Going to hell

[RoseMary131]

I’m sorry. I misinterpreted your meaning in your last post. I had heard and read that letting one’s mind go blank is a kind of stuff they do in Eastern religions and the New Age movement. And that it can open the mind up to all sorts of demons and other nasty stuff.

Sorry about the confusion. I often don’t express myself well. I “keep” in my head what I think I have said. I should have explained what I meant by letting your mind go blank.

Like in the … Missionaries of Charity and Lay M.C. Prayer Book

PRAYER BEFORE MEDITATION

O my Divine Master, teach me to hold myself in silence before you; to adore you
in the depth of my being; to wait upon you always

“Hold myself in silence” to me means to silence my mind (“go blank”). This is very hard for me as my mind is always running. Trying to let my mind be “blank”, quit thinking about my plans for the day or week, quit trying to solve all my problems, is hard for me.

 

[LegoGE1947]

That’s a problem I have. If I let my mind “go blank” it fills up very quickly.

I hate mowing the lawn, raking leaves, walking the dog, etc. because when I’m alone like that and have nothing to occupy my mind I start to think. And when I start to think, I start to dwell on things. And when I dwell on things, I get depressed.

Let me see, I’ve heard of Roman Catholics, Maronite Catholics, Ruthenian Catholics, Coptic Catholics, Byzantine Catholics but “Cynical Catholics” is a new one on me.

 

[Lost_Sheep]

Let me see, I’ve heard of Roman Catholics, Maronite Catholics, Ruthenian Catholics, Coptic Catholics, Byzantine Catholics but “Cynical Catholics” is a new one on me.

It is a small, but growing sect.

 

[RoseMary131]

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That’s a problem I have. If I let my mind “go blank” it fills up very quickly.

I hate mowing the lawn, raking leaves, walking the dog, etc. because when I’m alone like that and have nothing to occupy my mind I start to think. And when I start to think, I start to dwell on things. And when I dwell on things, I get depressed.

My mind is always filled up. I have a hard time letting my mind “go blank” or silencing all the “ideas and planning”. For prayer purposes I need to be silent in my mind. Otherwise I am “planning” and “thinking” and not taking the time to listen to God, to be silent in His presence. We need to let go of these distractions in our minds during prayer.

I find taking my daily walk or doing outdoor things refreshing. That’s when I can think without the distractions of my “work” or conversation with others.

I enjoy the bonus of being outside and of the benefits to my body with the exercising.

When I think during this time, I feel it is my “free time”. In fact, its more than my free time because I am already “doing” what I am “suppose” to be doing - walking for “exercising” or taking care of my outdoor “chores”.

Can you think without being depressed during your yardwork and walk with the dog?

Try to think with productive results - if you begin to dwell on a “problem”, let this dwelling time not be a time to be “depressed” about the topic, but a time to be pro-active about the topic.

Identify what makes you depressed about the topic and make a plan to change it.

Of course, we can not always totally change the thing that depresses us, but we can make some plans about it. We can even let it be a time to “let out” what makes us depressed, to heal our souls of the pains.

Lets say I am walking and thinking about how I miss someone who moved away and it makes me sad. What can I do to improve this? I think about the fun adventures together. I think about ways to stay close to this person. Maybe I make a plan to call and what I want to say. I might even cry while I walk because its a natural part of emotions.

If the thinking or dwelling is just to “dwell” on the bad, the sorrow, the negative things and to do nothing about it except think “worse” and “worse” scenarios, then naturally depression or sadness results and we feel even worse.

That’s where you have to force yourself to rethink what you are thinking about. …Think of your walking the dog time as a “committee meeting”. Imagine a board where you list what is the problem, AND what are all the possible solutions going to be, just like if your were at a committee meeting.

You can’t make all the topics that bother you go away…like problems at work, what if you loose your job, how will you take care of you and your wife when you are older. You become productive, think of your plans if this job is ever gone or your plans for managing your lives during old age.

We all have to have back up plans for future employment and for old age. Don’t “dwell” in a negative way…think and plan.

