Clearly, what most posters seem to be wanting is greater clarity in terms of how justice and fairness would resolve the issue.
If you put a hand on someone, it is up to you to be very certain that the person will welcome it, as sure as if you were dealing with a person with the power to hire you or fire you.
If you are going to make remarks of an extremely personal kind–so personal that they could even be described as sexual–then you had better be as sure that your comments are welcome, just as sure as if you were talking to the person who has the power to hire you or fire you.
If you are not sure, don’t do it.
See? Wasn’t that easy? It works for men, it works for women, it works for heterosexuals, it works for homosexuals.
When our jobs are on the line because we’re dealing with someone in authority, somehow we know what respect is. When we imagine that the person we are taking liberties with can’t do anything about it if we cross a line, then we act confused. There really is no reason to be confused.
What about when it comes to who to believe when there are accusations? Again, is it that hard when it comes to money missing from a purse or a wallet? Yes, there is a responsibility to be careful about who you trust around that which is important to you, but there is also a certainty that when coworkers constantly grumble that someone can’t be left alone with their valuables that there might be something to the complaints. You realize both that there could have been a mistake and that most people aren’t in the habit of making false accusations about money missing from their wallets.
It is like the sexual abuse scandals having to do with children. Yes, you can forgive someone who embezzled money. No, you don’t allow them to be tellers at banks in the future. When trust is violated, there are reasonable consequences.
So people…if the people at work were complaining that money was disappearing from their personal effects, how would you handle that? Would you be more concerned that you might be accused or more concerned that there is someone roaming around at work helping themselves to what doesn’t belong to them or somehow concerned that everyone at work had developed a paranoia about their money or that a dozen people had suddenly decided to go on a witch hunt against someone they didn’t like?
The MeToo movement ought to be taken as a sign that this is not rare. I don’t know any women who say that all men do it, particularly not in a work setting. It is more something that happens when someone in a position of power feels he or she has immunity from any consequences of abuse of power.
I’m not thinking there will be push-back from men who don’t want to be told to be respectful. I think it is more likely there will be an expansion to “what about those who think verbal abuse is OK, as long as it is aimed at a man, because somehow we’re ‘less sensitive’ and ‘can take it’? How about we stop acting as if men want to be treated as if they don’t care how you talk to them or whether they are shown respect?”
Didn’t you just spend a great many posts explaining to me that any touch is battery?
