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BEattitude
Guest
I would like to hear what are the biggest temptations for men to lust. I think this is news to any woman, and I believe it would really help them understand what to avoid as to not tempt a man.
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Riley259
Guest
Women dressing provocatively, tv shows with scantily clad women and couples engaging in explicit fornication, tv ads that show women in minimal states of dress (ex., Victoria Secrets ads), Magazines at supermarkets with provocatively and scandalously dressed celebrities…the list goes on and on. It’s bad out there!
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Karin
Guest
should we all dress like this so all you “men” dont get tempted? as it would seem that everything on God’s Green Earth is tempting you guys
http://devagares.weblog.com.pt/burka.jpg
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BEattitude
Guest
It seems like even the wind blowing the wrong way will do it!should we all dress like this so all you “men” dont get tempted? as it would seem that everything on God’s Green Earth is tempting you guys
AEIOU.pt
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JimG
Guest
Well, it could. A friend of mine once told me that during his high school years he was kept in a constant state of sexual arousal by (among other things) the perfume worn by a girl who sat next to him! As well as the fact that the girls did dress to attract boys. But he’s much younger than me. It was a little easier in my day-the girls wore uniforms then!
If you compare the state of general culture today vs fifty years ago, it’s apparent that there is just more temptation around, everything from clothing styles to advertising, to–especially–the internet.
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LovedForever
Guest
Females KNOW what attracts men (physically that is). And women who are ‘desperate’ for a man’s attention will resort to presenting their PHYSICAL attributes in order to get that attention. It is I think, part of the “instanct gratification” problem our society is ensnared in. Why take the time to get to know one another (a risk for some who don’t feel deep down that they have much to offer) - when I can wear revealing clothing, talk and act seductively - and POW! I’ve got his attention right away!
There are many, many insecure and lonely girls and women out there. Deep down they are simply desperate to be “cherished” and “loved.” That’s how God designed us.
Sadly, they will settle for what temporarily FEELS like love - and resort to seduction and cheap hook-ups that in the end do anything but make them feel “cherished” or any kind of authentic LOVE.
This is a great article written by Dennis Prager on this very subject:
"Why Young Women Are Exposing Themselves"
Part One:
townhall.com/columnists/DennisPrager/2004/02/17/why_young_women_are_exposing_themselves_part_one
Part Two:
townhall.com/columnists/DennisPrager/2004/02/24/why_young_women_are_exposing_themselves_part_two
There are many, many insecure and lonely girls and women out there. Deep down they are simply desperate to be “cherished” and “loved.” That’s how God designed us.
Sadly, they will settle for what temporarily FEELS like love - and resort to seduction and cheap hook-ups that in the end do anything but make them feel “cherished” or any kind of authentic LOVE.
This is a great article written by Dennis Prager on this very subject:
"Why Young Women Are Exposing Themselves"
Part One:
townhall.com/columnists/DennisPrager/2004/02/17/why_young_women_are_exposing_themselves_part_one
Part Two:
townhall.com/columnists/DennisPrager/2004/02/24/why_young_women_are_exposing_themselves_part_two
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AntonMurphy
Guest
Modesty is a two-way street.
Women should expend effort to wear clothing that doesn’t call attention to themselves in an immodest way. I’ve heard it said that one should take the Virgin Mary along with you when buying clothes.
The other, probably more important argument is that men have to be prepared to be bombarded by sexuality the minute they enter the outside world every day. I’m sick of hearing sermons on how women need to cover themselves up like mummies in order for men not to look at them lustfully. Yes, it is distracting when women wear immodest clothing, and the more immodest, the more difficult it is to look away.
Jesus says that if a man has lust in his heart he has already committed adultery with the woman. Where are the sermons on turning off the television, not going to the bikini beach, or remaining pure in your heart despite the situation? The fact of the matter is that men and women have an equal part to play in purity. However, I’ll still sin if I give into a lustful look, and it’s my fault. Maybe the women was wearing something a little immodest, but I was the one sinning.
