Does anyone like NFP?

[Mary_Gail_36]

Hi StratusRose,

I like it because I have never had a regular period, It would be regular for 5 months in a row, then I would have a very long cycle sometimes 6 or 7 weeks apart.

I use Billings and after learning it, I realized that I already had a rudimentary knowledge of it, because that is how figure out when my period is due.

Compared to other methods, I unfortunately was not always a practicing Catholic. Condoms are not spontaneous, and in my experience fail pretty often.

The Pill changes your whole body and mind. I took it for ovarian cysts for a period of time, and I think part of the reason that it works is that you become so moody, that your husband wants to stay away from you!

So truthfully, I like NFP. It’s a little complicated in the beginning, and I sort of wish they would come out with one that tells you exactly when you are ovulating.

So don’t worry.

 

[monicatholic]

**I just wanted to see if there were couples out there who live out these ideals. **

Hi Stratus Rose,

My husband and I like NFP first and MOSTLY because it forces us to reject the automatic presumption that avoidance of pregnancy is the unchallenged goal. That shift in thinking does more to bring my husband and i together in likemindedness and unity than does the abstinence, charting and NFP logistics. It reminds us of God’s meaning for our marriage.

So the successful avoidance of pregnancy is really not an ideal of NFP unless there is serious reason for it.

When we had our own chart-defying pregnancy, i learned to love NFP even more. considered by most as an NFP ‘failure’ it gave my husband and i the opportunity to really pause and regroup. we thought we had serious reason to avoid pregnancy, and here was God using our openness to life to bring another child into the world!! had ABC failed in that way, we would have been crushed. but because NFP ‘failed’ and resulted in pregnancy, we eventually, together, arrived at the powerful conclusion that God so willed it all- not only the baby, but the learning we had acquired.

long story short: after we soon got over the worry/fear/feeling of being duped by God/ fustration/ that pregnancy brought us to a wonderful place of sensing God’s special attention on us.

then we birthed her, our ninth kid (who’s now nearly 5,) and she’s every lovely, cute, brilliant, funny, loving thing that God created her to be.

I really coulda answered the initial question a lot more succinctly: yes. we like NFP, but maybe for reasons not so often mentioned.

 

[Em_in_FL]

We LOVE NFP!.. it’s been such a wonderful gift for our marriage!

7 years of marriage… and now on pregnancy #3, it’s allowed us to work with God in planning our family… when we were (prayerfully) ready… physically, mentally, financially, and spiritually…

LOVE LOVE LOVE NFP!!!

 

[LovingHim]

I don’t know that we should like it. NFP is supposed to be a sacrifice. A big one at that.

Usually sacrifice means it isn’t all that enjoyable.

I don’t think anyone is “bashing” NFP by being honest about the sacrifice. The difficulty, the frustration, or whatever other word one might use other than sacrifice.

In fact, I think the honesty is vital to the use of NFP, otherwise couples start to think they are nuts for feeling the way they do and may become resentful and revert or turn to ABC/sterilization.

**That said, NFP is a very good way to determine how serious one is about not having children for some reason at that time. Few couples would be willing to sacrifice the most desirable times for the marital embrace for long intervals without a truely good and strong reason. **

This is very well put!

 

[hasikelee]

I’ve used NFP since I learned it. I think all women should have the oppurtunity and encouragement to learn how to understand their feminine workings.

It helps in small ways, such as being aware of mood and energy, and big ways, such as finding issues with fertility, cancer, endometriosis, PCOD, etc.

Putting all the moral issues of birth control aside, and all the medical risks, one thing that particularly bothers me about oral contraceptives is how they shut down and hide the natural workings of a body. Why would anyone want to hide potential illness.

How about seasonale…where you get your period 2-4 times a year. Eeps! That seems so…unclean and unhealthy.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

**I am guilty of being frustrated with NFP and doing my fair share of complaining. BUT that doesn’t mean that I don’t like it. Since our only other moral option is complete abstinence, I am grateful for the gift of NFP. I am also amazed that I knew almost nothing about my own body and how it functions until I started learning about NFP!

