Does a child have to wait for formal "First Communion" with their class?

[graceandglory]

My two oldest children each made their first Communion independantly from their ‘class’.

My oldest son wanted to have a good friend of mine who was recently ordained give him FHC. Since he was not available to concelebrate at the ‘class’ Mass, we asked our pastor about having my son recieve at another Mass and my pastor had no problem with that.

My eldest daughter was due to make her FHC almost two years ago. Our family was fortunate enought to get tickets to the Papal Mass in Wash DC. Since that was before the ‘class’ FHC, our pastor, on his own, suggested that my daughter make her FHC prior so she could recieve at the Papal Mass.

He would have had no problems with her actually recieving her FHC AT the papal Mass, but there was no guarentee that it would be a priest that she recieved from ( which was quite correct, the majority of the MHC’s were deacons were we were at.)

Thank you Brendan, for your story. That would be our situation. Well, not exactly a papal Mass, but something special and significant to our family.

 

[Big_Ro]

Not your post in particular, I should have snipped to make that clear.

However, the biggest obstacle to celebrating the Sacrament of Confirmation at the age the Church has set for it the “rite of passage” mentality that developed over the last generation or so (actually I must admit that the roost of that mentality go back to the problematic raising of the age for Communion before the turn of last century, see Quam Singulari).

Reception of the Sacraments should be based on understanding, not age (although the understanding typical of a 7-year-old is the standard for Confirmation, along with Confession and Communion). They aren’t envisioned in the Church documents as being the milestones of a formation process, but in many ways the beginning of the lifelong course of the faith.

Beyond the fact that there isn’t the distribution through time and that understanding, not age, is supposed to be the determining factor, I guess I would have to point to the “graduating from Church” phenomenon that I have heard from people in several parishes (even before the Confirmation liturgy).

Okay. I appreciate your explanation. I more appreciate that you didn’t beat me up with your knowledge. If I understand you, you are saing that understanding is the criteria and not age alone. Still, your post points out that age and ability to understand are very closely related. So, I would argue that the difference is minimal. I agree that understanding is crucial, regardless of age

 

[Phemie]

Okay. I appreciate your explanation. I more appreciate that you didn’t beat me up with your knowledge. If I understand you, you are saing that understanding is the criteria and not age alone. Still, your post points out that age and ability to understand are very closely related. So, I would argue that the difference is minimal. I agree that understanding is crucial, regardless of age

I think that what he was trying to point out was that the “Good, now that my kid’s been ‘done’ (Confirmed) he’s through with religious education” mentality is what has resulted in dioceses raising the age for Confirmation to late adolescence when the Church envisions it happening around the age of 7. Rather than being seen as just another step in the journey, it’s seen as the culmination of the journey.

As to the OP’s question, when our oldest was ready for First Communion our parish process was to have parents prepare their own child, with occasional group liturgies for all the families who were preparing. Once the child had done the workbook, there was an interview with the pastor who, upon confirming that the child understood what was going to happen, gave permission for reception of Communion at any time. For several weeks, each Sunday saw one or two families presenting children for the sacrament. Then at the end of the school year we had one Sunday where all the children were acknowledged and those who hadn’t yet received finally did so.

 

[SMHW]

SMHW;5995596:

This is a matter to be discussed with your pastor.
How old was your daughter when you made your profession of faith? (I am discerning that you, your spouse, and your daughter were baptized non-Catholics?) I’m guessing that either your daughter was over the age of reason or was so close to it that she would not be able to complete First Sacrament classes before reaching the age of reason.

Thanks, SMHW, she was 4 at her Catholic baptism. Her brothers were 12. I have later learned that a couple of canonical mistakes occurred around their sacraments of initiation, but not related to her, at least I don’t think so.

OK, so your daughter was baptized as an “infant”. You evidently chose to have her wait to start the first sacraments classes. These usually start in the first grade (at least in the United States) and go for two years. Did I read in another post that you are a single parent? I realize that the expense of classes (in places where you have to pay a fee) can be a great hardship for single parents so maybe that is why.

You have probably noticed from other posts that there are some differences in the way things are done which are based on the individual parishes. The size of the parish and the number of support staff/volunteers often has something to do with it. A larger size might mean there are more options …or it can mean more rigidity. Smaller parishes might have a less structured approach …but they might have a more singular view as to how things are done.

