Homosexuality is learned.

[meltzerboy]

Ask that question to the field of psychology and the media at large who contend that we are only sexual beings. I contend that we are spiritual beings, fist and foremost.

Psychology has made some inroads into the field of spirituality and religion, mainly in the areas of psychology of religion, health psychology, and positive psychology. But you’re right that spirituality is certainly not a dominant theme overall. As to the media, I agree with you that there is an overemphasis on sexuality. We may be spiritual beings first and foremost, as you say, but I don’t think we should completely neglect or ignore the other aspects of our biological and psychological nature.

 

[LisaA]

There is no conclusive evidence for any cause.

That’s because as small children they have no idea what sex or marriage is, you could have puberty activating things that were already in place, but not yet active.

I can only assume you are talking about Afghanistan.

That is an assumption with no serious evidence to support it.

Have you ever considered that they had marriages because they tried to be straight? I know one who was courting a woman, but broke it off because he felt it was cruel and unfair to her to marry her because he could never truly love her.

A) Thus homosexuality COULD be a learned behavior
B) Agreed that small children do not understand the nuances of sex and marriage but they do understand what they see…that is normal husband and wife pair bonds. Puberty changes their secondary sex characteristics and brain chemistry but there is no evidence that the seeds of homosexualty were sown genetially prior to its onset
C) Yes Afghanistan but other tribal areas with Islamic values reign as well
D) So you don’t believe that society, the media, culture or other stimuli have a strong impact on sexual practices? REALLY?
E) Sure that is one reason. But I know enough homosexuals intimately enough to hear about their progression from hetero to homosexuality. As I said, of the homosexual friends I’ve known well, only one said he had NO interest in women ever. In fact he said he found female bodies repulsive even during puberty and adolescence. The others said they had very normal attraction to females, normal dating life, normal sexual activity with females. They also became sexually interested in men and those who were in the position to experiment did so. Some continued to maintain their marriages and families with occasional forays into the homosexual culture. Others left their families, churches, and former lives to enter into a relationship with a man.

As I said, sexuality is a continuum. People have tendencies one way or the other. Some because of certain experiences change. I do think modern culture with its freakish devotion to “authenticity” encourages deviant behavior of many kinds. Once the brain becomes trained to respond to certain stimuli and with society’s agreement it is not that difficult to transition into a different mode whether it’s homosexuality, adultery, porn or self stimulation.

Lisa

 

[markeverett49]

That doesn’t make sense to me Robert. Why would a non-homosexual be tempted by others of the same gender? To be tempted requires that temptation to be attractive, which it just wouldn’t be unless we already had attraction to the same sex…

This cuts both ways: many adult homosexuals have said they had girlfriends in school. They were attracted to them. But that aside, what people find tempting can change. (Many adults desire sexual acts a description of which would have traumatized them as children.)

I’ve been told at least ten times by a gay person that “I knew since I was five” (-or four, or six, but the number is always less than seven). When I ask what this means exactly----I find the awareness of sexual orientation so far before puberty confusing— they invariably change the subject. I asked a former Jesuit who became a psychologist about this. (He wasn’t gay but was telling me of a gay priest he had known for decades and mentioned the priest and told him he ‘always knew.’ When I said I don’t know what it means to know what one’s sexual orientation is so far before puberty, he got a funny look on his face and said, “You know what? I don’t either! When you think about it, it doesn’t make sense.”)

I have never heard a heterosexual claim to have known at that age; indeed, most heterosexuals at that age prefer the company of other boys and think girls have “cooties.”

 

[Elizabeth502]

This cuts both ways: many adult homosexuals have said they had girlfriends in school. They were attracted to them. But that aside, what people find tempting can change. (Many adults desire sexual acts a description of which would have traumatized them as children.)

