Help! My Boyfriend Doubts His Faith

[Sara_Balzano]

My current boyfriend has told me that the only reason why he is a Catholic is because it is part of his Maltese identity. When I asked if he really believed in the Holy Trinity, he said he really did not. What should I do?

 

[Joshua_Shorter]

Pray for him everyday. If it was me, I would offer up a daily rosary for him. I offer up one for my girlfriend and our relationship concerning whatever issue we are facing that day.

At some point, everyone has to accept their own faith. Sometimes, it is difficult. Continue to support him, as long as you can. Provide a loving, supportive environment for him to comfortably discuss his issues. Read up and study up on your own faith. It is important to make sure that you are strong in your faith. Partake in the sacrements and adoration as often as possible.

Also, this was a big one for me as I was starting my conversion process. I wanted to know that my girlfriend (I did not convert for her) was praying for me to convert as a friend or just another human, not simply because I was her boyfriend and she wanted to marry a Catholic.

I am praying for you.

 

[ndeparis88]

Praying of course is top. You know it’s good to show what your doing in order for him to be helped in his Faith. Being that witness on how right it is, show him you are doing this because you care about him. Also show him books, that talk about the Faith there are a ton that can help Men in their faith. Like Be a Man by Father Larry Richards. Also Farther Robert Barrons Word on Fire.

 

[Trebor135]

My current boyfriend has told me that the only reason why he is a Catholic is because it is part of his Maltese identity. When I asked if he really believed in the Holy Trinity, he said he really did not. What should I do?

I second post #2. I also strongly recommend this page and the series linked from it, which should give you some good ideas to defend the Christian faith. (The author writes from an evangelical Protestant perspective, but he doesn’t discuss the question of denominations let alone such issues as the sacraments, so the work is accessible to Catholics and Orthodox too.) There’s a lot of material there, but it’s worth the read over the course of a few days or a week.

 

[SilverLight]

My current boyfriend has told me that the only reason why he is a Catholic is because it is part of his Maltese identity. When I asked if he really believed in the Holy Trinity, he said he really did not. What should I do?

That’s his choice to make in life.

 

[twoangels]

My current boyfriend has told me that the only reason why he is a Catholic is because it is part of his Maltese identity. When I asked if he really believed in the Holy Trinity, he said he really did not. What should I do?

Pray for him. Take this knowledge into your discernment process. In the end it is for you to discern how important it is that your future husband is a practicing Catholic. If you find its very important, than you know what to do.

 

[Trebor135]

That’s his choice to make in life.

Indeed. But if the OP can exercise some positive influence on her boyfriend by, for example, answering some of his questions, we should be all in favour of the OP taking action to make this possible.

 

[PennyinCanada]

I don’t know how old you are but you are at an age to really get a good handle on your faith. What you learned when you were 10 regarding the faith isn’t at a level that a young adult can handle. Just like math. lol You can pray for him and ask others to pray for him. Know that a man of faith can love more, sacrifice more, can grow with you as you go through stuff in life together. A man of faith can pray for you as you finish school (are you still in school?) and make decisions that will affect the course of the rest of your life. What a critical time for you!

I am so sorry that he’s lost his faith. Know that there are people who have been faithful in praying the Rosary for decades (years, and decades if the rosary! ) as our Lady of Fatima requested, for the conversion of sinners and peace in this world. His conversion may come, but it might take decades.

Coming to an age where you have to make decisions for the rest of your life is very exciting! Hang on to God so He can guide you and help you navigate around the land mines of life. God bless and have a beautiful Easter.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

My current boyfriend has told me that the only reason why he is a Catholic is because it is part of his Maltese identity. When I asked if he really believed in the Holy Trinity, he said he really did not. What should I do?

Break up with him. But pray for him too. Nothing good will come of continuing to bond with someone who doesn’t share your faith. Discernment tells you this one = not a good choice.

 

[Sara_Balzano]

I don’t know how old you are but you are at an age to really get a good handle on your faith. What you learned when you were 10 regarding the faith isn’t at a level that a young adult can handle. Just like math. lol You can pray for him and ask others to pray for him. Know that a man of faith can love more, sacrifice more, can grow with you as you go through stuff in life together. A man of faith can pray for you as you finish school (are you still in school?) and make decisions that will affect the course of the rest of your life. What a critical time for you!

I am so sorry that he’s lost his faith. Know that there are people who have been faithful in praying the Rosary for decades (years, and decades if the rosary! ) as our Lady of Fatima requested, for the conversion of sinners and peace in this world. His conversion may come, but it might take decades.

Coming to an age where you have to make decisions for the rest of your life is very exciting! Hang on to God so He can guide you and help you navigate around the land mines of life. God bless and have a beautiful Easter.

I’m twenty-four.

I have told him to pray the Rosary many time. He tells me that he does, but I think he’s lying to me and telling only what I want to hear. I have not brought up the request of Our Lady of Fatima, but I might do so.

 

[SilverLight]

I’m twenty-four.

I have told him to pray the Rosary many time. He tells me that he does, but I think he’s lying to me and telling only what I want to hear. I have not brought up the request of Our Lady of Fatima, but I might do so.