What (if anything) does your parish say about how daughter could/should/ought/must/? receive her First Communion?

 

[agapewolf]

No, agape wolf. we didn’t. As I stated, my kids are converts, and were all standing when they were baptized. I see the white gown significance in baptism and a bridal gown, but I don’t really see the significance in the first communion GOWN.

Honestly I don’t have any issues really with it really…it is a huge production, but these aren’t people we know. For a single mom, it is a HUGE financial burden to participate in something that will be showy and crowded, and well, honestly, not really personal, as Eucharist should be.

You did not even have an alb or a white coverlet over your clothes? It is even written in the funeral rite about covering the casket with a pall just as one wore white with the baptism. The garment is very important in significance of the rites of the sacraments. First communion white dress (I’ve never ever ever seen a first communion girl in a gown) ties it together.

 

[kage_ar]

Honestly I don’t have any issues really with it really…it is a huge production, but these aren’t people we know. For a single mom, it is a HUGE financial burden to participate in something that will be showy and crowded, and well, honestly, not really personal, as Eucharist should be.

There should be no expense. She simply wears a dress, every Parish I know of has white dresses that can be borrowed.

The Eucharist is about communion - that includes community.

Talk to your Pastor, he will guide you.

 

[StrawberryJam]

If you read my OP, you would have know that she is NOT the same age as the other girls, and that she doesn’t even know any of them.

Sorry you were not divulging enough information for anyone to address properly here. Perhaps you should have made everyone aware of all the details evolved so that they would not irritate you by caring enough to respond to this, which should be responded to by your parish priest, who I would expect could and should answer this for you if you really did even care.

 

[CDNowak]

Sorry you were not divulging enough information for anyone to address properly here. Perhaps you should have made everyone aware of all the details evolved so that they would not irritate you by caring enough to respond to this, which should be responded to by your parish priest, who I would expect could and should answer this for you if you really did even care.

Yes, putting something in the OP is withholding information.

 

[Catholic90]

My daughter …older than the rest of the kids receiving the sacraments…doesn’t even attend any classes with them, so she doesn’t know them.

If you think it won’t be depriving her of an experience that all the girls her age will be going through, …Just rob her of all the possible joy she may be able to have along with her peers. Sounds good to me.

If you read my OP, you would have know that she is NOT the same age as the other girls, and that she doesn’t even know any of them.

Sorry you were not divulging enough information for anyone to address properly here. Perhaps you should have made everyone aware of all the details evolved so that they would not irritate you by caring enough to respond to this, which should be responded to by your parish priest, who I would expect could and should answer this for you if you really did even care.

Snippy, snippy, SJ. :slapfight: Having a bad day? :hug1:The OP seemingly DID divulge the info in the OP…methinks you read it too quickly or not carefully enough. It happens A LOT on these boards, as we are all very busy, trying to juggle 10,000 things to keep life on track.

So let’s review…the girl does NOT attend classes, does NOT know her classmates (because she HAS NONE), and she is older anyway. These are NOT her peers.

Seems to me that if the priest is OK with it, she will find far more joy in receiving Jesus now than in waiting to receive with a bunch of kids whom she does not know and who have no significance to her.

 

[graceandglory]

Snippy, snippy, SJ. :slapfight: Having a bad day? :hug1:The OP seemingly DID divulge the info in the OP…methinks you read it too quickly or not carefully enough. It happens A LOT on these boards, as we are all very busy, trying to juggle 10,000 things to keep life on track.

So let’s review…the girl does NOT attend classes, does NOT know her classmates (because she HAS NONE), and she is older anyway. These are NOT her peers.

Seems to me that if the priest is OK with it, she will find far more joy in receiving Jesus now than in waiting to receive with a bunch of kids whom she does not know and who have no significance to her.

The wisdom of Solomon! Thank you Catholic90. I stopped posting cause I already got my response days ago… (and I really don’t come here to fight)

Not sure what we’re gonna do, like I said, it’s not a really big deal for me, I was just wondering…

God bless, and thanks to all who responded. (without judging me for asking)