I’ve been told at least ten times by a gay person that “I knew since I was five” (-or four, or six, but the number is always less than seven). When I ask what this means exactly----I find the awareness of sexual orientation so far before puberty confusing— they invariably change the subject. I asked a former Jesuit who became a psychologist about this. (He wasn’t gay but was telling me of a gay priest he had known for decades and mentioned the priest and told him he ‘always knew.’ When I said I don’t know what it means to know what one’s sexual orientation is so far before puberty, he got a funny look on his face and said, “You know what? I don’t either! When you think about it, it doesn’t make sense.”)

I have never heard a heterosexual claim to have known at that age; indeed, most heterosexuals at that age prefer the company of other boys and think girls have “cooties.”

Absolutely, Mark. The “I always knew” is part of the propaganda. It violates the dynamic of learned sexuality, which is a process over time, as any authoritative, well-trained psychologist will attest to. The very experimentation with gender roles, the repulsion and attraction volatility between the sexes, up until easily age 11-12, is part of the fluidity of human sexuality. It is not believable that homosexuals are, in this respect, a different sub-species of human being.

 

[CopticChristian]

This cuts both ways: many adult homosexuals have said they had girlfriends in school. They were attracted to them. But that aside, what people find tempting can change. (Many adults desire sexual acts a description of which would have traumatized them as children.)
I asked a former Jesuit who became a psychologist about this. (He wasn’t gay but was telling me of a gay priest he had known for decades and mentioned the priest and told him he ‘always knew.’ When I said I don’t know what it means to know what one’s sexual orientation is so far before puberty, he got a funny look on his face and said, “You know what? I don’t either! When you think about it, it doesn’t make sense.”)

I have never heard a heterosexual claim to have known at that age; indeed, most heterosexuals at that age prefer the company of other boys and think girls have “cooties.”

Mark,

I’ve been told at least ten times by a gay person that “I knew since I was five” (-or four, or six, but the number is always less than seven). When I ask what this means exactly----I find the awareness of sexual orientation so far before puberty confusing— they invariably change the subject.

Then they have not read Shame and Attachment that outlines the dynamics of parents and babies as it regards to forming the reparative process that those that recall at 5, have no recollection of what happened prior to 5.

 

[Edward_H]

I think we’d do we’ll to remember, especially with this topic, that love is not a feeling. We don’t fall in love.

Real love is the work we’re willing to do within us to please God and serve others.

These “internal projects” might be to put our selfishness away, to stop being pushed around by our senses, emotions, bodies. To increase our spirit of generosity, to conquer daily a certain laziness, to face reality with more sincerity, rather than through a cloud of excuses.

All of this internal work is done for the love of God, to correspond to His will, not ours…making ourselves “more” so we can serve others.

 

[silentfactor80]

I guess I still do not understand your point. We are genetically hardwired differently. Yes men get oxytocin from sex but they do not get the ‘bonding’ feeling in the same way as women. Your homonal reaction and response is different. To bring this back to the thread, male homosexuals tend to promiscuity, even those in committed and longterm partnerships. I got to know a homosexual pair, one of whom was a psychiatrist who talked to me at length about this issue. He said for men sex can be bonding but sex is also simply a physical release…like a good meal perhaps? In the male homosexual culture this was one of the reasons AIDS spread so swiftly. “Patient Zero” for example was responsible for literally thousands of cases of AIDS as he was a flight attendent who engaged in a lot of casual bathhouse sex. Read some of the books about this culture particularly before the time that AIDS transmission was understood (The Band Played On is outstanding and indepth). Back to my psychiatrist friend, he said that many homosexuals continued to engage in casual sex even after setting up housekeeping or even getting married. You do NOT see this behavior among Lesbians at even close to the same rate.

As to fear of pregnancy, are you kidding? Birth control is available EVERYWHERE, and particularly at colleges where the hook up culture is promulgated. This is not 1952! I think you need to realize that women don’t do the casual sex thing because that is not the way we are made. Yes there are promiscuous women and I suspect it’s more an enjoyment of power or need to feel “loved.” But from the beginning of time women have been the ones putting the brakes on sexual libertinism.

Oh and it is NOT harder for women to get aroused. They are not so visual as are men but with the right stimuli, the response is as instant as in males and also they can achieve orgasm just as speedily if not more so.

