Ex-Mormons Why Did You Leave the Church II

[Bokonon9]

Mormon leaders who say that people leave Mormonism because they want to sin or were offended are lying. They are trying to put a wedge between the apostate and their Mormon families. They don’t want Mormons to see that apostates can be happy and successful outside the Mormon church. I can say that all the people I personally know who have left Mormonism did not leave to sin. They are all still faithful to their spouses, they still don’t abuse their children, they haven’t murdered anyone and they haven’t started robbing banks. We are still the same people. We just don’t believe in Mormonism, like the vast majority of people in this world. When I told my parents, they reacted as if I just told them I had murdered my children. The only thing that changed was I chose to sit in a different church pew on Sundays.

We believe in seeking and standing for the truth. It is extraordinarily difficult and painful to learn that the church you trusted lied to you. It was devastating, but when I decided to have courage and stand up for truth, a great burden lifted from my shoulders. I felt amazingly free. It was scary but liberating. It is offensive when Mormons say we left to sin. We do not desire to sin. We desire truth, often at great personal sacrifice.

When I delivered my letter to my bishop stating that I was leaving the LDS and my reasons for doing so, he told me that within ten years I would end up like all apostates - dead in a gutter. The bishop’s wife was a notorious gossip and within a few days the entire stake knew I was an apostate. Over the next few months at least a dozen people told me I would end up dead in the gutter (this is common Mormon folklore).

Well I’m here to report that 27 years later I am still gutter-free! I have a wonderful wife, 4 grown children who love me and visit at least once week, and seven beautiful grandchildren (and counting) who love their old “Papa”. I have a very successful executive career. But most important of all, I have a close and loving relationship with the Living Triune God within the framework of His one true Church - the Catholic Church.

Mormons need to stop lying about why so many people are leaving the Mormon cult. It simply cannot stand up to honest scrutiny. Those of us who had our hearts broken when we finally realized that we had been duped must forgive the perpetrators and pray that they find the peace and spiritual freedom we have found. Mormonism is bondage but the Truth will set them free.

 

[RebeccaJ]

For those people who have had a crisis of faith and come from Mormon families:

When you announce to your families that you don’t want to follow the Mormon way, the main concern they might have is that there is something you are either doing or contemplating that is not in harmony with their teachings or Christ’s teaching in general. Which would be a cause of great disappointment. That they (who are likely faithful people) failed to inspire a noble character in you.

As has been noted, the Mormon church is one of the few churches who will discipline their members. I’m not saying there aren’t sinners in their churches but they don’t have confessionals. Church discipline is for serious transgressions and repentance can be a long road back. And people who are in that sort of situation will avoid the church.

I knew a young Mormon girl who appeared to be a faithful member who all of a sudden dropped off the face of the earth. It turned out much later she was living with a married man which, in any Christian religion, is a serious transgression. So it’s likely that your families will worry that you’re doing something like that. Which would be cause to mourn and worry.

I noticed that in almost every divorce I ever heard of, he’s abusive and she’s a psycho. And I know on the Catholic forums, ex-Mormons always claim they became disenchanted through study. I don’t know for sure but I’m doubtful about these sort of claims.

Yes, going Mormon to Catholic is an amazing way to justify sinning all the freaking time! That is how we evangelize Mormons in fact. We teach them that God loves sin and wants you to sin more, because you aren’t sinning enough.

 

[andrewstx]

Mormons do not have rooms for confession, that is true. But they have confession to the bishop for sure.

And unlike Catholic confession which is simple and the penance usually easily done, the Mormon version of penance can literally take years. During that time the confesser is very close to excommunication for years at a time.

 

[rmcmullan]

I am going to apologize for that post, I shouldn’t have added that last paragraph because it was really a different thought. I didn’t mean to suggest that everyone who left the Mormon church did so because they were no longer worthy. But if that was the case, I don’t expect them to just come out and say that to a causal questioner. They would make a face-saving story. Like my wife was a psycho or my husband was abusive.

People leave every church for a variety of personal reasons. This thread is trying to support the theory that people lave the Mormon church because they don’t teach the same doctrine as the Catholic church. Sorry, I don’t buy that. Yeah, we believe different things and have a much different history. But that doesn’t change anything. Yeah, we decide which church to follow and for very personal reasons. But it the end, we all stand before the Saviour to be judged.

 

[Porknpie]

People leave every church for a variety of personal reasons.

Hopefully for theological reasons.

