Help I feel trapped in the web of the CC

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Hi, It’s been a while since I’ve posted…

Just a few lines to catch up w/ those of you who helped me out over this past winter…I wanted to let you know how things are going.

I have been meeting every week now w/ a good priest on my way to joining the Church this comming May 23 rd…He is truely an exceptional man & has lead me with God’s help to a whole new life in the Church. pretty awsome stuff …& all because you guys hung in there with me & lead me to find him - Thanks !

Things are getting better & better for me in every area of my life. I keep realizing how much there is to know about the Catholic faith. It’s been quite the ride. I am forever grateful to you all for helping me out ! Now I realize it’s my job to use what God has taught me, & what I have experienced in my life, to do the work he made me to do…

Hope your all doing well too - Mikehere 🙂
 
mikehere said:
Hi, It’s been a while since I’ve posted…

Just a few lines to catch up w/ those of you who helped me out over this past winter…I wanted to let you know how things are going.

I have been meeting every week now w/ a good priest on my way to joining the Church this comming May 23 rd…He is truely an exceptional man & has lead me with God’s help to a whole new life in the Church. pretty awsome stuff …& all because you guys hung in there with me & lead me to find him - Thanks !

Things are getting better & better for me in every area of my life. I keep realizing how much there is to know about the Catholic faith. It’s been quite the ride. I am forever grateful to you all for helping me out ! Now I realize it’s my job to use what God has taught me, & what I have experienced in my life, to do the work he made me to do…

Hope your all doing well too - Mikehere 🙂
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Super glad to hear from you.

Praise God that we were able to help in some small way and Thank God for sending you such a wonderful priest.

Peace
James
 
I’ve been lurking this thread for a while now and have seen Mike go from
mikehere said:
Help ?

I am married 20 yrs to my Catholic wife & I feel like I just don’t matter anymore…I tried the RCIA 10 yrs ago…Can’t find it in my heart to believe in trans-sub…so membership in the CC is not a possibility….when I’ve tried attending my own Protestant church, my wife freaks out fearing our children will not stay the coarse as Catholics. I quit attending Mass with my family in June of this yr…My wife actually asked me not to come anymore…like 3 or 4 times…I feel us slipping farther & farther apart…I hate my life right now & wish I’d never been born …Ive tried talking in prvt msgs here w/other Catholics about the situation & it just dead ends when our conversations get to the spot where I can not accept trans sub real. I’m falling apart over this & don’t know what to do…One thing I know in my heart is I can never believe in the stuff I’d have to accept to join her in the CC…+ I’ve never experienced anything but cold unwelcoming indifference there anyway. Does anyone know of a on line support group for people married to Catholics? It just seems like no one cares…and there’s no hope of anything improving… If there is a God, I’ve come to believe he keeps sending misery into my life just to see how much more I can take…
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to this:
mikehere said:
Hi, It’s been a while since I’ve posted…

Just a few lines to catch up w/ those of you who helped me out over this past winter…I wanted to let you know how things are going.
**
I have been meeting every week now w/ a good priest on my way to joining the Church this comming May 23 rd…He is truely an exceptional man & has lead me with God’s help to a whole new life in the Church. pretty awsome stuff …**…& all because you guys hung in there with me & lead me to find him - Thanks !

Things are getting better & better for me in every area of my life. I keep realizing how much there is to know about the Catholic faith. It’s been quite the ride. I am forever grateful to you all for helping me out ! Now I realize it’s my job to use what God has taught me, & what I have experienced in my life, to do the work he made me to do…

Hope your all doing well too - Mikehere 🙂
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God is Good. :extrahappy:Welcome home! :hug3:
 
Welcome Home, Mike!!! I’m so happy to hear from and to hear that your journey is bringing you home to the CC. May 23d! You’re going to beat me! I’m still waiting in that pesky annulment!
  • Repeat mantra: I will be patient. I will be patient*
You’ve put a big smile on my face today! I bet your wife is very happy as well !

Please stay in touch. 🙂
 
mikehere said:
Well guys here I am…Getting ready to join…

I told my wife on Valentines day as James & Lemon suggested… it went good, but lots of tears for us both ( happy ones) . Thanks so much for the push you two…I needed it, & God put you there to help me at just the right time. 🙂 Tx ! She had no idea I had been working on this… Wow has it changed our relasionship huge for the better.
We have been talking and sharing like never before. I think I had been rejecting her just as much as she rejected me over this - it’s all healing now…

Last Sun we went to church together where I’ll be doing my instruction …(not her regular church) She was totally supportive, & very happy with me for wanting to do this / finding my own way…I think she is a little intimidated though by me knowing more than she about the church…but it’s all good.

The kneeling & sigining are new and strange to me, but also feel somehow right too at the same time. I am very relieved to have shared what I’ve been up to all this time. I also have found a good leader / advisor in the Priest I am working with…He’s perfect for me.