Lisa

What you say is not supported by science at all. Oxytocin IS the bonding chemical so if guys have we bond. Case closed. The reason why women seem to bond stronger is because of a learned feeling of vulnerability. We teach women to think and act like helpless little flowers so they want a big strong male to protect them. Women don’t bond with men because they love us. They bond to feel safe.

Male’s spread AIDS more easily because of the type of sex homosexuals have. Even if women were being promiscuous they are less likely to spread AIDS because the amount of fluid a women produces in minor and unless one has a cut in the skin HIV is not as easily transferred. Homosexual men though tend to get rough which leads to tearing and hence increased likelihood of HIV.

Women put the breaks on sex because of the pregnancy issue!!! Raising kids is hard work and women do most of it. You don’t need a degree to figure that out. Guys may not need to feel “loved” but we do need to feel RESPECTED. When a woman wants to be intimate with a man that is a HUGE honor. I am quite sure if women found other ways to honor guys we wouldn’t be a buzzed about sex. If all guys needed was a release then to be honest we don’t need another person. We can release by ourselves easily and without troubling anybody. You friend is talking his opinion only,

Every scientific piece I have read has said it is harder for women to get aroused and takes longer for them to orgasm. If women got aroused as easily as you said men would be the ones running from sex. Also, I am not just talking about physical arousal. I am talking about getting in the mood to actually have sex. Although I suspect if society was more accepting of high sex drives in women things would be different as things stand this is not the case. How many times do you hear wives saying they don’t get enough?

 

[Elizabeth502]

The reason why women seem to bond stronger is because of a learned feeling of vulnerability.

Whoa. Scientific support for this? I think not!

Women bond because it is their innate nature to bond, because their core is centered on relationships, regardless of distinctions woman to woman and how they manifest that instinct for relationality.

We teach women to think and act like helpless little flowers so they want a big strong male to protect them.

Where did you get your rhetoric? The late '60’s?

 

[buffalo]

I remember some research about this very thing.

I found it:

Redeeming the Rainbow

…On the heels of Kinsey and Hay came Hugh Hefner, who in 1953 launched Playboy magazine, and with it the modern pornography industry. Hefner‘s initial target audience was the very generation of young men to whom Kinsey had been speaking on his college lecture circuit. “Hefner himself has been quoted as saying that if Kinsey were the researcher of the sexual revolution, he (Hefner) was Kinsey’s pamphleteer” wrote Dr. Judith Reisman (private letter to the author, May 1, 2009). She adds,

I think it’s important to…make it clear that Hefner was himself a typically sexually
restrained, virginal, 1950s American college male until he READ Kinsey. Kinsey
revolutionarized Hefner who then wrote his college paper on Kinsey, calling for a
gutting of our sex laws, bringing Joe College into the sexual change agent role for
the first time in history…That Hefner set himself the mission of being Kinsey’s pam-
phleteer is vital since this launched the sexual revolution, with the funding and cred-
ibility of the Rockefeller Foundation behind Kinsey. Remember, Hefner promoted
sex with children…as well as male impotence and homosexuality (via lesbian imag-
es) from the very beginning. EVERYTHING Kinsey/Rockefeller aimed for has been
advocated, funded, supported by Hefner’s Playboy and all of those that followed.
All is based on rendering male society impotent (without power) in its own civilized
masculinity. Just as Hitler pushed the super, macho man in order to control him, so
too did Hefner, Kinsey. All males are made impotent when they cannot function in
families with wives, women and children to defend and protect. (For more on Kin-
sey, visit Dr. Reisman’s website at www.drjudithreisman.com).

One wouldn’t automatically recognize Playboy as a tool of “gay” social engineering, but it was and is precisely that. Indeed, Dr. Reisman argues that all pornography is essentially homosexual because it is in fact created by men for the sexual gratification of other men. On a more practical level, the existence of a thriving pornography industry serves the “gay” cause by morally corrupting the men who use it, making them less likely to oppose homosexuality on moral grounds and more likely to support public policies which legitimize sexual hedonism. Exposure to pornography, especially at a young age, can also be a gateway into the “gay” lifestyle itself.