If I were a priest, I would focus more on what should men do when faced with immodest situations, rather than women shouldn’t create immodest situations for men. Why? Because a sermon is only heard by those in the church. It will do a soldier little good to hear reasons why their enemy shouldn’t attack, they need to be trained on how to avoid the attacks successfully, and live.
Women should expend effort to wear clothing that doesn’t call attention to themselves in an immodest way. I’ve heard it said that one should take the Virgin Mary along with you when buying clothes.
The other, probably more important argument is that men have to be prepared to be bombarded by sexuality the minute they enter the outside world every day. I’m sick of hearing sermons on how women need to cover themselves up like mummies in order for men not to look at them lustfully. Yes, it is distracting when women wear immodest clothing, and the more immodest, the more difficult it is to look away.
Jesus says that if a man has lust in his heart he has already committed adultery with the woman. Where are the sermons on turning off the television, not going to the bikini beach, or remaining pure in your heart despite the situation? The fact of the matter is that men and women have an equal part to play in purity. However, I’ll still sin if I give into a lustful look, and it’s my fault. Maybe the women was wearing something a little immodest, but I was the one sinning.
If I were a priest, I would focus more on what should men do when faced with immodest situations, rather than women shouldn’t create immodest situations for men. Why? Because a sermon is only heard by those in the church. It will do a soldier little good to hear reasons why their enemy shouldn’t attack, they need to be trained on how to avoid the attacks successfully, and live.
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JimG
Guest
I read the short articles linked above by “Loved Forever.” Interesting. The analysis does ring pretty much true.
In my youth I loved to ride the city buses in the springtime, because then all the women and girls were beginning to appear in their spring clothing: it was feminine and colorful, attractive, and showed more of their figures than the drab winter clothes, yet it was not an incitement to lust. (In those days people rode buses and shopped downtown.) The girls were, in a word, pretty. And I liked that.
But “pretty” is not a word often used by boys anymore when speaking of girls. Now, they are “hot” or “sexy.”
Certainly, as Anton noted, it is not a girl’s sole responsibility to help boys avoid lust. The friend I mentioned above was not blameless; he sought out girls for sex. But his interest began in earnest when he, at the age of 15, was seduced by an 18 year old girl for sex.
In my youth I loved to ride the city buses in the springtime, because then all the women and girls were beginning to appear in their spring clothing: it was feminine and colorful, attractive, and showed more of their figures than the drab winter clothes, yet it was not an incitement to lust. (In those days people rode buses and shopped downtown.) The girls were, in a word, pretty. And I liked that.
But “pretty” is not a word often used by boys anymore when speaking of girls. Now, they are “hot” or “sexy.”
Certainly, as Anton noted, it is not a girl’s sole responsibility to help boys avoid lust. The friend I mentioned above was not blameless; he sought out girls for sex. But his interest began in earnest when he, at the age of 15, was seduced by an 18 year old girl for sex.
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Mirdath
Guest
As far as I can tell, anything and everything.
I passed a group of college guys out running on my way to work this morning and… wow, they had great legs. In very short shorts. After an ice storm.
If you’re going to require women to dress modestly, lead by example, hm?
I didn’t see anything in there about men dressing modestly
I passed a group of college guys out running on my way to work this morning and… wow, they had great legs. In very short shorts. After an ice storm.If you’re going to require women to dress modestly, lead by example, hm?
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Chancellare
Guest
Lust is just the end result of corrupted sense of beauty which is indeed in the eye of the beholder. God gave us eyes and artistic sense to appreciate beauty in the context of filial love and the dignity of persons as God’s children. But because people corrupted their sense of beauty by greed, commercialism and exploitation, it is now difficult to appreciate it in the way that God wanted us to see it. Pope JP II’s Theology of the Body explains this further.
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Karin
Guest
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hoosierdaddy
Guest
I don’t like when women wear mini skirts to church…and then sit right in front of you. Then you have to look all around you when you stand to sing. At times I have just moved. Other times I’ve stood there with the hymnal in front of my face instead of looking at the words on the screen.
