Help! I like someone who is Baptist

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AlainVanille

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She is nice and in my school is probably the only person to actually care about me, and beyond the superficial as well (in other words, someone who is actually sensitive to my feelings).

Long story short, I think I’m falling for her.
There’s just one problem though (not saying that what she is is a problem itself) - she’s a Baptist and does not believe in Catholic.

I can’t really think straight (for now)… What should I do?
Can I still join her to see her ‘Church’? Or partake in their upcoming Christmas celebrations? If I were to do so, would it be a sin on my part? Since I would do it knwoingly and willingly.

I’m not much into religion actually as long as I know someone truly has faith in God, I pray that we will all be reunited once again. But nevertheless, I cannot deny that religion has become so much a part of our lives that there will always be something up with it.

I thank you for your comments and suggestions, advice and help.
I’m just saying this… I hope whatever it is, only God knows what is best for us all.
 
You mean that you like her romantically:confused: Bring it up with a priest loyal to the Magisterium:). Seek out the teaching of the Church on the matter:thumbsup: Advice on a forum can be mixed.

In the OT though, Ezra and Nehemiah reproved those that took foreign wives. If she’s hostile to Catholicism then romance over time might weaken and endanger your faith. But like I said bring it up with a priest:cool:
 
Your profile indicates you are not yet Catholic. This means I would seriously warn against being in a relationship with this girl. Baptists believe a lot of complete lies about Catholicism and as I assume you are still not fully educated in the faith then being with someone like that would be very dangerous and counter-productive. Be friends, by all means, but do not be in a relationship.

If you are not a baptised Catholic, you are technically free to join their celebrations but if you want to be a Catholic then going is not recommended. I would not go to her church or any worship celebration of theirs - go to a Catholic church, if that is where you feel you belong.

A relationship is a discernment for marriage. With someone of a different church, there are just too many conflicts that arise. It is not advisable.

You are in my prayers.
 
Sincere friends are hard to come by. 😃
You are young and in school. I’d grow the friendship and avoid deep religous discussions.

If she starts to dish too much on Catholics, it will tell you something about her level of Christian Charity. :mad:

Minor comments though will give you something to study. Catholics on this site will arm you with all the doctrine you require 👍
 
She is nice and in my school is probably the only person to actually care about me, and beyond the superficial as well (in other words, someone who is actually sensitive to my feelings).
Long story short, I think I’m falling for her.
There’s just one problem though (not saying that what she is is a problem itself) - she’s a Baptist and does not believe in Catholic.
I can’t really think straight (for now)… What should I do?
Can I still join her to see her ‘Church’? Or partake in their upcoming Christmas celebrations? If I were to do so, would it be a sin on my part? Since I would do it knwoingly and willingly.
I’m not much into religion actually as long as I know someone truly has faith in God, I pray that we will all be reunited once again. But nevertheless, I cannot deny that religion has become so much a part of our lives that there will always be something up with it.
I thank you for your comments and suggestions, advice and help.
I’m just saying this… I hope whatever it is, only God knows what is best for us all.

Alain hasn’t said specifically that he’s discerning for marriage.

And I don’t think you must date only for marriage.

Nor that your different religious viewpoints in itself will cause a problem.

What you must know is 1) what sort of relationship you’re looking for, 2) and are you ready for it?
 
PerfectTiming said:
Your profile indicates you are not yet Catholic. This means I would seriously warn against being in a relationship with this girl. Baptists believe a lot of complete lies about Catholicism and as I assume you are still not fully educated in the faith then being with someone like that would be very dangerous and counter-productive. Be friends, by all means, but do not be in a relationship.

A relationship is a discernment for marriage. With someone of a different church, there are just too many conflicts that arise. It is not advisable.

You are in my prayers.
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My best friends family is Baptist and we ‘talk’ from time to time about religion, and they are told a lot of lies about Catholocism.

I did not practice my faith when I got married, so we had the ceremony in my wifes Congregationalist church. When I started going back to the Catholic church my wife fought tooth and nail about having our marriage blessed by the priest and raising our children Catholic. She has since changed her mind and even enrolled in RCIA. She says it was because of my faith example and things I have taught her about the faith that she didn’t know or someone had lied to her about.

My friend, if you are going to become Catholic, learn as much as you can about the faith. And if you feel you want to be involved with this girl, be firm in your faith and set the Christian example. Others will follow.

I will pray for you. God Bless.

-Michael
“For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world but loses his own soul?” -Matthew 16:26
 
Alain hasn’t said specifically that he’s discerning for marriage,and I don’t believe that he needs to, or that different religious viewpoints in itself will cause a problem.

