So what is your story? What eventually led you out of the JWs? Also did you lose all faith in God or just in the JWs.
This is not a question that can be answered in a few quick lines, so I need to get another cup of coffee…I’m back…
Oh my, where to start…Ok, well let me just try and give you the “Cliff’s Notes” of my journey. My mother (a truely gentle spirit that I loved deeply…even if she had been mislead) found “the truth” the year I was born. My Dad did not fall for it. But my Mom became a very powerful force in my life, guilting me into the truth by basically telling me I was going to die at Armagedon (which was ALWAYS “just around the corner”) if I didn’t. So although I was allowed to lets say…go hunting with my Dad, I was told that it would be wrong for me to have a good time. I kid you not. And this was just one of the many mind games that were played on me.
So, I was “raised in the truth.” It was all I ever knew. Because all of my extended family were “in the world” we/I had very little if any contact with them as I was growing up. All I knew, and and my so called friends were at “the hall.” When I was 15 I was baptised as a JW…which basically meant I had swore an oath to be a loyal card carrying JW. Now if I did not toe the line, they could DF me. Which would have been a crushing blow. (As a matter of fact, I lost three of my freinds from my youth to suicide…and I think I know why.) So they had me. But I was never what you would call a team player. I had never made a conscious decission to join this group, but had just been raised as one. So, as I got older I started to walk the line, and in some cases live what the JW’s call a “double life.” I learned their game very well indeed. I knew what I could do and not do to avoid a DF…and as I got older knew what NOT to get caught doing. And keep in mind this was nothing bad by “worldly” standards. So life went on, and on…(BTW, I did not view this as being dishonest…I felt I had no choice to maintain my sanity.)
Then things started happening that opened my eyes to the evil of this group. I learned many new things on the Internet, and confirmed them elsewhere. One of the first real eye openers for me was the fact that the Governing Body (12 members of the Little Flock or 144,000…the ones going to heaven) in New York had admited they were not inspired…and that they did not always agree on what was right. A two thirds vote was needed to make policy. I found that a few of my friends had been DF’ed on things that at least HALF of the Body thought was OK!! Again, this is just one of many things that got me thinking. But I think the main thing was a lack of love being shown. Shepards are supposed to sheppard and love their flock, not crack the whip on them…and this is what I saw over and over. I could go on and on, but I guess it came down to the straw that broke the camels back. My youngest son (who probably was suffering the same fate as me, since his Mom is a true believer, and I’m not) did what even good teenage boys do…he did a little “touchy feelly” with his (at the time) soon to be wife. BTW, they could not have gone to far because we were home at the time and “thought” we were being good chaperones.) Anyway, he felt guilty and went and confessed to the Elders. And to make a long story short, they cracked the whip on him and DF’ed him! And to make it worse, he thinks he deserved it! Now he has been cut off from all his friends and family beside us.
That was it. That tore it. I had been going to a couple of meetings each month, just to keep the wife happy. But that was it. Something inside me said “enough.” I told my wife in a gentle but firm voice, that I was never going to set foot inside the Hall again. I told her among other things that I did not want to be there when the “Kool-Aid” came out. (A reference to Jim Jones that she did not care for.) I then went out to my office, opened my safe, and took out a gift that had been given to me years ago…a cross. I put it on. And yes…this is another DF offense. JW’s consider the symbol of Christianity to be a DF offense.
So…Dang, these were the Cliff’s notes?..At this point I feel that my mind has been brainwashed by these people. - I feel Jaded for lack of a better word. I have tried to read the KJV on my own, and although I can see the differences, I just don’t know what to believe. All my life being loyal to God meant being loyal to the “organization.” When I try to think of God, it is hard for me to not see JW Elders/Overseers cracking the whip. So do you see what I mean when I use the word “scarred?”
) here! The Catholic position, as I understand it is an individual posseses a God-given right to defend his and other’s lives against unprovoked attack, up to and including lethal means if that is what is necessary.