For married people, how many dates until you found your spouse?

[Xloaves_IIfish]

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I am interested in how much dating/courting it took for married people to found their spouse. Do most people find a spouse right away (first boyfriend/girlfriend), or does it take several dates? (By “date”, I mean different girlfriends or boyfriends.)

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I am interested in how much dating/courting it took for married people to found their spouse. Do most people find a spouse right away (first boyfriend/girlfriend), or does it take several dates? (By “date”, I mean different girlfriends or boyfriends.)

Oh man, for me it was a fair amount. Probably dated 8 or 9 serious people. But more if you count just casual dating. My wife on the other hand. 1 Me.

 

[HoneyBea]

I never dated I just slept around a lot. My husband was my first “real” boyfriend and my last : )

 

[Oneofthewomen]

I voted 2-3, but they were not “serious” relationships, as I was in high school.
I met my husband at the end of my senior year and that was my first and only serious relationship. We’ve been together 26 years and married 23.

 

[valekhai]

My wife is the second person I dated. First was in high school and not at all serious.

 

[KendraDZ1902]

My husband was my 5th boyfriend.

 

[Kelfa28]

For me, there is a huge difference between someone you date and someone you would consider a boyfriend/girlfriend.

I’ve had two boyfriends before I met my husband. Both were short lived relationships at under a year each.
I dated my husband for 4 years before we got married.

However, when it comes to individual dates I’ve had?

I literally have no idea what the number is. It’s a huge number though. Guys would ask me out and we’d go out on a date. I’d meet lots of people from school, through friends, through relatives, and eventually through a dating website.

We’d go out once or twice. Maybe to dinner and a movie or go somewhere interesting and that would be it. We’d be done.

I don’t consider them boyfriends at all. Huge difference.

 

[jamaro]

Depending on how you count, I’d say either 2 or 3.

I liked to joke that I was the kind of girl you dated when you were ready to settle down, because all of them were engaged within 2 years of dating me.

 

[phil19034]

I voted 2-3 because I married the 3rd person I fell in love with.

But I dated more than I can count. Usually it was one or two dates and then done. Others maybe a few weeks and done. If I didn’t think the girl was the marrying type, I usually broke it off. Others lasted a few weeks and fizzled out for some reason. There are a few I probably didn’t give a fare chance, but if I did, then perhaps I might not have met my wife.

 

[Xloaves_IIfish]

For me, there is a huge difference between someone you date and someone you would consider a boyfriend/girlfriend.

I’ve had two boyfriends before I met my husband. Both were short lived relationships at under a year each.
I dated my husband for 4 years before we got married.

However, when it comes to individual dates I’ve had?

I literally have no idea what the number is. It’s a huge number though. Guys would ask me out and we’d go out on a date. I’d meet lots of people from school, through friends, through relatives, and eventually through a dating website.

We’d go out once or twice. Maybe to dinner and a movie or go somewhere interesting and that would be it. We’d be done.

I don’t consider them boyfriends at all. Huge difference.

Yes, I realize that there is a difference, I had a hard time communicating in words the meaning I was going for… I was thinking of the more serious relationships, the ones that had an actual discernment of marriage. I know that people go out on more casual dates too. I should have written this in my original post, but it’s unfortunately too late. Sorry for the confusing wording!

 

[Xloaves_IIfish]

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I am interested in how much dating/courting it took for married people to found their spouse. Do most people find a spouse right away (first boyfriend/girlfriend), or does it take several relationships? (By “date”, I mean different girlfriends or boyfriends in relationships that were more serious, ie discerning marriage.)

 

[Usige]

Yes, I realize that there is a difference, I had a hard time communicating in words the meaning I was going for… I was thinking of the more serious relationships, the ones that had an actual discernment of marriage. I know that people go out on more casual dates too. I should have written this in my original post, but it’s unfortunately too late. Sorry for the confusing wording!

Ah well then subtract one from the 2-3 and move it to one. I had two girlfriends in highschool. The first was only semi serious (we only dated 3 months) and well I’m married to the second one. We’ve been together 23 years and married just shy of 20 (had to wait 3 years until she finished highschool ) I never did the whole casual dating thing as I couldn’t see the point.

 

[MarkEzraB]

Two for me had one serious girlfriend before I met my wife. Going on 9 years of marriage now

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

0, or 1 I guess since we are counting spouses. I’ve only ever dated my wife. I don’t know what happened, I had just gotten to years old 24 and I had never dated anyone. It kinda sucked to be honest with you, I would have liked to explore more.

But oh well, I suppose some people would consider themselves lucky to find the right one the first time around.

 

[Lorelei12]

Like some of the other posters, I went out on a bunch of casual dates that never made it past one or two. Nobody I considered marrying.

I had one serious relationship before my husband. I actually met my husband while I was dating him, but we didn’t begin our relationship until about a year and a half later.

 

[Kelfa28]

Yes, I realize that there is a difference, I had a hard time communicating in words the meaning I was going for… I was thinking of the more serious relationships, the ones that had an actual discernment of marriage. I know that people go out on more casual dates too. I should have written this in my original post, but it’s unfortunately too late. Sorry for the confusing wording!

I definitely understand.

Actually, it really is tough trying to articulate the differences because so many people don’t court or discern marriage anymore when they do date. Even when someone calls a relationship “serious” they may not mean marriage.

If you wanted to know how many times I’ve been with someone I’ve discerned marriage with? It’s just one person: my husband.

The other two relationships were “serious” but I never considered either of them to be marriage material. This is why we broke it off after less then a year of dating.

 

[bernadettefaith]

I had one boyfriend (at a very young age ) and the relationship lasted about 7 months. My husband and I started dating when I was almost 16. He has never had any other dates or relationships at all.

 

[Serap]

I dated a million guys b4 I met my husband. It was so disappointing. Mr Wrong after Mr Wrong…I was 30 when I met DH.

 

[E_7]

Apart from having something with someone twice my age without ever meeting in person, I say I dated no man before I exclusively courted my husband . I don’t do dates. I believe why date if you’re not looking for marriage? Why bother? My husband was my first kiss, first man I held hands with besides my dad’s, and first man I hugged besides my dad. First man I had any kind of skin-ship was my husband. Once you are sure of your vocation (you get a call from God that this is what he wants from you) then you can open your heart and follow God’s Will and you will soon meet your husband to be after lots of prayer.

 

[SubjectVerb]

Oh man, for me it was a fair amount. Probably dated 8 or 9 serious people. But more if you count just casual dating. My wife on the other hand. 1 Me.

Same here. I had to kiss a lot of frogs to find my knight. My husband was lucky. I was the first serious girlfriend.