Earlier you said, the political and social environment of our life today depresses you. During your thinking, ponder what can you do about the situation. It might be that you feel you can not do anything, then how will you handle it so it does not make you depressed.

Its much easier for me to say because I am not suffering from clinical depression. When I use the word depressed it is more like a “deep sadness”. Clinical depression is actually biological. Both types need help from within ourselves. Expressing sadness instead of depressing it is also important.

With clinical depression, you need a professional helping you keep it under control, the same as if it was high blood pressure. Foods we eat (wheat, gluten, white sugars, etc.) can contribute to the depression. Poor sleep habits can also contribute to depression- self help books and professionals can help with this as well.

I’m sorry you suffer from clinical depression. I hope your time walking the dog and doing yard work can become a positive time.

 

[LegoGE1947]

It is a small, but growing sect.

I pray that it stop growing.

 

[fred_conty]

LegoGE,
I’m sorry I haven’t responded to you sooner, but I was out of town for a while.

The one thing you mentioned is that your childhood left you in the cold, without knowing a caring and loving home life. And that love leaves you without meaning in your lack of experience with it.

But there is a way thru this.

There are two kinds of love, emotional and intellectual. Emotional is demonstrated by a family which hugs, kisses, and says “I love you”. It is a warm gussy feeling towards another person, and it is quite nice when experienced.

There is another kind of love performed by the intellect. The person wants to see to it that the other person prospers and is ok. It is a protective love, and it also takes action, that is, doing what the other person needs done. The mind sees it as object of its’ attention, tho the emotional gussy love is missing.

Jesus told a story about two sons of a man who owned a vineyard. He asked both his sons to be there early in the morning to help him. One son said “yes” and the other said “no”. But the next day the one who said “yes” wasn’t there, and the other who said “no” was there. Jesus asked which son was the real son?

Jesus was making a distinction about emotional and intellectual love. The one that counts is the intellectual love.

It is easier if we have both, but Jesus said it is not necessary to have both, but very important to have the right one.

Many of the saints suffered from no emotion. Mother Teresa suffered from the same thing. But they showed up at the vineyard.

I know that this is a difficult time in your life. Just start with one step. For one step leads to many more which leads to the vineyard.

Be at peace for his wish is “my peace I give to you my, peace I leave with you”.

 

[RoseMary131]

LegoGE,
There is another kind of love performed by the intellect. The person wants to see to it that the other person prospers and is ok. It is a protective love, and it also takes action, that is, doing what the other person needs done. The mind sees it as object of its’ attention, tho the emotional gussy love is missing.

Jesus was making a distinction about emotional and intellectual love. The one that counts is the intellectual love.

Many of the saints suffered from no emotion. Mother Teresa suffered from the same thing. But they showed up at the vineyard.

Be at peace for his wish is “my peace I give to you my, peace I leave with you”.

Very powerful, Fred! Thank you for sharing. I know your message was to Lego, but I enjoyed it as well.

 

[LegoGE1947]

LegoGE,
I’m sorry I haven’t responded to you sooner, but I was out of town for a while.

The one thing you mentioned is that your childhood left you in the cold, without knowing a caring and loving home life. And that love leaves you without meaning in your lack of experience with it.

But there is a way thru this.

There are two kinds of love, emotional and intellectual. Emotional is demonstrated by a family which hugs, kisses, and says “I love you”. It is a warm gussy feeling towards another person, and it is quite nice when experienced.

There is another kind of love performed by the intellect. The person wants to see to it that the other person prospers and is ok. It is a protective love, and it also takes action, that is, doing what the other person needs done. The mind sees it as object of its’ attention, tho the emotional gussy love is missing.

Jesus told a story about two sons of a man who owned a vineyard. He asked both his sons to be there early in the morning to help him. One son said “yes” and the other said “no”. But the next day the one who said “yes” wasn’t there, and the other who said “no” was there. Jesus asked which son was the real son?

Jesus was making a distinction about emotional and intellectual love. The one that counts is the intellectual love.

It is easier if we have both, but Jesus said it is not necessary to have both, but very important to have the right one.

