Forcing parents to go to confession?

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Sir_Knight

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My daughter will be doing her first confession and first communon this school year and the director of religious education said that all parents are REQUIRED to go to confession with their child.

I have a bit of an issue with this. It isn’t the confession part because I’m a EMHC and I normally go to confession once a week (sometimes even twice a week) just before I distribute Holy Communion so that I can be as free from sin as possible but the fact that it is a REQUIREMENT on the part of the parents to go to confession.

Is this something new? How do others feel about this?
 
I think it’s good for parents to role model this for their kids, and it’s sad that the parish finds that not enough parents aren’t already doing this on their own.
 
Sir_Knight said:
My daughter will be doing her first confession and first communon this school year and the director of religious education said that all parents are REQUIRED to go to confession with their child.
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That seems odd. I think they should be encouraged, but I don’t think anything is gained by making it mandatory. That’s like a parent demanding an apology from their child. You may get one, but will it mean anything?
 
LittleRose said:
I think it’s good for parents to role model this for their kids, and it’s sad that the parish finds that not enough parents aren’t already doing this on their own.
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Yeah but what is gained by forcing a parent to go that one time if the rest of the time they do not go on their own?
 
I have never heard that it was required for the parents go to confession when their child has first confession. I did go to confession when my children had their first confessions - so show that I am doing what they are doing.

There are so many families who only get their children as far as 1st communion and then they forget all about church after that - until confirmation. I would hate to think that requiring parents to go to confession could have negative effects. Some parents may opt to skip the entire experience - kids skip it too. That would be a bad thing

Terry
 
Sir_Knight said:
Is this something new? How do others feel about this?
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You cannot canonically “require” anyone to go to Confession. In fact, there are many circumstances that would prohibit a parent from doing so including that a parent could be a non-Catholic or a parent could be in an irregular marriage or other situation such as this.

I think the religious ed director is out of line canonically. I would speak to the priest.
 
This is no doubt a stupid question, although honestly asked. Are you supposed to attend confession WITH your child or just go the same day. I assume that you are not in the booth (or whatever) with your child, are you?
 
I wonder what they do when the parents are not Catholic but raising their kids as Catholics ?
 
Sir_Knight said:
My daughter will be doing her first confession and first communon this school year and the director of religious education said that all parents are REQUIRED to go to confession with their child.

I have a bit of an issue with this. It isn’t the confession part because I’m a EMHC and I normally go to confession once a week (sometimes even twice a week) just before I distribute Holy Communion so that I can be as free from sin as possible but the fact that it is a REQUIREMENT on the part of the parents to go to confession.

Is this something new? How do others feel about this?
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No, no one can be required to go to Confession with their child. More specifically the Child cannot be required to Confess their sins with someone else present. In fact it would be seen as a violation of the seal to allow or require someone to be present who is not needed (like an interpreter would be) to hear someone elses Confession.
 
LittleRose said:
I think it’s good for parents to role model this for their kids, and it’s sad that the parish finds that not enough parents aren’t already doing this on their own.
Click to expand...
I have never heard of parents accompanying their child in the Sacrament of Confession?
 
I’m sorry if I was unclear. The actual confession is between the confessor and the priest but the three of us stand in line together. One parent goes in first to confess. When done, the parent exits and the child goes in. When done, the child exists and the other parent goes in.
 
Sir_Knight said:
I’m sorry if I was unclear. The actual confession is between the confessor and the priest but the three of us stand in line together. One parent goes in first to confess. When done, the parent exits and the child goes in. When done, the child exists and the other parent goes in.
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Ok, That however is still not allowed to “require” anyone to go to Confession.

You simply go in and say: Bless me Father, I’m not here for Confession. I was told I was required to be here. Did you see that game last night? …
 
Would it kill you to go to confess with your kid? Regardless of whose idea it is?
 
At my parish they strongly encourage it, I think because many parents are not normally churchgoers. They make them attend while the children are preparing, because it used to be that people would want first communion even if they never went to church. Many of them, once they get through the first communion, they stop going after a bit.

So, I think the motivation is to get the parents back in good graces before the big day, even if it’s a bit forced.
 
Sir_Knight said:
My daughter will be doing her first confession and first communon this school year and the director of religious education said that all parents are REQUIRED to go to confession with their child.
Click to expand...
They can’t require it. They can’t even require the kids to go. They could mention that it’s highly recommended, though, to set an example for the children.
 
Like a previous poster—I think the motivation is good—but it should be an encouragement-even a strong one–but not a requirement.

So what happens if the parents do not go to confession. Is the child still allowed to receive first Holy Communion.
 
Karin said:
LeahInancsi;1563178:
Would it kill you to go to confess with your kid? Regardless of whose idea it is?
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Not the point…the point is no one can make you go to confession.
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Exactly. That is not the point. As I said above, being a EMHC, I go to confession just prior to making my communion deliveries to the homebound. I usually go to confession once a week. Sometimes twice a week. Suppose I have a communion delivery on Friday and go to confession on Friday and my daughter’s first confession is on Saturday and I’m not conscious of any grave sin committed during those 24 hours?
 
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