Do you keep asking him? If so he may just want to avoid a fight.
That’s just a scenario.
He also might be telling the truth you never know.
The next chance you get ask him to sit down and you can talk about it.
Religion is a choice and if people can agree on one thing that’s great.

 

[He_Man]

Do you keep asking him? If so he may just want to avoid a fight.
That’s just a scenario.
He also might be telling the truth you never know.
The next chance you get ask him to sit down and you can talk about it.
Religion is a choice and if people can agree on one thing that’s great.

This isn’t baseball. This is religious identity, which is lies at the core of a marriage. Child rearing, life choices - all flow from our core religious values. Yes, it is his choice, but the OP has a choice of whether or not there can be a future with someone who may lack such a fundamental belief.

My wife and I are different. She is more spontaneous, less financially conscious, but frankly, more honest and better at sharing her feelings than i am. Those are all things we can work on. They don’t have the capacity (unless left unfettered) to cripple a relationship like sharing common religious and moral beliefs.

 

[SilverLight]

This isn’t baseball. This is religious identity, which is lies at the core of a marriage. Child rearing, life choices - all flow from our core religious values. Yes, it is his choice, but the OP has a choice of whether or not there can be a future with someone who may lack such a fundamental belief.

My wife and I are different. She is more spontaneous, less financially conscious, but frankly, more honest and better at sharing her feelings than i am. Those are all things we can work on. They don’t have the capacity (unless left unfettered) to cripple a relationship like sharing common religious and moral beliefs.

my mom is roman catholic my dad is presbiterian and I was raised on good values.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

my mom is roman catholic my dad is presbiterian and I was raised on good values.

The OP said her boyfriend does not believe in the Trinity. That’s a pretty serious difference, not one anyone should ignore.

Were you raised in the Catholic Church? Did you get all your sacraments? If so, great. But a lot of mixed-faith marriages don’t work out as well. Your parents are both Christians, at least they have many beliefs that are the same.

Not believing in the Trinity may mean this young man doesn’t believe in God. Therefore, anyone whose faith is important to her will be advised to let go of him. Doing missionary work and trying to convince someone that God is real is not advisable.

 

[FaithByProxy]

Do you keep asking him? If so he may just want to avoid a fight.
That’s just a scenario.
He also might be telling the truth you never know.
The next chance you get ask him to sit down and you can talk about it.
Religion is a choice and if people can agree on one thing that’s great.

I’m sorry, but are you Catholic?

This woman is concerned because a man that she deeply cares for is struggling with his faith. This is normal. Trying to help a fellow Catholic in a time of spiritual confusion is what every Catholic should do.

Have you heard of the Works of Mercy?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Works_of_Mercy

Under “Spiritual Works of Mercy” are these two, the first and most important of the two:

1: Instruct the uninformed
2: Counsel the doubtful

So no, you do not sit idly by while the spiritual lives of the people you love fall into decay. That would be immoral.

 

[SilverLight]

I’m sorry, but are you Catholic?

This woman is concerned because a man that she deeply cares for is struggling with his faith. This is normal. Trying to help a fellow Catholic in a time of spiritual confusion is what every Catholic should do.

Have you heard of the Works of Mercy?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Works_of_Mercy

Under “Spiritual Works of Mercy” are these two, the first and most important of the two:

1: Instruct the uninformed
2: Counsel the doubtful

So no, you do not sit idly by while the spiritual lives of the people you love fall into decay. That would be immoral.

im roman catholic and my relationship with god is my own I was just saying ok I see nothing wrong with that at all and if you do im sorry.

 

[FaithByProxy]

im roman catholic and my relationship with god is my own I was just saying ok I see nothing wrong with that at all and if you do im sorry.

I’m sorry if I was overly harsh – but I run into this attitude quite a bit, and it is dangerous. I see that you come from a mixed religious background, and that’s fine. However, one of the basics of Christianity is belief in the Trinity, and that goes for any branch of Christianity. You technically cannot be Christian if you do not believe in the Trinity. That is why baptisims in the Morman church are not recognized by the Catholic church.

 

[SilverLight]

I’m sorry if I was overly harsh – but I run into this attitude quite a bit, and it is dangerous. I see that you come from a mixed religious background, and that’s fine. However, one of the basics of Christianity is belief in the Trinity, and that goes for any branch of Christianity. You technically cannot be Christian if you do not believe in the Trinity. That is why baptisims in the Morman church are not recognized by the Catholic church.

I believe in the father, sun and holy spirit yes you seem to jump to conlusion there for a moment and its ok.

 

[FaithByProxy]

I believe in the father, sun and holy spirit yes you seem to jump to conlusion there for a moment and its ok.

I never implied that you did not believe in the Trinity. However, the OP’s boyfriend obviously does not, and that is a pretty big issue.

 

[SilverLight]

I never implied that you did not believe in the Trinity. However, the OP’s boyfriend obviously does not, and that is a pretty big issue.

ok I was saying that perhaps he was scared he might be judged by the other if he said no I have felt this fear myself not because of religion but from other things and its terible.