Having trouble with the sacrifice of being a mother

[Kindness]

I would suggest something practical and that is to find a responsible college student who can be a “Mother’s Helper” and watch the children or play with them in the yard while you take some time for yourself. Even if it’s siting with your feet up, a cup of coffee and a book. (I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t cracked open a book for a very long time). Just having a break when you have so much responsibility and your husband is away so much can be a lifeline. Your are under a lot of stress and it sounds like you do not have any stress relief. For your own health and mental sanity figure out what kind of stress relievers would help and how you can fit them into your life. If it is a financial stretch right now to have some help I would see it as an investment in you and your family. It won’t be for ever, as the children get older they will able to play together and independently. But realistically they are very dependent for the first three years especially. How long will you put off looking after yourself? I would say it is your family’s number one priority right now.

Some women never want or need help with their children, some have family who can help, give emotional support and babysit - but don’t compare yourself to them. Do the things that will help you to be a more rested, relaxed and happy mommy. This is the best thing you can do for your whole family.

God bless you

 

[severus68]

I would suggest something practical and that is to find a responsible college student who can be a “Mother’s Helper” and watch the children or play with them in the yard while you take some time for yourself. Even if it’s siting with your feet up, a cup of coffee and a book. (I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t cracked open a book for a very long time). Just having a break when you have so much responsibility and your husband is away so much can be a lifeline. Your are under a lot of stress and it sounds like you do not have any stress relief. For your own health and mental sanity figure out what kind of stress relievers would help and how you can fit them into your life. If it is a financial stretch right now to have some help I would see it as an investment in you and your family. It won’t be for ever, as the children get older they will able to play together and independently. But realistically they are very dependent for the first three years especially. How long will you put off looking after yourself? I would say it is your family’s number one priority right now.

Some women never want or need help with their children, some have family who can help, give emotional support and babysit - but don’t compare yourself to them. Do the things that will help you to be a more rested, relaxed and happy mommy. This is the best thing you can do for your whole family.

God bless you

Well said.

 

[Iheartcoffee]

I know others have said the same thing, but I have to repeat the idea of making sure to take some time for your own health. There’s nothing wrong with being burned out. It happens! Just make sure to take some time to find a balance. Being healthy means having a balance. Taking some time to recharge will make you happier. When you are happier and healthier you will have more energy for your kids.

 

[Josephene]

Parenting , as mentioned in one of the posts, can be seen as doing small things with great love - but that love may not be in constant warm feelings as much as in recognising the need and power of moments spent in prayer , even in the midst of diaper changes and tantrums ; recognising the need and grace to repent and ask for mercy , on behalf of all in one’s own life - including those from the past generations , with an attitude of trusting gratitude for God’s mercy probabaly has lots of impact at levels we may not even foresee now and thus , one gets to be thankful for the time one is given to do so , even if others may not see the richness of one’s time !

nbccongress.org/features/prayer-for-healing.asp - the article and the related book on Family Healing gives an indication of of the deepr role of the Divine Mercy Devotion too ; hope there would a large image of Divine Mercy in the house, in atelast one room and moments of lonliness , esp. good to loot at the compassioante gaze of The Lord , to bring all to His mercy -

faustina-message.com/ - site to download the original image .

Meditating on the Lord’s Passion , esp His sense of lonlines in The Garden, all of those moments of garnering strenght and presence of The Holy Spirit for each of us , when we too would face similar situations and recognising that , doing so , in union with many others , such as those in nursing homes , can bring us such sense of being in communion with The Lord and others in Him …and all such can help to tranform the children , into being Spirit filled , peaceful children who would be one day , powerful for The Kingdom !

Leaving on a C.D of Gregorian chant is an instant transport to the quiet and peace of an abbey ; good bible C.D s too , a way to make time, to be with The Lord , to be thus refreshed and strong !

Turning on, or singing out loud , good hymns and such such as the one to the Holy Spirit on youtube - another way to bring in the anointing of The Spirit , even into the whole neighborhood …and that anointing, to carry one, to be taught in all things of The Lord !

Hope there is enough iodine , such as from use of iodised salt ( having read how iodine deficiency after pregnanacy can manifest as tiredness )

More grace and power to all the mothers and fathers who are being made holier , through parenthood !