Ex-Catholics

[dzheremi]

I think it’s common to see any disagreement by an “ex-” something as an attack. It’s not right, but it is common. Since I left RCism for Orthodoxy, I’ve been told by my former co-religionists that I’m “attacking” RCism when I disagree with it, even when it concerns things that I also disagreed with when I was still RC myself (e.g., certain excesses in Marian devotion that I saw around me). Luckily (?), the vast majority of Copts do not know enough about RCism to think of my background as anything but a positive, so the fact that it really was positive has been reinforced to me in my life in the Orthodox Church. That’s why I always look askance at people here on CAF or elsewhere who characterize me or Orthodox in general as “attacking” or “hating” the RCC. If it seems to some RCs that ex-Catholics are comforting themselves and licking their wounds by indulging in stereotypes and attacks of the RC, then you should also recognize that from the other side it looks the same: Catholics tell us ex-RCs that we are being hateful, attacking, unreasonable, uncharitable, etc. essentially just for existing and not agreeing with the RC, even if our experience outside of specific doctrinal/ecclesiological/theological disagreements is overwhelmingly positive. In recognition and gratitude of the positive effect that the RCC and many people in it have had in my life, I stay here on CAF (with frequent breaks, I’ll admit) despite the endless insistence from RCs that as an ex-RC I’ve been duped, I’m “ignorant” (adding “invincible” before this does not make it any less rude, by the way), I’m risking my salvation, I’m in a 'heretical" church/communion, etc.

It cuts both ways, I’m saying, so this thread is really not very becoming of current Catholics.

 

[RyanBlack]

so this thread is really not very becoming of current Catholics.

Something that is all too true of quite a few threads here that deal in any way whatsoever with religions other than Roman Catholicism.

 

[dzheremi]

Definitely. That’s why I don’t post much on this particular subforum. I naively clicked on this thread thinking that it might be an attempt by a well-meaning Catholic to understand why people leave the RCC, but as we can see, no such luck.

 

[RyanBlack]

Definitely. That’s why I don’t post much on this particular subforum. I naively clicked on this thread thinking that it might be an attempt by a well-meaning Catholic to understand why people leave the RCC, but as we can see, no such luck.

If I were to leave the Catholic Church and wanted to help ensure that someone considering the Catholic Church did not become Catholic, I would direct that person to here.

 

[Son_of_Niall]

Just speaking from my observations among fundamentalists:

Here’s a few reasons I’ve heard:

~Too many rules.
Try the fundamentalist church down the road. The CC will look absolutely liberal.

~I’m spiritual/don’t believe in organized religion.
Ask him to explain “disorganized religion”.

~Too much man-made stuff/doesn’t teach from the Bible.
Like altar calls, revival meetings, dress standards, Bible version standards, and on and on and on…

~It’s a Church of hate.
*Women.
*Gays.
*Won’t let non-Catholics take Communion.
And fundamentalists just loooooove gays, and “women in their place”.

~Because of the sex-abuse scandal they have no moral credibility.
Want a list of phediphile Baptist preachers? The list is long

~Who are they to tell me what I can/can’t do with my body?
Don’t smoke, don’t chew, don’t drink, watch TV…

~I want a divorce and the Church won’t let me.
Divorce is the unforgivable sin in fundamentalist churches.

~The Church is trapped in the past/needs to “get with the times”.
Because the concert arenas/mega-churches are sooo today.

~The Catholic Church always wants money.
At least the CC does not demand a person “tithe” thier income.

~The Church doesn’t want me to read from the Bible.
The average fundamentalist sermon reads one or two Bible verses and the rest of the half hour is filled with the “preacher’s” opinion on what the Bible says.

~The Church doesn’t want me to have a personal relationship with God/Christ.
In actual fact, the average fundamentalist congregation has a “personal relationship” with the preacher.
/QUOTE]

 

[batman1973]

Same could be said of ex-(anything)…

Many ex-Catholics attack the Catholic church
Many ex-Mormons attack the Mormon church
Many ex-JWs attack JW’s
Many ex-Opus Dei attack Opus Dei…

It’s not a unique phenomenon that any one group has the corner market on…

 

[BettyBoop416]

If I were to leave the Catholic Church and wanted to help ensure that someone considering the Catholic Church did not become Catholic, I would direct that person to here.