Many of the saints suffered from no emotion. Mother Teresa suffered from the same thing. But they showed up at the vineyard.

I know that this is a difficult time in your life. Just start with one step. For one step leads to many more which leads to the vineyard.

Be at peace for his wish is “my peace I give to you my, peace I leave with you”.

I might be losing my mind after an auto accident in October, 2012 but I don’t remember the message that would have influenced you to respond with the above message.

 

[fred_conty]

LogoGE,

Your response of #25, that it was difficult because of your childhood to have love and trust.
At least that is what I saw in your post, lack of love. And when someone mentions love to you, it is beyond your understanding. And so, Jesus tells us what love really is, which is what I was addressing. I can see where this might be confusing to you now that I look back.

 

[Methos]

I’m sorry I haven’t responded as I’ve been ill. I basically shutdown, sleeping 12-16 hours, waking only to eat, drink and take care of other needs.

You suffered as a child from an abusive parents with an alcoholic father. The pain didn’t stop just because the abuse stopped. This still affects you. I’m sure you already have read much on the topic. When you think about this being part of the cause of your depression pain, it is good to know someone can help you.

aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/children_of_alcoholics

al-anon.alateen.org/is-alanon-for-you

You have been diagnosed with dysthymia and schizoid personality disorder, but you do not have to settle for not getting out of couseling what you needed or for drugs “can not help you”. Search and search until you find the professionals who work best with you. This area is where you need professionals. They will not make it all go away, but they can help you to heal, to be at a better level against the depression.

You mention social skills. There are a variety of therapies that can help. Many people deal with issues related to social skills. Sometimes people are taught poor social skills, but often its because of a problem that they suffer like autism spectrum disorders: autism, aspergers, pdd-nos or those with tics and ocd. With therapy and self-help those who suffer issues with social skills can retrain themselves to be more conforming.

You express that you want different social skills.

Look for help with behavior therapy or social skills, maybe even through occupational therapy. Don’t stop looking until you find the help you need to not feel your social skills drag you down.

I posted about the difficulties of getting help in this post. When I’m in public or on the computer, the persona I have is vastly different than when I am alone. One could almost say I was acting. In fact, only two people have noticed it. One was in fact an actor and the other was an associate who could con you into anything, So, finding help, if I could find one and afford it, is just the first step. Next, it would have to a therapist or whatever who knew how only deal with my problems, but deal with me. I can be very confrontational to where many of my sessions were just back and forth. Also, not many therapists have encountered my problems. Depression, yes, as it’s common, but not dysthymia (the other name for dysthymic disorder) and schizoid personality disorder. My knowledge of them at times exceeded theirs . So, I’d need to find someone I could afford, someone with knowledge and experience, someone I can trust, someone who can basically rebuild a person as my life has been shaped 20+ years by this. I don’t think an hour a week is going to help.

You look for pleasure in food and Pepsi. Its not healthy to find our pleasure in eating. Even though you may not be over-weight, look to a support group like Weight Watchers. Emotional eating is not good for you.

But it’s one of the few pleasures I have. Being denied the ability to feel happiness, regardless of the circumstances, I don’t think WW is capable of dealing with it.

Over consumption of soda has more problems than just diabetes. Diabetes is serious. The other problems with soda can make your pains even worse. Withdrawing yourself from the consumption of soda can be hard. You can find advice on how to do so and support from groups like WW. Sodas (or any product) sweetened with High Fructose Corn Syrup can be even worse for your body. Diet products sweetened with aspartame bring more problems.

Hence, why I drink Pepsi Throwback, which is made with sugar. I’m allergic to aspartame. I have a high tolerance of caffeine to where I fell asleep after drinking an energy drink and tea that makes some people hearts racing has no effect on me. Also, my bones are healthy do to my large milk consumption. Unfortunately, my body is pretty resilient. I’m mean unfortunate in that it will likely lead to a long life, which I really, really really don’t want. 90+ years is not unusual in my family.

