Housesitting - Scandal?

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OrangeOwl

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So… I see a lot of threads where people ask if it’s ok if their boyfriend/girlfriend stays the night in a separate room. The answer is generally no.

What about if I’m asking my boyfriend/girlfriend to housesit for me and watch my dogs? This person will stay in my guestroom overnight. And obviously I will be out of town. Is there any element of scandal in this situation? Such as where people don’t realize that I’m out of town?

The misperception of people around here generally seems to be pretty high. My parents visit me relatively often, and a lot of them thought they lived here (one person even thought I was the one who was visiting).

Quick responses would be ideal, as I need to figure something out today.
 
Sounds perhaps the way to go is they ought to take your dogs to where they live (if allowed) and come and check on the house in the day time.

(PS – gee I hope you know if it is your boyfriend or girlfriend ;):D)
 
Bookcat said:
Sounds perhaps the way to go is they ought to take your dogs to where they live (if allowed) and come and check on the house in the day time.

(PS – gee I hope you know if it is your boyfriend or girlfriend ;):D)
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I wish. Unfortunately, this person just moved somewhere that is “pet-negotiable” and is reluctant to bring up dogs this early in the lease. Pet rent had also been mentioned. I also really dislike the idea of a kennel.

So you think it’s ok, then?

I was trying to compare it to this post: jimmyakin.org/2005/03/cohabiting_fals.html

If anyone brings it up, I’ll obviously correct any misunderstanding.
 
I have used a kennel… they can be fine…

Also there are those who will take your dogs into their homes and who have a even a license to do so – we are doing just that when we go on vacation this year. Or a person can come visit your home every few hours and take care of the dogs. (all for a fee of course)
 
I am not sure how having someone stay at your house when you are not there,
so that your pets and home are taken care of in your absence could cause “scandal”.

I am sorry, that is probably the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!
If someone is “scandalized” by someone house/pet sitting, they have issues that really need professional help.
 
Oneofthewomen said:
I am not sure how having someone stay at your house when you are not there,
so that your pets and home are taken care of in your absence could cause “scandal”.

I am sorry, that is probably the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!
If someone is “scandalized” by someone house/pet sitting, they have issues that really need professional help.
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Their concern is not regarding “someone” housesitting but a boyfriendgirlfriend. Giving the appearance that they are “sleeping over”.

Such is a valid concern.

And their further knowledge of how things are presumed in their area there further plays into the question. Another valid aspect.
 
Bookcat said:
I have used a kennel… they can be fine…

Also there are those who will take your dogs into their homes and who have a even a license to do so – we are doing just that when we go on vacation this year. Or a person can come visit your home every few hours and take care of the dogs. (all for a fee of course)
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I have also used kennels, and a dog I used to have got kennel cough. My dogs are small, and one of them is an eight-month-old puppy.

I tried calling a lady who does take in dogs, but she was so abrasive and rude the last time I tried, that I really don’t want to bother with her anymore. The other options are unavailable.

The housesitter is really the best option. The person is free, knows my dogs, and I have a yard so the dogs aren’t trapped in a cage for a week.

Are these options just your personal preferences, or do you really think they’re required? I’m just trying to avoid mortal sin here in the most convenient way possible. I’m not interested in bending over backwards to prevent people’s rash judgments.
 
Bookcat said:
Their concern is not regarding “someone” housesitting but a boyfriendgirlfriend. Giving the appearance that they are “sleeping over”.

Such is a valid concern.

And their further knowledge of how things are presumed in their area there further plays into the question. Another valid aspect.
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The only presumption was that I never lived in my own house. No one ever voiced a presumption that I was having a significant other sleeping over.
 
OrangeOwl said:
The only presumption was that I never lived in my own house. No one ever voiced a presumption that I was having a significant other sleeping over.
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I am guessing that you are a grown adult, so why are you worried about this?
If someone is “scandalized” by your boyfriend/girlfriend staying at your home, while you are gone, to watch your house & pets- IT IS THEIR PROBLEM, NOT YOURS!!