This made me laugh - in a sad kind of way.

If an acquaintance learns that I am Catholic and asks questions about the Church, I very rarely direct them to CAF. I made that mistake a couple of years ago and sure enough, the first time she logged on she stumbled across a thread about Catholic marriage that took off in a really nutty direction. A few days later she thanked me for the information, but she had decided that Catholicism “wouldn’t be a good fit” for her. Can’t say that I blame her.

 

[Eric_Hilbert]

Stay on the topic of the OP please

 

[Avila123]

The issue for me is not that someone feels that they have to leave the Church, that is between them and God. I am happy that they are making new discoveries about the Christian faith and will share the joy without trying to influence them or get into any debates or arguments.

My issues only arise when I do get aggressive (and usually ignorant) comments attacking and trying to undermine my faith. I have a friend who left the Catholic church and finally found a christian church which is okay with things that the vast majority of Christian churches object to i.e. sexually explicit books, the occult and a real hatred of Catholics. The problem for me is that she will insist on talking about these subjects in my home, knowing how this is contrary to the teachings of the Catholic Church and even after being asked not.

However, my Evangelical Protestant brother and I disagree on some major issues but we draw back, respecting the fact that we both love Jesus and that God has His plans for us.

I have respect for anyone who is following, or trying to follow Christ irrespective of the church they attend, but quickly lose respect if they try to steer me off course. I dare say it is the same for everyone else be they Evangelical, Protestant, Methodist etc etc.

 

[Agape_Thom]

Just thought I’d put my two cents worth in. I am a former (ex) Catholic, and I do not now, nor have I ever held any animosity toward the Catholic Church. I am a product of twelve years of Catholic Parochial school and a former alter boy (when you had to know Latin!) My reasons for leaving the Catholic Church were several and, I believe, well thought out. Catholics certainly disagree with my reasoning, as is their right.
I have always said that I owe a great deal to the Catholic Church. It was some of her priests and nuns who laid the foundation of my faith. Yes, there are a number of issues that the Catholic Church and I disagree about. But just because I think some one, or some institution is incorrect, is not any reason for me to hate it or them, or to loose respect for the same.
At the church that I belong to, there are many “ex-Catholics”. In fact, I think that if I were to do a survey of the membership, close to 50% would fit in that category. To the best of my knowledge, none of them hate the Catholic Church either.

 

[tobbias88]

Sorry, that priest was arrogant & foolish. If you find someone dying on the battlefield you would baptise them & not speculate on what they might or might not do. It was not for him to judge. Would Jesus have turned away this confused woman? I doubt it. Had the woman known her Faith a little better, she would have known she could have baptised the babe herself. In extremis anyone can perform baptism, I think?.

 

[George14]

Just thought I’d put my two cents worth in. I am a former (ex) Catholic, and I do not now, nor have I ever held any animosity toward the Catholic Church. I am a product of twelve years of Catholic Parochial school and a former alter boy (when you had to know Latin!) My reasons for leaving the Catholic Church were several and, I believe, well thought out. Catholics certainly disagree with my reasoning, as is their right.
I have always said that I owe a great deal to the Catholic Church. It was some of her priests and nuns who laid the foundation of my faith. Yes, there are a number of issues that the Catholic Church and I disagree about. But just because I think some one, or some institution is incorrect, is not any reason for me to hate it or them, or to loose respect for the same.
At the church that I belong to, there are many “ex-Catholics”. In fact, I think that if I were to do a survey of the membership, close to 50% would fit in that category. To the best of my knowledge, none of them hate the Catholic Church either.

Have you ever considered what Jesus Christ said to the Apostles? About whatever they ‘bind on earth?’