Wheat and/ or Gluten are other substances associated with health problems including depression. You don’t have to have celiac disease to find improvements with a gluten free or wheat free diet. Maybe the book *Wheat Belly *or the blog would be helpful. (Gluten is a protein in wheat, barley, and rye. A gluten-free diet includes being wheat-free. A wheat-free diet does not mean gluten-free, as gluten is in other grains.)

Wheat and barley taste sweet to me, so I enjoy them. Malted milk is my favorite drink next to Pepsi. Hence, one of the few pleasures I have. Also, I’m lucky to afford the current $1 wheat bread, whereas gluten free is $7.

Depression comes into our life so many ways: like water leaking through the roof, under the door, from an overflowing toilet, and because we left the window open. We need to stop the water at all its entries. I want you to control your depression in all the areas were it infiltrates your life.

Perhaps it would be better to condemn the house and raze it to the ground.

I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the Twilight Zone episode “Shatterday” with Bruce Willis. As in that episode, it seems anyone else in my place would be able fix my problems and fix it better than I ever could.
.

 

[LegoGE1947]

LogoGE,

Your response of #25, that it was difficult because of your childhood to have love and trust.
At least that is what I saw in your post, lack of love. And when someone mentions love to you, it is beyond your understanding. And so, Jesus tells us what love really is, which is what I was addressing. I can see where this might be confusing to you now that I look back.

One of the first memories I have of trusting someone and being crushed was my folks had a newspaper delivery boy who was several years older than I was. I had a toy tractor that was broken. One afternoon the paper-boy saw me playing with the broken toy and said he would take it to his house and fix it for me and then bring it back. That has been 55 years ago and I never saw my toy since. When I was in the 4th grade this same paper-boy, who was in high-school came to my class and gave a puppet show. He had one puppet that was a “dog” I was very afraid of dogs and he knew it… He brought the dog puppet around to each individual child in the class and when he got to me he encouraged me to “shake hands” with the dog. I hesitated out of fear but he said “go ahead, he won’t bite!” When I finally went ahead he, made the puppet lunge at me as if to bite me which every one thought was funny except for me. Years later when I joined the Navy I met a fellow who convinced me to lend hin $20.00 for a “few days” Several weeks went by and I didn’t see him around, when someone said that “so-and-so” had gone Absent without Leave" and was in the brig. I could mention several other incidents where I dared to trust someone and they failed to fulfill their promises. I’ve had a great deal of trouble trusting God, whom I cannot see, I don’t know if I have ever had an answer to one of my own personal prayers. It’s as if I’m bothering God by saying anything and so no answer. Yet I read all these “promises” the bible and other religious books on the subject of faith and I get frustrated wondering if God answers prayers for others, why not for ME?

 

[Sirach2]

This nugget of deep wisdom comes from the book The Little Flowers of St. Francis.

feastofsaints.com/perfectjoy.htm

Dorothy, how timely your message was, sent no doubt by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit. I had been insulted, reviled, and taken over some coals this week, but thanks be to God’s grace, I did not retaliate. It was more important to me that I give glory to God as befits his servants.

Indeed, it bothered me somewhat as I tried to deflect the thoughts of the person’s cruelty. But suddenly, a piercing joy flashed inwardly and I realized that God was pleased. “Who, when he was reviled, did not revile.”

Thank you!

 

[Sirach2]

I could mention several other incidents where I dared to trust someone and they failed to fulfill their promises. I’ve had a great deal of trouble trusting God, whom I cannot see, I don’t know if I have ever had an answer to one of my own personal prayers. It’s as if I’m bothering God by saying anything and so no answer. Yet I read all these “promises” the bible and other religious books on the subject of faith and I get frustrated wondering if God answers prayers for others, why not for ME?

Your post brought back some vivid and painful memories of my childhood school days, too, Lego. The cruelty of others is so entrenched in our memories sometimes that we have difficulty rising above it. :console: I hurt for you when I read your post, knowing that these injustices still go on and God’s children are treated as the world’s refuse.

If my prayer has any bit of strength, I send you assurance that you are so deeply loved by God, and what others do to YOU, they do to HIM who lives within you. He feels your pain. Let it all out in prayer and trust him to guide you.

