Having Three kids = Showing Off!

[armywife]

I just thought it was sad when someone was quoted in the article as saying that a third child was a luxury.

Also, it said the average child get’s 70 new toys a year… my exact words were “holy !@#$” My four kids only get new toys on Christmas and their birthdays and thay MIGHT total to 70 per year for ALL FOUR!!! We’re just all way too materialistic.

 

[GhostMan]

As the father of 9, that makes me a world class show-off then.

 

[Jennifer_J]

This begs the question…Are parents morally obligated to fund each child’s college tution?

No

 

[gardenswithkids]

As the father of 9, that makes me a world class show-off then.

Ooo-a triple-time show off! However do you afford the nannies?

 

[Goth_Catholic]

Living in NY would be very difficult for large families now a days.

Depends on the defination of large and where in NY your talking about. Up here most families have 3 kids instead of 2 and I know several who have 4. And i’m not talking about step families ethier.

 

[strngrnrth]

This begs the question…Are parents morally obligated to fund each child’s college tution?

No, and most don’t. A majority of college students today, around three in four, are paying their own way or on scholarships. And about one in eight doesn’t go to college at all, even now that college is the new high school, and some of them still become very successful.

 

[klowery]

Sanctamaria17, what would you have done if your parents could not contribute a dime toward your education?

That is the true situation that many, many families find themselves in. Consider yourself very lucky that not only do you have the opportunity to go to the finest schools, travel abroad, and share your leisure time with your “sisters,” and it isn’t even on your dime!

 

[sanctamaria17]

I am very grateful for it! And I just said, my abroad time is coming out of my pocket. I don’t know what I would have done. I was just giving my point of view and I’m sorry if I offended anyone. It was the same in each of my parents’ families and they wanted to make sure that didn’t happen with us.

 

[Island_Oak]

…now that college is the new high school, and some of them still become very successful.

…which brings up the topic of H.S.–quickly becoming as expensive as funding a college education for a private school experience!!

I know we’re not “obligated” but some of the public school options can be pretty scary–and I’m not talking about gangs or lousy academics. In our district, considered desireable because of its excellent schools, the H.S. is an “open campus” meaning the kiddies (yes, even the 14 y.o. freshmen) can leave/come late if they don’t have a class with no need to clear their departure or whereabouts with a parent or the school. So I could theoretically have no idea where my kids are, with whom, what they are doing or even if they are supervised on any given day of the week at, say 11 am. The alternative? Fork out tuition starting at $10K up to $22K per year x 3 kids (we’re show offs too) for the private option.

 

[teme]

To the question of whether we are morally obligated to pay for our kids’ college, I’d say no… We’re obligated to make sure they are educated, and give them the tools to succeed. I believe this starts when the child is born, and after 18 years, the kid should have enough skills, abilities, and tools to figure out a way to pay for his or her own college. I paid for my own, went to the highest rated school in that state (also nationally ranked), and am not independently wealthy. My parents raised me to understand the value of work, education, and it started when I was young. To believe that a good college education will make the child succeed is incorrect, and a bit too late. The college education, and the ability to handle it alone is, I believe, the affirmation that the child was in fact given the tools and “raised” right by the parents. Will my wife and I help out our kids, probably. But we’re laying the groundwork now that each of them better find a way to pay for it themselves (and they’re 10, 4, 2 and 3 months).

From the article, I found this very interesting:

Between diapers and bouncy seats, parents can count on spending at least $6,500 on the first year of baby gear alone. “You walk into Babies R Us, and you’re just overwhelmed,” recalls Brooke Houghton, a 35-year-old mom from Chicago who said she ran out of the store in panic after 15 minutes. “There was just so much equipment I hadn’t even considered.”

Sounds like the problem is society is telling people they need to spend much more than is necessary. What in the world are they spending things on? All that is needed are about 1 week of clothing (so 21 sets of onesies, pants, shirts), a carseat, a few hundred dollars of cloth diapers, and a few good nursing bras. And, once you’ve already had one child, you don’t need to buy much of anything more. Now, do I and my DW spend more than that? Sure, and we thankfully have been blessed by God to afford it. But do we need to spend more? Nope. And don’t people give away old baby things, clothes, etc to others when they don’t have any more kids?