Feminology: Two "Hypothetical" Situations

[whatevergirl]

That* is **actually clearer, even though I was being rhetorical in my response with the

But, yes that IS clearer.

It would appear she is just a friendly girl who sends mixed messages, from this newer post. I used to be friendly back in college like this, until a male friend of mine scolded me that my friendliness could be often times be construed for flirtatiousness. (he liked me more than a friend, I was clueless) I think that might be it, but might not. Just my thoughts.*

 

[joandarc2008]

It also could be that the flattery bolsters her self-esteem but she is not interested and she did not realize the full impact she was having on him as you had stated she later said she was clueless that he had feelings.

 

[Consecrated]

What an intriguing way to look at these scenarios…I hadn’t given this consideration. You could be right, Joan.

the problem with this, as I understand the scenario, is that when the man does own up to his feelings, the girl backs off and denies wanting a relationship.

 

[Consecrated]

OK I believe the woman in thread wants a RELATIONSHIP but is waiting for the guy to ask. Because the guy has not asked despite her perpetual flirting and sending signals she wants to make sure she avoids behavior that could make her seem unchaste or invite temptation as she is not even sure she is in a relationship much less looking at a potential spouse. Gosh, men can be confusing and thank God I am married.

Chevalier- I feel bad for those in the single vocations- you have my empathy.

the problem with this, as I understand the scenario, is that when the man does own up to his feelings, the girl backs off and denies wanting a relationship.

 

[chevalier]

Yup, ladies, both of your theories look viable. In fact, the truth could be somewhere in between. I’d still need to fill some gaps with conjecture because some of the behaviour looks incredibly dating-like, but I guess that can be blamed on the subconscious and/or some notions of courtesy. Or do we get any other theories?

the problem with this, as I understand the scenario, is that when the man does own up to his feelings, the girl backs off and denies wanting a relationship.

Yes, that is true, although it took the man a while, he had doubts and was attracted to another girl in the meantine and then he was already having a “non-date” with a new-found girl the day after the second time she turned him down (he asked her to reconsider after the first time), so it can’t have been such a strong thing for him. Conversely, if it hit the girl less hard than him, it probably was no more than attraction and/or instinct connection for her (if), although he was surprised by some of the affection she showed him and by how she apparently wanted to look pretty when going out with him, so I’m not fully certain. What puzzles me is not her denial (it may well have cooled off, lost appeal etc. by that stage) but the claim it was always just friends from the beginning. That kinda clashes with my knowledge of such things and my people sense.