Has women in the work force helped or hurt the family?

[byers]

Just found and read through this long thread and I notice so many posting individual stories and personal experiences but in general not too many commented on the biggest changes to society overall of these drastic changes to the family (in general) in the past 50 years.Almost all these changes come from one source. The widespread rebellion against christianity’s teachings on artificial contraception.

Today’s mothers (and fathers) have been sold a bill of goods and without widespread contraception, especially since the advent of the birth control pill in the 60’s, these questions would be mute.

The immorality of artificial birth control, premarital sex etc have most certainly affected ‘the family’. - and all of society.

Obviously God’s plan for the ‘majority’ of familes precluded married women with children from being involved in the workplace once they had the first baby and the youngest were pretty well raised. Between pregnancies, births and nursing their children, not to mention all the daily care, and hard work this entails no mother could possibly have had the time to devote to any job outside the home. Only the fabulously wealthy in any age could do this - a very small minority in the population. The majority of jobs outside the home were held by single woman and those whose children were grown.

The majority of woman in the past never left their children in the care of strangers and only with family members when forced to do so. There were some things you could do while raising a family but nothing like today. And yes, there are some improvements today especially as regarding abuse of woman and abandoned woman with children, but a good society should always provide for these situations.

For those who haven’t already fallen for all this, the economics of today make it almost impossible for most woman to stay home and raise many children and even at that most woman do not wish to sacrifice their lives to childbearing and raising.

Betty Friedan who was mentioned on this thread was a card carrying communist promoting the communist agenda the communist program being for woman to stop having more than one or two children and to go into the workplace and hold jobs while placing their children in institutional care. There was much sympathy decades ago for the russian woman and later all those in the communist bloc, forced into this situation by communism. Planned Parenthood continues this program today worldwide and the goal is sterilization, contaception, and abortion to limit children and to get those woman into the workforce as soon as possible to ‘empower’ them and to get them away from their young children. The ultimate goal is the destruction of the family as God designed it.

Catholics of today should have been taught this and know better, but most were not. Protestants were also always taught that artificial contraception was sinful, but the various denominations starting tumblng on this in the 1930’s.

I am anxious to hear from those who spent their childhood since infancy in daycare, then in school with before and after school care. Who if they have any siblings it’s one or two at the most. Since institutionalized care (daycare) or a even a nanny who in no way is going to care as much about someone else’s children as there mother, was almost unheard of in this country until the 1980’s those who experience this should be quite young still. Perhaps they will want a different life for their own children. One can only hope.

 

[GraceDK]

Obviously God’s plan for the ‘majority’ of familes precluded married women with children from being involved in the workplace once they had the first baby and the youngest were pretty well raised. Between pregnancies, births and nursing their children, not to mention all the daily care, and hard work this entails no mother could possibly have had the time to devote to any job outside the home. Only the fabulously wealthy in any age could do this - a very small minority in the population. The majority of jobs outside the home were held by single woman and those whose children were grown.

The majority of woman in the past never left their children in the care of strangers and only with family members when forced to do so. .

Hm, I don’t know what historical sources you have studied.
Both my parents come from a background of agriculture and its very clear that on the small farms the woman worked full time in the fields, sometimes even while she was breastfeeding. Bigger farms often had socalled wetnurses or nannies, and all people worked very hard, including the women who were young mothers.
The only women who had time to be a full time-look your child in the face kind of mother were the very wealthy ones, and they often also had nurses and maids to take care of their children alot.
In the cities couples would often both work their butts off in some small family owned business where they were hardly ever off. Many women sowed or worked otherwise for richer people. These women, while they might be in sight, were often busy and tired.
So please understand: The vast majority of women have always worked hard, in and outside the home. The Bible itself tells us about a woman who worked hard in and outside the home, went to the market place etc.

The psychological schools have taught us in the modern age to sit and interact alot with little babies and to talk about attachment and primary caretakers, and that is great… In many ways I think children have never had it better than today because of this knowlege. I have visited cultures where children were running wild with a mother in the vicinity who cared little about them and didn’t wish to have them (didn’t know about NFP and just kept having one child after the other)…

I take issue with the fact that you use the word stranger about non-family members. I also had quite a few nannies when I was a child. Carefully selected Christian women who I loved. These were not strangers to me.
In daycare institutions or other institutions the average good christian parent also check out the place and the people before letting his/her child spend time there… My sister works with little children during the day. She says the children form good bonds fast with the day-care women.

This doesn’t mean I think children should be given over to daycare before the age of 2 or that they should stay all day long in such a place… but I find you post a bit unnuanced.

 

[Serap]

Hm, I don’t know what historical sources you have studied.
Both my parents come from a background of agriculture and its very clear that on the small farms the woman worked full time in the fields, sometimes even while she was breastfeeding. Bigger farms often had socalled wetnurses or nannies, and all people worked very hard, including the women who were young mothers.
The only women who had time to be a full time-look your child in the face kind of mother were the very wealthy ones, and they often also had nurses and maids to take care of their children alot.
In the cities couples would often both work their butts off in some small family owned business where they were hardly ever off. Many women sowed or worked otherwise for richer people. These women, while they might be in sight, were often busy and tired.
So please understand: The vast majority of women have always worked hard, in and outside the home. The Bible itself tells us about a woman who worked hard in and outside the home, went to the market place etc.

The psychological schools have taught us in the modern age to sit and interact alot with little babies and to talk about attachment and primary caretakers, and that is great… In many ways I think children have never had it better than today because of this knowlege. I have visited cultures where children were running wild with a mother in the vicinity who cared little about them and didn’t wish to have them (didn’t know about NFP and just kept having one child after the other)…

I take issue with the fact that you use the word stranger about non-family members. I also had quite a few nannies when I was a child. Carefully selected Christian women who I loved. These were not strangers to me.
In daycare institutions or other institutions the average good christian parent also check out the place and the people before letting his/her child spend time there… My sister works with little children during the day. She says the children form good bonds fast with the day-care women.

This doesn’t mean I think children should be given over to daycare before the age of 2 or that they should stay all day long in such a place… but I find you post a bit unnuanced.

Our live-in nanny is definitely not a stranger and she is very much loved by me and my kids. My nanny genuinely loves my kids too. This perplexes me also b/c I see it so differently with our nanny. Perhaps I am just very lucky

 

[Sparki777]

I have to agree with Grace. My family were farmers way back, and the women all worked in the fields and in the barns, whether they had a nursing baby or not. My grandmother used to tell me that her mother had a day for maternity leave, maybe two, before she was back to cooking and milking (cows respond to whomever milks them, and her share of the herd needed her back quickly) and probably a week before she was back to doing laundry – by hand, which is really back-breaking work – and the other farm work. On my dad’s side, the city dwellers, all the women worked whether it was taking in laundry or sewing or going out to work as a housemaid.

Furthermore, just because a mom is home doesn’t mean she’s attentive and loving, and just because a mom works outside the home doesn’t mean the kids are deprived. My own mother stayed home with us and was completely self-centered and indifferent toward us. I have always worked (out of necessity; see my previous message), but I know my kids far better than my mom ever knew me, I spend more time with them, I share more of the Christian life with them (i.e., prayer, worship, Bible study), and I’m far more involved with their lives. When my husband and I were not working opposite shifts, my kids were cared for by their godmother or a cousin, both of whom loved them genuinely.