Alain,

God knows best, and sometimes he intends for people to cross paths, but the decision as to whether or not you’ve romantic a future with her has little to do with divine intervention. It’s to do with you (and her).

What you must know is, assuming that she’s interested in you as well, 1) what sort of relationship you’re looking for, 2) and are you ready for it 3) is this the proper time, the proper place? I know it’s difficult, but you need to be frank with yourself.

If you feel mostly satisfied with your life and are confident, if you’ve a couple close friends (needn’t be that many), and if you’re not struggling through a major change in your life (e.g., starting uni/college, going abroad, starting a new job, etc) – I’d say go for it. If not, you’ll want to rethink pursuing her.
 
Bezant said:
Alain hasn’t said specifically that he’s discerning for marriage,and I don’t believe that he needs to, or that different religious viewpoints in itself will cause a problem.
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He loves her and foresees her as a possible lifelong partner. You don’t think a Baptist women would have great difficulty raising his children Catholic?
 
What kind of Baptist is she? Many American Baptist can be very accepting.
If she’s Southern Baptist, or even worse Independent, you’re gonna have problems.

When I was Baptist I remember couple of single girls in the church had, what some jokingly called a “dating ministry”. They would date “unsaved” guys and entice them to become Christians. Many guys would rush to “pray a sinner’s prayer” for a pretty pair of legs.
Not saying that is the situation here, but I would be careful.
 
Your choice depends on what is more important to you, a wife or religion.
That is where it is leading to.
It is easier to make that decision now than later.
Samual or Samson?
In what direction do you think the Holy Spirit is leading you?
 
Barbkw said:
He loves her and foresees her as a possible lifelong partner. You don’t think a Baptist women would have great difficulty raising his children Catholic?
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:rotfl:

Possible lifelong partner? Where’d you get that?

He said he likes her, she’s “nice” and he thinks he might be “falling for her.”

Sounds like a crush - at best.

OP - If she’s your only real friend at school, I wouldn’t cut her off just because she isn’t Catholic. You aren’t even Catholic yet.

But if that’s where you see yourself in the future, before you find yourself getting serious with someone, know that it’s ALWAYS best if they share your faith. Baptists and Catholics have lots of theological differences and you’d have a very hard time reconciling those two faiths.
 
My wife is Baptist.

My grandfather was Catholic, my grandmother Baptist. He never missed mass, she never missed Church. They were married 69 years.

It can work.
 
yellowbird said:
:rotfl:

Possible lifelong partner? Where’d you get that?

He said he likes her, she’s “nice” and he thinks he might be “falling for her.”

Sounds like a crush - at best.
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AlainVanille’s profile says that he is a university student.

Your comments seem to assume that AlainVanille is in grade school.
 
As someone who has looked at this very question from the other direction, I would recommend caution. Before you pursue a romantic relationship with this girl, you need to understand Baptist doctrine in general and how her local church lives out that doctrine. Only then can you really make a good decision about whether or not to pursue this girl. It’s likely that neither her nor you actually understands each others faith very well. Baptists don’t spend time learning Catholic doctrine or teachings, and Catholics often don’t understand Baptist doctrine. At least that has been my experience on this forum.

If you’re serious about becoming an obedient Catholic, what you will probably find is that the two faith traditions are too far apart to make a relationship work without great effort. While we have the basics in common, the implementation and understanding of the faith is very different for each faith tradition.

The very best advice I can offer is to pray about the issue and seek the guidance of a priest and to pray for guidance.
 
My grandfather was a Roman Catholic from Algiers, Louisiana. My grandmother was a Baptist from Amite County, Mississippi.

They got married in about 1928 - it worked out for them.

I say, let the young people find one another and have a little optimism. 🙂
 
AlainVanille said:
She is nice and in my school is probably the only person to actually care about me, and beyond the superficial as well (in other words, someone who is actually sensitive to my feelings).

Long story short, I think I’m falling for her.
There’s just one problem though (not saying that what she is is a problem itself) - she’s a Baptist and does not believe in Catholic.

I can’t really think straight (for now)… What should I do?
Can I still join her to see her ‘Church’? Or partake in their upcoming Christmas celebrations? If I were to do so, would it be a sin on my part? Since I would do it knwoingly and willingly.

I’m not much into religion actually as long as I know someone truly has faith in God, I pray that we will all be reunited once again. But nevertheless, I cannot deny that religion has become so much a part of our lives that there will always be something up with it.