This thread is trying to support the theory that people lave the Mormon church because they don’t teach the same doctrine as the Catholic church. Sorry, I don’t buy that

The thread was started by me for Mormons to share their testimony on why they left LDS. You are inserting a presupposition that I did not make…that they joined the Catholic Church.

Yeah, we believe different things and have a much different history.

yes, one based on apostolic teachings and one based on Joseph Smith.

But that doesn’t change anything.

no, it changes everything. One is true and one is false. Our will innately desires the truth. The intellect though can be clouded…there never was an apostasy in the Church, let alone a great apostasy. Believing this is to be deceived.

Yeah, we decide which church to follow and for very personal reasons.

your mindset here is not orientated toward the Truth. We are to follow the Truth in the God’s revelation…and orientate ourselves, our lives to this truth which can be found in fullness in the Catholic Church, established by Christ.

But it the end, we all stand before the Saviour to be judged.

but Mormons would add that Joseph Smith will judge as well, along with the Father, a council of three? In following Christ’s Catholic Church, we can best secure our salvation through the seven sacraments, instituted by Christ for our salvation.

There are two types of people, those who seek the truth and those who do not. My sense is that Christ will ask if we did so…and did we follow that Truth…giving up all to follow him, just like the apostles did.

 

[iepuras]

People leave every church for a variety of personal reasons. This thread is trying to support the theory that people lave the Mormon church because they don’t teach the same doctrine as the Catholic church.

Where do you get that idea? As this is a Catholic forum, most of the ex Mormons you will find are (surprise!) Catholic or studying Catholicism. If you read my story, you will find that Catholicism had absolutely nothing to do with my leaving the church.

In my experience, the majority of ex Mormons who were born in the covenant become atheist. Only a handful of my ex Mormon friends have converted to Christianity. If a Mormon convert leaves Mormonism, they often return to their former faith.

I don’t know any ex Mormons, myself included, who left specifically to join another church. We left Mormonism because of Mormonism itself. I then proceeded on my faith journey and landed in RCIA.

 

[TexanKnight]

For those people who have had a crisis of faith and come from Mormon families:

When you announce to your families that you don’t want to follow the Mormon way, the main concern they might have is that there is something you are either doing or contemplating that is not in harmony with their teachings or Christ’s teaching in general. Which would be a cause of great disappointment. That they (who are likely faithful people) failed to inspire a noble character in you.

As has been noted, the Mormon church is one of the few churches who will discipline their members. I’m not saying there aren’t sinners in their churches but they don’t have confessionals. Church discipline is for serious transgressions and repentance can be a long road back. And people who are in that sort of situation will avoid the church.

I knew a young Mormon girl who appeared to be a faithful member who all of a sudden dropped off the face of the earth. It turned out much later she was living with a married man which, in any Christian religion, is a serious transgression. So it’s likely that your families will worry that you’re doing something like that. Which would be cause to mourn and worry.

I noticed that in almost every divorce I ever heard of, he’s abusive and she’s a psycho. And I know on the Catholic forums, ex-Mormons always claim they became disenchanted through study. I don’t know for sure but I’m doubtful about these sort of claims.

Your doubt does not change the facts. That is EXACTLY why I left. How anyone can stay LDS in the face of so much evidence that proves js was not a prophet is beyond understanding

 

[Boulder257]

Well I can’t speak for others, but in my personal journey, that was the case. I loved being LDS, loved the community, the beliefs in general (especially on things like the necessity of infant baptism and original sin, though that isn’t really unique to LDS), the concept of living apostles and prophets, and of course the temple (I wanted to volunteer as a temple ordinance worker, but then I was called as Elders Quorum President, and decided to focus on that). I was a firm believer, followed the WoW, Law of Chastity, tithed, went to all 3 hours of church, prayed, read my scriptures daily, etc.

When I starting studying the Bible, history, and looking at both sides, I came to realize, in my view, that the LDS claims, specifically on apostasy and restoration, were not tenable. Things like the Father progressing to Godhood (at least the fact that such a teaching is plausible within LDS theology), the priesthood restriction on blacks (and how prior prophets and apostles, a First Presidencies, etc understood it, as well as the teachings on the pre-mortal conduct of blacks), whether the current prophets, seers, and revelators functioned as the Biblical prophets, whether the LDS faith really “restored” things that were believed by the “primitive Church” (such as the temple Endowment), and Book of Mormon archaeology, were also things I looked at.

