Feeling alone in my liberal university

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MontChevalier

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I started going to my new university last month and it has not been an easy endeavor. It’s a government-controlled institution with so much liberalism that it makes me sick to my stomach.

The only reason I’m even in this place is cause they’re offering me what I want for my bachelors. And that’s only like five years away to finish.

I have made no friends, and I’ve only felt more miserable everyday I spent there. I have literally found no one who thinks like me, and that’s what I really need in my life right now. Diversity can go to hell, for all I care. My psychologist says that being alone isn’t healthy. But it’s not like I have a choice.

It’s all about promoting homosexuality and homosexuals and socialism here and communism there, and the only religions with clubs in the University are Protestant ones there. It’s like I’ve literally entered into the domain of hell and I have a sword on one hand and a shield on the other, with zero back-up.

I was told by the Student Faculty that I have the option to make my own Catholic Club, but I don’t know…seems like alot of work, but I don’t want to do anything without some advice to back it all up. I have the paperwork here with me, but I don’t know if I should go ahead with it.

I joined this writer’s club, but it has been hell. I have seen so many mistakes on the leadership that I am very nearly about to leave the club if I don’t see some improvement. Most of the members are women, so I already feel horrible, cause they flaunt their femenism around like its okay. It’s humiliating. And some of the guys who’ve joined the club are not guys I would befriend, ever. They look like…hooligans. I’m not sure if that defines them correctly, but they have tattoos, and look like troublemakers and punks and whatnot and do questionable things.

I could use some help on this matter of my anti-catholic university.

Thank you
-MontChevalier
 
Not to be rude, but you are coming off as extremely judgmental. It sounds like you are determining the value of individuals completely on the basis of such superficial things as appearance. No one says you have to best friends with everyone, but perhaps do away with the sense of superiority and you’ll find it easier to relate to others.

Furthermore, despite the fact that there doesn’t appear to be a solid Catholic presence on campus, I don’t think it would be a bad idea to reach out to the Protestants. While it would be preferable to have close confidants who are Catholic, I wouldn’t turn down the opportunity to befriend good Christians with similar values, regardless of denomination.
 
  1. You are never alone. Use this time to get closer to your Saviour. I have a feeling that later on in life you’ll remember the time you had alone and wish for it again! Christ is calling out to you, answer that call. The angels and saints are your friends.
  2. I am in the same situation, in a liberal university, in a liberal parish in a small town. You know what is great about that? I get to meet and talk to all kinds of people. Sure, some people aren’t my cup of tea, but that’s fine. I know some fantastic atheists who I speak to about my faith. I know some great protestants who I speak to about my faith. You know, as a Catholic you are allowed friends outside the faith. I understand that it can be hard to find people, but you will eventually. Just be friendly to all, and be happy to chat. Sometimes your own mindset can be your own worst enemy.
  3. Go ahead and set up that Catholic club. Do the best you can. You can bet that others will join! I can promise that. Do it! Ask God to guide you, He will help you.
  4. Be joyful my friend. You are Catholic. You are getting an education. You aren’t starving, and happiest of all - Jesus Christ loves you! The joy of the Christian faith is deep, let the love of God consume you and I guarantee no amount of loneliness will ever make you unhappy.
 
I would look for off-campus Catholic activities and groups if I were you. Surely there is a Catholic social club or a church-based social group you could join?

And yes, someone has to make the first move of setting up anything on campus which is religiously based. Pray and you will be guided.
 
I have to agree with Fidei, if you’re behaving at all like you’re coming off in this posting its probably incredibly off putting to people.

First off I have to say that college is about new experiences and meeting people who may be totally unlike you. That’s the point of it all, getting an education and learning to deal with folks who are coming at life from a completely different direction than you are.

I had a Mod. Euro. History class this past semester with a professor who was so conservative I found the course to be almost insufferable. But even though it was an elective there was no way I was going to drop it. Dropping it would have been allowing him to dictate my experience. You have to deal with opinions that are different to yours. Examine your own beliefs, see if they still hold water, see if the other person has any knowledge to add to your own, if they do, great, if they don’t hold to what you believe and move on.