 

[Regular_Atheist]

No - it is not immutable. There are plenty of people who have overcome it.

As time goes on it may become harder to change because of the brain changes.

We should also remember - anything is possible with God. If we are looking for man to solve this perhaps he is incapable without help.

If God could just cure homosexuality, then why do people who are already religious and God-fearing need to take part in therapy to ‘cure’ their homosexuality?

I don’t think it’s right to put concepts like God and Satan into health and medicine. I think putting faith into unverifiable concepts when it comes to such serious situations is risky. I think that the often religious overtones of conversion therapy is what puts people off accepting it. Besides, I’ve been cured of plenty of ailments and never once have I sought help from any god.

Anyway, it could be either psychological or partially biological, but I don’t believe anyone has ever claimed that there is some kind of single, magical ‘gay gene’ that automatically makes people homosexual, but rather that genetics may influence it slightly, and I’ve read articles stating that even if it is partially genetically influenced it could still be changed.

 

[buffalo]

If God could just cure homosexuality, then why do people who are already religious and God-fearing need to take part in therapy to ‘cure’ their homosexuality?

I don’t think it’s right to put concepts like God and Satan into health and medicine. I think putting faith into unverifiable concepts when it comes to such serious situations is risky. I think that the often religious overtones of conversion therapy is what puts people off accepting it. Besides, I’ve been cured of plenty of ailments and never once have I sought help from any god.

Anyway, it could be either psychological or partially biological, but I don’t believe anyone has ever claimed that there is some kind of single, magical ‘gay gene’ that automatically makes people homosexual, but rather that genetics may influence it slightly, and I’ve read articles stating that even if it is partially genetically influenced it could still be changed.

God and Satan absolutely belong in health and medicine. It was satan after all that brought death, corruption and sin into the world. So we have been “sick” since then. We are devolving about 5% per year.

God also grants man tools to help heal. But He Himself is the Supreme Physician. Catholics would pray that God guide the hand of the surgeon.

Remember - “Jesus, I Trust In You!”

 

[CopticChristian]

Anyway, it could be either psychological or partially biological, but I don’t believe anyone has ever claimed that there is some kind of single, magical ‘gay gene’ that automatically makes people homosexual, but rather that genetics may influence it slightly, and I’ve read articles stating that even if it is partially genetically influenced it could still be changed.

Regular,

If God could just cure homosexuality, then why do people who are already religious and God-fearing need to take part in therapy to ‘cure’ their homosexuality?

You have to believe in God, know what God is able to do and then this is possible. If you had a malady and did not believe in God then for you God may or may not do anything. Miracles do happen however.

I believe that many with addiction can find the same results they find in AA in the Church, but because of marketing and the sales pitch of AA most people think you have to go to AA in spite of its miserable success rate of 5%…yet people go and the ones that succeed tout its wonders.

I don’t think it’s right to put concepts like God and Satan into health and medicine. I think putting faith into unverifiable concepts when it comes to such serious situations is risky. I think that the often religious overtones of conversion therapy is what puts people off accepting it. Besides, I’ve been cured of plenty of ailments and never once have I sought help from any god.

Why would you believe it is right to put God/Satan into health. Transpersonal Psychology disagrees with you…I believe that when you look at conversion therapy that does not equate to reparative therapy…there may or may not be religious overtones and if their are then that may be relevant. A person that feels that it is their moral obligation to overcome what they believe to be a malady in SSA/Homosexuality has the right to subjugate their humanity for their spirituality and it is not right to force someone to subjugate their sprituality for their humanity as is posed by the American Psychiatric Association and SB-1172 in California, doomed to fail.

Change is possible for those tha believe change is possible and the literature has reports of many modalities that work…change is not possible for those that believe change is not possible…

 

[Publisher]

This cuts both ways: many adult homosexuals have said they had girlfriends in school. They were attracted to them. But that aside, what people find tempting can change. (Many adults desire sexual acts a description of which would have traumatized them as children.)