As I’m sure other posters here and elsewhere can attest, I really wanted to remain LDS and for it to be true. I posted many threads here, as well as at Mormon Dialogue and Discussion Board, to talk about issues related to apostasy and restoration, temple rites as a restoration, apostles leading the Church, etc, in an attempt to understand how Catholics and LDS view such things. I read article after article on FAIR and FARMS/MI (I’m quite interested to read the latest from the FAIR Conference going on now), in addition to the dozens of books I own in hardcopy and Kindle. But then I found that in many cases, the answers provided by FAIR and MI caused me to ask more questions than to provide a solid answer. After much study and fervent prayer, I came to realize that the Catholic Church really is the Lord’s Church. Although I don’t have any LDS family, it was still hard to leave, though I’m grateful that my close LDS friends understood, and while obviously they desire for me to return (as my Catholic family and others desired for me to return to the Catholic Church), they haven’t let it come between us.

I always enjoy reading your posts and getting your perspective. Thanks for being so open to sharing so much with us. I know I have learned from what you have shared.

 

[eddie_too]

been trying to keep up with this thread.

two comments. first, say anything you like about texas knight and his posts, but to me, his zeal for our Lord Jesus Christ and the Gospel impresses me greatly. he kind of reminds me of St. Paul the Apostle.

second, the God we catholics worship has no potential. He is fully actualized. He is the same, unchanging Being yesterday, today and forever. mormons, and many others, are not at the point that they can understand the significance of this aspect of the Divine Nature. but, it is the foundational truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

i was told mormons believe matter is infinite and eternal. so, mormons understand the necessity of a doctrine to explain existence. but, they do not understand the necessity that the source of existence be Pefect, which means fully actualized. a being that possesse potential, by definition, is not fully actualized and thus not Perfect. things that change are also not fully actualized.

it seems the confusion the mormon theology creates is with the idea that human beings can become perfected and fully actualized. we catholics believe that also. however, we catholics believe that men accomplish this full actualization (which, unlike God’s, is neither infinite nor eternal) by becoming perfectly united with God in heaven. that is how humans become like God, in the perfect union that is heaven.

so mormons understand the need for perfection in the human soul, but do not understand that perfection must exist before human beings can experience it. human beings do not create perfection as the mormons teach, but are given a share in the life of the Eternal Perfection through belief in the Eternal Perfection’s Life, Death and Resurrection.

there is without question much in the history, teachings and theology of the mormons that is irrational, unsupportable and false. there is need for this to be presented to mormons. i am not educated enough in mormonism to do this; but, the mormon converts to catholicism are well versed in the errors of mormonism and they do a great service to the RCC and to mormons by putting themselves on the line when encountering those who are still mormon.

for that, i thank them and assure them that they are in my daily prayers.

 

[Miriam1947]

For those people who have had a crisis of faith and come from Mormon families:

When you announce to your families that you don’t want to follow the Mormon way, the main concern they might have is that there is something you are either doing or contemplating that is not in harmony with their teachings or Christ’s teaching in general. Which would be a cause of great disappointment. That they (who are likely faithful people) failed to inspire a noble character in you.

**As has been noted, the Mormon church is one of the few churches who will discipline their members. ** I’m not saying there aren’t sinners in their churches but they don’t have confessionals. Church discipline is for serious transgressions and repentance can be a long road back. And people who are in that sort of situation will avoid the church.

I knew a young Mormon girl who appeared to be a faithful member who all of a sudden dropped off the face of the earth. It turned out much later she was living with a married man which, in any Christian religion, is a serious transgression. So it’s likely that your families will worry that you’re doing something like that. Which would be cause to mourn and worry.

I noticed that in almost every divorce I ever heard of, he’s abusive and she’s a psycho. And I know on the Catholic forums, ex-Mormons always claim they became disenchanted through study. I don’t know for sure but I’m doubtful about these sort of claims.

**As has been noted, the Mormon church is one of the few churches who will discipline their members. **

The 11th Article of Faith reads: “We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may.”

Do Mormons actually believe the 11th Article of Faith?

 

[rmcmullan]

I stil am doubtful when I hear something like “I left the Catholic/Mormon/Whatever church because I had questions Noooobody could answer!” Because we’re Christians and we know the power of faith. Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge. The Bible itself can be a very confusing book. The leaders in every church are men and less than perfect.

I do agree to some degree that a church’s doctrine and history play a part in the decision one makes as who to follow. The church will reflect the believer.

