal for me, so he didn’t mention it at all in the advice he gave me, whereas I would have preferred for him to say something about it. My point is that I guess you have to do what seems right for your particular circumstances, but in general it’s better to have a regular confessor.

po18guy - this analogy is also exactly what I do with doctors! I’m registered with a general practice and when I need an appointment, I’ll take the first one available with any of the doctors. They all know me well enough to sort me out! Equally, I wouldn’t go to a stranger.
 
90% of the time I go to the same one. The times I don’t, either he isn’t hearing confessions, or hasn’t entered the confessional yet by the time I find a priest to hear my confessions (I have someone drop me off/pick me up, so I don’t have the luxury of waiting another 5 or 10 minutes). On occasions, I do go to a different priest.
 
I confess regulary to the parish priest and he begins to know my story. I find it very helpful and comfortable. But i also try to think of the place filled with The Lords grace when i confess.
 
Yes, I try to. The priest is very good at giving spiritual direction, and for those uncomfortable sins the knowledge that I go to the same fellow assists me in not sinning.
 
I go always to the same priest if possible. This is the only way to receive some spiritual direction. My sins won’t be better in different priest hears them every time.
 
I like to go to the same priest all the time. I had one confessor for 17 years, then one for 4 years. When the four-year guy became unavailable, it took me a year and a half to find my present confessor, and it was worth every agonizing minute and every miserable, misunderstood confession. He understood perfectly from the very first time. I prefer confessing behind the screen, but I tell him who I am. Once I went by appointment face to face, and it was OK, too. I am so grateful!
 
Wowbagger said:
I’m blessed with a Catholic community that affords many different opportunities for confession. And I rotate. I try not to go to the same priest more than once every three months.

I know this isn’t recommended practice at CAF, but the last time I went to the same priest frequently enough for him to “get a bead” on me, he ended up feeling confident enough to suggest that I was involved in some sins which I was emphatically not involved in. Suggested, in fact, that what I needed to do was go to confession less often, which was, in my opinion, a grave misreading of my situation. I was so shaken – and angry – that I didn’t go to confession or communion for several months.

Make no mistake, OP: if you can find such a priest, it is a great spiritual boon. But don’t trust yourself to the first priest you happen to bump into in the confessional. That’s my advice, anyway.
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I must point out that mere suggestions are far from accusations. In fact, they are part of the inquiry process into your spiritual state. Do you become as upset at your doctor’s probing (and perhaps embarrassing) questions? If not, it might be good to ponder why the priest’s questions or suggestions are so bothering. Both are healers, are they not?

Yes, we confess through a priest, but he sits in persona Christi. So, we are hearing the priest, but we should be listening to Christ. And Christ was certainly direct, to the point, and unafraid to offend, since eternal damnation was hanging in the balance.
 
Every Advent and Lent there are confession services in our archdiocese in every RC parish. I would go to my RC parish then, there would be at least 4 different priests. I just randomly go to whoever has the shortest line, but would avoid the parish pastor 😃

But any time of the year I would go to the pastor if there is a need to go to confession.
 
I go to a Byzantine parish and the confessions there are face to face. I know both priests very well and I confess reguarly to them. I noticed that they go into a “doctor” mode when in confession. They listen to the sins, give direction and assign penance. they always do a wonderful job and its never been “weird” because they don’t try to remember what you did and then hold it aganist you. One of them is my spiritual director and the confessions have helped him be a more effective spiritual director to me.
 
po18guy said:
I must point out that mere suggestions are far from accusations. In fact, they are part of the inquiry process into your spiritual state. Do you become as upset at your doctor’s probing (and perhaps embarrassing) questions? If not, it might be good to ponder why the priest’s questions or suggestions are so bothering. Both are healers, are they not?
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When I wrote, “suggest”, I was really only trying to use a softer word for “accuse.” Inquiry is, of course, something to be expected and even hoped for. This was different.

If a doctor told me I had a broken leg and I didn’t, I would find a different doctor. While a priest does sit in persona Christi, and while their authority is to be respected and heeded, and while their ministry of the Sacraments is an absolute necessity, if we’ve learned anything since Vatican II, it’s that our priests are (by and large) a long, long way from actually being Christi.

And so I counsel caution.
 
Wowbagger said:
When I wrote, “suggest”, I was really only trying to use a softer word for “accuse.” Inquiry is, of course, something to be expected and even hoped for. This was different.

If a doctor told me I had a broken leg and I didn’t, I would find a different doctor. While a priest does sit in persona Christi, and while their authority is to be respected and heeded, and while their ministry of the Sacraments is an absolute necessity, if we’ve learned anything since Vatican II, it’s that our priests are (by and large) a long, long way from actually being Christi.
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Fair enough. Some certainly do have difficulty locating a spiritually satisfying confessor. I pray that you are so blessed now.
 
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