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I have a catholic friend who truly is a christian and goes to mass every week and is a part of catholic groups on campus. She does not believe in the immaculate conception or that Mary was sinless. I told her that she couldn’t hold these beliefs and be catholic. Which she did not understand. How do you guys deal with these kind of things? Should I tell her priest? How can I explain this so she does not get offended?
 
You may want to find her a book on Church doctrine, such as a Catecism or one specifically on the Immaculate Conception or on St. Bernedette.
 
Does your friend actually deny the Church teaching on Mary or does she just not know intellectually that it is true? There is a distinction. A Catholic cannot reject the teaching on Mary. He can admit she does not intellectually understand but defers to the wisdom of the Church.

Many Catholics, in the midst of a Protestant culture, will take on many Protestant ideas without ever completely seeking proper Catholic understanding, particularly unique Catholic teachings such as Mary, papal infallibility and contraception. In doing so, they sometimes throw out the baby with the bathwater. In the case of Mary, she may be so concerned about Protestant charges of idolatry that he fails to truly understand the gift that Christ has given us in the teachings about His mother. So it may be helpful to find a number of good selections on this site which concisely explain the Church’s teaching on Mary and make it clear that Catholics in no way fall into any kind of heretical practice in Her devotions to Mary. To the contrary, the value in helping people understand Marian doctrine is to help them see the efficacy of our devotion to her for strengthening our relationship with her Son! All teachings on Mary lead to an understanding that Mary’s sole purpose in the Church is to lead us constantly back to her Son! Remember what she tells the stewards at the wedding feast at Cana regarding Christ: “Do what He tells you”.
 
Why?

Does she know that the Eastern churches also believe that Our Lady is sinless? Their understanding of original sin and its effects is somewhat different, theologically, speaking, which is why they do not speak of the Immaculate Conception in the same terms, but they certainly understand her sinlessness, and proclaim it repeatedly in their liturgy.
 
I did not get into the why because I agree. She did not think it was necessary for her to believe in it to be a catholic because all of her other beliefs match up with RCC dogma. I said she was wrong and she had to she said I haven’t read the CCC and I am not catholic so I cannot tell her that she is wrong. I left it there and we moved onto a less controversial topic
 
I would suggest that she keep her beliefs open to the possibility of our beliefs about Mary and keep seeking the truth. If we trust than the things of God can be revealed to us, but if we have a closed mind about things of the faith, than nothing can be revealed. And as we are witnesses to Jesus Christ, there are many witnesses to the truths of Mary as well. If there weren’t it wouldn’t be part of our beliefs so strongly.
 
I would get her a copy of Catholicism for Dummies. She really needs to learn her faith. If she doubts any portion of Catholic teaching, is she not being hypocritical to remain a member? If she doesn’t want the book, read it yourself! There is nothing better than to know the truth about the Catholic Church - whether you ever consider it or not.
 
Are you sure she means the Immaculate Conception? Many people, even Catholics astoundingly, confuse it with the Virgin Birth.
 
Protestor said:
I have a catholic friend who truly is a christian and goes to mass every week and is a part of catholic groups on campus. She does not believe in the immaculate conception or that Mary was sinless. I told her that she couldn’t hold these beliefs and be catholic. Which she did not understand. How do you guys deal with these kind of things? Should I tell her priest? How can I explain this so she does not get offended?
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I would tell your friend that Catholic doctrinal beliefs about Mary, including the Immaculate Conception and the sinlessness of Mary, are actually “corollaries” to Catholic beliefs about the nature of God, the Bible, and salvation.
 
If she doesn’t believe that, but she believe “all other” things that the church teaches, then by default she has to believe it because the Church teaches that on matters of faith the dogmas cannot be errant. So while she may have a hard time accepting it, as a Catholic, she has to defer to the the authority of the church on the matter. Make sense?
 
Not sure if this will help, it is a summary from the Catechism of the Catholic Church (online source is: usccb.org/beliefs-and-teachings/what-we-believe/catechism/catechism-of-the-catholic-church/epub/index.cfm#
IN BRIEF
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508 From among the descendants of Eve, God chose the Virgin Mary to be the mother of his Son. “Full of grace,” Mary is “the most excellent fruit of redemption” (SC 103): from the first instant of her conception, she was totally preserved from the stain of original sin and she remained pure from all personal sin throughout her life.
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509 Mary is truly “Mother of God” since she is the mother of the eternal Son of God made man, who is God himself.
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510 Mary “remained a virgin in conceiving her Son, a virgin in giving birth to him, a virgin in carrying him, a virgin in nursing him at her breast, always a virgin” (St. Augustine, Serm. 186, 1: PL 38, 999): with her whole being she is “the handmaid of the Lord” (Lk 1:38).
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511 The Virgin Mary “cooperated through free faith and obedience in human salvation” (LG 56). She uttered her yes “in the name of all human nature” (St. Thomas Aquinas, STh III, 30, 1). By her obedience she became the new Eve, mother of the living.
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Suggest that you look at the previous paragraphs as well as the summary, because they link into the Bible. If she thinks the Church is plain wrong, then armed with the Catechism paragraphs under your belt you could politely ask her for Biblical proof. I suspect that the conversation would cease at that point.
 
Protestor said:
I have a catholic friend who truly is a christian and goes to mass every week and is a part of catholic groups on campus. She does not believe in the immaculate conception or that Mary was sinless. I told her that she couldn’t hold these beliefs and be catholic. Which she did not understand. How do you guys deal with these kind of things? Should I tell her priest? How can I explain this so she does not get offended?
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If I were you, I would go to the priest on campus and tell him (without naming names) that of your certain knowledge there are Catholics on campus who do not believe in basic beliefs and say that they don’t ‘have to’, or ‘the church is wrong’. Then the priest can get one of those ‘catholic groups on campus’ to start offering 'Catholicism for Dummies" or “Catholic refresher 101”, plus he can mention in the bulletin and his homilies that young (and old!) Catholics who think the Church is ‘wrong’ in certain beliefs are doing so in ERROR and that as a priest who is responsible for their souls, he needs to reemphasize that this kind of ‘pick and choose belief’ is actually dissent, a serious matter which endangers the soul.
 
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