 

[LivingWaters7]

I stil am doubtful when I hear something like “I left the Catholic/Mormon/Whatever church because I had questions Noooobody could answer!” Because we’re Christians and we know the power of faith. Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge. The Bible itself can be a very confusing book. The leaders in every church are men and less than perfect.

I tend to agree with you in general. However, I think it’s important to use both faith and reason, both given by God. We all know that there are some things we simply don’t know, and will never know, until we are in the eternal presence of God. Many things we accept on faith. However, I’d venture to say that those that claim to have “studied their way out of Mormonism” aren’t talking about that sort of concept. I know I’m not.

And yes, the leaders in every church are men and less than perfect, as we all are. However, I also think that there is a category difference between the leaders of the LDS Church and the leaders of other churches (generally speaking), in that the LDS leaders are sustained as and believed to be Prophets, Seers, and Revelators. So, this isn’t just any old church that’s led by men that read the Bible and decided to open up a church, but, objectively speaking, this is a church that claims to be led by 15 prophets, seers, and revelators. If that’s true, there should be some differences between the LDS Church led by prophets, and other Churches led by non-prophets, at least IMO.

 

[LivingWaters7]

People leave every church for a variety of personal reasons. This thread is trying to support the theory that people lave the Mormon church because they don’t teach the same doctrine as the Catholic church. Sorry, I don’t buy that.

I don’t either, because:

1. That’s not what this thread is about. It’s merely about ex-LDS sharing their stories. If you browse through the thread, you’ll notice a number of non-Catholic ex-LDS sharing their stories as well.
2. Again, only speaking for myself, I certainly didn’t leave the LDS Church because it doesn’t teach the same doctrine as the Catholic Church. That doesn’t make any sense. It’s illogical. Indeed, when I began questioning and heavily researching, I looked into the Orthodox Church, Evangelical Christianity, even Islam! My assessment on the LDS faith had nothing at all to do with the doctrines of the Catholic Church. My focus was on reading LDS apologetics in support of a total apostasy and a restoration of the “primitive/ancient/divine Church”. Books on that topic that I read include The Great Apostasy, The Inevitable Apostasy and the Promised Restoration, Restoring the Ancient Church, The World and the Prophets, Mormonism and Early Christianity, Apostasy From the Divine Church, among others, as well as multiple FAIR and FARMS/MI articles, for months.

What I came to realize was that, in addition to the Biblical verses that were being cited in support of a total apostasy not actually supporting a total apostasy, the apologetics in support of apostasy and restoration many times supported the Catholic/Orthodox claims, and not the LDS claims. Reading Margaret Barker’s works on the temple made me realize that she wasn’t talking about Mormonism, but Catholicism and Orthodoxy (talking to an Orthodox poster at MDDB showed it wasn’t just me )! Her writings helped me to really consider Catholicism, and Orthodoxy, as valid continuations of ancient Judaism. There was a clear connection between the beliefs and rites of Catholicism and the Old Testament temple (exemplified in the priests of Melchizedek offering a sacrifice of bread and wine, the importance of a sacrificial priesthood, the Bread of the Presence in the temple, etc).

Further, what caused me more pause was realizing that although LDS apologists and scholars, like Nibley and Bickmore, might refer to a “primitive Church” or an “ancient Church”, and then would spend the rest of their book(s) pointing out beliefs of that “primitive/ancient Church” that are in harmony with uniquely LDS beliefs, I saw that there really wasn’t an entity, a cohesive Church of Jesus Christ of Former-day Saints, with all of these unique beliefs that they claim are restored. Bickmore titled his book “Restoring the Ancient Church”, yet, I don’t really see what entity in history can be that “Ancient Church” he’s talking about. Instead, they pull quotes from all over, attempting to prove the restoration. I also found that in going back to the quotes in context, they many times didn’t say what they wanted it to, nor did they support the LDS position when understood in the theological and philosophical contexts that the quotes came from. For example, many LDS quote Clement of Alexandria or Cyril of Jerusalem on the “mysteries” and anointing rituals. The problem is that, the “mysteries” aren’t temple rituals, but the Catholic/Orthodox sacraments, which are frequently, even today, referred to as the mysteries. The anointing ritual is not an ancient Initiatory, as Nibley seemed to believe, but the Catholic/Orthodox Confirmation/Chrismation sacrament, which is still done in that way in the Eastern Catholic and Eastern Orthodox churches.