I’ve been told at least ten times by a gay person that “I knew since I was five” (-or four, or six, but the number is always less than seven). When I ask what this means exactly----I find the awareness of sexual orientation so far before puberty confusing— they invariably change the subject. I asked a former Jesuit who became a psychologist about this. (He wasn’t gay but was telling me of a gay priest he had known for decades and mentioned the priest and told him he ‘always knew.’ When I said I don’t know what it means to know what one’s sexual orientation is so far before puberty, he got a funny look on his face and said, “You know what? I don’t either! When you think about it, it doesn’t make sense.”)

I have never heard a heterosexual claim to have known at that age; indeed, most heterosexuals at that age prefer the company of other boys and think girls have “cooties.”

Those gay men and women I know all state they “knew”…what they “knew” was not “I am a homosexual”…but that in some way they could not put their finger on…they were different. The awareness of the difference was something they experienced…how does a five, six or seven year old use language to explain what they are feeling deep inside themselves? All they really know, they somehow are not the “same” as their peers.

As an adult or adolescent once that “difference” is understood to what the “difference” is, they look back and realize…“THAT was the difference I have always known.”

 

[CopticChristian]

Those gay men and women I know all state they “knew”…what they “knew” was not “I am a homosexual”…but that in some way they could not put their finger on…they were different. The awareness of the difference was something they experienced…how does a five, six or seven year old use language to explain what they are feeling deep inside themselves? All they really know, they somehow are not the “same” as their peers.

As an adult or adolescent once that “difference” is understood to what the “difference” is, they look back and realize…“THAT was the difference I have always known.”

Publisher,

And a child that experiences the world according to Piaget when stating that they feel and believe that they are different depend on outside sources other than themselves to understand that difference…no 5 year old says…I think that I am destined for anal sex…

 

[meltzerboy]

If God could just cure homosexuality, then why do people who are already religious and God-fearing need to take part in therapy to ‘cure’ their homosexuality?

I don’t think it’s right to put concepts like God and Satan into health and medicine. I think putting faith into unverifiable concepts when it comes to such serious situations is risky. I think that the often religious overtones of conversion therapy is what puts people off accepting it. Besides, I’ve been cured of plenty of ailments and never once have I sought help from any god.

Anyway, it could be either psychological or partially biological, but I don’t believe anyone has ever claimed that there is some kind of single, magical ‘gay gene’ that automatically makes people homosexual, but rather that genetics may influence it slightly, and I’ve read articles stating that even if it is partially genetically influenced it could still be changed.

You seem to be referring to a genetic predisposition or susceptibility. That is the case with many disorders and conditions. It means that the genetic markers make one more vulnerable to environmental influences or triggers that may activate the condition. This mechanism is different in kind and magnitude from that of genetic determinants in which the probability of an outcome is much higher and not so dependent on environmental influences, but rather biologically-driven developmental, maturational processes.

 

[markeverett49]

Those gay men and women I know all state they “knew”…what they “knew” was not “I am a homosexual”…but that in some way they could not put their finger on…they were different. The awareness of the difference was something they experienced…how does a five, six or seven year old use language to explain what they are feeling deep inside themselves? All they really know, they somehow are not the “same” as their peers.

As an adult or adolescent once that “difference” is understood to what the “difference” is, they look back and realize…“THAT was the difference I have always known.”

I don’t think this will fly. Many children feel “different” (–it’s why children relate to stories of being adopted or ‘found’ or raised by distant, creepy relatives who cannot understand them). Many children ARE different----some wear glasses, some are clumsy, some have speech impediments, some are easily frightened or embarrassed, and all manner of other things. Feeling different is attributable to many things in children but not, I think, an awareness of their sexual orientation, which would also require a sense that other people had a different one. Given that children that age do not know what a sexual orientation is, it is hard to credit the notion that they would think it answered the question ‘why do I feel different?’ As for the idea that they later consider themselves gay and THEN claim they ‘knew when they were five’ (because THAT is why they felt different), well, there would be little reason to credit this. (It is a commonplace that people reinterpret their childhoods in light of current thinking about themselves.)