The church IS NOT A CREATOR OF what truths She passes on to us in its capacity as infallible teacher. She is only reprting EXISTING FACTS, truths, etc.

For a perspective on this point, it may help to see how ‘messengering’ works. THINGS ALREADY TRUE are what they pass on. So the Church’s role doesn’t depend on how smart or good men are, but upon their being honest in telling people what the Second Person of the Most Blessed Trinity guaranteed – namely that they’d be free of error when exercising that obligation.

It’s about God talking and doing, not about men voting…

 

[Memaw]

Sorry, that priest was arrogant & foolish. If you find someone dying on the battlefield you would baptise them & not speculate on what they might or might not do. It was not for him to judge. Would Jesus have turned away this confused woman? I doubt it. Had the woman known her Faith a little better, she would have known she could have baptised the babe herself. In extremis anyone can perform baptism, I think?.

No it isn’t, as a matter of fact a priest must be reasonably sure that the baby will be raised in the Church and that the parents take that responsibility seriously or he is not supposed to baptize it. They shouldn’t just baptize a baby nilly willy, no matter what. And it wasn’t the priest that walked away it was the mother. He was willing to work with her. Jesus allowed many people to walk away.If we know our faith, then we know a lay person can only baptize someone in case of emergency and NOT just because you want to. That ladies situation was not extreme.
Dying on a battle field or any where else for that matter is a much different thing. God Bless, Memaw

 

[George14]

For many “ex-catholics,” the misconceptions and ignorance of its teachings are ten times as great as their correct perceptions. They’re not leaving the church: they’re leaving a caricature of it, and that’s the only honest alternative avalable to them, usually.

The problem originates with the bisops WHO HAVE MISERABLY FAILED US FOR THE LAST 50 YEARS --in their mission to teach what they were commissioned to do. If you don’t believe me, please tell me how Georgetown U., Notre Dame, and C,U.are allowed to continue to use the pretext that they are Catholic schools. If you don’t get my drift, you are not informed what goes on there and who teaches there!!! And where the Abortionist in Chief gets honored seating at a KOC event without a whimper from ANY bisop. Au contraire, the Bishop in Chief of the US is the guest host.

THAT’S why there are ‘ex-catholics’ in such big numbers,
.
Making this point is likely to get me banned here, so if you don’t hear from me again, you’ll know why.

 

[Agape_Thom]

Have you ever considered what Jesus Christ said to the Apostles? About whatever they ‘bind on earth?’

The church IS NOT A CREATOR OF what truths She passes on to us in its capacity as infallible teacher. She is only reprting EXISTING FACTS, truths, etc.

For a perspective on this point, it may help to see how ‘messengering’ works. THINGS ALREADY TRUE are what they pass on. So the Church’s role doesn’t depend on how smart or good men are, but upon their being honest in telling people what the Second Person of the Most Blessed Trinity guaranteed – namely that they’d be free of error when exercising that obligation.

It’s about God talking and doing, not about men voting…

My intent in posting was not to begin a discussion of the merits of the Catholic Church or a listing of its faults. I was responding to the OP’s question regarding the hatred that some former Catholics may or may not have for the Catholic Church. I have no desire or need at this point in time to defend my faith decisions on an anonymous forum.

 

[Son_of_Niall]

For many “ex-catholics,” the misconceptions and ignorance of its teachings are ten times as great as their correct perceptions. They’re not leaving the church: they’re leaving a caricature of it, and that’s the only honest alternative avalable to them, usually.

The problem originates with the bisops WHO HAVE MISERABLY FAILED US FOR THE LAST 50 YEARS --in their mission to teach what they were commissioned to do. If you don’t believe me, please tell me how Georgetown U., Notre Dame, and C,U.are allowed to continue to use the pretext that they are Catholic schools. If you don’t get my drift, you are not informed what goes on there and who teaches there!!! And where the Abortionist in Chief gets honored seating at a KOC event without a whimper from ANY bisop. Au contraire, the Bishop in Chief of the US is the guest host.

