Grief, seperation, & trust-Long:(

[battyz1]

This sounds so similar to my husband. We have a wonderful month or two really enjoying each other’s company and then bam! I fail him in some small misdemeanor and the world comes crashing down. He yells and screams and swears at me, smashes things, makes my two year old cry and then - silence. For days. The last episode lasted almost a week. Then when he finally comes around to talking it’s another sreaming match where he makes it all my fault he acted like that and then he thinks all is forgiven and we can go back to normal. Needless to say it has an adverse effect on our intimacy, I don’t trust him nor feel very attracted to him anymore. I have been so close to walking out so often. But I cling to hope. I really want to get him help or he will end up a lonely old man and I a single mother which I really don’t want, but he refuses to admit he has done anything wrong! What can I do?

 

[Liberanosamalo]

escapeabuse.com/npd.pdf

Educate yourself as to what you are really dealing with.

Stop worrying about him 40 years from now and worry about your child who is witnessing her daddy turn into this scary monster. Ask yourself if she wants to get so familiar and accustomed to living with this towering inferno that she marries one just like it.

Tantrums are cute in a two year old. He’s not 2 anymore. But it’s the same response to life. He smashes things right now because they represent you. Are you waiting to be the thing he smashes?

Do not cling to false hope. He won’t get help because he’s told you many times, none of this is his fault.

Go talk to a priest.

(Let me guess. He was never like this before the wedding. It all happened when you got pregnant, right? And it’s getting worse.)

A normal man won’t want his baby crying. Let me guess again…he screams and throws things… baby cries. He stops. Looks at baby. Then yells at you “See what you’re doing to the baby!!!”

(Just a guess…)

 

[dulcissima]

This sounds so similar to my husband. We have a wonderful month or two really enjoying each other’s company and then bam! I fail him in some small misdemeanor and the world comes crashing down. He yells and screams and swears at me, smashes things, makes my two year old cry and then - silence. For days. The last episode lasted almost a week. Then when he finally comes around to talking it’s another sreaming match where he makes it all my fault he acted like that and then he thinks all is forgiven and we can go back to normal. Needless to say it has an adverse effect on our intimacy, I don’t trust him nor feel very attracted to him anymore. I have been so close to walking out so often. But I cling to hope. I really want to get him help or he will end up a lonely old man and I a single mother which I really don’t want, but he refuses to admit he has done anything wrong! What can I do?

You are describing the cycle of abuse and the honeymoon phase. Things are not going to get better no matter how close to perfect you become. Please talk to your priest and a domestic violence center. Your situation is probably worse than you realize.

And has someone who has been there and done that, believe me you are already a single mom with one very large explosive handicap (your angry husband). It’s much easier on your own.

 

[PAboy57]

Dear Blessed Mother,

Please help LifeisAmazing who is in a difficult relationship and really needs your help.

HAIL HOLY QUEEN

Hail, holy Queen, Mother of mercy, our life, our sweetness, and our hope! To thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve. To thee do we send up our sighs, mourning, and weeping in this valley of tears. Turn then, most gracious advocate, thine eyes of mercy toward us; and after this, our exile, show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus. O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary!

(V) Pray for us O holy Mother of God. (R) That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Amen.