NFP is only information. So our likes/dislikes about it will reflect where we are currently on our spiritual journey, the strength of our marriage, our faith in God etc. Some days I wish I had never had my eyes opened to the immorality of ABC…after all, it would be so much more convenient** for me. But then I slap myself and get on with my day

One thing I want to caution you about though is post partum NFP. It has been 18 months since we had our DD and it has been a very rough time. My fertility is virtually unreadable. It is very frustrating and if I didn’t have such a wonderful, faithful Catholic hubby we may have been divorced by now from all of the stress it has caused in our intimate life. We do have serious reasons to avoid right now though so I’m sure it’s easier if a couple is using it with a “if a surprise happen that’s ok” attitude.

Bottom line? I think NFP is a wonderful tool for women in general (just for the knowledge of our own bodies!) and for couples who have serious reasons to avoid. After all, the sacrifices of NFP shrink in direct proportion to the complications another pregnancy may bring.

Malia

 

[leonie]

Here’s the big plus to NFP–it revitalized our sex life!!

Abstaining can be very difficult, but it also increases the pleasure when we could be intimate. I would even say before we used NFP, sex was pretty routine–almost boring.

With the increased desire coupled with the anticipation of
phase III, it’s been a lot of fun. I like all the “courting” and “just you wait” comments in phase II.

It was a big surprise. I wasn’t expecting it to be fun.

 

[maria29]

We LOVE NFP!.. it’s been such a wonderful gift for our marriage!

7 years of marriage… and now on pregnancy #3, it’s allowed us to work with God in planning our family… when we were (prayerfully) ready… physically, mentally, financially, and spiritually…

LOVE LOVE LOVE NFP!!!

I think that this is an awesome way to put it. NFP has drawn my dh and I closer because we pray together about whether we’re ready or not. I also think the best thing about NFP is that its taught us patience and I don’t feel like some sex object to only fufill my dh desires.

 

[danimay]

For me, NFP is a lot like my period…I don’t enjoy it, but I can see the beauty in it.

 

[LovingHim]

For me, NFP is a lot like my period…I don’t enjoy it, but I can see the beauty in it.

This is a great way to think of it! I don’t like my period either, but, I love the fact that it means I have the awesome possibility of giving God another immortal soul this month. It’s all good.

 

[boppaid]

I am not married but have been charting creighton for 6 years now.

It has caught 2 major and 1 minor health issues with me, and now I’m discovering a 4th. The only way I can take the particular “medicine” (progesterone) is if I chart…so I know when I’m supposed to take it.

It was an a amazing experience when I first was learning it.

From my experience in discussions and counseling with couples, and of course I know there are exceptions to this…
but the couples that were chaste before marriage, and learned NFP before marriage, didn’t have much difficulty with it, and found it to be wonderful in their marriage. For the couples that converted in one way or another after marriage (whether they were not chaste previous to marriage, or used birth control during their marriage), in general, they had harder times with it.

This was me. I was not “chaste” before marriage, and I used various forms of abc as well. I had an extremely difficult time w/ NFP. I could not read my signs, and my dh was not really into learning. Also, I didn’t like only having sex at certain times of the month, because if dh or I didn’t happen to be “in the mood”, it felt forced and blah. I like being more spontaneous. We are able to have sex when we actually WANT to have it. It’s been nice.

 

[CatholicSam]

I’ve used NFP since I learned it. I think all women should have the oppurtunity and encouragement to learn how to understand their feminine workings.

It helps in small ways, such as being aware of mood and energy, and big ways, such as finding issues with fertility, cancer, endometriosis, PCOD, etc.

Putting all the moral issues of birth control aside, and all the medical risks, one thing that particularly bothers me about oral contraceptives is how they shut down and hide the natural workings of a body. Why would anyone want to hide potential illness.

How about seasonale…where you get your period 2-4 times a year. Eeps! That seems so…unclean and unhealthy.

I really enjoyed learning NFP and charting for several, several months prior to marriage. I agree that it’s a huge plus to be able to know what’s going on with your body!

As for seasonale, oh phooey! 2-4 periods a year? Try no periods for 4 years thanks to pregnancy and ecological breastfeeding If we manage to conceive baby #3 before the return of my cycles I can expect to have gone at least 6 years without menstruating, yeah!!!

