Getting over negative view of God

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I don’t want to ramble too much here. Just wondering if others have advice on this. I’ve realized lately how twisted my view of God seems and, frankly, I just don’t trust Him and don’t know how to change that.
 
Pray for Him to help you to trust more. Also, repeating the “Jesus, I trust in You” affirmation will help you trust Him more over time, in the same way as any affirmation works.
 
Hi there,

Do you normally have greater anxiety and worries than the average person? Do you look for reassurance or proof that God cares for you, and failure seems like proof that God is displeased and is punishing you?

I have the same problem of distorted idea of God, and I’m wondering if it’s psychological more than “spiritual”… There’s the desire to be proven wrong so that you can trust God, but that proof does not seem immediately perceptible…
 
I’m not sure I ever have. I wanted to. I guess I just feel so distant from Him and that’s been the norm for me. I’ve tried to strengthen my spiritual life for years and put forth a lot of time/effort and honestly I still don’t believe He wants anything to do with me. It’s not so much an issue of can God be loving or merciful but more like why would He be that way toward me? Sorry if that sounds wrong or selfish.
 
Not really that God has let me down. Just never can understand why some things happen but I don’t necessarily believe they were a result of God’s action.
 
I did believe God was punishing me for a while. Not sure I believe that anymore. More like He just doesn’t care and has given up on me. I can understand why He would because I continue to fail Him badly, but I do believe I’ve tried so I don’t know what else to do.
 
Take a risk if you want a sign. Small risk. One day of fasting when the only energy comes from you praying to Him.
God is not a fluffy thing most modern Christians present Him to be. But even as a rival, in your anger, you will see how much respects you and how sudden and sweet is His help. You have to see it. Jesus said He loves the truth. Yes He does. He will never condemn anyone solely on disagreeing with Him.
God bless.
 
“If you knew the gift of God!” The wonder of prayer is revealed beside the well where we come seeking water: there, Christ comes to meet every human being. It is he who first seeks us and asks us for a drink. Jesus thirsts; his asking arises from the depths of God’s desire for us. Whether we realize it or not, prayer is the encounter of God’s thirst with ours. God thirsts that we may thirst for him. - CCC 2560
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Everyone is unique so I don’t want to presume to have an answer for you. But a few humble suggestions:
  • As much as possible, infuse your life with prayer. Smiling to yourself when you see children at play can become a prayer. Anything not sinful can.
  • Read some good books. Maybe A Father Who Keeps His Promises. Might help incorporate some good perspective.
  • Participate in works of mercy and reflect on the source of goodness.
  • If you suspect you have a past that may be adulterating your view of God, perhaps seek counsel with a spiritual director, counselor, or support group.
 
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Our God is a loving Father, wanting the absolute best for us, which is total union with Him now and in the hereafter.

Read:

Call Him Father: How to Experience the Fatherhood of God
Edward G. Maristany

Can read it in one sitting…and you’ll want to both keep the book but also give it away!
 
I believe He interacts with some - just not me. I do believe He has just given up on me and feel like anything moving forward is a hopeless cause spiritually. I don’t want to think this and I try to find ways to avoid thinking it but at the end of the day I still do, which is probably sinful/wrong in itself but what am I supposed to do about that? I guess I just feel stuck.
 
Thank you. I have tried things like this many times. Maybe I’m just giving up too easily. It’s tiring though. It seems like everyone around me either tries really hard and has a great spiritual life/faith in God or they don’t try at all because they don’t care and thus just choose to proceed with life how they want. I always feel so stuck because I seem to care a lot. So much so that it really hurts thinking it might be a possibility God just doesn’t feel the same way about me. I hope this makes sense. It’s all I ever think about and it saddens me to think I may never be good enough (as much as we can be) for Him.
 
Thank you. This is good advice. I read very much and that’s one of the main ways I have tried to figure all this out over the years with no solution thus far. I’m currently reading Lord Have Mercy by Scott Hahn and it is very good. I have not read this book yet though and may check it out soon. I perhaps do have a past that is interfering with my view of God as much as I hate to admit that. God bless.
 
Thank you. I do very much enjoy reading about Mother Teresa and others who have felt similarly. I’m just not sure I could ever faithfully make it through life constantly doubting God. Not to mention I am far from a saint - at 24 hopefully I have many more years left for improvement there. God bless you.
 
marylg said:
I don’t want to ramble too much here. Just wondering if others have advice on this. I’ve realized lately how twisted my view of God seems and, frankly, I just don’t trust Him and don’t know how to change that.
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This is interesting. When Adam & Eve fell by eating of the fruit our catechism teaches that “They become afraid of the God of whom they have conceived a distorted image - that of a God jealous of his prerogatives.” CCC 399

This distorted image carries over to all humankind; it’s the way we start out in terms of our concept of God, as I’ve experienced it. It’s an aspect of our estrangement from God, the chief element in Original Sin. The “knowledge of God” was lost-and this is exactly the knowledge that Jesus came to restore, when the time was ripe, and as we’re ready, in order to reconcile man with God. We’ll never be genuinely reconciled so long as God is a deity strictly to be feared or held in suspicion.

So Jesus reveals the full true face of the Father, His nature being best described perhaps in 1 Cor 13:4-13. That’s the true nature of God. God first of all exists. And He’s wholly deserving of our trust, something Adam hadn’t yet recognized in Eden. He’s infinitely wise, gentle, patient, merciful, forgiving, and even humble, amazingly. God is love; enmity and division never came from Him but rather from man. As we come to understand this, with the help of grace, we come to realize something of just how good God is, and as we develop a hunger and thirst for righteousness in an often loveless and wrong and evil world, we develop a hunger and thirst for Him, the highest Good. We find that God has always had man’s best interest at heart.