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Mijoy2
Guest
I don’t buy it. Watch a man swiching through TV stations with a remote in his hand. As he comes across channels with scantily clad women he almost can’t help himself to not slow the process of clicking down. Watch a woman do the same, if she comes across a channel with a scantily clad man she either doesn’t notice or she almost grimises. Justr picture the man on the public beach with his speedo on. My experience is women laugh at the sight, not lust. It is pretty funny to look at.As far as I can tell, anything and everything.
I didn’t see anything in there about men dressing modestly
If you’re going to require women to dress modestly, lead by example, hm?
Maybe I’m in the minority here but I don’t think women are nearly as enticed by nearly naked men as men are by nearly naked women. It’s ho hum.
It’s funny, men who are not attempting to lead a more virtuous life consider a glance at a woman in immodest dress a form of entertainment, almost a refreshment like a donut with a cup of coffee. Men who do attempt to lead a virtuous life consider a glance at a woman in immodest dress much like a bad memory or thought. He gets a bit of a painful feeling in stomach. He tries to shake the thought but a part of him wants to dwell on it.
I personally hope to discover in the next life why God made the desire so disproportional with the need. Why give us something so powerfully desireable only to forbid it? Maybe it’s God’s way of making the end of our earthly walk not be something to dread. It’s His way of saying, “you have suffered enough, now come home and I’ll relieve you of this torment”. Anyone who thinks it’s just a simple matter of the will is mistaken. It’s a life long battle and present day society only throws fuel on the fire. I sometimes welcome old age. And to be honest, sometimes miss the days when I looked on this as a donut. They were easier in some ways.
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Mirdath
Guest
Oh, women lust tooI don’t buy it. Watch a man swiching through TV stations with a remote in his hand. As he comes across channels with scantily clad women he almost can’t help himself to not slow the process of clicking down. Watch a woman do the same, if she comes across a channel with a scantily clad man she either doesn’t notice or she almost grimises. Justr picture the man on the public beach with his speedo on. My experience is women laugh at the sight, not lust. It is pretty funny to look at.
And with the tv example, if there’s a woman around and the guy knows what’s good for him, he’ll speed up the clicking. It does go both ways.Also, most guys on the beach just don’t know how to look good or don’t bother – and let’s face it, speedos are hilarious
That definitely depends on the man.
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lizaanne
Guest
Just some random thoughts on this subject that came to me while eating lunch and passing through this thread:
There is lust, and there is appreciation. I believe that a man or woman has the ability to appreciate an attractive person, female or male, without being lustful or sexually aroused. I can totally appreciate the joggers with the good legs, and yes I’ll take a good long look. Does it mean I’m sexually aroused? No, I just appreciate a good looking man, that’s all.
An attractive woman is attractive no matter what. You can take a beautiful woman and put a burlap bag on her and she can still be sexy and attractive. While dress is important, it’s not the entire equation when it comes to this subject.
Final random thought - dressing well and looking nice while not being provocative is possible. But it starts early, and mother’s have to be the example of this. I know of two absolutely GORGEOUS young adult girls who dress just like the little pop-divas, every single day. Skirts so short you can see their panties, tight and low cut tops, and bare middles. In the summer they hardly have clothes on. They have been called names, and even some of their family members have said things about how they dress. Their mother’s response is that they have the bodies and they looks to get away with it now, they might as well do it now while they can, because no one stays that way forever.
It breaks my heart. They are good girls, but are selling themselves for a cheap thrill. And their mother is so very guilty of assisting them in this.
So - for what it’s worth, there are some random thoughts over a bowl of noodles today.
~Liza
There is lust, and there is appreciation. I believe that a man or woman has the ability to appreciate an attractive person, female or male, without being lustful or sexually aroused. I can totally appreciate the joggers with the good legs, and yes I’ll take a good long look. Does it mean I’m sexually aroused? No, I just appreciate a good looking man, that’s all.
An attractive woman is attractive no matter what. You can take a beautiful woman and put a burlap bag on her and she can still be sexy and attractive. While dress is important, it’s not the entire equation when it comes to this subject.
