Cat-
I don’t know if you have any familiarity with what was going on in the Charismatic covenant communities in the 70’s and 80’s, but I lived in a 1000+ member covenant community for 15 years. As most if not all of them did, it split up in the 90’s, but I have never known fellowship like I did then - before or since.
I think I understand exactly what you’re talking about, and a buddy of mine and I often wonder why we don’t see this in our parishes.
Is it just a gift? Or is it something we can create?
I think it’s a totally different culture and I don’t think the same kind of fellowship is likely in Catholic parishes.
Many Catholics here on CAF disparage the term “fellowship.” So when even the word is “suspect,” it’s not likely that it will come to pass.
In the Protestant churches, especially the Evangelical/charismatic (my husband grew up in the Assemblies of God through the 1960s and 70s), much of the social life takes place in the church or in homes doing church-related activities (e.g., cottage prayer meetings, cell groups, youth activities, etc.)
Evangelical churches do not call themselves “parishes,” which is actually a term for a neighborhood/geographic area. In Catholic churches, at least until fairly recently (last 40 years or so), people in any given church came from the same “parish” or neighborhood, so they went to the same schools (or the parish school), shopped in the same stores, and visited the same parks and recreational facilities regularly.
As others have described on this thread, Catholics enjoyed their “fellowship” and friendships OUTSIDE of the church building. So in Catholic churches, the people attended Mass and then left, and did most of their socializing with friends from their neighborhood. Yes, people joined the Rosary society, or various Catholic organizations that met in their church. But they didn’t socialize “in the church building.” Instead, they socialized in their homes, schools, parks, shopping centers, etc.
That’s why they see no point to “fellowship” activities in the church building. That kind of stuff belongs OUTSIDE of the church. Church should be Mass–just JESUS, not a lot of socializing and chatting and “networking.”
Think about it–many of the older Catholic churches (even through the 1970s–e.g., my church!) have no bathrooms on the first floor. This implies that they didn’t expect people to stick around very long–just an hour for Mass, and then they went home.
But Evangelical churches drew/draw their attendees and members from all over the geographic area. Remember the Sunday School buses that ranged far and wide to pick up church attendees? This meant/means that there was a mix of people from many different neighborhoods in the church, and outside of the church, these people were/are unlikely to mix or get together casually unless they get to know each other first in the church.
Things were/are different from the “parish model” in the Evangelical Protestant churches. Often these churches have activities scheduled for every day/evening of the week, and the activities involve all the different age groups.
My husband jokes that in his Assemblies of God church, a person can literally never leave the campus after they are born. They can be in the church daycare center, and then enter the school at age 3 (Kiddie Kollege), and stay in that church school all the way through college and grad school (yes, the church has a college!), and then be involved in the church activities, clubs, outreaches, committees, mission projects, etc. all through their adults years and only going home for necessary maintenance (sleep, shower). They can eat at the church in the coffee shop or restaurant. When they are old, they can be part of the Senior group and enter the church retirement center and eventually the nursing home and finally, have their funeral in that church. The only thing they can’t do is be buried there–the church, like many modern churches, has no cemetery.
Catholics, I’m not exaggerating! This is life in my husband’s childhood church! It’s very much a “fortress” of Christianity.
And it’s darn fun!
Don’t be too quick to criticize this kind of lifestyle. It’s really pleasant spending
all your time with like-minded people just praising God throughout your life and never really going outside the “fortress” walls. It’s very safe and comfortable. Everybody truly does know your name, and also they are quick to help you out when you have trouble or sickness or sadness in your life. It’s great. I miss it and I’m not ashamed to say that I miss this kind of life.
Perhaps you can see why many people would be attracted to this, and find the Catholic churches rather sterile and unfriendly nowadays. The “parish” model of Catholicism, at least in the U.S., is gone. Neighborhoods don’t really exist anymore; many of us spend so much time away from home that we don’t really know our neighbors or have anything in common with them. We all attend different schools and get bussed there. We shop all over, not just at neighborhood stores (which don’t exist anymore in most cities). We recreate at parks and facilities all over our city, and most of our children play sports for teams that are part of a National league or federation–no “vacant lot ballgames.” And those who go to bars don’t walk down the street to the neighborhood watering hole anymore–they drive to their favorite hangout, and often don’t even talk to anyone because they’re sitting in front of a video slot machine.
(continued next post)
