Handling pushy sales people

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Anglewannabe

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Ok, I think I just made a fashion mistake.

I heard of a dress shop that is a bit out of the way for me. I decided to give it a try since the shopping in my area is limited to a few stores and I can tell exactly where other people bought their clothes. I wanted to see if I could find something a bit unique. This store has the reputation of carying a few of each item and the pieces are not common. I though it would be a good way to get something unique.

I don’t know what it is called, but I have seen some skirts that have ‘ruffles’ at the bottom. It looks like a slit but when one walks, the material seems to unfold like an accordion so there is a lot of leg room in the skirt.

I went to the store and tried to explain to a very grumpy owner what I was looking for. He kept repeating that the only way to have leg room was to get a skirt with a kick pleat. He obviously did not know what I was talking about. He was very grumpy and kept actin fed up like he knew everything. He kept telling me there was something wrong with my request :confused:

I tried on a skirt, while I was in the change room, he was at the counter taking care of other business. When I came out, I asked him over since I had a few quesions about the way the skirt fitted. He was not pleased,

The friend that was with me said ‘Angie, perhaps you should think about this before buying the skirt’. My thinking at the time was I might as well buy something while I was there since I probably won’t be in the area again soon and I could get my skirt and be done with it. Also, to be honest, I was nervous around the owner and too scared to ask him anymore questions.

So I bought the skirt. Now that I am home and some time has passed, I REALLY regret the purchase. I am not rich so it does hurt the pocket book. So, now my debate is do I

a-) Just wear the skirt as is

b-) give the skirt away and hopefully learn from the mistake

c-) make the trip out there to try and return it. I strongly suspect, at best I will get store credit

I must admit, I have been very tired this week and this probably didn’t help the situation.
I really wished I had just tooken my friends advice but at the time, but I was so at the end of my rope I couldn’t think straight.

I am just curious but how in the future can I deal with these situations. I am not talking about pushy sales people only. That one is easy, just don’t go shopping when I am tired. I am talking more about how to handle UNEXPECTED situations where I feel pressured into making a decision when I am not in a head space to think properly.

Angie
 
We all do things like this from time to time. If it’s new and you don’t like it bring it back. If you get store credit, could you use it to get a gift for someone’s birthday?

To be honest, this guy doesn’t sound pushy so much as rude. I would have probably left the store after being treated that way. I’ve always hated boutiques, I feel so uncomfortable in them.

The best thing to do really, is only buy something if a) you have an item on your “need to buy” list before you set out and you find that exact item or b) an item stops you in your tracks and you think, wow that would go perfectly with item X that I already own. I’m trying to do this now myself.
 
Return it and try to get your money or store credit…definitely! 👍
 
If you are not satisfied with your purchase, then take it back. Maybe you caught the clerk on a bad day and will have a better experience with someone else. In a way, sales people are YOUR employees for the time of purchase, most work on commission and you can fire them by walking out not buying anything.
 
Take it back.
If possible, try to go at a totally different time. Maybe someone else will be working.
If not, stand your ground. "I got it home, and decided it really wasn’t me. You were right, I’d like to return it. Kill 'em with kindness. But don’t back down. :onpatrol:
 
I don’t even see a pushy salesperson in this scenario. You pushed yourself to buy it.

You do seem to have a pattern of doing or saying or devulging things you don’t want to do, or say, or devulge and then claim it was a pushy person who made you do it. Perhaps something to talk over with a counselor, your self talk and anxiety that push you to do things you don’t want to do.
 
1ke said:
I don’t even see a pushy salesperson in this scenario. You pushed yourself to buy it.

You do seem to have a pattern of doing or saying or devulging things you don’t want to do, or say, or devulge and then claim it was a pushy person who made you do it. Perhaps something to talk over with a counselor, your self talk and anxiety that push you to do things you don’t want to do.
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She doesn’t need to be reprimanded, 1ke…

She must get her money back and be more positive before buying something, next time!
 
ShrodingersCat said:
We all do things like this from time to time. If it’s new and you don’t like it bring it back.
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Thanks for that 🙂 Makes me feel better that I am not the only one:p
ShrodingersCat said:
If you get store credit, could you use it to get a gift for someone’s birthday?
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Good idea, I never though about that
ShrodingersCat said:
To be honest, this guy doesn’t sound pushy so much as rude. I would have probably left the store after being treated that way. I’ve always hated boutiques, I feel so uncomfortable in them.
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I haven’t shopped much in boutiques, I didn’t realize this was the norm. The reason I didn’t leave is at the time, all I could think was ‘I drove all this way, I want to get something’. Maybe in the future, I won’t go so far to shop unless there is more than one store I want to visit
 
pianistclare said:
Take it back.
If possible, try to go at a totally different time. Maybe someone else will be working.
If not, stand your ground. "I got it home, and decided it really wasn’t me. You were right, I’d like to return it. Kill 'em with kindness. But don’t back down. :onpatrol:
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Since he was the owner, I don’t hold much hope that there will be a different person but it is definetly worth a shot.

Kill them with kindness…hmmmm will have to rehearse that one a few times before I go:p
 
1ke said:
I don’t even see a pushy salesperson in this scenario. You pushed yourself to buy it.

You do seem to have a pattern of doing or saying or devulging things you don’t want to do, or say, or devulge and then claim it was a pushy person who made you do it. Perhaps something to talk over with a counselor, your self talk and anxiety that push you to do things you don’t want to do.
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With all dues respect, you are not telling me anything I don’t know. That is the whole point of my post. I was asking how other people handle these situations. That’s why I like pianistclare’s suggestion to kill them with kindness
 
It doesn’t sound like he was pushy, it seems more like he was leaving you to your own devices in choosing something. What about this put you “at the end of my rope”? That’s really concerning

If you don’t like it, and the store allows for returns, then return it. Just make sure it’s within their policy.