Second, we all have to just suck it up sometimes. I respectfully disputed this teacher on every bogus talking point, every truncated quote, every right wing handout he threw at us and he didn’t like me very much by the end and I’m sure he thought I was another commie-pinko-‘libtard’. But he had to give me an ‘A’ because I earned it and I left that class having read two amazing books (Darkness At Noon and The Plague) that I probably would have never picked up and adding a 3rd one (The Nazi War On Cancer) to my Amazon cart. Long story short you can learn something from anyone, even people you vehemently disagree with.

Finally your circle of friends and acquaintances shouldn’t just be people who fall in lock step with everything you believe. Two of my best friends are staunch conservative Republicans. Sure we talk about politics and we rarely agree but we also talk about a thousand other things. The world is an awfully big place and you’re doing yourself a great disservice to avoid and be hyper critical of those who disagree with you. Give it a shot, get out there, talk to people. Limiting yourself to folks who think like you isn’t a life preserver, its a straight jacket.
 
Just start the Catholic Club and see what happens. In addition, if you have a local parish near the university attend that and see if you find any young people there. You might actually be able to find people who go to your college go to your church as well.
 
FideiDefensor said:
Not to be rude, but you are coming off as extremely judgmental. It sounds like you are determining the value of individuals completely on the basis of such superficial things as appearance. No one says you have to best friends with everyone, but perhaps do away with the sense of superiority and you’ll find it easier to relate to others.

Furthermore, despite the fact that there doesn’t appear to be a solid Catholic presence on campus, I don’t think it would be a bad idea to reach out to the Protestants. While it would be preferable to have close confidants who are Catholic, I wouldn’t turn down the opportunity to befriend good Christians with similar values, regardless of denomination.
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Completely agree Fidei

“Love thy neighbour” is the most difficult commandment for us to fulfill.It is easy to love those around us who are nice to us and agree with everything.We are called to love everyone …

Matthew 5:44
“But I say to you, Love your enemies: do good to them that hate you: and pray for them that persecute and calumniate you” .

As Christian Catholics we are called to love everyone with love and tolerance.When people hurt us we are to forgive them.We are not elite or superior to others.These liberal people are your brothers and sisters,we are all God’s children.By example of love and faith,kindness and friendliness you will be preaching the Gospel as St Francis said “Preach the Gospel at all times and if necessary use words”.Let us be the example of love in life…

These ‘liberal’ people may not do things you think is right but I am sure they have good hearts and do many good things and it is not our place to judge.We should remember as Catholics it is our duty to stand up for the less fortunate in society the poor the homeless give drink to the thirsty food to the hungry visit the imprisoned etc form the corporal works of mercy. If Jesus were here on earth He would be associating with everyone.He always associated with people in society who were not popular. Jesus was friends with all sinners…we are all sinners.Jesus associated with everyone including tax collectors and prostitutes Matthew 21:31 " Which of the two did what his father wanted?" “The first,” they answered. Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you.

Romans 12:16 “Be in harmony with one another. Do not have a high opinion of yourselves, but be in agreement with common people. Do not give yourselves an air of wisdom.”

By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another (John 13:35).

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates his brother is still in the darkness. Whoever loves his brother lives in the light, and there is nothing in him to make him stumble (1 John 2:9-10).
The uniqueness of Christianity stands out boldly in the way we treat our enemies.

Our highest calling is to spread the Gospel and help others grow in Christ.
 
Being around like-minded persons can be refreshing and comfortable. I think it brings a boost to one’s mental health by decreasing stress and increasing feeling of belonging. So I can understand the OP’s desire to connect with like-minded persons.

I am not sure where he lives, so it is hard to give advice. However, I think a common practice in the US is for a diocese to assign a local parish to meet student needs, when a separate Catholic student center does not exist on campus. I wonder what the local parish is like and what kind of resources it offers to the university students?

I agree with the OP that starting a student organization is a daunting experience, especially if you are already feeling isolated. It would be good to establish some friends who are willing to co-found the organization. Can they be found at the local parish? Are there other colleges or universities in the area with a Catholic student group or Catholic student center where knowledgeable people might be able to give advice?
 