I’ll say it again- this is ridiculous.
OP if you are really worried, get off the internet and call your priest!!
 
OrangeOwl said:
The only presumption was that I never lived in my own house. No one ever voiced a presumption that I was having a significant other sleeping over.
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Yes I understand.

Such a question has not yet had cause to rise.

(I am not saying by the way anything conclusive one way or the other…but I do see your concern as a valid concern–and you do well to consider these aspects)
 
Bookcat said:
Their concern is not regarding “someone” housesitting but a boyfriendgirlfriend. Giving the appearance that they are “sleeping over”.

Such is a valid concern.

And their further knowledge of how things are presumed in their area there further plays into the question. Another valid aspect.
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What do appearances have to do with anything if it has nothing to do with the truth? I’m a little confused by this. I’m newly back to the Catholic religion and if I have to worry about how something appears rather than what is in my heart and what my intentions are, then I might rethink it.
 
Christmastwin said:
What do appearances have to do with anything if it has nothing to do with the truth? I’m a little confused by this. I’m newly back to the Catholic religion and if I have to worry about how something appears rather than what is in my heart and what my intentions are, then I might rethink it.
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Because they can lead other to sin or to the idea that Christians live in a not good way.

Jimmy has some good observations here:
jimmyakin.org/2005/03/cohabiting_fals.html
 
Also Paul notes in Romans a good verse to meditate on:

“it is right to not eat meat or drink wine or do anything that makes your brother stumble”

(Rom 14:21 RSVCE)
 
Christmastwin said:
What do appearances have to do with anything if it has nothing to do with the truth? I’m a little confused by this. I’m newly back to the Catholic religion and if I have to worry about how something appears rather than what is in my heart and what my intentions are, then I might rethink it.
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Also Paul notes in Romans a good verse to meditate on:

“it is right to not eat meat or drink wine or do anything that makes your brother stumble”

(Rom 14:21 RSVCE)
 
Oneofthewomen said:
I am not sure how having someone stay at your house when you are not there,
so that your pets and home are taken care of in your absence could cause “scandal”.

I am sorry, that is probably the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!
If someone is “scandalized” by someone house/pet sitting, they have issues that really need professional help.
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Amen to this. I really can’t believe anyone would think this to be scandalous. My mind is boggled.
 
Christmastwin said:
What do appearances have to do with anything if it has nothing to do with the truth? I’m a little confused by this. I’m newly back to the Catholic religion and if I have to worry about how something appears rather than what is in my heart and what my intentions are, then I might rethink it.
Click to expand...
Also Paul notes in Romans a good verse to meditate on:

“it is right to not eat meat or drink wine or do anything that makes your brother stumble”

(Rom 14:21 RSVCE)
 
Please explain to me how the OP’s situation, in any way, shape or form can do this
SCANDAL
Any action or its omission, not necessarily sinful in itself, that is likely to induce another to do something morally wrong. Direct scandal, also called diabolical, has the deliberate intention to induce another to sin. In indirect scandal a person does something that he or she forsees will at least likely lead another to commit sin, but this is rather tolerated than positively desired. (Etym. Latin scandalum, stumbling block.)
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🤷:confused:

This is getting out of hand- “scandal” is not hiding around every corner, and if anyone thinks it is, I urge you to get professional/spiritual help- asap!!
 
Oneofthewomen said:
Please explain to me how the OP’s situation, in any way, shape or form can do this
🤷:confused:

This is getting out of hand- “scandal” is not hiding around every corner, and if anyone thinks it is, I urge you to get professional/spiritual help- asap!!
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sigh of relief 😛
 
Bookcat said:
Yes I understand.

Such a question has not yet had cause to rise.

(I am not saying by the way anything conclusive one way or the other…but I do see your concern as a valid concern–and you do well to consider these aspects)
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Well, okay then. I’m all for considering the aspects of the situation. Obviously. Otherwise, I would’ve never even brought the situation up. But if even you can’t say that it’s seriously wrong, I’m going to go ahead and do it – unless someone else has concerns about. If that is the case, please raise them.
 
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