Final random thought - dressing well and looking nice while not being provocative is possible. But it starts early, and mother’s have to be the example of this. I know of two absolutely GORGEOUS young adult girls who dress just like the little pop-divas, every single day. Skirts so short you can see their panties, tight and low cut tops, and bare middles. In the summer they hardly have clothes on. They have been called names, and even some of their family members have said things about how they dress. Their mother’s response is that they have the bodies and they looks to get away with it now, they might as well do it now while they can, because no one stays that way forever.
It breaks my heart. They are good girls, but are selling themselves for a cheap thrill. And their mother is so very guilty of assisting them in this.
So - for what it’s worth, there are some random thoughts over a bowl of noodles today.
~Liza
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dranzal
Guest
Lust is dangerous. My wife and I both post as dranzal, but this is the husband talking. I’ve had problems with lust that plagued me long after I knew it was a bad thing. Old age is definitely a blessing that makes it easier to fight against. So is a radical change in perspective, like really truly seeing the corruption and the depravity that lurks in each visual cue. The problem is guys are both easily aroused and very directly linked to visual cues. My wife says for women there is a stronger mental link than visual, and what is covered and left to imagination is more flattering on men. I guess that means scanty clothing is easier for them to see as a laughable parody to the true beauty of the body than it is for those of us who just get sex signals straight from our eyeballs. Visual stimulation starts up the lust cycle, and also often the lust just starts on its own and then influences what thoughts pop into your head, or influences what we notice in our surroundings. It becomes a war where thoughts try to creep in and you try to blast them out, the animal instinct to stop your eyes at the first enticing flash of skin tone has to be responded to with an equally willful and quick forcing of the eyes away–and it can all happen several times per second.
Anything you girls out there can do to cover visual cues to stall this vicious cycle is GREATLY appreciated, and is even more based in kindness, mercy and understanding than it is in your personal responsibility. Please understand that it does help a great deal.
Also, we need to instill in young men how incredibly important it is not to start down the wrong path. Any sin pertaining to lust in your past becomes fuel for your entire future. If you thought it, felt it, or saw it, it becomes something that gets used against you forever. If you never saw sex in pictures, in your imagination, or in your experience, the pictures don’t pop into your head as much, nor are they likely to do so with as much realism and clarity. If you’re careful about what you dwell on or think about, it’s probably possible in a more ideal society to marry and make your spouse your sole link to realistic images of sex.
This is a lifelong all-out war for all of us.
Anything you girls out there can do to cover visual cues to stall this vicious cycle is GREATLY appreciated, and is even more based in kindness, mercy and understanding than it is in your personal responsibility. Please understand that it does help a great deal.
Also, we need to instill in young men how incredibly important it is not to start down the wrong path. Any sin pertaining to lust in your past becomes fuel for your entire future. If you thought it, felt it, or saw it, it becomes something that gets used against you forever. If you never saw sex in pictures, in your imagination, or in your experience, the pictures don’t pop into your head as much, nor are they likely to do so with as much realism and clarity. If you’re careful about what you dwell on or think about, it’s probably possible in a more ideal society to marry and make your spouse your sole link to realistic images of sex.
This is a lifelong all-out war for all of us.
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FiremanFrank
Guest
The thing that leads me most to thoughts of lust is …
My mind.
My mind.
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JimG
Guest
I would say the leading temptation comes from the imagination rather than the mind.
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FiremanFrank
Guest
Pretty much splitting theological hairs here my friend.
As the imagination eminates directly from one’s mind.
And without the mind, there is no where from which imaginations may arise.
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StCsDavid
Guest
Maybe this is an age thing, or maybe my eyes have been so bombarded by the less than pure fashion statements that I experience in nearly Godless Portland, Oregon, but honestly if I see little miss thing in her low rise jeans with her whale tail (slang for thong underwear), I’m pretty much turned off. I feel kind of sorry for her as she is portraying a false reality of her own sexuality. I’m more likely to be attracted to sharp dressed, well put together woman.
Women can dress conservatively to help us guys out, but the bottom-line is that it’s our problem to deal with. I suppose if you were looking for a rule of thumb, look at yourself in the mirror and ask if you would want Blessed Mother to see you dressed that way?
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