Quite honestly, once he displayed attitude to me, I would have turned around and left. I’m not going to spend money in an establishment where the owner thinks I’m somehow frivolously taking up his time. I would venture to guess that there would be noting in this boutique that I couldn’t find elsewhere, including online.
 
I don’t see a pushy salesman in this situation at all.

I see that you went into a boutique that you knew had a very limited selection of off-the-beaten-path items, started pressing the owner about a skirt that he clearly didn’t have in stock and from the sounds of it, had never carried, and then proceeded to try on a different item, and instead of deciding for yourself or taking your friend’s advice and thinking about it, you bought it on the spot. I’m really failing to see how the owner’s exasperation with you had anything to do with your choice.

Regardless, the solution is pretty straightforward. This is a clothing store; you are not the first person to want to return something once you got it home. Call the boutique, ask about their return policy, and if they have one and you’re within the allotted time frame, go return or exchange it. If they do not allow returns, sell it online as a never worn item with the original tags on it. You should get close to what you paid.

There really is no advice anyone can give you on handling pushy sales people because that wasn’t the problem. The only problem was, you bought a skirt you didn’t love - there isn’t a woman on the face of the earth who hasn’t made a clothing purchase they later regret. I agree with 1ke, you should really consider why you tend to make your choices out to be the fault of others.
 
truetofaith said:
She doesn’t need to be reprimanded, 1ke…

She must get her money back and be more positive before buying something, next time!
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I wasn’t reprimanding anyone. Asking for solutions to a pushy salesperson problem won’t help someone who doesn’t have a pushy salesperson problem.

She has a different problem, one that comes up regularly in her social and work interactions, and my suggestion is that she work through the actual problem with a professional who can actually HELP her.
 
1ke said:
I wasn’t reprimanding anyone. Asking for solutions to a pushy salesperson problem won’t help someone who doesn’t have a pushy salesperson problem.

She has a different problem, one that comes up regularly in her social and work interactions, and my suggestion is that she work through the actual problem with a professional who can actually HELP her.
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OK, you were trying to give her some good advice…but how can you tell from this one pressure-filled incident that she has this problem on a regular basis and needs professional counselling?
 
truetofaith said:
OK, you were trying to give her some good advice…but how can you tell from this one pressure-filled incident that she has this problem on a regular basis and needs professional counselling?
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Several of us have been posting with Angie for quite a long time now.
 
DeniseNY said:
It doesn’t sound like he was pushy, it seems more like he was leaving you to your own devices in choosing something. What about this put you “at the end of my rope”? That’s really concerning
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I found he was pushy in the sense he kept insisting all skirts had kit pleats and was not wanting to take the time to listen to my request

What made me at the end of my rope is I am VERY pressed for time (lots going on in my life right now) and I took time out of my busy schedule to go to a store that was far away hoping I could just find something and be done with it. I am not saying his attitude is totally responsible, I knew I was coming in at ‘half mass’. It was more like his attitude was the straw that broke the camels back

Angie
 
Anglewannabe said:
I found he was pushy in the sense he kept insisting all skirts had kit pleats and was not wanting to take the time to listen to my request

What made me at the end of my rope is I am VERY pressed for time (lots going on in my life right now) and I took time out of my busy schedule to go to a store that was far away hoping I could just find something and be done with it. I am not saying his attitude is totally responsible, I knew I was coming in at ‘half mass’. It was more like his attitude was the straw that broke the camels back

Angie
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Well, I’d agree that not all roomy skirts have kick pleats. I think the issue was that skirts with them are the only thing he stocks. It makes sense to me. Smaller boutiques are very precise in what they carry (all the magazines would call it a “well curated selection”)

I think maybe you should try online shopping. You can do it at your leisure and it might even lead you to a brick and mortar store that has things to your taste.

There’s no shame in returning the skirt. Just know their policy before you go in.
 
Anglewannabe said:
I found he was pushy in the sense he kept insisting all skirts had kit pleats and was not wanting to take the time to listen to my request

What made me at the end of my rope is I am VERY pressed for time (lots going on in my life right now) and I took time out of my busy schedule to go to a store that was far away hoping I could just find something and be done with it. I am not saying his attitude is totally responsible, I knew I was coming in at ‘half mass’. It was more like his attitude was the straw that broke the camels back

Angie
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Maybe in future situations it might be helpful to change your mindset before you set out. I often shop for books that are no longer in print and/or I desire a certain version of the book.

I could shop online, but have had disappointments so prefer to seek them out in person.

BUT this means that I may very well drive quite a distance to visit a used book store or specialty book store, only to discover they don’t have one of the dozens of books I’m looking for. This can be disappointing - esp. if they specialize in the type of book I’m hunting for. However, I KNOW this in advance and go in, knowing my drive time, gas, etc may be for naught. On the other hand, sometimes I find a “treasure” - maybe a book I was looking for, maybe one I hadn’t known about but discovered there.

Either way, I set myself in advance knowing I may come home empty handed but reminding myself that there is fun in the search and if I don’t find it this time, maybe I’ll find something on my next attempt.

You were after a certain style of skirt and had hopes this place had it - they didn’t and that was disappointing, but maybe if you’d set yourself up mentally to be ready to leave empty handed if there wasn’t anything there you loved, then the combination of the owner and the disappointment might not have created the feeling of pressure?
 
DeniseNY said:
I think maybe you should try online shopping. You can do it at your leisure and it might even lead you to a brick and mortar store that has things to your taste.
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Just curious but how would i know if it fit. It has been my experience that sizing charts are not very accurate. Also, the postage to return the wrong item would be expensive

Angie
 
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