Homosexuality and RCIA

[FaithBuild18]

One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He’s also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is “This could be a step toward healing,” but then I’m also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don’t want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very “culturally hip” and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he’d end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?

 

[cradlecatholic5]

I think you do just what we all do for people coming into our Catholic … pray for them. No difference.

 

[Stumblesalot]

One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He’s also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is “This could be a step toward healing,” but then I’m also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don’t want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very “culturally hip” and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he’d end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?

Hi,

I would suggest also that you pray for your friends. It does sound, however, as if you friend who is acting as sponsor may be providing misleading advice and presenting a poor example to your other friend. The fact that he is acting in a promiscuous fashion, and justifying it to both himself and RCIA candidate, suggests three possible scenarios to me.
1)His hormones are on overdrive and, while in his heart he knows such behaviour is unacceptable, he is succumbing to temptation.
2)He does not truly understand the moral implications and duties associated with his faith.
3)He is adopting a somewhat ‘lukewarm attitude’ toward his faith and is consequently guilty of the sin of presumption (i.e. “oh well, I shouldn’t really sleep with this girl, but it’s OK because I can just go to confession at the weekend” etc.)

In any case, a lot of such attitudes change drastically with age and life experience. In today’s world it is very difficult to be a young person of faith. I would perhaps, if the subject of faith comes up one evening when you are having a “lad’s night in”, maybe gently try to steer them in a more appropriate direction. In any case, simply pray for them and leave the rest to God. Hope this was helpful.

God bless

 

[sw85]

One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He’s also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is “This could be a step toward healing,” but then I’m also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don’t want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very “culturally hip” and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he’d end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?

Given the terrible state of catechesis in this country it is very likely that your friend will never be told that homosexuality is against the teachings of the Church. It may well fall on you to correct this, if you are close enough to him that doing so wouldn’t be presumptuous.

My concern is mainly that your friend, by confessing faith in the Church while practicing homosexuality, would receive the body of Christ unworthily, and so profane it.

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He’s also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is “This could be a step toward healing,” but then I’m also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don’t want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very “culturally hip” and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he’d end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?

You need a long talk with the sponsor.

Perhaps you should buy the pair a Catechism since that has pretty much everything

 

[Havard]

What exactly do you mean when you say he’s open/proud? Are you certain he’s opposed to chastity?

 

[HaveCourage]

One of my roommates is openly gay and proud. He’s also in the RCIA program at the local Catholic Church. Is this a step in the right direction, or is it a misdirected step?

My immediate thought is “This could be a step toward healing,” but then I’m also worried about any misconceptions he might have about the faith. His sponsor is one of my other roommates. I don’t want to sound judgemental, but simply as a matter of fact without judging the intentions, both party and drink A LOT, are very “culturally hip” and the non-gay one is kind of promiscuous with the ladies. I worry about what he may be telling the RCIA candidate about our Catholic faith. Then again, maybe joining the Church is the only way he’d end up seeing the truth of his actions. What am I supposed to think/do? Do I just ignore it?

I would say it is a misdirected step, for if he is “gay and proud”, then he is first identifying as a homosexual person, above the identity of being a child of God. For that reason, RCIA is not the journey to healing. An examination of identity is the first step for him.

What do you do? Ask him if he is ready and willing to self-identify as a child of God first, instead of a homosexual person.
That is, if he is authentic in his journey, he will freely want to identify as a child of God FIRST, out of his love for Christ (above self). If he loves himself more than he loves God, then he will center his identity not on the designer of his soul, but only on a facet of his humanness (sexuality).
For a further explanation, PLEASE listen to my own testimony -
youtube.com/watch?v=uEH6iau7wkM

Please share it with other people who are committed to the faith, although this is possibly not what your roomie pal needs to hear at this time. But you do need to challenge him on the matter of identity.
He has the choice to identify as a “child of God, with homosexual attraction”, which places his identity in Christ, while at the same time, not denying the reality of his attractions.

God Bless and PRAY PRAY PRAY

 

[Corpus_Cristi]

I think you do just what we all do for people coming into our Catholic … pray for them. No difference.

This.

 

[ssa_fellow]

I would say it is a misdirected step, for if he is “gay and proud”, then he is first identifying as a homosexual person, above the identity of being a child of God. For that reason, RCIA is not the journey to healing. An examination of identity is the first step for him.

God Bless and PRAY PRAY PRAY

Have you broached this topic with either of your 2 roommates yet?

If you haven’t, I’d suggest telling whoever is leading the RCIA classes. They’ll probably know how to deal with it. If they don’t want to individually confront him about it, then maybe they can just include the Church’s teaching at some point in RCIA. Also… isn’t RCIA ending soon?
If you feel this person isn’t ready to be Confirmed then definitely make your concerns known to your priest!!!