[sign]Go in God’s wonderful peace![/sign]

 

[RoseMary131]

I’m sorry I haven’t responded as I’ve been ill. I basically shutdown, sleeping 12-16 hours, waking only to eat, drink and take care of other needs.

I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the Twilight Zone episode “Shatterday” with Bruce Willis. As in that episode, it seems anyone else in my place would be able fix my problems and fix it better than I ever could.
.

I am sorry to hear you have been ill and felt a need to shutdown so much. I would like to be able to help you in your darkness and pain.

+++ May God give you hope to be able to continue on your search for your health in mind and body and the strength to put aside any blocks within your own control. Amen +++

 

[LegoGE1947]

Your post brought back some vivid and painful memories of my childhood school days, too, Lego. The cruelty of others is so entrenched in our memories sometimes that we have difficulty rising above it. :console: I hurt for you when I read your post, knowing that these injustices still go on and God’s children are treated as the world’s refuse.

If my prayer has any bit of strength, I send you assurance that you are so deeply loved by God, and what others do to YOU, they do to HIM who lives within you. He feels your pain. Let it all out in prayer and trust him to guide you.

[sign]Go in God’s wonderful peace![/sign]

I heard a quote that someone made on an EWTN program “If Jesus could forgive so many, why can’t I forgive so few?” So I forgive all those who have hurt or bullied me and God will have to deal with them because I can’t!

 

[Lost_Sheep]

I heard a quote that someone made on an EWTN program “If Jesus could forgive so many, why can’t I forgive so few?” So I forgive all those who have hurt or bullied me and God will have to deal with them because I can’t!

Because Jesus does not have a personal stake in it. No one beat him up on the school playground. No one cut him off in traffic. No one backstabbed him in the office to get a promotion. No one ever stole his property. It is easy to tell someone to forgive when they are not the one wronged.

(And before you try to equate the crucifixion with the school playground, I’m speaking metaphorically here).

 

[LegoGE1947]

Because Jesus does not have a personal stake in it. No one beat him up on the school playground. No one cut him off in traffic. No one backstabbed him in the office to get a promotion. No one ever stole his property. It is easy to tell someone to forgive when they are not the one wronged.

(And before you try to equate the crucifixion with the school playground, I’m speaking metaphorically here).

Peace

 

[ThunderFox]

Well we should be honest with ourselves. Hell is there, wither we deny it or not(Romans 1:18-32, John 12:40), Most people Go to hell(Matthew 7:13, Luke 13:24). What do we do to avoid hell?
We have to strive and deny ourselves and do everything possible to not to sin.

Lately i have been having nightmares of hell, but i am guessing these are messages from God that i have to take more action.

What scares me the most is the lake of fire and the fact that the unsaved are burning in the presence of the Lord and the holy angels himself(Revelation 14:11).

Thankfully we have the annonting of the sick which will forgive our sins should we have a deathbed repentance.

PS: I listed John 12:40 in a reference to athiests. Because God has hardened the hearts of the athiest

 

[BluesPicker]

A lot of people on this forum, and a lot of people of faith in general make me really nervous, and I constantly feel like i’m going straight to hell.

I have faith, and my faith is ingrained in the belief that there is one God and a true God that has done wonders for me in my life. Happens to be that, by growing up in the catholic home, I discovered the God of Isaac, Jacob and David, and I felt an instant connection that, when I pray today, it’s to that God that I pray. I pray, and I pray even more to Mary, because of the mother figure I feel from her. My faith and belief, I feel, sometimes strengthen me a lot. I’ve never been the luckiest of fellas in life, but every single time, I find God’s blessings upon me somehow.

However my faith isn’t enough on its own, so I recently decided to read more the bible and inspire myself more with the word. I also felt like I need also to get inspired through teachings, and doctrines of my church and there lies my main issue.

