Giving during sex abuse scandal

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40cal

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I believe that Catholics are required to give as able to their parish because I believe it is one of the precepts of the Church. I have stopped giving to anything Catholic because of the new sex abuse allegations in Philadelphia and New York in order to purge these sins from the Church that I love so very much. I realize that by not obeying the precepts of the Church that I could be in grave sin. Every night I ask Lord Jesus to have mercy on my soul. Am I doing the right thing? It seems like the only way the leaders of our Church will do the right thing is if it affects their budgets.
 
It’s your individual conscience. I chose to continue giving as I see no point in penalizing my local overworked pastor over what some bishop did 2 decades ago. Others are free to make their own choice.

I actally feel called upon lately to give more to try to make up for the people who for whatever reason decided to stop.
 
When you withhold from Sunday collections, you make it harder for your local parish to pay the light bill or for maintenance to the building so, could you maybe volunteer to do the maintenance work yourself, clean the bathroom, clean the Church and the classrooms, mow the grass?

When the parish cannot pay their staff, will you help those staffers pay their rent and buy groceries (in many states there is no unemployment insurance for non-profit employees), help them find new jobs? Will you go into the office and learn all of the rules so you can help people with their Sacramental records so they can get married or confirmed? Will you make sure that those who do give have their donations recorded correctly so they can get a proper statement at the end of the year? Schedule the Altar Servers and Lectors?

Will you teach at the Catholic School when they have to lay off teachers? Be the ‘lunch lady’?

Will you put gas in the car so a priest can go give last rites to a dying person at 3 AM?

Fill in all of the help for the poor that your parish does?

Your donations help your parish and your community.
 
Failing to give money to the Church is not a sin, grave or otherwise. Yes, we should support our local parish, and I agree that trying to punish the local pastor (or, rather, the people he would’ve helped if he had had the money) doesn’t do anything to correct the mistakes of the past (especially the ones made at the diosecesan level); but that’s a question of tactics, not sin.
 
I’d like to echo that not giving to your Parish may not be advisable. But as others have said, it is a matter of prudence and conscience. If your Parish has a lot of good ministries, withholding money from them may have an adverse affect. I have also read an opinion that held that the Bishops are positioned financially to weather these kinds of dips in Diocesan funding from the Parish level.
I’m not saying don’t withhold money, I’m just saying that it may cause issues with something you might care about.
 
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TheLittleLady said:
When you withhold from Sunday collections, you make it harder for your local parish to pay the light bill or for maintenance to the building so, could you maybe volunteer to do the maintenance work yourself, clean the bathroom, clean the Church and the classrooms, mow the grass?

When the parish cannot pay their staff, will you help those staffers pay their rent and buy groceries (in many states there is no unemployment insurance for non-profit employees), help them find new jobs? Will you go into the office and learn all of the rules so you can help people with their Sacramental records so they can get married or confirmed? Will you make sure that those who do give have their donations recorded correctly so they can get a proper statement at the end of the year? Schedule the Altar Servers and Lectors?

Will you teach at the Catholic School when they have to lay off teachers? Be the ‘lunch lady’?

Will you put gas in the car so a priest can go give last rites to a dying person at 3 AM?

Fill in all of the help for the poor that your parish does?

Your donations help your parish and your community.
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Thank you!
 
I’ve increased the amount of money I give. I don’t have a lot by American standards, but I know that every single thing in my life is a gift from God, so I will freely give my time and talent and money.
 
It just seems like unless we physically starve priests that leaders will keep moving predators around and not reporting them to authorities. I know that sounds harsh but that’s how I feel. I will not even give to Catholic charities because charity funds were used to pay for a victim’s kids college to keep him quiet and it was listed as tuition assistance. I am planning on giving to Protestant charities if you guys don’t change my mind. I am willing to drive a significant distance to get to mass or confession if parishes in my suburb are closed. I love my Church but enough is enough.
 
40cal said:
It just seems like unless we physically starve priests that leaders will keep moving predators around and not reporting them to authorities.
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When, since the Dallas accords of 2002 by the USCCB, have bishops moved around abusive priests and failed to report them to authorities? I think in the past 16 years in the U.S. there have been six cases of reported abuse. In my diocese, an incident was reported recently that was over 50 years old. The priest in question was removed in one day by the local bishop. That is what is happening in the U.S. today.

Penalizing the church of today for the sins of 30, 40, 50 years ago is not only unjust, but, and I’m sorry if this offends, but stupid.

Rethink your position, please.
 
I didn’t notice the part of the country you are from but if you have a “good” Bishop you would also be punishing him. I am in the Northeast and Parish closings are becoming more frequent and sometimes “political”. If you find your Bishop lacking, they can and do use giving statistics when considering closure. If the Parish you frequent is one that you value and you have a good priest, you may also be inviting hardship on them too.