THAT’S why there are ‘ex-catholics’ in such big numbers,
.
Making this point is likely to get me banned here, so if you don’t hear from me again, you’ll know why.

Unless you can separate bad human leadership with Christ’s mystical Church, you will always be disappointed. The Church is not made up of angels, but fallible human beings.
I used to have the same attitude when I left the Church years ago. It wasn’t until I learned the difference between the “Church of all ages” and the earthly institution that I finally understood what Christ meant. That being a Catholic is about ME, and not the holiness, or lack thereof, of it’s leadership.

 

[gh4]

I may have been a bit critical here, but I have not said bad things nor bashed the catholic church in conversation with others here where I live.
I still have neighbors and a few friends who attend the catholic church here. I have friends who are baptist, many friends who are Mennonite, some who are non-denom and many who are Mormon.
If someone wants to know why I left the catholic church I will explain it, and I take plenty of the “blame,” but I let them know that the catholic church failed me too. I don’t go in depth, and only share facts. I try really hard not to bad mouth the church or any other church for that matter.

My biggest reason for leaving is that I need more than 1 hour a week for my spiritual life and for fellowship. I am a widow who lives alone and bible study and such is something I need. The catholic church here offers 1 hour a week at mass and a couple of times a week of very very early masses attended by the priest and 2 other people. I asked for and tried to start different groups, but what I usually got was “we tried that and it didn’t work, we’re not going there again.” Alrighty then.

The church where I go, has services on Sunday, Sunday school for all ages, bible study, lady’s society, prayer group and so much more. I feel as though I am being fed, and it’s a wonderful feeling.

And just for the record, I live about 40 miles from the nearest catholic church (other than the one in town) and those are very small as well. It would be about a 200+ mile round trip to get to a larger catholic church and I just can’t afford that. So what I’m saying, going to a different parish is not an option.

 

[Adamski]

Why do ex-Catholics attack the Church?

Ex catholics that become fundamentalist
My personal experience is many are angry at their parents for failed marriages and broken homes and associate the Catholic Church with their broken childhood of divorce, alcoholism and criminal activity

Ex catholics that become secular liberals
They had an abortion, or knew someone that had one, cheated on their spouse, had children that live a disturbing life of drug use and open marriages, basically a life of sin and debouchery. And they are angry at the church for not approving of their sinful life

 

[laircy]

Just speaking from my observations among fundamentalists:
rfournier103;11339719:

Here’s a few reasons I’ve heard:

~Too many rules.
Try the fundamentalist church down the road. The CC will look absolutely liberal.

~I’m spiritual/don’t believe in organized religion.
Ask him to explain “disorganized religion”.

~Too much man-made stuff/doesn’t teach from the Bible.
Like altar calls, revival meetings, dress standards, Bible version standards, and on and on and on…

~It’s a Church of hate.
*Women.
*Gays.
*Won’t let non-Catholics take Communion.
And fundamentalists just loooooove gays, and “women in their place”.

~Because of the sex-abuse scandal they have no moral credibility.
Want a list of phediphile Baptist preachers? The list is long

~Who are they to tell me what I can/can’t do with my body?
Don’t smoke, don’t chew, don’t drink, watch TV…

~I want a divorce and the Church won’t let me.
Divorce is the unforgivable sin in fundamentalist churches.

~The Church is trapped in the past/needs to “get with the times”.
Because the concert arenas/mega-churches are sooo today.

~The Catholic Church always wants money.
At least the CC does not demand a person “tithe” thier income.

~The Church doesn’t want me to read from the Bible.
The average fundamentalist sermon reads one or two Bible verses and the rest of the half hour is filled with the “preacher’s” opinion on what the Bible says.

~The Church doesn’t want me to have a personal relationship with God/Christ.
In actual fact, the average fundamentalist congregation has a “personal relationship” with the preacher.

Those responses would work if the reasons came from fundamentalists. But from what I’ve seen, they’re usually from liberals who don’t want to conform.

 

[Remember_Me]

Just like Ex-Protestants who attack Protestantism.