I do think you are being a little too judgmental (talking about “hooligans” with tattoos), but other than that I know how you feel. I felt the same way at a university I attended, and I couldn’t wait to get out. I made some friends, but never felt like I belonged there and haven’t missed it at all. I don’t say this to be discouraging, but only because some other people have suggested that you just need to lighten up and stop being “superior”, which may be true to an extent. Overall, though, it sounds like you might do better at a smaller Catholic college. There is nothing wrong with that. If you are only there because the university offers a certain major, maybe you could consider going to another school that might be farther away but with the environment you need to thrive.

However, you’ve only been there a month. I hated my first semester as an undergraduate, and I was in a small liberal arts Catholic college, which was the perfect place for me. My roommate was awful, I wanted to leave and never come back because I felt like I wasn’t making friends and I missed my family. Luckily for me, my parents said that I was not allowed to come home unless at the end of the first year, I really did hate it. I stuck it out and what I realized (after a roommate change) was that it takes me longer than many people to adjust to new situations. It makes things difficult when you’re trying to live your life and try new things, and I suspect maybe you are the same way. After a awhile, I never wanted to leave! Maybe giving it a little time will help. You’ll have more opportunities to meet like-minded people (I assure you, they are there…just might be a little hard to come across!), and more time to make some friends overall. They may not be Catholic, and they may not look the way you think they should, but neither are many of the people you’re going to encounter out in the working world.

Do you have a job on campus? If not, it might help you meet people in a more neutral environment, outside of class or a specific club.
 
I’m assuming you are 18 and have just started your freshman year. I, and many conservatives like me, find it very difficult to be around liberals. Although I understand this institution offers the degree in the subject you want, you cannot go on for five years without a social life. I think you should reconsider your major and transfer to a more conservative school. People do it all the time and very few actually find jobs in the area they studied in college. College is an experience. It should be a balance between what you are learning in the classroom and what you are learning in the dorm with friends. And those friends remain with you the rest of your life. You don’t want to miss out on that.
 
aicirt said:
I’m assuming you are 18 and have just started your freshman year. I, and many conservatives like me, find it very difficult to be around liberals. Although I understand this institution offers the degree in the subject you want, you cannot go on for five years without a social life. I think you should reconsider your major and transfer to a more conservative school. People do it all the time and very few actually find jobs in the area they studied in college. College is an experience. It should be a balance between what you are learning in the classroom and what you are learning in the dorm with friends. And those friends remain with you the rest of your life. You don’t want to miss out on that.
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I would try and leave for another university as soon as possible, but my family doesn’t have the money to send me off to foreign lands to study. I’ve been going to college now for 4 years, transferring from one university to the next to end up on this one, only cause it’s the only one with what’s offering what I want.

My college experience so far has been horrible. I think it’s all badly designed and made so that students fail on purpose. I’m not living in the dorms, by the way. My house is nearby; about a city away. I drive there in my car.

Even if I were to reconsider a major, I don’t know what else I would be good at, or would have fun with. The country only offers very little, and the little it does offer sucks. My only interest is in finishing my bachelors and leaving the country as soon as possible, before Obama wrecks what’s left.

I’ll talk to the student faculty tomorrow about setting up my Catholic Club.

-MontChevalier
 
If your Catholic group ends up not working out, I think you should just go ahead and join the other Christian group available. You won’t have to go to their church or anything, but it would be nice being a group of Christian people to hang out with.
 
One thing, OP--------

Just because one has many tattoos does not mean they are “hooligans.” Lots of people I know who are devout Christians/Catholics also happen to have lots of tattoos. Be careful in judging by appearance and being uncharitable, there.

As for the rest------------------I definitely would start that Catholic Club. It will enable you and others to reach out and witness you faith to the liberals in your college and hopefully (maybe) convert them or at least get them interested in the subject.
 
OrdinaryMelkite said:
One thing, OP--------

Just because one has many tattoos does not mean they are “hooligans.” Lots of people I know who are devout Christians/Catholics also happen to have lots of tattoos. Be careful in judging by appearance and being uncharitable, there.

As for the rest------------------I definitely would start that Catholic Club. It will enable you and others to reach out and witness you faith to the liberals in your college and hopefully (maybe) convert them or at least get them interested in the subject.
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What I had meant originally had been misunderstood and taken out of context. I was trying to describe them in the things that they did, not judge them, so that people here could understand what kind of guys I was meeting. Should I had been more crass and said that they were doing drugs? Or that the fact that their rude behavior is off-putting?