I thank you for your comments and suggestions, advice and help.
I’m just saying this… I hope whatever it is, only God knows what is best for us all.
Click to expand...
I was once a staunch militant atheist. This girl had said she would never date an atheist because of her past with one. What happened? We dated and look at me now. Haha…

I am not saying to do it, nor am I saying not to. There may be a reason for your befriending her. I don’t know.
From a person usually on the rejected-due-to-beliefs side, I would say go for it. It does not matter that she believes differently (to an extent).

If you are friends with her and have a foundation of care and trust, perhaps God is calling it to the next level. But you should not make the decision based solely on religion. That is very hurtful. I was rejected by a girl who really liked me and wanted a relationship with me, but I was atheist. Same with a Southern Baptist Liberty University graduate. She liked me until she found out I was Catholic. She said, “I will never marry a Catholic” and cut off anything good we had.

I say there is no harm in trying. Don’t pre-judge before you try.

But as far as the attending Baptist ceremonies, I think it is fine as long as you attend the days of obligation and Sunday Mass and such. I play trumpet at various churches. I see no problem with that. You learn a lot. You may want to ask somebody more knowledgeable than me on that though, but I see no problems with it.

Lastly, since you are obviously willing to check out her place of worship, see if she is willing to check out yours. If not,just leave it at that and do your Catholic thing with or without her. Lead by example. She will eventually tell you one Sunday, “Hey, can I go with you this time?”

“Preach the Gospel always; use words if necessary.” ~ St. Francis of Assissi (I think it was him.)
 
TexanKnight said:
My wife is Baptist.

My grandfather was Catholic, my grandmother Baptist. He never missed mass, she never missed Church. They were married 69 years.

It can work.
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Yes and your GP’s are proof and I’m throughly happy for you and them.

But still, I’ve been married quit a long time. My wife criticises me and that is just
marriage and I just offer it up most of the time. I’m sure she feels the same about me.
But I must say, that if we were not of the same faith, we would not be the same people we
have become over the years in one faith. And I’m sure something important would have
been missing that we shared together all this time. I believe that faith is the biggest
factor in a marriage for many reasons, number one being, all the family sharing Christ
in unison with no division. “all things become possible”

To give you one example, she is the one who suggested Eucharistic adoration. One of the nicest things we have ever done. I’m the one suggesting the rosary. I encourage some of the women’s activities in the parish as well as the retreats she goes on.
She is the one sho suggests that we pray together for members in the family, especially
to make novenas for them. At other times in discussion of various topics, we share the
Catholic viewpoint and support one another. She is thoughtful about giving clothes, food, and other items to the poor at the parish, and I’m glad she does for I’m a guy and you
know how guys are thoughtless. I forget holydays and she reminds me so I don’t miss
them. Shall I go on? Mariage is so much easier, holier, and better with one faith.
It may be workable in some instances with different faiths, but not as together in so many ways.

It is important who you date, for someday one of them will become your spouse.
And I need to add, pray to Jesus for a good one every day of your life until you meet one
that you don’t know whether to kiss or pray to.

Just a thought.
 
AlainVanille said:
She is nice and in my school is probably the only person to actually care about me, and beyond the superficial as well (in other words, someone who is actually sensitive to my feelings).

Long story short, I think I’m falling for her.
There’s just one problem though (not saying that what she is is a problem itself) - she’s a Baptist and does not believe in Catholic.

I can’t really think straight (for now)… What should I do?
Can I still join her to see her ‘Church’? Or partake in their upcoming Christmas celebrations? If I were to do so, would it be a sin on my part? Since I would do it knwoingly and willingly.

I’m not much into religion actually as long as I know someone truly has faith in God, I pray that we will all be reunited once again. But nevertheless, I cannot deny that religion has become so much a part of our lives that there will always be something up with it.

I thank you for your comments and suggestions, advice and help.
I’m just saying this… I hope whatever it is, only God knows what is best for us all.
Click to expand...
Many on this board seem to have you already marrying this girl, or for that matter, close to marrying her. You say she is nice and cares about your feelings. That’s great! Ask her out on a date and see how it goes.

Having said that, you should educate yourself on the differences between Baptists and Catholics. I would suggest Catholicism and Fundamentalism by Karl Keating.
 
Just one thing. If you happen to be with her on one of the rare “Lord’s Supper” sundays and you are serious about Catholicism do not eat the bread and grape juice.

Sounds easy, but they pass the B&GJ right where you are seated and you will have to handle the trays at least.
 
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