This revelation of who God really is can take time to receive; it’s a process involving growth. But visionaries who’ve been given direct glimpses of it cannot describe or convey the depth or profundity in human words and concepts. It might be impossible to keep standing in the “mere” presence of this Goodness. Peace, joy, happiness, the sense of total and absolute acceptance and well-being are experienced automatically. But the main point is to not take for granted that our initial and very common human feelings towards God are correct. No matter how good our teachers may be, no matter how well they may know God (and not all do know Him so well), until we, ourselves, experience this in some manner or another we tend to default to seeing God as more or less aloof in His superiority, not particularly loving at all, kind of the way humans play God when we mistreat other people by abusing our power.
 
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Hello.

This is a struggle with me as well. What helps me is to tell God about it and go to Confession with it.

Some examples:

When I was a kiddo I lost a signed, blank check, ready to have the amount written in it then cashed. I was so tired at the time I couldn’t handle it and sure wasn’t ready to tell my parents. I went to bed. A neighbor found it blowing in the wind a few blocks away and brought it to our house.

When I was older I wanted to move out of the house. I was told that I couldn’t make it on my own and was discouraged from this. I moved out, I lost my job, I did NOT want to come back home. Found another job in 3 weeks. Didn’t have to move back home, ever.

This past September my husband lost his job. I figured we’d have to move out of the house and again, be doomed. My husband is now doing consulting work and slowly, companies are starting to take an interest in him.

These are some examples. God hasn’t given me what I wanted all the time, but we’ve always been taken care of. One of my favorite prayers is “Be careful what you wish for, you might get it.”

Another example: I have depression. I can see a dead animal in the road, have someone look funny at me, and boom, I’m in the pits. Sometimes I’m in those pits and I can’t find a reason. It’s a terrible feeling, of life being nothing, of nothing mattering, it’s all nothing. Anyway, during one of these episodes, when I felt like all of humanity had no redeeming qualities, I was at a traffic light and someone had a car wreck. Several people parked their cars and rushed to help. I started to cry.

Thank you for this topic. It’s one I struggle with too. Maybe it would help to write down any time you have an experience that indicates God is taking care of you so you can refer to it in times of doubt. Just an idea.
 
Thank you for responding. I’m sorry you struggle with this as well. I guess I’ve never seen my life as God taking care of me. I know that sounds horrible and I truly am sorry but it’s honesty. Ignoring the subject has gotten me nowhere so far and I refuse to do it anymore.

There have been many things recently that have gone “wrong” in my life from a worldly viewpoint and maybe I am letting my emotions get the best of me. My faith has been deteriorating much longer, however, and out of everything that’s the one thing I miss the most. I’ve always craved a good relationship with God and I can’t even explain why because religion has played such a small part in the majority of my life, but I do hope I don’t let Him down too much in what I have left of this life.
 
A strong suggestion is to draw close to the Virgin Mary. She will lead you on a fast track to her Son. I don’t see any indication that you are doing so, and this is simply a time-tested route to greater love of God. Do you say the Rosary? I’d suggest doing it everyday (as Mary has asked) and see where you are in a month’s time or so. But keep going, because we are never “done” with growing in love of God and neighbor. Of course you also need to stay very close to the sacraments–daily Mass if possible, frequent confession.
 
Maybe if you told Him you loved Him so much He wants something from you. Try this prayer by St. Theresa of Avila “In the Hands of God”:
I am Yours and born of You,
What do You want of me?
Majestic Sovereign,
Unending wisdom,
Kindness pleasing to my soul;
God sublime, one Being Good,
Behold this one so vile.
Singing of her love to you:
What do You want of me?

Yours, You made me,
Yours, you saved me,
Yours, you called me,
Yours, you awaited me,
Yours, I did not stray.
What do you want of me?

Good Lord, what do you want of me?
What is this wretch to do?
What work is this,
This sinful slave, to do?
Look at me, Sweet Love,
Sweet Love, look at me,
What do you want of me?

In Your hand
I place my heart,
Body, life and soul,
Deep feelings and affections mine,
Spouse – Redeemer sweet,
Myself offered now to you,
What do you want of me?

Give me death, give me life,
Health or sickness,
Honor or shame,
War or swelling peace,
Weakness or full strength,
Yes, to these I say,
What do you want of me?

Give me wealth or want,
Happiness or gloominess,
Heaven or hell,
Sweet life, sun unveiled,
To you I give all.
What do you want of me?

Give me, if You will, prayer;
Or let me know dryness,
And abundance of devotion,
or if not, then barrenness.
In you alone, Sovereign Majesty,
I find my peace,
What do You want of me?

Give me then wisdom,
Or for love, ignorance,
Years of abundance,
or hunger and famine.
Darkness or sunlight,
Move me here or there:
What do You want of me?

If You want me to rest,
I desire it for love;
If to labor,
I will die working:
Sweet Love say
Where, how and when.
What do You want of me?

Calvary or Tabor give me,
Desert or fruitful land;
As Job in suffering
Or John at Your breast;
Barren or fruited vine,
Whatever be Your will:
What do You want of me?

Be I Joseph Chained
Or as Egypt’s governor,
David pained
Or exalted high,
Jonas drowned,
Or Jonas freed:
What do You want of me?

Silent or speaking,
Fruitbearing or barren,
My wounds shown by the Law,
Rejoicing in the tender Gospel;
Sorrowing or exulting,
You alone live in me:
What do you want of me?

Yours I am, for You I was born:
Yours I am, for You I was born:

What do You want of me?
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