I feel like I’m part of those that aren’t worth being called christian or believer, I feel like i’m the worst of the human beings there is on the planet, and for few reasons, the first is I read a thread on sex before marriage, I was in a relationship for 5 years, the third year I had sex with the girl that I dated. I very much tried throughout my life to conform to word of God, my dad would really teach and talk to me for hours about abstinence before marriage, I was weak and through this same weakness, I got exposed to porn and masturbation, because my body and my mind couldn’t deal well with being active sexually, but most importantly I feel I was in love, and thought it would never end. I can’t justify it and don’t want to, but my very problem is this, why do people of faith usually make others feel like they aren’t worth a penny. I hear beautiful words coming from people near perfect. I read, from a guy, i’m 27, i waited. I read from a woman, marriages where people where already active sexually fails, with stats to justify it, and in my mind I go here we go again. Some of it, is anger at myself for not being able to withstand my weakness, but some of it also toward people that teach oh so perfect.

God knows my heart and God knows for every prayer, it goes out to him and in sincerity. God also knows my character, I’m not perfect. I try my best to live by the GOOD, because I believe in the GOOD. why isn’t this enough on its own. I’m not seeking my neighbors detriment. i’m not forging untrue stories about anything to anyone. When it so happens I cross those lines, I pray to God for my forgiveness, and I try never to repeat it. Why isn’t this a good enough base for catholicism??

And then I also feel very deranged at this by this phenomena. I read the Qu’ran in the past to find this answer, I engaged men of faith and I never get an adequate answer for this question?? If I was born of a different faith, or atheism, but in my life path, i at least went only on doing good, and being good and faithful to others, without attending church every sunday or know about abstinence, but still was thought enough morality, decency etc… why can’t I feel accepted among those of any faith. We say the non believers, the Muslims say the infidels. why so discriminatory for faiths that in someway or the other claim they preach unity tolerance and acceptance. Why those condemning eyes.

Why that picture that faith, or being of faith is so unattainable.

Remeber you are God’s child. If you have confessed your wrong doings, repented and have done your penance your Soul is wiped clean.

   I remember a Cardinal wrote about a woman who persisted in meeting him who claimed she had been seeing and speaking with the Blessed Mother.  This Cardinal was also the Archbishop of a diocese that is something like 98% or so Catholic.  Finally he said to himself if I don't see this poor woman (he felt she had mental problems) she will not stop trying to get a conference with me. Then all I have to do is ask her a tough question that only the Holy Mother would know the answer.  So he instructed his secretary  to make an appointment with this woman when she calls again.

  So, the woman called and an appointment was made.  The woman came and he listened to her but still was convinced she was just a mental case or looking for attention.

So, he asked the woman to ask the Blessed Mother to ask her Son, Jesus Christ, about a very private sin he had committed long ago. He was positive that she would never guess that sin.

  Much to his surprise the woman came to his office and he received her.  He said to himself that surely this will be the last time. So the woman walked into his office and he asked her about his old sin.  The woman replied that the Blessed Mother asked her Son and  Christ said that the sin was forgotten because the good Cardinal had gone to Confession.   Surprised he began to ask and tested this religious seer.  He is now convinced the woman was seeing the Blessed Mother.

God forgives us our sins if we go to Confession. Do that and continue onward with Christ.  Do worry about what people say of you.  Worry about what Jesus Christ would say.  Only God truly knows the state of grace your Soul is in.

 

[wcknight]

Because Jesus does not have a personal stake in it. No one beat him up on the school playground. No one cut him off in traffic. No one backstabbed him in the office to get a promotion. No one ever stole his property. It is easy to tell someone to forgive when they are not the one wronged.

(And before you try to equate the crucifixion with the school playground, I’m speaking metaphorically here).

The thing is, Jesus was betrayed, back stabbed by his own people and by all sinners, by Judas and abandoned by His apostles and disciples.

If anyone has suffered He did, and far worse than any office squabble or traffic incident.

Life is suffering, the road to Heaven is narrow and filled with thorns and troubles. The road to hell is wide and smooth, easy to travel.

If you want to trade your pains and sufferings with those that Jesus endured, I’m sure He will oblige you in a heartbeat.

I’ve been through every pain that you’ve mentioned many times over and it is nothing compared to what our Lord went through.