 

[LisaA]

What you say is not supported by science at all. Oxytocin IS the bonding chemical so if guys have we bond. Case closed. The reason why women seem to bond stronger is because of a learned feeling of vulnerability. We teach women to think and act like helpless little flowers so they want a big strong male to protect them. Women don’t bond with men because they love us. They bond to feel safe.

Male’s spread AIDS more easily because of the type of sex homosexuals have. Even if women were being promiscuous they are less likely to spread AIDS because the amount of fluid a women produces in minor and unless one has a cut in the skin HIV is not as easily transferred. Homosexual men though tend to get rough which leads to tearing and hence increased likelihood of HIV.

Women put the breaks on sex because of the pregnancy issue!!! Raising kids is hard work and women do most of it. You don’t need a degree to figure that out. Guys may not need to feel “loved” but we do need to feel RESPECTED. When a woman wants to be intimate with a man that is a HUGE honor. I am quite sure if women found other ways to honor guys we wouldn’t be a buzzed about sex. If all guys needed was a release then to be honest we don’t need another person. We can release by ourselves easily and without troubling anybody. You friend is talking his opinion only,

Every scientific piece I have read has said it is harder for women to get aroused and takes longer for them to orgasm. If women got aroused as easily as you said men would be the ones running from sex. Also, I am not just talking about physical arousal. I am talking about getting in the mood to actually have sex. Although I suspect if society was more accepting of high sex drives in women things would be different as things stand this is not the case. How many times do you hear wives saying they don’t get enough?

Silentfactor you really need to get out more. Or perhaps update your understanding of females, their sexuality and reproductive system. Delicate little flowers? We are not speaking of Ante Bellum Alabama here. Further you completely failed to respond to my counter of your theory women resist casual sex due to fear of pregnancy. Again this is NOT the 1950s Any woman who wishes to engage in sexual activity and not get pregnant has access to free birth control and sadly if she doesn’t bother, she can (and many do ) abort.

What stops women from having the kind of casual sex so prevalent in the male homosexual culture is that women are ‘wired’ differently from men. Men, like males in any species, are much more naturally sexually aggressive and stimulated by the visual. I assure you that women do not have the same thoughts looking at a scantily clad stranger (male) as do men looking at a scantily clad stranger (female). Because women DO have the potential for pregnancy, we have been designed not to take that risk with a man who is not interested in staying around for birth and raising of a child. Even if our conscious self knows a pregnancy is not possible that hardwiring makes women far more reticent of jumping in the sack for the physical pleasure when no relationship exists.

Men and women are different. I hope you realize that. Promiscuous sex in male homosexuals is because you have the aggressive sexual nature of the male, the visual stimulus and no female to put on the brakes.

And yes you are correct that AIDS is more easily spread with male homosexual activity but were there not so much anonymous sex, so much casual sex, it would not have spread epidemic fashion as it did. Again, more evidence that our bodies were meant to function in a certain way and deviating from our natural order has consequences.

As to speed of arousal and orgasm, again you need to look more evidence. As biologists note, we are hardwired for speedy sex to avoid being vulnerable for any length of time. The study noted was done by Shere Hite and although done a while ago, do you think our biology has changed much in THOUSANDS of years much less decades? Both men and women, if properly stimulated can achieve orgasm in approximately four minutes or less. The long wind up has other important benefits; closeness, intimacy, self giving. But if all you want to do is get your rocks off, it doesn’t take that long.

At any rate I find your assurance that you are correct (case closed!!!) in all of these aspects of the discussion very curious.

