Feeling embarrassed after confession

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I struggled with the same thing for a while and confessed it like any other sin.
I thought it was embarrassing as I confessed it, but had no issue with seeing Father later on whatsoever. I worked as a catechist and he knew very well that it was me.

However, I do believe in that thing called what´s said in the confessional stays in the confessional. And it does. So when I speak with him, I literally pretend like the whole thing never happened, and he does so as well.
 
You make a good point there! Also, I believe God makes them forget these things as there´s no need for them to remember it as they´ve acted in the person of Christ.
 
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Also it´s great that Confession is embarrassing from time to time, because it helps us grow in virtue considering our humility.
 
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And you did the right thing by being honest and confessing this sin instead of withholding it. 👍
 
Does your family ever invite a priest over for dinner? Getting to know priests as people can help ease some of the fears.
 
Shy_christian said:
I’m a female and I know it’s rare but I committed acts of impurity.
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It’s not rare. Females “commit acts of impurity” all the time. I am female and have committed them myself and so has just about every other female my age I ever knew.

First of all, if you’re embarrassed then use that as a motivation to keep you from sinning again. I find such sins embarrassing too. So when I start thinking about sinning, I remind myself that I will end up having to think about having done this embarrassing sin and that I will have to tell it in confession, and that generally makes the sin look extremely unattractive.

Second, if you’re embarrassed to tell these sins to a priest who knows you, see if you can go confess to a priest who does not know you, just to get rid of these sins. On the 2 or 3 occasions when I’ve had something really embarrassing to confess, I went to a cathedral and confessed to an anonymous priest who I didn’t know and he didn’t know me and I wasn’t going to be seeing him again any time soon because the cathedrals are not close by, are kind of a pain to get to, and I usually would just go to a local parish church.
 
It is not rare to commit impurity, I have. Priests are trained to forget your confession. Next time, it might be easier to confess to a different priest. Remember, even the Pope goes to confession!
 
Cecilia_Dympna said:
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Shy_christian:
I’m a female and I know it’s rare but I committed acts of impurity
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Not rare. Entirely normal.

And the priest has already forgotten your confession.
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Something like 70% of women will have done the same at some point in their lives. VERY far from unusual - so be at peace, you probably won’t even be the only female that day who has confessed it to your priest.
 
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If you do not feel comfortable, try to go to another church for confession, one in which the priest hearing the confession cannot directly see you (many parishes have set up confession in a way that the priest cannot directly see the person confessing). And then continue going to Mass at another parish if that helps you to feel better, but do not stop going to confession if you need to.

Also stay busy , never stay idle, that way you will not have time to think in other things. Pray and ask our Lord to help you, having full confidence that God wants us to become holy and will provide us with everything we need to achieve it.

God Bless
 
I almost always go to confession to a priest that I don’t really know. You could check most church bulletins in your area for their confession times at the following link:
parishesonline.com
 
I’m Reformed, but due to a very particular ecumenical history the bishop here allows baptized Christians to confess (not looking for anyone to jump at the bishop here). I’ve confessed really embarrassing things to a priest who is both a friend and someone I work with. He doesn’t seem to think any less of me.
 
OP. I think the priest would be surprised if you didn’t confess sins of purity every once in a while considering the culture we live in today.

First, the priest can never ever say anything to anyone about what you have confessed and that includes you when you leave the confessional. You would have to tell him what you would like to talk to him about at another occasion than confession in a similar fashion like: “I know that sins of impurity are common and I need help to combat those sins myself as our secular culture is not supportive of living a chaste life………”. Second, the priest can’t say to anyone, including the police, that you have been to confession and that he has heard it. If he does, there would be very sever consequences for him like never hearing confessions ever again.

I have had to ask a confessor after a couple of days about some words that he had said to me in the confessional as it didn’t make any sense. He couldn’t remember what he had said and that it was too long (as in two three weeks) ago. We simply left it.

The priest is there to help you reach eternal life. That is his mission in life.
 
Shy_christian said:
Hi please I need help

I’m a female and I know it’s rare but I committed acts of impurity. I had a good confession but since then I keep feeling akward, or ashamed. And I’m afraid to see the priest again for he knows me. And I go for Mass daily every two weeks. Please help!!! God bless
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Be at peace. The priest has forgotten your sins by now and besides they’ve “heard it all”.
 
It is said the devil might tempt u after confession in a sense by making you guilty and doubting your sins are forgiven. Don’t listen to him. Just keep praying and sin no more. You will be ok.
 
Shy_christian said:
Hi please I need help

I’m a female and I know it’s rare but I committed acts of impurity. I had a good confession but since then I keep feeling akward, or ashamed. And I’m afraid to see the priest again for he knows me. And I go for Mass daily every two weeks. Please help!!! God bless
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It’s okay to feel this way! I too struggle with impurity - daily!

You won’t believe how many times I’ve confessed this sin in the confessional. Of course there are many different ways we can be impure, either by thought or actions.

The last time I confessed, it was really hard for me because of what I had done. I was almost crying in the confessional, I had never felt so much sorrow over a sin before. I was truly mortified at what I had done!

Even after I received absolution, there was still a little lingering of shame, but I knew I had to shake it off, because I had been forgiven and Christ had blotted out my sin. It is the devil who loves to fill our hearts with despair to keep us away from Christ!

I know we can feel great shame over acts of impurity, especially if we struggle with these sins. This is certainly an area where the devil attacks us most.

If it helps, I confess these sins to the same priest over and over again at my parish, and not once has he denied me absolution. He told me “If a priest can’t handle hearing someone who struggles with a particular sin confess it over and over again, then this man should not be a priest.”

Stay close to Our Blessed Mother, she will help you with purity. You are not alone! Believe me, there are more humans out there who struggle with this sin than you may realize. I’d argue so much as to say sexual sins are probably the most commonly confessed sins in the confessional. Our fallen human nature is simply so inclined towards them.
 
Those feeling are temptations. They are allowed purely to tempt you not to go to confession and so not to receive the body, blood, soul and divinity of Christ. You are in the midst of a spiritual battle. You do not ever want to trust your own emotions. Instead flee to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and hide there. There is no shame in fleeing from temptations it is the wisest thing to do, countless saints advise this action as does Jesus himself when he tells us to come to him. Use your imagination to flee to his heart or a simple prayer you make up. Or the Anime Christi or just ask Jesus to hide me in the wounds. Mary and your angel can help.ypu too. God bless you.
 
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I’ve been there. I knew my priest pretty well prior to my first confession and I had a lot of very bad things and embarrassing things to confess (it should all be embarrassing, honestly, but I’m glad it’s not). He knew who I was when I entered the confessional since I pretty much outed myself. After hearing decades worth of sins he gave me good and comforting advice, gave me my penance and absolution and I was free of them. I remember wanting to go find a different church to confess at but once it was done it didn’t matter anymore and father never looked at me funny or said anything to suggest that he was affected in any way. In fact, even though he has moved parishes, we are still in contact and I’m quite glad of his friendship and advice. The point being, his vocation is to help us keep our communion with God, not to judge us.

I still get that feeling occasionally in spite of the above experience, but I just pray to Our Lady to help me make a good confession, bite the bullet and do it and it’s always a blessing. Nothing bad has ever come from going to confession.

God bless.
 
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