When people join the Catholic Church the idea is they have a good understanding of what the Church teaches and agree with the teachings. That’s why Vatican II brought RCIA back from antiquity. Certainly you can join the Church and disagree with something if your attitude is that you’ll try to conform to whatever teaching over time. Many Protestants have said they still had hangups about _____, but didn’t let that stop them from converting. It would be wrong to enter into the Church with a hard heart or obstinately “I disagree with this Church teaching, and I will NEVER change my belief, I think the Church is wrong on this”. As opposed to “Even though I don’t agree on this issue, maybe I’ll understand the Catholic teaching after prayer and being Confrimed, asking a priest, etc.”

All that being said, we are all called to identify as children/ servants of God first like Paul did. Even a heterosexual shouldn’t say: Well I’m proud to be straight, and also I’m Catholic.

We should all say “I’m proud to be Catholic”, and if you’re SSA you could say “I’m Catholic, gay and committed to celibacy, and proud of it”

 

[michelleds]

You’ve gotten good advice so far. You’re the only one who knows your relationship with (1) the catechist; (2) the sponsor; and (3) your priest.

This close to Easter, I’d be calling for an appointment with my priest about this situation.

 

[FaithBuild18]

Thank you everyone for your responses. I think I’m going to try to talk to the sponsor first, since I know him better. I’m pretty nervous. I don’t talk a lot so I will be out of my comfort zone.

 

[VanWA]

**Healing? He’s not sick, he’s as God made him.

The bible is FULL of contradictions, but Christ’s words are not. Ignore the mistranslations of the OT and ask yourself this: Who would CHOOSE to be a persecuted minority?**

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

**Healing? He’s not sick, he’s as God made him.

The bible is FULL of contradictions, but Christ’s words are not. Ignore the mistranslations of the OT and ask yourself this: Who would CHOOSE to be a persecuted minority?**

All inherently sterile acts are intrinsically disordered. It doesn’t make him a bad person, it doesn’t make him a broken person (anymore than we all are), but it does mean that his attractions are disordered insofar as all desires for acts intrinsically closed to life are disordered.

 

[VanWA]

All inherently sterile acts are intrinsically disordered. It doesn’t make him a bad person, it doesn’t make him a broken person (anymore than we all are), but it does mean that his attractions are disordered insofar as all desires for acts intrinsically closed to life are disordered.

 

[VanWA]

All inherently sterile acts are intrinsically disordered. It doesn’t make him a bad person, it doesn’t make him a broken person (anymore than we all are), but it does mean that his attractions are disordered insofar as all desires for acts intrinsically closed to life are disordered.

It’s nothing but a biological function. The male body does not tolerate a buildup of semen, so discharge, whether voluntary (masturbation) or involuntary as in ‘wet dreams,’ is going to happen, just like women’s menstrual cycles. And if God has seen fit to have many of us alone and lonely, then it’s all the more likely. The sin of lust is done long before any sort of physiological response, that’s in the mind.

 

[HaveCourage]

Have you broached this topic with either of your 2 roommates yet?

If you haven’t, I’d suggest telling whoever is leading the RCIA classes. They’ll probably know how to deal with it. If they don’t want to individually confront him about it, then maybe they can just include the Church’s teaching at some point in RCIA. Also… isn’t RCIA ending soon?
If you feel this person isn’t ready to be Confirmed then definitely make your concerns known to your priest!!!

When people join the Catholic Church the idea is they have a good understanding of what the Church teaches and agree with the teachings. That’s why Vatican II brought RCIA back from antiquity. Certainly you can join the Church and disagree with something if your attitude is that you’ll try to conform to whatever teaching over time. Many Protestants have said they still had hangups about _____, but didn’t let that stop them from converting. It would be wrong to enter into the Church with a hard heart or obstinately “I disagree with this Church teaching, and I will NEVER change my belief, I think the Church is wrong on this”. As opposed to “Even though I don’t agree on this issue, maybe I’ll understand the Catholic teaching after prayer and being Confrimed, asking a priest, etc.”

All that being said, we are all called to identify as children/ servants of God first like Paul did. Even a heterosexual shouldn’t say: Well I’m proud to be straight, and also I’m Catholic.

We should all say “I’m proud to be Catholic”, and if you’re SSA you could say “I’m Catholic, gay and committed to celibacy, and proud of it”

You still have to be careful! You are not clarifying the use of the word Gay when you used it.
Saying “gay people” embeds a huge flaw (an error). You do not define whether a person is homosexually attracted, or has subscribed to the gay life-identity. One is no choice, and one is choice. If you use the word “gay” in an unclarified sense, you are contributing to the continued misunderstanding of the whole topic. The words “homosexual”, “gay”, “lesbian”, and so forth, can never be used alone without further clarifiers, for they confuse two contradictory items; choice and NOT choice.

