Favour to ask (mainly wanting to hear from men)

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For what it’s worth-

I’ve always, always done that sort of thing-open doors, pull out chairs, watch my language in front of women, etc.

If someone said, “Your not being a gentlemen” to another man- I really can’t think of a worse insult.

If someone said it to me (which, thank God, has never happend) I’d be mortified.

30 years old, single, never been married here.
 
CountrySinger said:
When I got home, he was waiting there,and gave me a big hug. And then he pulled out this beautiful gun. 😃 We went shooting my backyard (20 acres), and it was exactly what I needed. To this day I still have it, and I use it whenever I have a bad day.
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I’ll be dipped. Happiness really IS a warm gun! 😃
 
CMSCMS, traditional courtesies may have that effect, but I suppose it’s part of their function, although in a low-key way (promoting decorum and reverence, in light-hearted contexts: pampering). If you don’t think very high of your reaction to them, just think that even your “thank you” reassures them they still have a place being what they are. Plus, one day you can return the favour if you see the guy carrying a heavy piece of equipment or a huge shopping bag… or you can otherwise return the favour by being kind to them when a situation arises (which is definitely not unladylike). Plus, if you leave them the time to open the door before you, if you know they would want to, shows that you respect them as gentlemen and you leave them the opportunity to be what they are (same with picking your book or pen or whatever else drops). However, some men might take a ready acceptance of such squiring to be a manifestation of romantic openness. Probably especially true with the more advanced gesture, such as pulling the chair or helping with the coat (in business situations, he’s probably being a gentleman, in certain social situations among young people… depends; you can always say that you appreciate the willingness, but it would make you feel uncomfortable).

(Note: passing through without saying “thank you” is not necessarily rude and may have imply that “nothing less is expected”.)
 
Hi Chevalier,

With all due respect, I am not sure what your point is. Are you saying men feel good when women say thank you?

CM
 
cmscms said:
Hi Chevalier,

With all due respect, I am not sure what your point is. Are you saying men feel good when women say thank you?

CM
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I’m afraid I was basically thinking aloud and considering two opposing positions at the same time. To no conclusion, it seems. Sigh, happens sometimes.
 
dakotagirl said:
Oooh, pick me! I will tell you about the man I have held other men up to for years! (When I was 8 I promised myself I would hunt me and catch me a man like this.) My grandpa, who got married in his early twenties to his child bride, not only never cheated, but probably never looked at another woman. He was a faithful Catholic all of his life. He prays the daily Rosary. He had MANY children (no, not 4), whom he supported by working his rear off up to seven days a week, looong days at backbreaking work. The fact of the matter is, he was so used to working, that he was never still, and when he became ill and had to rest, he went stir-crazy. Naturally, raising oodles of children didn’t exactly leave him with a retirement plan, and so when he became ill later in life, way past retirement age, he continued to work so that his bride of more than 50 years would be looked after. He is a shining example to his children and to every one of his ridiculously large numbers of grandchildren. Obviously he is generous, but he is also modest, in both senses of the word - you will never catch him casting attention on himself, and he will go out of his way to avoid saying something that could be construed as smutty. :p:D Basically, I could go on all day, but if you don’t get the point by now, you will just have to take my word for it that he is darling. 😃
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Good luck finding a man that keep his eyeballs in his head!
 
My dad is a true model of a husband and father in many ways. When I was born, he left his well paid job which involved long hours and lots of travel, to move to the country, nearer where my grandparents lived, to run the village store. I grew up in the house above the shop, and he was always around. My mum also quit work to look after me (I was the first and only child). After my mum died, my dad managed to balance running his business with looking after me, though my grandma also stepped up and played a huge role in my childhood. He’s told me before that he will never marry again, because he could never replace what he had with my mum. He’s so proud of what I’m doing, even though I know he doesn’t really understand the work a graduate student does, and even though I’m not earning much money. I know I can go to him with anything, and though he gives good advice, he lets me make my own mistakes (lots of them). Though he’s not a Catholic, he has tried his best to understand why my faith is important to me, came to my Confirmation, drives me to Mass when I go home to visit, and that tolerance is rare in Scotland where a lot of protestant families are still very prejudiced (I have heard some real horror stories from fellow converts). I’d be happy to be able to live up to his standard.
 
Here’s an excerpt from a blog post you might enjoy…

Though monarchies are rare these days, my wife is actually the daughter of a very wealthy King. One of the great benefits of this relationship is that he has expressed in no uncertain terms that he loves me and my family and that we will always be welcome in his care. The challenge is that he is also a very powerful King. Though he is benevolent and kind, I do live with an extra sense of caution regarding how I treat my wife. I know that her father is always aware of how his daughter is feeling about our relationship.

The rest is here…
 
reading this stuff has brought tears to my eyes and has all the more ENCOURAGED me to keep praying for my future hubby and marriage life!!

Thank you Jesus for these wonderful self-sacrificing spouses.
 
Okay, I know you want to mainly hear from men, but I hope this story gives you inspiration.

My parents have been married 36/37 years and they are in their latter 50’s. They had six of us. My dad is such a role model to me, as well as my mother. In their marriage, my mom was bedridden for 3 years from depression (she did NOT have a childhood like children should have). During this time, the docs told my dad she would never get better and be like this the rest of her life. By this time they had 3 kids and were around 30 yrs. old. Many family friends prayed during this period.

She was healed. My dad valiantly stuck by her.

My mom is like Mother Teresa to every person she meets. My dad is a warrior and is a hard working man who loves all of us. They have had their trials, but to this day my dad tells my mom how beautiful she is…etc (dotes on her). They have never cheated on one another. My dad does not “check out women”. He tries to resist impure thoughts, if it pops in his mind, when a woman wears provocative clothes. My parents still inspire me to grow closer to God and the Church. They keep God at the center of their lives.

I know they are not perfect. What I am saying to you is that there are men out there like my father who strive to be godly men, godly husbands, and godly fathers.

They are an inspiration to me. If you want to be married someday, pray for your future spouse 🙂 and have faith and hope…

If this helped at all, then I am glad!
 
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