The limit is: PG, for these movies, and I wanted to keep it that way.
 
I too attend a university where pride and liberalism are prevalent. Feminist strumpets strut around with abortion pamphlets and goons festoon themselves with radical Communist ideologies.

Go get yourself a chaplet of Saint Michael and spend some time in the library or cafeteria praying.
 
I think most people (catholics) go to “liberal” universities and work in liberal companies and live in liberal socities. 😉

I like the fact that you mentioned that forming a Catholic group seems like a lot of work. It is a lot of work man. Most singles here often complain about there not being single groups in their Churches bla bla bla. It’s difficult to form and keep such groups alive but there is always a starting point.

I recommend reading the book: The Introduction to the Devout Life by St. Francis De Sales. The book is geared at the laity living in the secular world–how to live a devout life in the midst of secular people…
 
ExLibris said:
I too attend a university where pride and liberalism are prevalent. Feminist strumpets strut around with abortion pamphlets and goons festoon themselves with radical Communist ideologies.

Go get yourself a chaplet of Saint Michael and spend some time in the library or cafeteria praying.
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“Feminist strumpets”??? Is that how a Christian should speak of others?
 
severus68 said:
“Feminist strumpets”??? Is that how a Christian should speak of others?
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Personally, I don’t have a problem with the words the Poster picked to describe the person. I’m sure she would not yell that to her on the campus. But the woman she’s describing is one we all know exists. She willing to get herself out there promoting abortion, birth control, sex without responsibility, fornication, men are pigs philosophy and, through her rants, carry away others into sin. So she’s no angel.
My peeve is when reporters describe rapists, muggers etc. as “gentlemen”. Really?
 
I stayed away from Christianity for so long partly after so many people I wanted to be friends with did not want to be friends with me. I was rough around the edges, had facial piercings, dyed hair, tattoos, etc. I didn’t feel accepted.

It’s lovely to find good Christian friends who are willing to go to lunch/study with me, despite my exterior. It’s almost like… well, an embodiment of Christ. It’s certainly rubbed off on me.

😉
 
MontChevalier said:
I started going to my new university last month and it has not been an easy endeavor. It’s a government-controlled institution with so much liberalism that it makes me sick to my stomach.

The only reason I’m even in this place is cause they’re offering me what I want for my bachelors. And that’s only like five years away to finish.

I have made no friends, and I’ve only felt more miserable everyday I spent there. I have literally found no one who thinks like me, and that’s what I really need in my life right now. Diversity can go to hell, for all I care. My psychologist says that being alone isn’t healthy. But it’s not like I have a choice.

It’s all about promoting homosexuality and homosexuals and socialism here and communism there, and the only religions with clubs in the University are Protestant ones there. It’s like I’ve literally entered into the domain of hell and I have a sword on one hand and a shield on the other, with zero back-up.

I was told by the Student Faculty that I have the option to make my own Catholic Club, but I don’t know…seems like alot of work, but I don’t want to do anything without some advice to back it all up. I have the paperwork here with me, but I don’t know if I should go ahead with it.

I joined this writer’s club, but it has been hell. I have seen so many mistakes on the leadership that I am very nearly about to leave the club if I don’t see some improvement. Most of the members are women, so I already feel horrible, cause they flaunt their femenism around like its okay. It’s humiliating. And some of the guys who’ve joined the club are not guys I would befriend, ever. They look like…hooligans. I’m not sure if that defines them correctly, but they have tattoos, and look like troublemakers and punks and whatnot and do questionable things.

I could use some help on this matter of my anti-catholic university.

Thank you
-MontChevalier
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Careful you might find a lot of faithfult Catholics that are “socialists”!!! What would you do then? What if they told you our Pope was farther left fiscally than any politician in the United States except for Dennis Kuchnich? While true I say that to make a point…

It seems to me you have already judged everyone at this university. Perhaps there are a lot of people that aren’t what they seem on the outside and/or perhaps you need to spend some time learning that your theories and understanding aren’t exactly what you thought they were…

Jesus hung out with all kinds of people to set the example… that’s always a good way to start.
 
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