There are other ways to protest and make your righteous anger known.
 
40cal said:
I have stopped giving to anything Catholic because of the new sex abuse allegations in Philadelphia and New York in order to purge these sins from the Church that I love so very much.
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If you don’t live in NY or Phili failing to give where you do live isn’t doing what you say you intend to do. Not sure how withholding support for your parish, orphans, flood victims, homeless people, etc. makes any sort of stand against sexual abuse.
40cal said:
Am I doing the right thing?
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In my opinion, no.
 
If you people can attest that moving predators around is no longer occurring and any new allegations are always reported to police then I will change my mind. It would feel really good to start giving again. I am in the diocese of Phoenix. I brought my question to this forum rather than asking a priest during confession because I didn’t think that would have been fair to the priest. I really appreciate all of your responses.
 
I understand “voting with your pocketbook” in many cases - that works with businesses when well-organized, and it may work with certain nonprofits, too (but rarely does an individual effort have any impact).

However, I have NEVER understood this notion so many have about “I want you to fix a problem, so I’m going to withhold the resources I have and you need in order to do so” that this post (and so many others on social media I’ve seen) describe. It’s mind-boggling to me.
40cal said:
It just seems like unless we physically starve priests that leaders
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Ah, yes… just like that verse where Jesus tells us to harm the innocent as retaliation against the wicked. Where was that verse? searches in vain…
40cal said:
I am planning on giving to Protestant charities if you guys don’t change my mind.
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An ultimatum to this forum will do nothing for you. That simply makes no sense.
40cal said:
I am willing to drive a significant distance to get to mass or confession if parishes in my suburb are closed. I love my Church but enough is enough.
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Let me rephrase this for you in a way that makes more sense: “I’m willing to cut off my nose to spite my face. I say one thing, but I really mean another.”
40cal said:
If you people
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Not our job - nor within our capacity. Again, your emotions betray logic.
40cal said:
I brought my question to this forum rather than asking a priest … because I didn’t think that would have been fair to the priest.
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Again, you didn’t quite get the wording right; try: “I’m asking people with no direct connection to the situation to influence something or prove something in ways they can’t because I know it will somehow justify my intentions that I’m not willing to admit are faulty. I didn’t ask a priest because I wouldn’t want to have to trust his response or feel guilty when it wasn’t the answer I wanted to hear.”

So, now that I understand you, I’m afraid I must confess, no one can help you until you decide to stop being your own obstacle.
 
40cal said:
If you people can attest that moving predators around is no longer occurring and any new allegations are always reported to police then I will change my mind.
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Read the charter for the protection of young people. Read the procedures for your own diocese. Ours are on our website.

I am the safe environment coordinator for my parish. I do annual training for CCD teachers and families. I attend annual training at the diocese. This is taken very seriously.

Here is your diocese:

 
40cal said:
I am planning on giving to Protestant charities if you guys don’t change my mind.
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This is your choice and if a Protestant charity is truly helping people then why would we tell you not to give?

I honestly have no reason or motivation to convince you what to do with your own money. Your attitude alone is not giving out of a sense of love and stewardship, so maybe it would be better if you kept your money until your attitude changed. The Catholic Church is not in the business of trying to convince you to donate, or do what you want in order to get your money. I guarantee there are many people in the churches I attend every week who never contribute a dime and are still welcome at Mass.

Also, in the example you mention, a kid’s college got funded. How is this bad? The victim had a choice to turn down the settlement.
 
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You’re not changing anything by not giving. But if your inner self is so angry at the Church right now that you don’t feel like even being part of her any more , if you need to vent off by giving your money some place else then I would say do it and take your donations elsewhere. When I was mad at my own EO church I felt like throwing money at them in full despise. Instead I donated to an English Catholic parish under the patronage of Mary Magdalene. The CC is my place to go whenever I get mad at my own church. The Lord will judge me as He sees fits as He does to all of us judge and get mad. I can’t lie to Him. And sometimes I can’t get help from being mad. “Indiference is death” said someone. So your anger is not all bad I think. But don’t close all doors on your church. Get mad with an open door. And be open to …the missing and longing feeling.
 
The Church is being attacked at the moment it shouldn’t be weakened financially.
 
There are doctors who have abused people. I’m going to stop paying my own doctor in protesrt even though I need his medical help.
 
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1Ke gave a link to my diocese. This link gave me information indicating that my diocese has had outside independent investigators each year over the last 16 years. Nothing bad has been found over that time period. Also, there is a law enforcement member of a professional lay committee who weighs allegations against clergy. The diocese website also encourages victims to report to police. This has been extremely helpful and I have decided to start my giving again to the Catholic Church that I love so much. Thanks to all of you who have posted respectful comments.
 
We are required to support the material needs of the church according to our ability. Failing to give money to the church is grave matter. It most certainly can be sin.
 
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