Thought you all might like to know what’s been happening…

So Long for now, & thanks again for all your help along the way…

Mike
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Mike, have read through most of the thread today. When I got to the above post, well,
I had a huge lump in my throat. I am so happy for you and your family. Early in the
thread, I wanted to tell you that sometimes those of us born into the faith Catholics
have difficulty putting into words why or what we believe. As an example, I know that
when I flip the switch to turn on the light, I will see the light come on. (Baring a burnt
bulb or electrical outage) Now, for me to tell you the technical reason for it happening,
I’d have a hard time. Now, I have no problem explaining the faith to friends or even
an acquaintance, but if it is a family member, I have a harder time. (Like trying to
explain why you love your mother. If some family member asked me that, I would
be thinking "Gosh, did I do something to make them think I don’t love my mother?)
Hope this makes some sense. I think it might help explain your wife’s inability to
communicate with you.
Suggestion: Maybe you can go and tell that minister what we Catholics really believe
about Grace!!! He’ll have the correct information.
 
Congratulations and God’s richest blessings to you and your family Mike! I have read most of this thread, just skipping a bit here and there.

I can’t help but mention that perhaps now you realize why people did not come up and talk to you as you described early in the thread when you went to Mass with your wife. Catholics don’t do that at Mass - it is a time for reflection and prayer. But, once you get to meeting others at the times there is for fellowship, then you can talk and get to know a lot of people.

May you have a joyous journey with the Lord!
 
wow mike. i thought the confirmation mass tonight made my day.

YOUR POST made my day.
 
mikehere said:
Hi, It’s been a while since I’ve posted…

Just a few lines to catch up w/ those of you who helped me out over this past winter…I wanted to let you know how things are going.

I have been meeting every week now w/ a good priest on my way to joining the Church this comming May 23 rd…He is truely an exceptional man & has lead me with God’s help to a whole new life in the Church. pretty awsome stuff …& all because you guys hung in there with me & lead me to find him - Thanks !

Things are getting better & better for me in every area of my life. I keep realizing how much there is to know about the Catholic faith. It’s been quite the ride. I am forever grateful to you all for helping me out ! Now I realize it’s my job to use what God has taught me, & what I have experienced in my life, to do the work he made me to do…

Hope your all doing well too - Mikehere 🙂
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Mike…

I just found this thread, and after reading your first post and then seeing this one…I am just filled with much gladness. Welcome home, my brother in Christ, welcome home.

May we all continue to help others find the Church, and may we work with our Protestant friends in the hopes of reuniting all of Christianity.

Mike, you are a big part of the Church’s work to reunite the Faith. You may be just one person, but just one person coming to the Church is huge, my friend.
 
mikehere said:
Hi, It’s been a while since I’ve posted…

Just a few lines to catch up w/ those of you who helped me out over this past winter…I wanted to let you know how things are going.

I have been meeting every week now w/ a good priest on my way to joining the Church this comming May 23 rd…He is truely an exceptional man & has lead me with God’s help to a whole new life in the Church. pretty awsome stuff …& all because you guys hung in there with me & lead me to find him - Thanks !

Things are getting better & better for me in every area of my life. I keep realizing how much there is to know about the Catholic faith. It’s been quite the ride. I am forever grateful to you all for helping me out ! Now I realize it’s my job to use what God has taught me, & what I have experienced in my life, to do the work he made me to do…

Hope your all doing well too - Mikehere 🙂
Click to expand...
That’s such wonderful news!! :extrahappy: :extrahappy: :extrahappy:
 
Congratulations, Mike! Your story shows the goodness and wonder of God’s grace. (All our stories do for who among us deserves such love?) I am very happy for you and your family. All the best to you and God bless! 🙂
 
Dear Mike:

Yay!
Wow!
Yippee!

I’m so happy for you. . .and WELCOME. . .God is doing a great work in you.

It’s very encouraging/humbling/strengthening to read your post!

Judi
 
Hi everyone…not sure who’s still around / subscribed…but thought I would send an update…This past week I asked the priest at my wife’s church to make me a member, and find me someplace to try to fit in… I saw him privately about 6 weeks ago to told him some of my story, & let him know I had joined the church in another parish. At that point I was not sure if I would be able to join my families parish,…but now I feel feel God is asking me to…so I made the call…This church / parish still has many things they could get batter at …but, I feel God asking me to at least try to get involved and maybe make some things better. It would be a blessing if something good could finally come from all I went through.

I’ve had a great summer…fun w/ family and friends…several trips to our cabin & also 2 weeks in Germany w/ my wife’s brother & his family…God has continued to belss my family above and beyond - I am sooooo greatful !!. I do continue to see Fa Mike were I was confirmed every month or so too - we have become good friends.

My road is not easy, but I’m finding my way…Thanks to all who helped me out last year…hope you are all well,

Mikehere 2 - the Catholic- 🙂
 
mikehere2 said:
Hi everyone…not sure who’s still around / subscribed…but thought I would send an update…This past week I asked the priest at my wife’s church to make me a member, and find me someplace to try to fit in… I saw him privately about 6 weeks ago to told him some of my story, & let him know I had joined the church in another parish. At that point I was not sure if I would be able to join my families parish,…but now I feel feel God is asking me to…so I made the call…This church / parish still has many things they could get batter at …but, I feel God asking me to at least try to get involved and maybe make some things better. It would be a blessing if something good could finally come from all I went through.