(sorry if that last bit was TMI I just hate periods and getting away without them for this long puts a big smile on my face!)

 

[hasikelee]

I really enjoyed learning NFP and charting for several, several months prior to marriage. I agree that it’s a huge plus to be able to know what’s going on with your body!

As for seasonale, oh phooey! 2-4 periods a year? Try no periods for 4 years thanks to pregnancy and ecological breastfeeding If we manage to conceive baby #3 before the return of my cycles I can expect to have gone at least 6 years without menstruating, yeah!!!

(sorry if that last bit was TMI I just hate periods and getting away without them for this long puts a big smile on my face!)

Lol, that is a long time!

 

[mamacita]

We have had a positive NFP experience. Yes, we do have 4 kids but they were all ‘planned’ since we want a LARGE family.

STRATUS, if you ever want to talk about it, feel free to PM me, I’m here for ya!!

 

[ekblad7]

NFP may have saved our marriage. My husband was very much against having more children. He wanted to get “fixed”. We were little c Catholics at hte time. Anyway - we learned NFP and it opened us up to a whole new world. Not only realizing my fertile times and how to “avoid” pregnancy but also that we could be open to life (and should be). Alot has changed since then and we are both different people. Alot of our relationship problems went away when we started using NFP. Now we’re too lazy to use it so who knows how many kids we’ll end up with, LOL. But that’s OK.

 

[kage_ar]

There are many things that are good for us that we may not LIKE (at least not all of the time…)

Eating right
Exercise
Cleaning the house
Going to Mass (sometimes I just want to sleep in on the weekends)
Fasting/Abstaining from meat on Fridays

The list could be a mile long.

 

[Teakafrog]

There are many things that are good for us that we may not LIKE (at least not all of the time…)

Eating right
Exercise
Cleaning the house
Going to Mass (sometimes I just want to sleep in on the weekends)
Fasting/Abstaining from meat on Fridays

The list could be a mile long.

And from another perspective–what is there to ‘like’ about ABC? Non-hormonal methods are messy, you have to remember to buy them, etc. Hormonal methods, again you have to remember to take them, and they have horrible side effects, while destroying how your body regularly functions. What’s to like about any of that?

 

[catholic79]

I love and hate NFP. I started NFP in the hopes of conceiving when that didn’t happen I stopped charting, the reminder that I should be fertile was to much. That said I would NEVER go back to BC. NFP was better for me physically and for our marriage then BC ever was . Now we are just praying for a baby, I still know my signs but not writing them down and thinking, and thinking, and thinking about them has made me a much happier person

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

I think when people embrace NFP it is because they are living in line with the Catholic churches teaching that they invite MUCH grace into their lives. It is not the charting, temp taking, scheduling that brings a marriage closer, it is the abundant grace that is received from doing God’s will especially when it is hard.

**
I think you nailed it. If one is using NFP for “religious reasons” then we place more importance on God than on a “method”. Therefore the method, no matter how difficult it may be, is just another way for us to show God that we love Him and choose to follow Him. Like many other things we do for God in this world, it is not always easy or convenient.

malia**

 

[Footprints04]

I think that is a wonderful point. I imagine for making choice such as this…taking up what is a cross in Today’s World of different, opposite influences from the Church…there would be an outpouring of God’s grace. I think that would definitely be a wonderful thing for marriage!

Thank you for your posts everyone…I learned CrM in July because of health reasons (annovulatory cycle due to using bp for medical reasons…I am a virgin however). I stopped the bp in May of '06, gained a lot of weight from what was undiagnosed insulin resistance and didn’t have a period on my own for almost a year. Thanks to Dr. Hilgers at the Pope Paul Institute I am starting to get things on track!

My bf has been a wonderful help in all of this, helping me find drs to see, and coming with me to appointments. We remain chaste because we believe it is the right thing, and we plan to marry in a little less than 2 years…hopefully by then we will have my cycle figured out

I am happy to hear there are couples out there that find NFP a good thing and that they like it in their marriage. My bf and I have had very positive conversations about it, and some of the threads with negative comments about NFP made me feel sad.