Lisa

 

[LisaA]

I don’t think this will fly. Many children feel “different” (–it’s why children relate to stories of being adopted or ‘found’ or raised by distant, creepy relatives who cannot understand them). Many children ARE different----some wear glasses, some are clumsy, some have speech impediments, some are easily frightened or embarrassed, and all manner of other things. Feeling different is attributable to many things in children but not, I think, an awareness of their sexual orientation, which would also require a sense that other people had a different one. Given that children that age do not know what a sexual orientation is, it is hard to credit the notion that they would think it answered the question ‘why do I feel different?’ As for the idea that they later consider themselves gay and THEN claim they ‘knew when they were five’ (because THAT is why they felt different), well, there would be little reason to credit this. (It is a commonplace that people reinterpret their childhoods in light of current thinking about themselves.)

It’s so easy to take hindsight as truth without considering how it is colored by the years that passed in the meantime. I assure you that before I was 12 years old I thought males were another species but I had close girl friends (some of whom I still stay in touch with although it’s been 50 years!). Like many other little girls we were curious about each others bodies, not understanding the function of certain parts so to speak. Perhaps if one of my girlfriends had come out as a Lesbian she would look back to our natural curiousity and exploration at age five and six as an indication that she was “always a Lesbian” even though most little girls do the very same thing and end up marrying a man.

Lisa

 

[shelby_sun]

It’s so easy to take hindsight as truth without considering how it is colored by the years that passed in the meantime. I assure you that before I was 12 years old I thought males were another species but I had close girl friends (some of whom I still stay in touch with although it’s been 50 years!). Like many other little girls we were curious about each others bodies, not understanding the function of certain parts so to speak. Perhaps if one of my girlfriends had come out as a Lesbian she would look back to our natural curiousity and exploration at age five and six as an indication that she was “always a Lesbian” even though most little girls do the very same thing and end up marrying a man.

Lisa

That was you. I remember having a crush on a boy when I was 6 or 7 and an even bigger one when I was 10 years old, that one didn’t stop until I was out of high school. Other girls in my class growing up were “going steady” by 12 years old. My own children had crushes younger also. For the other stuff you mentioned, I never knew any girls that were interested in looking at other girls bodies and I went to an all girls school.

So do we learn to be straight, since people here claim that homosexuality is learned? If so, are parents failing at teaching their children to not be homosexuals?

 

[LisaA]

That was you. I remember having a crush on a boy when I was 6 or 7 and an even bigger one when I was 10 years old, that one didn’t stop until I was out of high school. Other girls in my class growing up were “going steady” by 12 years old. My own children had crushes younger also. For the other stuff you mentioned, I never knew any girls that were interested in looking at other girls bodies and I went to an all girls school.

So do we learn to be straight, since people here claim that homosexuality is learned? If so, are parents failing at teaching their children to not be homosexuals?

As to your experiences, to paraphrase “that was you.” However if you are around small children you would easily observe that at early ages they basically have friendships with their own sex. Just look at any book on child development and there are well established patterns of same sex friendships and identification. There are periods of development where the child finds the opposite sex totally unattractive…“boys are dirty and have germs” “girls are icky.” So using hindsight, such normal patterns of development could be construed as a preview of a homosexual adulthood? Really?

As to having a “crush” at age 6…at that age you were aware of male and female sexuality and saw your “crush” as a sexual partner? Really? You were VERY precocious! I didn’t even know about sex until a few years later. As to having a “boyfriend” I was age four and my “boyfriend’s” name was Ricky Richards and he had curly red hair. Again it was child’s play, imitating adults. We used to pretend to smoke candy cigarettes too (yes this was a while ago) or put on our parents’ clothes and shoes and walk around. Children are great imitators but I suspect a six year old with an opposite sex “crush” has no idea about adult sexual activity.

As to parents failing their children, clearly they are with respect to failing to model the self giving love of marriage. With the divorces, shack ups, hook ups and screw ups of adults these days, it’s a wonder more of them don’t end up completely confused about relationships. Further there ARE studies that children of homosexual parents ARE influenced by their parents’ behavior and sexuality. As to learning homosexuality, I suspect that the availability of internet porn has a lot more influence than do parents.

Lisa