I’ve had a great summer…fun w/ family and friends…several trips to our cabin & also 2 weeks in Germany w/ my wife’s brother & his family…God has continued to belss my family above and beyond - I am sooooo greatful !!. I do continue to see Fa Mike were I was confirmed every month or so too - we have become good friends.

My road is not easy, but I’m finding my way…Thanks to all who helped me out last year…hope you are all well,

Mikehere 2 - the Catholic- 🙂
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Thanks for the update, I’m glad things are rolling along smoothing for you now!! God bless, and welcome home 👍
 
Your wife shouldn’t be telling you what to do especially if she has no good reason to. You go to the church you want wether she likes it or not. 🙂 Stay strong and don’t let your wife bring you down. You need to lay it out for her that if you want to go to church, you will do it wether she says to or not. She cannot control you.
 
mikehere2 said:
Hi everyone…not sure who’s still around / subscribed…but thought I would send an update…This past week I asked the priest at my wife’s church to make me a member, and find me someplace to try to fit in… I saw him privately about 6 weeks ago to told him some of my story, & let him know I had joined the church in another parish. At that point I was not sure if I would be able to join my families parish,…but now I feel feel God is asking me to…so I made the call…This church / parish still has many things they could get batter at …but, I feel God asking me to at least try to get involved and maybe make some things better. It would be a blessing if something good could finally come from all I went through.

I’ve had a great summer…fun w/ family and friends…several trips to our cabin & also 2 weeks in Germany w/ my wife’s brother & his family…God has continued to belss my family above and beyond - I am sooooo greatful !!. I do continue to see Fa Mike were I was confirmed every month or so too - we have become good friends.

My road is not easy, but I’m finding my way…Thanks to all who helped me out last year…hope you are all well,

Mikehere 2 - the Catholic- 🙂
Click to expand...
👍👍

Peace
James
 
mikehere said:
Help ?

I am married 20 yrs to my Catholic wife & I feel like I just don’t matter anymore…I tried the RCIA 10 yrs ago…Can’t find it in my heart to believe in trans-sub…so membership in the CC is not a possibility…when I’ve tried attending my own Protestant church, my wife freaks out fearing our children will not stay the coarse as Catholics. I quit attending Mass with my family in June of this yr…My wife actually asked me not to come anymore…like 3 or 4 times…I feel us slipping farther & farther apart…I hate my life right now & wish I’d never been born …Ive tried talking in prvt msgs here w/other Catholics about the situation & it just dead ends when our conversations get to the spot where I can not accept trans sub real. I’m falling apart over this & don’t know what to do…One thing I know in my heart is I can never believe in the stuff I’d have to accept to join her in the CC…+ I’ve never experienced anything but cold unwelcoming indifference there anyway. Does anyone know of a on line support group for people married to Catholics? It just seems like no one cares…and there’s no hope of anything improving… If there is a God, I’ve come to believe he keeps sending misery into my life just to see how much more I can take…
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Dear brother Mike.

First off… sorry for the indifference and coldness you have experienced at Church. Many people in the Church has a lot of painful selfscrutiny to do about what it means to ‘be Church’ namely that its supposed to be an actual fellowship and not just an assembly of strangers with a personal relationship with the Eucharist but no real relationship with the person next to them on the pew.
Please forgive us for the sicknesses and stiffened structures that have become too normal in our parishes.
I don’t want to say alot of things to you, but one thing I have to say:
You have a right to go to your church. Thats your right and you need ask no ones permission. You need to think about getting fed by the Christian fellowship and the Holy Spirit in the congregation where you can say amen to the teachings taught.
Your wife ought to be thankful that you love our Lord and not prevent you from nurturing that love in fellowship with other believers. You need to set your foot down on this one.

Peace to you in Jesus.
 
BlueShadow123 said:
Your wife shouldn’t be telling you what to do especially if she has no good reason to. You go to the church you want wether she likes it or not. 🙂 Stay strong and don’t let your wife bring you down. You need to lay it out for her that if you want to go to church, you will do it wether she says to or not. She cannot control you.
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I can’t believe you’ve read the content of this thread because your advise is way off base here. He’s just talking about joining another Catholic parish, not about joining a different ecclesial body of believers. Cool your jets, buddy! He only means his wife’s parish isn’t appealing to him because he finds it cold and impersonal, not that she is “forcing” him to go to a denomination he doesn’t wish to be a part of. Please get things straight before posting such a strong condemnation of Mike’s good wife.

Mike, I’m so happy for you and your family. And I commend you for wanting to get involved and help make your family’s parish a more welcoming place. Parishes often don’t realize the impression they are giving to others. They sometimes need a good “kick”, lovingly given, to help them out of their complacency. I’m sure God has good things in store for you. Just be patient and pray, pray, pray!
 
Welcome to the family, Mike! I didn’t post originally (because everyone else did such a good job of answering), but followed your story and certainly remembered you and your family in my prayers. Certainly there is no perfect parish. Here’s hoping that you can help make things better at this one!
 
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