So to end my rambling, I personally didn’t leave Mormonism because it didn’t teach Catholic doctrines. Catholicism wasn’t on my radar. I left because I couldn’t find Biblical support for the Great Apostasy, because history didn’t point to an actual restoration in the way that LDS apologists and scholars seemed to want it to, and I came to realize, independent of all that, that Catholicism (as well as the belief in the continuity of the Church and Kingdom established by Christ) had much more Biblical and historical support, and after much prayer, I believe that God led me back to the Catholic Church, even though I had strong desires to remain LDS, for multiple reasons. And this doesn’t touch on other issues I had in the context of a Divine Church, such as the priesthood restriction and how the First Presidency had taught that it was a “direct commandment of the Lord” (and now, we just don’t know where it came from). You can also see my blog for me thoughts on various issues related to all of that.

 

[LivingWaters7]

I always enjoy reading your posts and getting your perspective. Thanks for being so open to sharing so much with us. I know I have learned from what you have shared.

Thank you!

 

[pablope]

I stil am doubtful when I hear something like “I left the Catholic/Mormon/Whatever church because I had questions Noooobody could answer!” Because we’re Christians and we know the power of faith. Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge.

The Bible itself can be a very confusing book. The leaders in every church are men and less than perfect.

r.

Yes…for those who try to interpret it outside of the faith that compiled it…and try to use it for what it was not intended to be.

For Catholics and Orthodox…it is not a confusing book.

 

[twopekinguys]

Where do you get that idea? As this is a Catholic forum, most of the ex Mormons you will find are (surprise!) Catholic or studying Catholicism. If you read my story, you will find that Catholicism had absolutely nothing to do with my leaving the church.

In my experience, the majority of ex Mormons who were born in the covenant become atheist. Only a handful of my ex Mormon friends have converted to Christianity. If a Mormon convert leaves Mormonism, they often return to their former faith.

I don’t know any ex Mormons, myself included, who left specifically to join another church. We left Mormonism because of Mormonism itself. I then proceeded on my faith journey and landed in RCIA.

Very well said.

 

[twopekinguys]

I stil am doubtful when I hear something like “I left the Catholic/Mormon/Whatever church because I had questions Noooobody could answer!” Because we’re Christians and we know the power of faith. **Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge. ** The Bible itself can be a very confusing book. The leaders in every church are men and less than perfect.

I do agree to some degree that a church’s doctrine and history play a part in the decision one makes as who to follow. The church will reflect the believer.

But, faith is not the absence of reason either. Quite the opposite, reason is very much a part of faith.

 

[RebeccaJ]

I stil am doubtful when I hear something like “I left the Catholic/Mormon/Whatever church because I had questions Noooobody could answer!” Because we’re Christians and we know the power of faith. Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge. The Bible itself can be a very confusing book. The leaders in every church are men and less than perfect.

I do agree to some degree that a church’s doctrine and history play a part in the decision one makes as who to follow. The church will reflect the believer.

Faith in what, exactly? That Joseph Smith didn’t marry other men’s wives? That he didn’t marry mothers and daughters? That he didn’t illegally start a bank, with a treasure chest of rocks? That the Book of Abraham isn’t a complete farse? That the whole Mormon belief system isn’t made up?

It isn’t hard to answer these questions when you stop and think for a moment that Smith was not divinely guided, but a con artist. This is a devastating conclusion for a true believing Mormon, like yourself. When the Mormon Church itself cannot address its own history, and only can respond with “just believe”, then you aren’t experiencing faith, you are experiencing the con.

As has already been stated, most former LDS go atheist, as the LDS experience creates a mistrust of religions and religious claims. Faith becomes the word that is used to further a con. 36% of people in Salt Lake City responded to a poll that they are not religiously afiliated, the national rate is about 10%.

Mormonism is an abuse of the soul, the fruits of this are abuse are plain, for you to see. But you are blind, and call the full and total rejection of the farce, “lack of faith”.

Keep telling yourself that your faith is stronger than all of those who have seen through the con, and left. It adds to the devastation and anger when you come to realize, you’ve been had, through and through, top to bottom, end to end. Your faith is misplaced.

 

[RebeccaJ]

Thanks for the website on Westridge. Eye opening.

Very sad, and shows the corruption that exists in the religious and political landscape of Utah.

 

[rmcmullan]

LivingWaters7

Reason definitely plays a part although what is reasonable will vary greatly.

The Pope and the Prophet are still just men trying to do a job. Take a look at the Biblical apostles and prophets and you’ll see that they often made a mess of things. Even Peter. I’m glad you have high expectations of them but they’re still just men, not angels.