Heartbreak

[BionicPianoMan]

She’s been divorced before and I think she has some personal issues she needs to deal with along with problems we had between us. So I think it is actually over.

When I pray at night, I’m afraid to ask God to bring us back together because I’m afraid to hope. Sometimes I ask him to and sometimes I don’t. I’m afraid of having to go through all these emotions again.

Thank you for your prayers. I could really use them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not functioning like myself at all and all I do is stay home and avoid people. It’s just hard for me to understand how we could be months away from being engaged to being like this.

 

[PaulinVA]

When I pray at night, I’m afraid to ask God to bring us back together because I’m afraid to hope. Sometimes I ask him to and sometimes I don’t. I’m afraid of having to go through all these emotions again.
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May I suggest that you pray for the grace to make the right decisions, and ask God to make His will known to you? Can’t go wrong with that!

 

[TheRealJuliane]

She’s been divorced before and I think she has some personal issues she needs to deal with along with problems we had between us. So I think it is actually over.

When I pray at night, I’m afraid to ask God to bring us back together because I’m afraid to hope. Sometimes I ask him to and sometimes I don’t. I’m afraid of having to go through all these emotions again.

Thank you for your prayers. I could really use them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not functioning like myself at all and all I do is stay home and avoid people. It’s just hard for me to understand how we could be months away from being engaged to being like this.

You are grieving. It’s normal. You should see, over time, a gradual improvement, and if you don’t see that, you probably need to go and talk to a doctor. Our brains sometimes go into a sort of shock during an emotional trauma, and don’t produce the right chemicals and so we can get into a depression instead of just grieving.

Maybe this is a good thing, or will be. If she was divorced, you might have to deal with all sorts of issues from her past. Her ex-husband, unless he’s dead, would be some factor within your marriage, even if they didn’t have children. If they did have children then you have a long life of connection with this man.

One thing I find helpful when I am tempted to wallow in self-pity is to put a limit on how much time I can allow my emotions to control me…Like, “I will cry and feel sorry for myself for 30 minutes, but then I need to get a few things done.” Put on sad music, read letters, remember those sweet times, but then when the time is up, dry your tears, put the sad feelings aside, and go out and do some things for yourself.

Just a suggestion. You’re still in shock and it takes time. You will remain in my prayers and God bless you going forward.