Regardless, I am glad for all SSA people who come to love the Lord FIRST above all else (for it draws them to identify with the Lord first too).

 

[HaveCourage]

**Healing? He’s not sick, he’s as God made him.

The bible is FULL of contradictions, but Christ’s words are not. Ignore the mistranslations of the OT and ask yourself this: Who would CHOOSE to be a persecuted minority?**

Every person who has been brainwashed to believe that their UNchosen sexual attractions defines their life identity (which is a matter of choice, for it is how one defines themselves), will “choose” this persecuted minority. They will “choose” it because they are not given any other options (such as being able to identify as a child of God with homosexual attraction). Secondly, “choose” is in quotation marks because they are not given the respect they deserve as human beings to become aware that they do in fact have free will to choose how they shall define themsevles.

Thidly, it’s a thin line about who is the persecuted minority. Spend 5 minutes on youtube and look at the hate comments posted on anyone who stands up for “traditional mariage”, relative to one who stands of for “gay marriage”.

Bottom line, people CHOOSE to be what you call a persecuted minority, because the world tells them they have no other choice but to embrace that identity, otherwise they will be lying to themselves, which is one of the biggest falsehoods that this millenium has ever seen. Anyone who has or who has had SSA knows first hand the joy of accepting their circumstances (coming out and being honest with themselves), but then choosing Christ first in their lives. People who don’t CHOOSE to identify with the Lord FIRST, are not at liberty to even discuss how real or unreal they believe that freedon and joy is, for it is something they choose to not come to know themselves.

It’s a windy road of deception, so here is the Catholic difference: The CC invites the fullness of critical thought, others do not. The end.

 

[Elizabeth502]

Given the terrible state of catechesis in this country it is very likely that your friend will never be told that homosexuality is against the teachings of the Church.

Or, it is equally likely that he will be told that it is indeed against official teaching, but that his conscience supersedes official teaching.

It is also equally likely that he will be told that as long as he locates a partner with whom he can be “committed and monogamous,” the Church – or members in it – approve of his homosexual relationship as a special exception to traditional marriage and to homosexual acts, being that supposedly such a relationship mimics those aspects of marriage.

Why do I raise the third possibility? Because there are CAF members who seriously believe that (have shared that publicly), and some of them hold positions of responsibility in their parishes, and have been or will be catechists themselves.

 

[VanWA]

Every person who has been brainwashed to believe that their UNchosen sexual attractions defines their life identity (which is a matter of choice, for it is how one defines themselves), will “choose” this persecuted minority. They will “choose” it because they are not given any other options (such as being able to identify as a child of God with homosexual attraction). Secondly, “choose” is in quotation marks because they are not given the respect they deserve as human beings to become aware that they do in fact have free will to choose how they shall define themsevles.

Thidly, it’s a thin line about who is the persecuted minority. Spend 5 minutes on youtube and look at the hate comments posted on anyone who stands up for “traditional mariage”, relative to one who stands of for “gay marriage”.

Bottom line, people CHOOSE to be what you call a persecuted minority, because the world tells them they have no other choice but to embrace that identity, otherwise they will be lying to themselves, which is one of the biggest falsehoods that this millenium has ever seen. Anyone who has or who has had SSA knows first hand the joy of accepting their circumstances (coming out and being honest with themselves), but then choosing Christ first in their lives. People who don’t CHOOSE to identify with the Lord FIRST, are not at liberty to even discuss how real or unreal they believe that freedon and joy is, for it is something they choose to not come to know themselves.

It’s a windy road of deception, so here is the Catholic difference: The CC invites the fullness of critical thought, others do not. The end.

Wrong. NO one chooses pain and suffering over joy and love. Give it up!!

 

[VanWA]

Or, it is equally likely that he will be told that it is indeed against official teaching, but that his conscience supersedes official teaching.

It is also equally likely that he will be told that as long as he locates a partner with whom he can be “committed and monogamous,” the Church – or members in it – approve of his homosexual relationship as a special exception to traditional marriage and to homosexual acts, being that supposedly such a relationship mimics those aspects of marriage.

Why do I raise the third possibility? Because there are CAF members who seriously believe that (have shared that publicly), and some of them hold positions of responsibility in their parishes, and have been or will be catechists themselves.

NO one should care if some body, religious or otherwise, ‘approves’ of how God made them or not. The ‘church’ is full of mistakes and abuses, and the people in it are most often just as bad. No one should be judging others anyway, esp. if they have no idea what it’s like to be so ‘ordained’ by God.